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00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:05,561
(SINGING) The Simpsons
2
00:00:06,520 --> 00:00:07,931
(TIRES SCREECHING)
3
00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:10,167
D'oh!
4
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(EXCLAMING)
5
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(TIRES SCREECHING)
Ripped By mstoll
6
00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:16,281
(DINGS)
7
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Ha-ha!
8
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And now let us bow our
heads in silent prayer.
9
00:00:40,280 --> 00:00:43,602
Maggie! That's not what
you do with a hymnal.
10
00:00:43,880 --> 00:00:45,006
Homer!
11
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:47,686
What? I forgot to
floss this morning.
12
00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:50,968
Oh, somethings wrong
with Maggie.
13
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:52,769
We should get her
to Dr. Hibbert.
14
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But I don't see
him anywhere.
15
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The Hibberts now attend a more boisterous
house of worship. (CLEARS THROAT)
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00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:01,290
(LIVELY GOSPEL MUSIC PLAYING)
17
00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:03,169
(SINGING) Let the light
ALL: Shine on!
18
00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:04,890
From the lighthouse
ALL: Shine on!
19
00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,570
Shine on me
ALL: Shine on
20
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Shine on me
ALL: Shine on
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In the morning
22
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This is awesome.
Black God rules.
23
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:18,004
Shine on
Oh, let it shine on
24
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(CHUCKLES)
25
00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:21,850
Um, Dr. Hibbert?
Mmm-hmm?
26
00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:27,042
I hate to interrupt while you're
rejoicing but Maggie is terribly itchy.
27
00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:28,321
Mmm-hmm!
28
00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:31,445
Oh, this looks to be the
initial stages of chicken pox.
29
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Say amen!
Amen!
30
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Coat Maggie with this calamine
lotion and the scabbing will heal.
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The scabbing will heal!
32
00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:41,242
ALL: The scabbing will heal!
33
00:01:41,320 --> 00:01:42,810
Heal my scabs, Lord.
34
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Praise the Lord!
I can walk again!
35
00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:47,521
Hmm...
36
00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:49,808
What? My foot
fell asleep.
37
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(SCOFFS) Sweetie,
I know it itches.
38
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But you've got to
stop scratching.
39
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No!
40
00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:58,529
(GASPS) No!
41
00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,762
Here. Here,
play with your teddy bear.
42
00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,128
(GROANS) Sugar booger.
43
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:07,770
Aww, poor Maggie.
44
00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:11,089
(GASPS) Homer, don't touch her.
You've never had chicken pox.
45
00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:13,965
I know. And you did.
And you're great.
46
00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:17,886
Oh, I'm just saying it's very
dangerous if you get it as an adult.
47
00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:19,803
It can leave you sterile.
48
00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:21,211
Down there.
49
00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:24,483
(SCOFFS) You always gotta
work blue, don't you, Marge?
50
00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:27,609
You're better than that.
51
00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:30,209
Can't even go in
my own kitchen.
52
00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:34,251
Bet Bart's in there right now
licking frosting off my eggbeaters!
53
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:37,164
Mmm. Don't worry, Dad.
I'm saving one for you.
54
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(LAUGHS) I'll just leave it
here in the dog's mouth.
55
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:41,569
No!
Bart!
56
00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:43,848
That's a really
bad storage area.
57
00:02:43,920 --> 00:02:45,684
Hey, Homer.
Why the sour puss?
58
00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:47,569
Did you chug-a-lug
a skunky Snapple?
59
00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:49,005
I don't know. Maybe.
60
00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:50,730
Plus, my wife
won't let me inside
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because the baby's
got chicken pox.
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00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:53,761
Really?
63
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:55,001
Do you mind if I
bring my boys over
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00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:56,366
so she can
infect Rod and Todd?
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00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:58,488
Then there'll be
a pox on both our houses.
66
00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:01,286
Why would you do that?
Are you a bad parent?
67
00:03:01,360 --> 00:03:02,850
Au contraire,
man with no hair.
68
00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:04,968
You see, Rod and Todd could
only get the chicken pox once,
69
00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:06,844
and childhood's
the safest time.
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00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:09,088
So you want Maggie
to infect your kids?
71
00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:10,161
You betcha!
72
00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:13,323
In fact, some parents have been
known to hold "pox parties"
73
00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:14,731
so other kids in
the neighborhood
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00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:16,330
can get the disease
when they please.
75
00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:18,881
And would they pay handsomely
for the privilege?
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00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:19,927
They might.
77
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,002
You'd have to be
awfully money-grubbing
78
00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:23,809
to charge your
friends and neighbors.
79
00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:25,723
$15 to infect your kids!
80
00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:27,644
Now featuring the pox box!
81
00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:29,290
Pox box not recommended
for pregnant or nursing women.
82
00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:30,885
As with any disease box,
results may vary.
83
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:31,961
Pox box!
84
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:34,762
Welcome to our pox party.
85
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,605
Save room for punch.
Maggie's bathing in the bowl.
86
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(DOORBELL RINGS)
87
00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:43,726
Hi.
88
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,326
Luann'll pick up Milhouse
when the party's over.
89
00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:47,890
I'll just read in
the car till then.
90
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:53,084
Oh, Kirk. Come join
the parents in the kitchen.
91
00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:57,165
We're having alcohol drinks and dishing
on the parents who aren't here.
92
00:03:57,280 --> 00:04:00,284
Ordinarily, I'm not the one to
laugh at a man's urinary blockage
93
00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:01,885
but you should've seen...
94
00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:03,086
Oh! There he is.
95
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,206
Ladies and gentlemen,
96
00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:10,251
presenting the sister with the
blisters, the tot with all the spots,
97
00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:11,926
Maggie!
98
00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:17,364
(COUGHING)
99
00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:22,367
I feel like
a chicken already.
100
00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:24,807
I just made
an egg in my pants.
101
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:29,561
Hey, Marge.
102
00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:32,086
Hit me with a little hit
more of that silly slush.
103
00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:33,964
Chief, don't you
think you've had enough?
104
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:36,771
I'm fine. Watch, I can even
touch my gun to my nose.
105
00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:37,961
(BOTH GASPING)
106
00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:40,168
Don't worry.
I'm the "pief of cholice."
107
00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:42,402
I mean,
I'm the beef with no cheese.
108
00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:46,367
(SOBS) Why doesn't
Lou like me? Why?
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Knock-knock.
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Luann? What are
you doing here?
111
00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:51,969
I thought you were just
dropping Milhouse off.
112
00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:53,769
I could get some
coffee and come back.
113
00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:56,690
No, no, no. You stay.
I'll just drive home.
114
00:04:56,760 --> 00:04:58,489
Uh, who's gonna
let me siphon?
115
00:04:58,560 --> 00:05:02,167
Why don't you both stay and
have one of my Marge-aritas?
116
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:03,651
All right!
117
00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:06,570
I never drank one of these
without a cigarette in it.
118
00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:09,810
Now kids, in lieu of one of those
inflatable jumping things,
119
00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:12,850
please welcome
Mr. Krusty the Clown!
120
00:05:13,040 --> 00:05:14,087
(ALL CHEERING)
121
00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:17,005
Hey, hey, kids!
(LAUGHS)
122
00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:20,209
This putz only paid for 20
seconds so listen fast.
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Moishe caught
the chicken pox,
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he scratched
all night and day.
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00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,288
He asked the rabbi what to
do and he said... (BEEPS)
126
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Time! I'm outta here!
(LAUGHS)
127
00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:29,046
(TIRES SCREECHING)
128
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,846
Kirk, you look good.
Have you been working out?
129
00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,962
Well, dogs have
been chasing me.
130
00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:39,565
No one's been
chasing me lately.
131
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:41,529
What happened to
your last boyfriend?
132
00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:43,523
The one who would always go to
the gym after visiting you,
133
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then have lunch at
that place downtown?
134
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,048
You know,
his taillight's broken?
135
00:05:48,160 --> 00:05:49,525
I'm not seeing
him anymore.
136
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:52,285
Does that mean that there
might be a chance for me?
137
00:05:53,280 --> 00:05:55,931
Almost anyone's
got a chance now.
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00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:58,362
(ALL COUGHING)
139
00:05:58,440 --> 00:05:59,771
Goodbye.
Thanks for coming.
140
00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:01,962
If my party made you sick,
tell your friends.
141
00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:04,841
(MOANING)
142
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,041
Sweet Lizzie McGuire!
143
00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:11,044
You think that's traumatic?
144
00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,044
Mr. Stomach, are you hungry?
145
00:06:14,120 --> 00:06:17,567
"I'm always hungry, now make
with the pizza, fatso."
146
00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:18,766
(LAUGHS)
147
00:06:18,840 --> 00:06:20,604
You're the stomach.
148
00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:27,125
I have to do this for work.
149
00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:32,404
So Milhouse walks
into the bedroom
150
00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:35,723
and there's his morn and dad going...
(MIMICKING MOANS)
151
00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:41,043
(IN HIGH PITCHED VOICE) "Oh, Mr. Van
Houten, I love when you kiss me."
152
00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,248
(IN LOW VOICE) "Yeah, yeah,
kissing ladies is the best."
153
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,482
(IN HIGH PITCHED VOICE)
"Oh, baby, kiss my mouth."
154
00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:48,126
(IN LOW VOICE) "Kiss me
like we're in a fancy hotel."
155
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,929
All right, we get ii.
156
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,686
(WHIMPERING)
Marge, what's happening to me?
157
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:57,810
Oh, Homie, you got chicken pox.
But how?
158
00:06:57,880 --> 00:07:00,690
I don't know. I kept away
from Maggie all day.
159
00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:03,441
Uh!
160
00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:04,851
I'm so itchy!
161
00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:07,481
(CHOKING)
162
00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:12,363
Oh! Oh, yeah.
163
00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:13,727
Son, we want
to talk to you
164
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:15,643
about what you saw in
the Simpsons' house.
165
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:19,168
Well, I didn't see anything to get my
hopes up, if that's what you mean.
166
00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,971
Well, maybe you should
get your hopes up a little.
167
00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:24,407
They're already up!
They're sky high!
168
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:26,323
Your father and I
are going through
169
00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:28,687
what's called
a trial un-separation.
170
00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:31,167
And son, l want to
make one thing clear.
171
00:07:31,240 --> 00:07:34,164
Unlike the breakup,
this is not your fault.
172
00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:38,525
I can't believe it! Our family
might get back together again!
173
00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:45,568
(SINGING) Our house is a very,
very, very fine house
174
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:49,204
With two cats in the yard
175
00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:52,848
Life used to be so hard
176
00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:57,403
Now everything
is easy 'cause of you
177
00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:05,565
And our la, la, la
178
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,002
(BOTH LAUGHING)
179
00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:12,281
(SIGHS)
180
00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:16,286
I haven't daydreamed
in color in so long.
181
00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:20,569
Thank God. We were
afraid we lost you, son.
182
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:24,165
You sit in this
oatmeal awhile
183
00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,447
and it'll send
your itchies packin'.
184
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,001
Homer!
185
00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:29,521
Mmm!
186
00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:30,726
Homer oats.
187
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:34,442
Stop eating the oatmeal. That's
the third tub you've eaten.
188
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,250
(PHONE RINGING)
189
00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:40,445
Y'ello? No. I'm not coming in to work.
I have chicken pox.
190
00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:44,283
I know I said that last
month, but I was lying.
191
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:45,601
Jeez.
192
00:08:45,680 --> 00:08:49,685
Right. Right.
Right. Right! Okay.
193
00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:51,882
Right. I love you. Bye.
194
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,566
I just got fired.
Better check the want ads.
195
00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:58,171
Ooh! Truck driver
needed in Iraq.
196
00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:01,207
Trucks are like big cars.
197
00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:02,441
(GROANS)
198
00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:04,922
Okay, Luann,
for honesty's sake,
199
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:06,206
we should
probably talk about
200
00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:08,408
everyone we dated
while we were separated.
201
00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:10,164
Well, the Sea Captain
and I...
202
00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:11,321
Yeah, okay.
I don't want to know.
203
00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:12,481
I don't want to know.
I don't want to know.
204
00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:14,887
So what are we gonna do
as a family today?
205
00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:17,611
Mini golf, pedal boats,
indoor rock wall?
206
00:09:17,680 --> 00:09:18,841
Um, Milly...
207
00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:21,002
Botanical garden,
build a bear workshop,
208
00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:23,088
arena football with
the Springfield Stun?
209
00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:24,491
Not today, big guy.
210
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:27,530
Your dad and I need more
time to get reacquainted.
211
00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:28,647
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
212
00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:30,961
Why are you laughing?
Tell me!
213
00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:32,644
Private jokes are rude.
214
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:34,404
Uh, son, here's 10 bucks.
215
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:37,211
Why don't you go to the bowling
alley and throw some solo balls?
216
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,209
But it's league night.
217
00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:43,529
(G ROANS) This trial
un-separation stinks!
218
00:09:43,920 --> 00:09:48,528
My parents used to compete for my
love and I'd cash in every time.
219
00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:50,927
And I always
got the spillover.
220
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:54,971
Drive-in movies, two
Christmases, soda with dinner.
221
00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:57,122
(SIGHS)
We lived like kings.
222
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:59,641
Remember when you told
my dad to go to bed
223
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:00,960
and he did?
224
00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:02,371
That was some New Year's.
225
00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:04,283
Now listen. I think
we should consider
226
00:10:04,360 --> 00:10:06,089
breaking your
parents up again.
227
00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:09,807
I don't know, Bart. I've wanted
them back together for so long.
228
00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:11,331
Look, you know they're
gonna separate again.
229
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,528
Why don't we just
speed up the process?
230
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:14,687
You know, Bart.
231
00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:18,282
My imaginary friend never made me
do things I thought were wrong.
232
00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:21,125
That's why he had
to go away forever.
233
00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:23,761
I thought you were gonna
let him come back!
234
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:27,481
I'm afraid he has to spend another
year searching for his brain.
235
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:28,561
(GROANS)
236
00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:30,321
(STRAINING)
237
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,923
Luann! I'm moving
my stuff back in!
238
00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:35,287
Uh...
239
00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:38,723
Dad, Mom says
you're stinky and gross!
240
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:41,169
Your mother said that?
241
00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:44,166
This is so great.
242
00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:47,006
I mean, she used to keep her
criticisms all bottled up
243
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,969
until they destroyed
our marriage.
244
00:10:49,880 --> 00:10:52,042
And I guess I am
a little funky.
245
00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:54,521
Well, this is what
cologne samples are for.
246
00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:56,644
(HUMMING)
247
00:10:57,280 --> 00:10:58,281
(SIGHS)
248
00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:03,290
Mom, I don't want to
get Dad in trouble,
249
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:05,681
but he just let me
drink a beer!
250
00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,560
Hmm, looks like we
have a problem here.
251
00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:12,727
The problem being that
you are addicted to fibbing.
252
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:17,846
lam drunk! I'll prove it! Watch
me kiss this picture of Nana!
253
00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:23,809
I can't do it!
She's so mean to me!
254
00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:26,326
She wouldn't let me
eat Froot Loops!
255
00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:32,249
Maybe my mom and dad are
meant to be together, Bart.
256
00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:34,641
You'd better hope not, 'cause
you know what comes next?
257
00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:37,644
Your worst nightmare.
A baby sister.
258
00:11:37,720 --> 00:11:39,609
Hi, Bart.
I baked you some cookies.
259
00:11:39,680 --> 00:11:43,048
Skanks for nothing,
Lame-orella.
260
00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:45,685
If you two don't mind,
261
00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:47,364
I'd like to watch
that cool Fox show
262
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,124
about teenagers
in Orange County.
263
00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:50,926
(HIP HOP MUSIC PLAYING)
264
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:52,968
Austin, I was
looking for my belly ring
265
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,202
in your recording
studio and I found this!
266
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:58,410
Does this or does this not
belong to Feather?
267
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:01,131
Sorry, Jade. That's how
we light it up in the OC.
268
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:04,449
You cheated on me! Our
mixed-race fling is so over!
269
00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:05,521
Whatever.
270
00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:07,608
Let's score some jam
at Knott's Berry Farm.
271
00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:08,801
For sure, dawg.
272
00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:11,645
We'll be kickin' it
old-school at Bigfoot Rapids.
273
00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:15,042
Gonna get my
flume on, log-style!
274
00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,090
(SINGING) We've been on the
run Driving in the sun
275
00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:20,447
Looking out for number one
276
00:12:20,520 --> 00:12:23,490
California here we come
277
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:27,087
Right back
where we started from
278
00:12:27,160 --> 00:12:30,164
Hustlers grab your guns
Your shadow weighs a ton
279
00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:32,607
Driving down the 101
280
00:12:32,680 --> 00:12:35,684
California here we come
281
00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:38,730
Right back
where we started from
282
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,404
California!
283
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:53,322
I bet that bra was planted by
Sterling to break them up.
284
00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:57,241
That's a brilliant idea!
Those TV writers are geniuses!
285
00:12:57,320 --> 00:13:00,051
Whatever they' re paid,
it's not enough.
286
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,601
This bra is really
gonna lift and separate.
287
00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:06,207
Lift your mother's suspicions
and separate your parents.
288
00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:09,523
LUANN: Milhouse, I need slender
fingers to get me a pickle.
289
00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:15,121
This isn't mine.
290
00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:16,361
(BOTH GIGGLING)
291
00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,249
I have a message
for your wife.
292
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:26,288
"Stop sleeping
with my husband."
293
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:27,401
Okay-doke!
294
00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:32,769
And you are? The wife
of your wife's lover.
295
00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:33,921
Does she know what
this is regarding?
296
00:13:34,040 --> 00:13:37,522
(SCOFFS) You moron! Marge is
having an affair with Kirk!
297
00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:39,648
(LAUGHS) That's ridiculous.
298
00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:42,246
No woman would want to
have sex with that loser.
299
00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:43,766
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
300
00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:47,162
And, uh, congratulations on
snagging him back. Good stuff.
301
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:48,844
Just answer me
one question.
302
00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:52,811
How did your wife's bra end up
in my husband's bed? (GRUNTS)
303
00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:55,241
(GASPS)
304
00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:57,802
This is Marge's bra.
305
00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:00,167
I bought it for her boobs.
306
00:14:00,760 --> 00:14:05,049
Of all the people for Marge to cheat
on, why did it have to be me?
307
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:07,808
Oh, boy, am I beat.
308
00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:10,770
If you want to return a
melon to the grocery store,
309
00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:12,285
clear your day.
310
00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:15,086
Well, that answers the mystery
of the missing melon.
311
00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:16,730
But I have one
more question.
312
00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:19,167
Did you sleep
with Kirk Van Houten?
313
00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:21,248
(GASPS) How could
you ask me that?
314
00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:23,721
I repeat. Did you
sleep with Kirk?
315
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:25,330
Homer, you're crazy.
316
00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:26,526
You're not saying "no".
317
00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:27,647
Fine. No.
318
00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:29,250
I'm still not
hearing "no."
319
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:30,845
No, no, no!
320
00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:34,049
Well, methinks the lady
doth protest too much.
321
00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:35,201
You don't trust me?
322
00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:38,921
After I salved every chicken
pock on your ungrateful body?
323
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:40,331
How dare you?
324
00:14:40,440 --> 00:14:42,761
I'm still
waiting for that "no."
325
00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,729
Get out of this house!
Gladly!
326
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:53,001
(GRUNTS)
327
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:03,924
We tried to break up your
parents and we broke up mine!
328
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:07,163
Wanna call my therapist
to tell her how you feel?
329
00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:09,044
Hello, Dr. Wexler?
330
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:12,764
DR. WEXLER: Stop calling me!
I'm on my honeymoon!
331
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,447
Yeah, it's that
weird kid again.
332
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:23,327
Dad?
(GASPS)
333
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:25,408
I thought Mom kicked
you out of the house!
334
00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:26,527
I came to get my mail.
335
00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:30,526
"Resident." "Occupant."
I can't open these.
336
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:32,090
Ooh! A traffic ticket!
337
00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:41,001
I'd do anything to get your
mother and that donut back.
338
00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:43,288
Okay, look, you and
Mom can fix this.
339
00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:45,124
What exactly happened
between the two of you?
340
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:46,281
Lisa, we don't need
to know how.
341
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:48,089
It's a natural
thing that happens,
342
00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:50,322
like a hurricane
or going to war.
343
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:51,561
Hmm...
344
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:52,801
Well, I'd better go.
345
00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:53,961
Where are you staying?
346
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:55,451
You know the Four Seasons?
347
00:15:55,520 --> 00:15:57,170
Well, I'm experiencing
them firsthand
348
00:15:57,240 --> 00:15:59,368
because I'm
living in the park.
349
00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:03,282
Bart, I think you're
behind this whole thing.
350
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,044
Yeah, I can see
how you'd think that.
351
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:06,810
But on the other hand...
(GRUNTS)
352
00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:09,802
Ha! I can read you
like a book.
353
00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:11,325
Ha-ha. You read books.
354
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,564
If you don't tell Mom
what you did, I will.
355
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:16,241
AW, come on.
356
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,448
Wouldn't it be easier
if our parents divorced
357
00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:20,522
and you compensated
by marrying much older men?
358
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,410
And meanwhile, I'll be one
of those weird guys who's 35
359
00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,404
and shows up at high
school basketball games.
360
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,081
(SIGHS)
361
00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:31,641
(GROANS)
362
00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:35,050
Why did I marry
that selfish jerk?
363
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,004
I've asked him to flip the
mattress a thousand times
364
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:38,764
and he never does.
365
00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:42,520
(GRUNTING)
366
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,050
Uh, Mom?
Hi, sweetie.
367
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:49,164
Uh, you know that bra
that broke up our family?
368
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:50,321
Uh-huh.
369
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:54,962
Well, I looked into it, and it
turns out I was responsible.
370
00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:56,007
Really?
371
00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:57,161
Well, just for that,
372
00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,369
I'm gonna erase all the saved
games on your PlayStation.
373
00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:02,807
What? How do you know
about things like that?
374
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:05,048
I learned about it in here.
375
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:06,441
Ha!
376
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:08,523
But Dad can come home, right?
No!
377
00:17:08,600 --> 00:17:10,523
But he's innocent.
Innocent?
378
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:13,968
After all I do for your father,
he still doesn't trust me.
379
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,405
I'm finished with him!
380
00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:19,644
Does this mean you and Dad
might get a D-A-V-U-R-S?
381
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:22,201
Young man, you go
work on your spelling
382
00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:25,443
or I'll delete all the custom
ring tones from your cell phone.
383
00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:27,847
No!
384
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,045
(SIGHS) Our reverse Parent Trap
just made everything worse.
385
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,885
Maybe we should use a
different movie as our guide.
386
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:35,530
Like Oklahoma!
387
00:17:36,760 --> 00:17:40,162
(SINGING) Oh, the farmer and
the cowman should be friends
388
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:44,161
Oh, the farmer and the cowman
should be friends
389
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,562
One man likes to push a plow
390
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,210
The other likes to chase a cow
391
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:51,887
But that's no reason
why they can't be friends
392
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:59,322
What do you think, Bart? A hoedown
could solve all our problems.
393
00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:02,768
I just need your chap size. lt's
two more than your pant size.
394
00:18:02,880 --> 00:18:06,646
How many times do I have to tell
you no Rodgers & Hammerstein?
395
00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,484
Rodgers and Hart?
No!
396
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:11,889
Well, what will trick your parents
into getting back together?
397
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,530
LISA: Enough
with the tricks!
398
00:18:14,360 --> 00:18:17,011
Stupid movie schemes
do not work in real life!
399
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:19,362
Mom and Dad have a
marriage on the rocks.
400
00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:20,930
And they need to work
through it in therapy
401
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:22,809
to make sure it
doesn't shatter.
402
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:26,003
Rocks. Shatter.
Jagged cliff!
403
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:27,890
Lise, you've just
given me an idea for
404
00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:31,447
the most insane, harebrained,
foolproof scheme ever!
405
00:18:31,920 --> 00:18:32,921
(SIGHS)
406
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:35,284
Okay, when my mom and dad see
this dummy fall in the river,
407
00:18:35,360 --> 00:18:36,566
they'll think it's me.
408
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:39,211
And they'll realize what really matters.
Each other.
409
00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:40,964
Do you like
the dummy, Bart?
410
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,042
I even made it
smell like you.
411
00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:46,089
Now make sure
Homer and Marge
412
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:47,685
are in proper
viewing position.
413
00:18:49,560 --> 00:18:53,007
So I got your note saying you
wanted to meet here to apologize.
414
00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:54,525
Well, I got
your note saying
415
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,728
you were gonna bring me
a bucket of potato salad.
416
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:58,564
Where's my apology?
417
00:18:58,640 --> 00:18:59,641
Where's my bucket?
418
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:01,165
Now I'll get Mom
and Dad's attention
419
00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:02,651
and you shove
the dummy in the water.
420
00:19:02,720 --> 00:19:03,960
Any questions?
Yeah.
421
00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:05,684
What are you going
as for Halloween?
422
00:19:05,760 --> 00:19:07,888
Pile of dog doo.
Let's roll.
423
00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:11,729
Mom! Dad! I'm playing
on a dangerous cliff
424
00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:14,690
because you're too busy arguing
to pay attention to me!
425
00:19:14,760 --> 00:19:15,841
(GASPS)
426
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:18,844
Bart! We're all disappointed
there's no potato salad!
427
00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:20,570
But for God's sake,
don’t jump!
428
00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:21,681
Now!
429
00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:24,240
I can't tell
which is which.
430
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:29,010
Oh, no! I'm already running!
(GRUNTS)
431
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:31,041
(GROANS)
432
00:19:32,120 --> 00:19:33,167
Whoa!
433
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:34,969
I did it, Bart!
434
00:19:35,360 --> 00:19:36,361
Bart?
435
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,201
(SCREAMING)
436
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:48,811
I'm a-comin', boy!
437
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:53,401
(BOTH SCREAMING)
438
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,124
(HUMMING)
439
00:20:02,360 --> 00:20:03,566
(WHIMPERING)
440
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:07,006
This is all my fault.
441
00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:09,560
I planted Mom's bra
on Milhouse's parents' bed.
442
00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:12,246
Why, you little...
(CHOKING)
443
00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:15,847
Homer, I can save you both.
Just let go of the rock.
444
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:18,244
Just do it! Trust me!
445
00:20:18,360 --> 00:20:19,407
Okay.
446
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:31,164
(ALL BREATHING HEAVILY)
447
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,684
Mom, Dad, I'd give
a kajillion dollars
448
00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:37,000
for you to
get back together!
449
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:38,969
Make it two kajillion. Homer!
450
00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:41,128
We'll lose the first
kajillion to taxes.
451
00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:44,927
Well, I guess you showed
you do trust me after all.
452
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:46,286
Of course I do.
453
00:20:46,360 --> 00:20:47,885
The only thing I can't believe
454
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,770
is that a woman as great as
you would be married to me.
455
00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:52,365
Aw, Homie...
456
00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:59,081
MILHOUSE: I don't want to
live in a world without Bart!
457
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:01,441
(GAS PS)
458
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:02,760
Can he swim?
459
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:04,604
What do you think?
460
00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:07,730
(SINGING) California!
461
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,962
California!
462
00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:16,722
Here we come!
463
00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:22,887
California!
464
00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:27,960
Here we come!
465
00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:40,687
California!
466
00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:45,367
Here we come!
Ripped By mstoll