1
00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:02,836
(theme song playing)

2
00:00:02,919 --> 00:00:06,214
CHORUS: <i>♪ The Simpsons ♪</i>

3
00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:19,519
(bell ringing)

4
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,817
(whistle blows)

5
00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:43,501
(playing the blues)

6
00:00:59,225 --> 00:01:00,685
(honking horn)

7
00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:01,978
(tires screeching)

8
00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:06,107
D'oh! (screams)

9
00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:07,400
(tires screeching)

10
00:01:08,359 --> 00:01:09,360
BART: Whoa!

11
00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:11,905
-(Homer yelling)
-(crashing)

12
00:01:23,291 --> 00:01:24,959
{\an8}MAN (on TV): <i>The Cyborganizer.</i>

13
00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:26,419
{\an8}<i>A high-tech robocop</i>

14
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,880
{\an8}<i>created for one purpose only,</i>

15
00:01:28,963 --> 00:01:32,425
{\an8}<i>to help the N.Y.P.D. tackle</i>
<i>its tedious paperwork.</i>

16
00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,094
{\an8}<i>Good work, Cyborganizer.</i>

17
00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:36,137
{\an8}<i>I can streamline any procedure</i>

18
00:01:36,221 --> 00:01:38,473
{\an8}<i>except this thing you call "love."</i>

19
00:01:38,556 --> 00:01:40,934
{\an8}Aw... Poor Cyborganizer.

20
00:01:41,017 --> 00:01:44,062
{\an8}Homer, sitting that close to
the TV can't be good for you.

21
00:01:44,145 --> 00:01:46,606
{\an8}Talking while the TV's on
can't be good for you.

22
00:01:46,689 --> 00:01:47,941
{\an8}You should get your eyes checked.

23
00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:49,067
{\an8}I'm taking Bart to the mall

24
00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:50,652
{\an8}to buy camping supplies.

25
00:01:50,735 --> 00:01:51,903
{\an8}Why don't you come along?

26
00:01:51,986 --> 00:01:53,571
{\an8}Nah, I want to enjoy the show

27
00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,323
{\an8}before the network retools it.

28
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:59,244
{\an8}<i>How can I organize this modeling agency</i>

29
00:01:59,327 --> 00:02:01,871
{\an8}<i>and still be a good single father?</i>

30
00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,665
{\an8}<i>I love you, Daddy.</i>

31
00:02:03,748 --> 00:02:05,333
{\an8}Aw! Too late!

32
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,213
{\an8}We need something quick.

33
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:12,090
{\an8}My husband's eyes are really shot.

34
00:02:12,173 --> 00:02:14,509
{\an8}Whee! Touch the sky, Maggie.

35
00:02:14,592 --> 00:02:16,678
{\an8}Whee! Touch the sky!

36
00:02:16,761 --> 00:02:17,971
{\an8}Dad, I've got Maggie.

37
00:02:18,054 --> 00:02:19,222
{\an8}Who said that?

38
00:02:19,305 --> 00:02:20,473
{\an8}(exclaims angrily)

39
00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:21,558
{\an8}Come on, Bart.

40
00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:22,851
{\an8}While your dad gets his glasses,

41
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,310
{\an8}we'll go shop for your trip.

42
00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:26,146
{\an8}Oh, I hate shopping.

43
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,064
{\an8}Just get me a deck of cards
and I'll win whatever I need

44
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:29,149
{\an8}from the other kids.

45
00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:31,192
{\an8}But you need to try things on.

46
00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,736
{\an8}Every brand has a different idea of husky.

47
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,947
{\an8}(grunts) I'm in tantrum position.

48
00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:38,491
{\an8}"T" minus five, four, three...

49
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:39,993
{\an8}Remembering dead cat for real tears.

50
00:02:40,076 --> 00:02:41,077
{\an8}(crying)

51
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,246
{\an8}Fine. You win.

52
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:45,165
{\an8}I'll do your shopping for you.

53
00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,541
{\an8}Tantrum averted.

54
00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:49,711
{\an8}But now I can't forget the cat. (sobbing)

55
00:02:49,794 --> 00:02:51,421
{\an8}OK, let's get started.

56
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:54,716
{\an8}-(snoring)
-Oh! Hey, wake up!

57
00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:56,217
{\an8}(mumbling) Sorry.

58
00:02:56,301 --> 00:03:00,138
{\an8}-Now, read the first line.
-"I, eight, p-p."

59
00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:02,432
{\an8}-(giggling)
-Why you little...

60
00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:05,852
{\an8}-(grunting)
-(gagging)

61
00:03:05,935 --> 00:03:07,270
{\an8}WOMAN: Better, or worse?

62
00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:08,813
{\an8}HOMER: Worse! (grunting)

63
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{\an8}WOMAN: Better, or worse?

64
00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:11,816
{\an8}HOMER: Much better!

65
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,068
{\an8}(gagging) Dad!

66
00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,238
{\an8}That pair's popular with
celebrities like Val Kilmer.

67
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:20,200
{\an8}-Ooh, my favorite Door.
-And Yoko Ono.

68
00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:23,244
{\an8}Ew! She ruined The Plastic Ono Band.

69
00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,371
{\an8}Maybe you're a candidate
for laser eye surgery.

70
00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:27,332
{\an8}Will it get me out of
having to choosing glasses?

71
00:03:27,415 --> 00:03:29,125
{\an8}Well, yes, but I must warn you

72
00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:31,294
{\an8}it's an experimental procedure
and we still don't know

73
00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:33,379
{\an8}-the long-term effects.
-Less yappin', more zappin'!

74
00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:35,757
Well, looks like we got everything

75
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,383
for Bart's camping trip.

76
00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:39,552
Blair Witch repellent, antler saw,

77
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:41,262
and deep woods Scrabble.

78
00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:43,932
(gasps) Ooh, <i>Tango De La Muerte!</i>

79
00:03:44,015 --> 00:03:46,017
I've been dying to see that movie.

80
00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:48,978
{\an8}It got rave reviews from both
the Entertainment Radio Network

81
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,480
{\an8}and the Radio Entertainment Network.

82
00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:51,856
Let's go.

83
00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:55,818
-(zapping)
-(Homer screaming)

84
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,528
Wait. You've got to use these drops.

85
00:03:57,612 --> 00:03:59,197
They prevent your eyes from crusting over.

86
00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,116
Oh, here we go with
the add-ons. No, thanks.

87
00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:10,583
<i>Now that my severed foot</i>
<i>has been reattached,</i>

88
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,710
<i>I must win back the coveted dance title</i>

89
00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,128
<i>"Locolegs."</i>

90
00:04:14,212 --> 00:04:16,714
<i>As your wise but alcoholic dance coach,</i>

91
00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,007
<i>I know that somewhere</i>

92
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,926
<i>your father is looking down on you</i>

93
00:04:20,009 --> 00:04:21,427
<i>and smiling.</i>

94
00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:22,720
<i>Oh, there he is.</i>

95
00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:25,181
<i>And now, I must choose a beautiful partner</i>

96
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,808
<i>for the big dance contest.</i>

97
00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:29,394
<i>Hmm...</i>

98
00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:31,062
(grunts)

99
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:32,730
<i>Mm-hmm...</i>

100
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:33,982
(grunts)

101
00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:37,402
<i>No. </i>(gasps) <i>Hmm...</i>

102
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,279
<i>Oh, he'll never dance with her.</i>

103
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:41,489
<i>She'll have to settle</i>
<i>for some Mexican Milhouse.</i>

104
00:04:41,572 --> 00:04:42,824
<i>I demand to know your name.</i>

105
00:04:42,907 --> 00:04:44,951
<i>My name is Lisabella.</i>

106
00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:47,537
(gasping) <i>That's my name</i>
<i>with "bella" on the end of it.</i>

107
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,747
<i>Ask her. Oh, God, please,</i>
<i>ask her to dance.</i>

108
00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:52,750
<i>I shall dance... with her.</i>

109
00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,585
-(grunts)
<i>- </i>Que malo.

110
00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:58,089
<i>Once again, I must sugar my own churro.</i>

111
00:04:58,172 --> 00:05:00,550
<i>But I am just a simple librarian.</i>

112
00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:02,760
<i>I've only read about dancing in books.</i>

113
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:07,473
(chuckles) <i>I will show you</i>
<i>something that is in no book.</i>

114
00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:10,768
-(all gasping)
-(gasping) <i>Ooh...</i>

115
00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:15,982
(moaning and gasps) <i>Mmm...</i>

116
00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:18,401
She's not plain. She's beautiful.

117
00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:25,325
(tango music playing)

118
00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:27,035
(applause)

119
00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:29,287
<i>There is just one dance</i>
<i>that will beat them,</i>

120
00:05:29,370 --> 00:05:31,289
<i>The </i>tango de la muerte.

121
00:05:31,372 --> 00:05:33,583
(gasps) <i>Only one was crazy enough</i>

122
00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:35,585
<i>to dance that dance and he is dead.</i>

123
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,712
<i>My twin brother, Freduardo.</i>

124
00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:40,214
<i>But where he died, I shall live,</i>

125
00:05:40,298 --> 00:05:41,424
<i>in his apartment.</i>

126
00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:46,054
(tango music playing)

127
00:05:50,266 --> 00:05:51,976
(all gasping)

128
00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:04,614
(applause)

129
00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:06,366
<i>You are now carrying my child.</i>

130
00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:07,450
<i>But how?</i>

131
00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:09,494
<i>It is the mystery of the dance.</i>

132
00:06:14,957 --> 00:06:16,959
Oh, Mom, I want to be a dancer.

133
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,961
That's wonderful, honey.

134
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,588
We should ask your father, though.

135
00:06:20,671 --> 00:06:22,215
Where is he, anyway?

136
00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:25,718
(imitating Marge) Now, Homey,
when we get to the liquor store

137
00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:29,180
buy me some Jack Daniels
and a carton of smokes.

138
00:06:29,263 --> 00:06:32,100
-Yes, dear.
-(snickering)

139
00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:38,022
(metal squealing)

140
00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:42,610
MARGE: Mmm... I remember
Little Vicki Valentine.

141
00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:44,278
Her perky smile and dancing

142
00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:46,656
brought America
right out of the depression.

143
00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:48,866
{\an8}Well, I think World War II
helped a little, Mom.

144
00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:50,701
Don't smart-mouth, Lisa.

145
00:06:50,785 --> 00:06:54,414
-A great big sunshine hello to you.
-Hi, Little Vicki.

146
00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:57,208
(chuckles) That was such a long time ago.

147
00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:58,918
I'm just plain Vicki now.

148
00:06:59,001 --> 00:07:00,294
All right. I'd like to sign

149
00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:02,171
my daughter up for lessons, Vicki.

150
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,215
-"Little Vicki."
-But you just said--

151
00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:06,634
So, what dance style
were you interested in?

152
00:07:06,717 --> 00:07:08,302
We have ever so many.

153
00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:09,887
There's ballroom...

154
00:07:10,638 --> 00:07:13,224
Ow! You stepped on my toes again!

155
00:07:13,307 --> 00:07:15,101
If you would just let me lead...

156
00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:16,769
You're not a leader, Seymour.

157
00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:18,855
Never have been, never will be.

158
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:19,939
Oh!

159
00:07:20,022 --> 00:07:21,232
There's square-dancing...

160
00:07:21,315 --> 00:07:23,776
<i>♪ Oh, the birdie in the cage</i>
<i>odd lady in the center ♪</i>

161
00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:25,445
<i>♪ Now the birdie is purty</i>
<i>and the crows hop in ♪</i>

162
00:07:25,528 --> 00:07:26,612
<i>♪ Pluck the feather all together ♪</i>

163
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,072
<i>♪ Hell-bent for leather... ♪</i>

164
00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:29,490
Or there's the dance

165
00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:32,493
that made me ever so famous, tap.

166
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:34,120
(tapping)

167
00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:36,414
But I want to learn a dance
I can use in real life

168
00:07:36,497 --> 00:07:38,666
like the <i>tango de la muerte.</i>

169
00:07:38,749 --> 00:07:40,001
Oh, bless your heart.

170
00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:41,419
Let's get you some tap shoes.

171
00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:42,837
Uh, Little Vicki,

172
00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:44,589
I really think she had her heart set on--

173
00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:47,091
A little advice...
Don't live through your child.

174
00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:48,176
OK.

175
00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:54,182
Camp is going to be great.

176
00:07:54,265 --> 00:07:57,226
Seven days without parents,
homework or ear medicine.

177
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:58,519
-(grunts)
-Yes, sir.

178
00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,062
This is going to be the best week

179
00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:01,522
of our young lives.

180
00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:03,774
I'm going to pound you two all week.

181
00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:05,109
Oh, what'd we do?

182
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:07,612
Nothing. But I got to pound somebody.

183
00:08:08,196 --> 00:08:09,405
NELSON: Ha-ha!

184
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:12,658
Now where do we go?

185
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:14,410
Well, I don't want to go home.

186
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:15,912
My grandma's sleeping in my bed

187
00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:18,456
{\an8}and she has skin like a basketball.

188
00:08:18,539 --> 00:08:19,874
Wait a minute.

189
00:08:19,957 --> 00:08:22,293
Everybody thinks we're at camp this week.

190
00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:23,878
We can stay wherever we want!

191
00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:26,214
Yeah! Like the four seasons!

192
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,049
Each room has its own safe.

193
00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:30,551
I've got a better place.

194
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,304
-The mall?
-Yeah.

195
00:08:33,387 --> 00:08:35,306
It's just like my dad always says,

196
00:08:35,389 --> 00:08:36,432
<i>For an evening or a week,</i>

197
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:37,975
<i>there's no place like the mall.</i>

198
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:39,227
<i>Food, fun and fashion,</i>

199
00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:41,103
<i>the mall has it all.</i>

200
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,856
What? What did he say?

201
00:08:45,149 --> 00:08:48,903
Now, the key to great dancing is one word,

202
00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:50,238
tapa-tapa-tapa.

203
00:08:51,822 --> 00:08:53,324
Tapa-tapa-tapa.

204
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,746
Teacher, my shoes are making noise.

205
00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:00,706
You must be Ralph.

206
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,458
My daddy shoots people.

207
00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:08,297
Good.

208
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,968
Good. Wait a minute,
somebody's off the beat.

209
00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:13,135
Let me hear you two.

210
00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:15,930
OK, now you.

211
00:09:16,764 --> 00:09:18,516
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

212
00:09:18,599 --> 00:09:20,977
(all laughing)

213
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:24,021
Children, stop it! For all you know,
she has a medical condition.

214
00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:26,190
-Nope.
-I see.

215
00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:27,275
(groans)

216
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,029
This is way better than camp.

217
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:34,448
No mosquitoes, no stupid camp songs...

218
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:37,285
<i>♪ If you're happy and you</i>
<i>know it, shop at Stan's ♪</i>

219
00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:40,204
<i>♪ Giant discounts on</i>
<i>your favorite major brands... ♪</i>

220
00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:41,664
<i>Attention, shoppers.</i>

221
00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:44,333
<i>The mall is now closed.</i>

222
00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:48,879
OK, folks, you heard
the recording, clear out.

223
00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:50,423
(both gasping)

224
00:09:51,173 --> 00:09:52,425
Quick! Up here!

225
00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:55,469
(both grunting)

226
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:56,721
Where are we going?

227
00:09:56,804 --> 00:09:58,306
Quiet. Just keep scurrying.

228
00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:00,266
BOTH: Whoa!

229
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:04,020
-Worms!
-Gold!

230
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:06,147
Wait. This is just chocolate.

231
00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:07,898
Chocolate!

232
00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:09,400
And these are Gummy Worms!

233
00:10:09,483 --> 00:10:12,236
-Gummy!
-Warheads, Jelly Bellies...

234
00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:14,280
We're like two kids in a candy store!

235
00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:15,573
BOTH: Yes!

236
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:20,703
Flavor's gone.

237
00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:23,706
Flavor's gone.

238
00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:25,207
Shoe fight!

239
00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:27,126
(both grunting)

240
00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:28,586
Ow! No golf shoes!

241
00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:31,339
-Ready, Milhouse?
-Gimme a sec.

242
00:10:31,422 --> 00:10:32,798
(grunting)

243
00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:40,514
BART: Ready? Jump! (grunts)

244
00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:42,308
BOTH: Whoa!

245
00:10:42,391 --> 00:10:44,393
(both screaming)

246
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,772
Whoa!

247
00:10:47,855 --> 00:10:50,650
Whoa! We're lumberjacks!

248
00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:53,194
Oh, my God! Look at this place!

249
00:10:53,277 --> 00:10:54,570
How could this happen?

250
00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:57,114
Candy chewed, wigs pulled from stands,

251
00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,659
cheese packages poked and re-poked.

252
00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:04,413
Every sign points to one obvious culprit,

253
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,457
a giant rat.

254
00:11:07,541 --> 00:11:08,876
You'll have to shut down the mall.

255
00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:10,419
On Presidents' Day weekend?

256
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:11,671
Are you crazy?

257
00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:12,838
Crazy with concern

258
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,090
for the public, yes.

259
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,299
Now shut this place down

260
00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:16,467
before the old folks come in

261
00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:17,551
for their morning walk.

262
00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:20,888
(feeble moaning)

263
00:11:20,971 --> 00:11:22,306
Open...

264
00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,058
Tapa-tapa-tapa.

265
00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:25,643
Tapa-tapa-tapa.

266
00:11:25,726 --> 00:11:27,895
-Oh, whoa!
-Ow!

267
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:30,690
Sorry. The floor's kind of
at an angle here.

268
00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:32,108
I'm going to move over there.

269
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,735
OK, from tapa-tapa-tapa.

270
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:39,115
Wh... (groaning)

271
00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:41,492
Lisa's bad dancing makes my feet sad.

272
00:11:41,575 --> 00:11:42,993
(sighs exasperatedly) Let's take five.

273
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,830
What am I doing wrong, Little Vicki?

274
00:11:45,913 --> 00:11:48,082
Well, you're falling a lot.

275
00:11:48,165 --> 00:11:50,876
-Maybe you should work on that.
-Yeah, well, no offense, but maybe I need

276
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,921
a little more instruction
than just tapa-tapa-tapa.

277
00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:55,798
Why, back when I was your age,

278
00:11:55,881 --> 00:11:58,008
I had 43 movies under my belt,

279
00:11:58,092 --> 00:12:00,428
and I had to do it without tapa-tapa-tapa.

280
00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:02,471
I would've killed for tapa-tapa-tapa.

281
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,348
Sorry. I'm just frustrated.

282
00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:05,850
Well, you'll never save

283
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,935
Grampa's farm with that attitude.

284
00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:10,312
You've just got to turn
that frown upside down.

285
00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,232
That's a smile, not an upside-down frown!

286
00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:14,483
Work on that, too.

287
00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,403
Hey, we got a postcard from Bart.

288
00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:18,821
"Dear Mom and Homer,

289
00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:20,114
I'm having fun."

290
00:12:20,197 --> 00:12:22,366
Aw, it sounds like he's having fun.

291
00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:24,785
Why does it have a picture
of Vitamin Barn?

292
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:27,496
Didn't you ever go to camp?

293
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,832
The old Vitamin Barn.

294
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:32,084
There's our Broadway baby!

295
00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:33,461
(groans)

296
00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:35,755
Hey, dig that crazy rhythm!

297
00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:37,339
I'm just walking.

298
00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:40,801
Listen, I know I said
I wanted to be a dancer but--

299
00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:42,553
And you will be a dancer.

300
00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:44,722
Look at you, all sugar and spice

301
00:12:44,805 --> 00:12:46,891
instead of equations and test tubes.

302
00:12:46,974 --> 00:12:49,977
Your daddy's precious dancing queen.

303
00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:52,563
-And you look adorable!
-(groans)

304
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,356
Now, honey, what were you trying to say

305
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,984
before we kept interrupting
with our loving proudness?

306
00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:58,819
Yes, our tiny tapper.

307
00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:00,237
What was it you were going to say

308
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:02,573
after "I wanted to be a dancer, but..."?

309
00:13:02,656 --> 00:13:04,950
But I just

310
00:13:06,410 --> 00:13:08,829
need more practice.

311
00:13:09,413 --> 00:13:11,457
-See ya!
-(tapping)

312
00:13:11,540 --> 00:13:13,501
Oh, what's that awful sound?

313
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,336
-The furnace?
-It's me!

314
00:13:15,419 --> 00:13:17,421
BOTH: Aww.

315
00:13:21,383 --> 00:13:23,761
Why is you so down, Little Miss Vicki?

316
00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:25,554
My kitty cat's sick

317
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:28,224
and I'd be ever so sad if she should die.

318
00:13:28,307 --> 00:13:29,308
(coughing)

319
00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:32,645
Well, I'm no animal doctor, or nothing,

320
00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,271
but whenever I'm feeling poorly,

321
00:13:34,355 --> 00:13:35,856
you know what fixes me up?

322
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,733
-Dancin'!
-Dancin'?

323
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:38,901
Dancin'.

324
00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:43,280
But I don't know how to dance.

325
00:13:43,364 --> 00:13:45,199
Oh, I'll show you how.

326
00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:58,504
There! Now you're gettin' it.

327
00:13:58,587 --> 00:14:01,298
Look at me, Powder Puff! I'm dancin'!

328
00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:11,767
(sighs) That cat dances better than I do.

329
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:13,352
WIGGUM: We'll catch that mall rat.

330
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,273
Sure hope this Acme kit works.

331
00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:18,941
Gosh, that cheese looks good.

332
00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:20,901
Think I could grab it
before that anvil hits?

333
00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:22,695
{\an8}I don't know, Chief.
It's a million to one.

334
00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:25,030
I like those odds.

335
00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:26,949
Ah!

336
00:14:27,783 --> 00:14:29,743
-(both snickering)
-(Wiggum groans)

337
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:32,788
{\an8}My mistake was grabbing
the cheese. (groans)

338
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:37,668
(humming)

339
00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:41,130
Professor Frink, will that spaceship
be ready for the recital?

340
00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:44,425
I have visited the future,
and yes, it will. (chuckles)

341
00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:47,511
OK, kids, tonight's the big night.

342
00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:49,597
Now, remember, the important thing is

343
00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:52,308
-to just dance flawlessly.
-LISA: Excuse me.

344
00:14:52,391 --> 00:14:55,436
-Why isn't my name in the program?
-It is, silly.

345
00:14:55,519 --> 00:14:57,187
You've got the most important part of all.

346
00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:58,522
"Curtain puller"?

347
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,858
No one can see the show
if the curtain isn't open.

348
00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:03,652
But... my parents
are counting on seeing me dance

349
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,988
And I've worked ever so hard.

350
00:15:06,071 --> 00:15:09,033
I'm sorry, Lisa, but giving
everyone an equal part

351
00:15:09,116 --> 00:15:11,911
when they're clearly not equal
is called what again, class?

352
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:13,412
ALL: Communism!

353
00:15:13,495 --> 00:15:15,122
That's right. And I didn't tap

354
00:15:15,205 --> 00:15:16,582
all those morse-code messages

355
00:15:16,665 --> 00:15:18,417
to the allies
till my shoes filled with blood

356
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:20,461
just to roll out
the welcome mat for the reds.

357
00:15:20,544 --> 00:15:22,171
(sighs) All right.

358
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,132
I'll be the stupid
curtain puller. (grunts)

359
00:15:26,842 --> 00:15:28,677
Smoothly.

360
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,846
Pull-a, pull-a, pull-a.

361
00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:34,224
(grumbling) I got your
"pull-a, pull-a, pull-a."

362
00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:36,644
Excuse me, Lisa, but I couldn't
help but overhear

363
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,020
your nerdly predicament.

364
00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,688
Maybe I can be of assistance

365
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:40,981
with the dancing, and the twisting...

366
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:42,816
<i>♪ And the kung fu fighting ♪</i>

367
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,109
(scatting)

368
00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:48,113
I first observed this technology

369
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:49,698
at the airport gift shop.

370
00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:51,033
-(clicking rhythmically)
-As you see,

371
00:15:51,116 --> 00:15:52,993
it responds to any percussive sound

372
00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:54,286
with an exuberant shaking

373
00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:56,622
if it's groove-thing, yeah, yeah.

374
00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:58,666
It's most entertaining,
but how does that help me?

375
00:15:58,749 --> 00:16:00,042
Observe.

376
00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:08,592
Ooh!

377
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:11,929
That's brilliant, Professor.
What will you think of next?

378
00:16:12,012 --> 00:16:14,515
{\an8}Well, I also found this at the gift shop.

379
00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:15,683
Isn't it cute?

380
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:18,102
I'm hoping to turn it into a weapon.

381
00:16:18,185 --> 00:16:20,896
(laughing maniacally) It'll kill ya.

382
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,314
I've got to go now.

383
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:29,238
OK, Mr. Rat, we've got
a little playmate for you.

384
00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,240
-(snarling)
-(clanks)

385
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:33,033
Should I get the backup lion, Chief?

386
00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:34,243
Would you?

387
00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:37,371
(sniffing)

388
00:16:38,455 --> 00:16:40,290
(whispering) Can you see
the lion anywhere?

389
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:42,626
(growling)

390
00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:44,837
-(squeaking)
-Well, do you see him or not?

391
00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:48,090
(squeaking)

392
00:16:48,173 --> 00:16:50,175
Are you saying he's right on
the other side of that plant?

393
00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:51,677
(squeaking)

394
00:16:52,219 --> 00:16:54,388
-(growling)
-OK. Run!

395
00:16:54,471 --> 00:16:57,349
-(roaring)
-(both screaming)

396
00:16:58,183 --> 00:16:59,226
(both gasping)

397
00:16:59,309 --> 00:17:00,644
This way!

398
00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:03,313
(both panting)

399
00:17:03,397 --> 00:17:05,315
BOTH: Uh-oh.

400
00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:09,194
-(lion growling)
-(both whimpering)

401
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:10,863
-(roars)
-(grunts)

402
00:17:13,323 --> 00:17:16,326
(purring)

403
00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:17,911
Bart, you're a genius.

404
00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:19,246
Ah!

405
00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:23,375
You OK, Milhouse?

406
00:17:23,459 --> 00:17:24,626
Nothing that a handful of

407
00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:26,295
Gummy Bears can't fix.

408
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:28,297
(both laughing)

409
00:17:30,257 --> 00:17:32,760
Well, well, looks like
the cat got the rat.

410
00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,512
And that's the end of that tale.

411
00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:38,182
Uh, Chief, should we try
and get the mountain lion

412
00:17:38,265 --> 00:17:40,476
-back in its crate?
-I repeat...

413
00:17:42,978 --> 00:17:44,104
OK, everyone,

414
00:17:44,188 --> 00:17:45,856
we need big smiles out there,

415
00:17:45,939 --> 00:17:47,441
so line up for dimpling.

416
00:17:47,524 --> 00:17:48,984
Now this may hurt a lot.

417
00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,736
-(gasps)
-What am I saying, "may"?

418
00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:52,613
-(firing)
-Ow!

419
00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,740
Now, that's a happy face.

420
00:17:54,823 --> 00:17:56,825
Little Vicki, I figured out how to dance.

421
00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:58,368
I can be in the show now.

422
00:17:58,452 --> 00:17:59,953
I'm sorry, Lisa.

423
00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:01,872
People go to a children's dance recital

424
00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:04,291
expecting a certain level
of professionalism.

425
00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:05,959
But... But you don't understand.

426
00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:08,128
(groaning)

427
00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:10,547
I ate too much plastic candy.

428
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:11,757
Heavens to Betsy!

429
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:13,133
The star of the show is sick!

430
00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:14,885
Whatever will we do?

431
00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:17,179
There's only one person who can
get us out of this pickle.

432
00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:18,722
-Lisa?
-Yes?

433
00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:21,725
{\an8}-Help me into Ralph's costume.
-(sighs)

434
00:18:21,809 --> 00:18:24,019
-(piano playing)
-Show time, children.

435
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,104
Let's go.

436
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:26,897
OK, curtain puller,

437
00:18:26,980 --> 00:18:28,649
this is your moment to shine.

438
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,068
{\an8}Oh, it's too important,
I'll do it for you.

439
00:18:32,986 --> 00:18:34,238
(groans)

440
00:18:35,864 --> 00:18:38,033
Lean, muscular children of Mars,

441
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,535
we bring you candy.

442
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,329
(all giggling)

443
00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:44,665
Let's walk over to them.

444
00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:46,708
Why walk when you can dance?

445
00:18:50,212 --> 00:18:53,465
(all rhythmically tapping)

446
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,008
Where's Lisa?

447
00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:57,845
Shh! This plot is hard enough
to follow as it is.

448
00:18:57,928 --> 00:18:59,805
<i>♪ On the spaceship ♪</i>

449
00:18:59,888 --> 00:19:01,014
ALL: <i>♪ Lollipop ♪</i>

450
00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:02,724
<i>♪ Gingerbread men ♪</i>

451
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:04,309
<i>♪ Like to do hip-hop ♪</i>

452
00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:06,687
<i>-♪ And chocolate chips... ♪</i>
-Huh?

453
00:19:06,770 --> 00:19:09,690
<i>♪ Make a rockin' fuel for rocket ships ♪</i>

454
00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:13,777
<i>♪ We just love to dance on Mars ♪</i>

455
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:15,279
<i>♪ Where everything's made... </i>♪

456
00:19:15,362 --> 00:19:17,990
There she is! Hi, honey!

457
00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:20,200
Wow! Look at her go!

458
00:19:20,284 --> 00:19:21,952
Yeah, that pressure we put on her

459
00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:23,203
really paid off.

460
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:31,503
What are you doing?

461
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:33,630
I can't help it, it's the shoes.

462
00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:36,466
Nobody upstages Little Vicki. (hissing)

463
00:19:43,056 --> 00:19:45,392
Oh... please stop.

464
00:19:45,475 --> 00:19:47,811
I'm just getting started!

465
00:19:49,229 --> 00:19:50,939
(audience gasping)

466
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:56,653
(cheering and whistling)

467
00:19:56,737 --> 00:19:59,573
Stop clapping! Whoa!

468
00:19:59,656 --> 00:20:01,825
Wha...! Whoa!

469
00:20:02,618 --> 00:20:04,411
Go, Lisa! Come on, everybody,

470
00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:06,079
give it up for my little girl!

471
00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:09,333
-(girls screaming)
-Whoa...

472
00:20:09,416 --> 00:20:11,168
Whoa... Please...

473
00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:13,337
Stop clapping! You'll kill us all!

474
00:20:13,420 --> 00:20:16,798
(screaming)

475
00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:19,593
(all screaming)

476
00:20:19,676 --> 00:20:21,136
Lisa's gone berserk!

477
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,055
Do something, Homer! Do something!

478
00:20:23,138 --> 00:20:26,058
(yelping and groans)

479
00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:27,392
Oh, thanks, Dad.

480
00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:29,561
I didn't think, I... just acted.

481
00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:32,522
Self-tapping shoes?

482
00:20:32,606 --> 00:20:35,234
-I'm ever so pissed.
-I'm sorry, Vicki.

483
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:37,861
I just wanted to be a dancer so badly.

484
00:20:37,945 --> 00:20:39,821
(sighs) I understand.

485
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:42,407
We all do crazy things
when we're desperate.

486
00:20:42,491 --> 00:20:44,660
I once destroyed
Buddy Ebsen's credit rating.

487
00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:46,536
-Why?
-He knows why.

488
00:20:47,496 --> 00:20:49,039
Jesus, Mary and Glavin!

489
00:20:49,122 --> 00:20:50,666
These shoes are in the "off" position!

490
00:20:50,749 --> 00:20:52,626
You mean, I danced all by myself?

491
00:20:52,709 --> 00:20:55,170
See, honey? All you needed
was to believe in--

492
00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:56,755
What are you talking about,
Professor Frink?

493
00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:59,967
They're clearly in
the "on" position. See? "On."

494
00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:02,594
I was merely trying to spare
the girl's feelings,

495
00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:05,722
-you insensitive clod.
-Oh... Oh!

496
00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:08,308
Well, now that I look even closer--

497
00:21:08,392 --> 00:21:10,018
Forget it, Dad.

498
00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:13,021
(groans) I guess I'm never
going to be your Broadway baby.

499
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:14,856
That's not true, honey.
You can always write

500
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,067
a depressing Broadway play of some kind.

501
00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:19,069
-You think so?
-Sure.

502
00:21:19,152 --> 00:21:20,737
It could be a story about people

503
00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:22,739
coming to terms with things.

504
00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:25,575
Hey, yeah. You could load it up
with lots of swears.

505
00:21:25,659 --> 00:21:26,785
That's what David Mamet does.

506
00:21:26,868 --> 00:21:28,954
Ah, I love you guys.

507
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:32,541
Uh-oh! It's out of its matrix!
Nobody move!

508
00:21:32,624 --> 00:21:34,793
Why, it's just a cute little weasel.

509
00:21:34,876 --> 00:21:36,920
(cooing) Hello, there, Mr. Weasel.

510
00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:40,924
-(loud zapping)
-(Homer screaming)

511
00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:42,509
<i>I'm down!</i>

512
00:22:31,266 --> 00:22:33,268
{\an8}Captioned by
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