﻿1
00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:06,368
(SINGING) <i>The Simpsons</i>

2
00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:07,761
(TIRES SCREECHING)

3
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D'oh!

4
00:00:10,320 --> 00:00:13,321
(SCREAMS)
<b><font color="#0A7C32">Ripped By mstoll</font></b>

5
00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:28,842
QUIMBY: Welcome to the
Mayor's Easter Egg Hunt.

6
00:00:28,920 --> 00:00:30,684
And now my
rarely-seen wife

7
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,404
would like to say
a few words.

8
00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:34,766
Thank you, Joe.

9
00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:36,365
In just a few moments,

10
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:41,606
the hunt will be opened by our own
rascally referee, Hugs Bunny.

11
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,089
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Sorry, kid.
(GRUNTS)

12
00:00:45,160 --> 00:00:47,083
Legally, I'm not
allowed to hug you.

13
00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:48,924
Now begin the hunt!

14
00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:52,561
Joe! You said
your wife was dead!

15
00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:55,564
And you said you graduated
from typing school.

16
00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:57,483
I have trouble
with the <i>space</i> bar.

17
00:00:58,640 --> 00:01:00,244
(CHILDREN CHEERING)

18
00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:08,169
Nelson, those don't
count as Easter eggs.

19
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:10,641
Yeah. But they count
as breakfast.

20
00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:12,161
(BIRDS SQUAWKING)
Ahhh!

21
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It was worth it!

22
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Yay!

23
00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:19,161
Yay!

24
00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:21,921
Yay!

25
00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:24,681
Yay!

26
00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:28,771
Ralph, there's a hole
in your basket.

27
00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:30,931
You're Lisa's brother.

28
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(YELPS)

29
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Hey! Nobody pushes around
my precious bundle of joy!

30
00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:46,010
Oops. Wrong one.

31
00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:47,281
I'll take that!

32
00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:49,283
Too slow, Droolie Joe!

33
00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:51,283
Peek-a-boo,
I steal from you!

34
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,205
(Comma)

35
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(BLOWS WHISTLE) Sir, you
want to set the baby down?

36
00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,044
Don't worry.
I just wanna talk.

37
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(GRUNTS)

38
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Silly rabbit,
kicks are for ribs!

39
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(BOTH GRUNTING)

40
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(growls)

41
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This house has such
beautiful wainscoting.

42
00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:24,209
(CHUCKLES) Well, Marge, I didn't
know you were into wainscoting.

43
00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:26,647
I read an article about it
at the tire store.

44
00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,882
Did you know
it's not named after

45
00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:30,923
someone named
Wayne Scott?

46
00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,650
WOMEN; Oh!
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

47
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(SCREAMING)

48
00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:38,646
You are now in
the mayor's office.

49
00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:42,560
This is the switch the mayor
uses to call his chief of staff.

50
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:45,650
(SEDUCTIVE MUSIC PLAYING)

51
00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:50,721
(SIGHS)

52
00:02:53,720 --> 00:02:56,485
That concludes our tour.
(ALL GROANING)

53
00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:59,729
But I'd love it if you'd all
join me for tea in the parlor.

54
00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:02,883
Tea? In the parlor?

55
00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:05,850
You're like all
Easter Bunnies!

56
00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:08,082
Can't take a punch
to the crotch!

57
00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:09,730
Maybe next time
you'll think twice

58
00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:13,930
before you
"volunteer to help children!"

59
00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:15,400
Oh, hey, Marge.

60
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,450
(CHUCKLES) This is
my husband, Homer.

61
00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:20,085
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

62
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,729
Ladies. Marge, is there
a small rip in my pants?

63
00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:25,086
(ALL GASPING)

64
00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:26,645
Homer, please.

65
00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:28,848
We're about to have tea.

66
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No tea. Security!

67
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(SEDUCTIVE MUSIC PLAYING)

68
00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:40,281
Oh! Everyone, just go!

69
00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:42,966
Way to blow
our tea, Marge.

70
00:03:43,040 --> 00:03:46,249
That's the last refrigerator
magnet calendar you get from me!

71
00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:47,731
We throw those
out anyway.

72
00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:49,370
You lie!
Stop lying!

73
00:03:50,240 --> 00:03:51,526
Hey, goad-lookin'.

74
00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:55,002
Want to snuggle
with Tyrannosaurus Sex?

75
00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:57,404
(GROWLS)

76
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No, I don't!

77
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I'm still upset about
what happened today.

78
00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:02,640
I don't have many friends.

79
00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:05,923
And when I finally start
to make some, you ruin it.

80
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:08,571
Oh, come on, honey.
You have lots of friends.

81
00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:11,166
There's, uh, Lisa,

82
00:04:11,240 --> 00:04:13,129
and the stove.

83
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,241
Hmph!

84
00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:19,683
Oh, that poor woman.
I'm gonna find her a friend.

85
00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:23,367
Someone cute, athletic,
with a nice laugh.

86
00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:25,445
(CLICKING)

87
00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:33,371
(GASPS) My husband
and my best friend?

88
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:35,121
(SQUEALS)

89
00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:36,521
(GROANS)

90
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:39,923
It's a risk I'll have to take.

91
00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:43,931
What'cha looking
for, Lisa?

92
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,286
Summer opportunities.

93
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:46,566
We're going to twin camp.

94
00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:51,601
(GASPS) Oh, my God!
"Spend a summer in Rome!"

95
00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:54,644
Rome? Founded by
twins by the way.

96
00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:55,960
Hey! Where'd she go?

97
00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:58,884
Oh, well. Let's talk in
our secret twin language.

98
00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:00,803
(BOTH SPEAKING GIBBERISH)

99
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:07,210
Okay, Lisa.
To study in Rome,

100
00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:10,204
an applicant needs
outstanding grades... Check.

101
00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:14,320
Uh-oh. Lisa, it says you have
to speak fluent Italian.

102
00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:15,765
Uh, check.

103
00:05:15,840 --> 00:05:17,171
You speak Italian?

104
00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:19,481
Of course I do.

105
00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:21,403
Why would I say it
if I didn't?

106
00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:22,561
(CHUCKLES)

107
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:24,047
Flawless logic.

108
00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:26,851
But I am gonna have to ask
you to speak a few phrases

109
00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:28,843
to verify your fluency.
(GASPS)

110
00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:31,401
Though not now because I have a
series of important meetings.

111
00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,250
(SIGHS WITH RELIEF)
How's tomorrow for you?

112
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,402
(WHIMPERS) Because
it's terrible for me.

113
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,682
But I'll get back
to you, soon.

114
00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:39,767
(WHIMPERS)

115
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,401
Son, I need to find
a new friend for your mother.

116
00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:44,642
So you're gonna have to
finish the shopping yourself.

117
00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:45,960
We're on Food Stamps?

118
00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:47,804
I wish.
I made these at work.

119
00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:49,211
(HOMER CHUCKLES)

120
00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:57,970
Hmm. I bet she'd be a good friend
for Marge. She looks defeated, too.

121
00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:01,681
Psst! Psst!

122
00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:03,971
(SHOPPING CART SQUEAKING)

123
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:14,486
Why does every woman I try
to talk to run into cans?

124
00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:16,802
(MAN ON RECORDING
SPEAKING ITALIAN)

125
00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:19,289
MAN ON RECORDING:
<i>I</i> want to rent a small boat.

126
00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:21,929
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

127
00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:26,804
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

128
00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:31,281
<i>I plan to dump this
body in the ocean.</i>

129
00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:32,641
Huh?

130
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:34,686
(GASPS)

131
00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:37,004
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

132
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,562
<i>This is what you get
for asking questions!</i>

133
00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:40,801
(GUNSHOTS)

134
00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:42,961
(SHIVERS) Oh!

135
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,606
<i>Arrivederci,</i> ignorance!

136
00:06:56,680 --> 00:07:00,002
Marge, I did it. I found a
woman to be your new friend.

137
00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:01,889
She's waiting
in the living room!

138
00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:05,210
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)

139
00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:06,721
(CAT YOWLS)

140
00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:09,127
Hmph. I'm going out
for some air!

141
00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:14,161
I bet you can't throw
a cat over the house.

142
00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:16,123
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)

143
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,481
(CAT YOWLS)

144
00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:19,601
Huh, I was wrong.

145
00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:25,843
MAN: (SINGING) <i>Everybody hurts</i>

146
00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:30,445
<i>Sometimes</i>

147
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:33,881
(SIGHS)

148
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,566
I guess I'm not
meant to have friends.

149
00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:39,207
(WIND WHOOSHING)
WOMAN: Stop that hat!

150
00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:41,886
(LAUGHS) Whoo!

151
00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:43,644
How about this wind, huh?

152
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,007
I don't know how you keep
your hair so perfect!

153
00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:48,208
Johnson's Water Seal.
(CLANKS)

154
00:07:48,360 --> 00:07:49,486
(LAUGHING)

155
00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:51,811
My name's Tammy.

156
00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:55,407
And these are my friends,
the Cheery Red Tomatoes.

157
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,767
(GASPS) The nationwide
social organization

158
00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:59,330
for women of a certain age?

159
00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:01,801
Yeah. But we don't sit
around watching television

160
00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:03,803
and eating bonbons.

161
00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:05,649
Well, except on
W-bonbon night,

162
00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:07,449
which is every
Tuesday and Thursday.

163
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:08,851
What are you doing today?

164
00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:12,049
We're gonna have margaritas and
poke gentle fun at our husbands.

165
00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:13,485
Would you like to join us?

166
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:16,040
Would I? Now let's see.

167
00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:19,681
Homer cut up my wedding dress
to make a badminton net,

168
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,285
which he never uses.

169
00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:23,681
He spent my last
three birthdays in jail.

170
00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:25,922
Called out his bowling
hall's name during sex!

171
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,482
Whoa, whoa, whoa, honey!
Save it for Johnny Fiestas!

172
00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:41,528
ANNOUNCER ON TV: <i>And now, we return
to the Vic Tayback Motel and Casino</i>

173
00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:46,208
<i>in downtown Las Vegas for
Has-Been Celebrity Poker.</i>

174
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,521
<i>As always,
all our celebrities</i>

175
00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:49,886
<i>are playing for charity.</i>

176
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,531
<i>What! I am so out of here!</i>

177
00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:56,205
Wow, Mom!
Great red dress!

178
00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:59,489
For your information,
I am now a junior member

179
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:01,887
of the Cheery Red Tomatoes.

180
00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:03,962
Marge? In a gang?

181
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:05,206
(LAUGHS)

182
00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:08,842
What are you gonna do?
Shoot me with a frosting gun?

183
00:09:08,920 --> 00:09:09,967
Seriously,
I would love that.

184
00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:11,480
(ALL LAUGHING)

185
00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:16,970
Oh, you guys
make everything fun!

186
00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:23,211
(GASPS)
That's my Italian tutor.

187
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:27,369
Oh, hey, Milhouse,
I think Bart's upstairs.

188
00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:30,762
I'm not here for Bart. I'm
here to teach you Italian.

189
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,923
Oh, sure. I get it.

190
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:35,128
Bart told you
I was taking lessons

191
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:36,770
so you thought
you'd come over and...

192
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:38,968
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

193
00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:41,846
That means,
"Please stop and listen."

194
00:09:41,920 --> 00:09:44,002
I'm the tutor
the company sent over.

195
00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:48,005
I'm here to teach you
<i>la lingua di arte e la musica.</i>

196
00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,686
You really speak Italian?
<i>Si.</i>

197
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:53,606
My grandmother, Nana Sofie,
lives in Tuscany.

198
00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:56,684
Since I was a baby, I've spent
two weeks there every summer.

199
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:01,927
<i>Nana hated English
because in World War II</i>

200
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,684
<i>a G.I. left her with Child.</i>

201
00:10:03,760 --> 00:10:05,444
<i>My Uncle Bastardo.</i>

202
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:07,522
<i>Nana only spoke
Italian to me.</i>

203
00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:11,244
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

204
00:10:13,560 --> 00:10:16,404
I love you, Nana. Whoa!

205
00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:17,606
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

206
00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,200
MILHOUSE: <i>Every time I
spoke English, she hit me.</i>

207
00:10:20,280 --> 00:10:22,248
Ow, that hurt!

208
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:23,725
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

209
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,202
I'm sorry I'm so stupid.

210
00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:28,522
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

211
00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,450
(GROANING)

212
00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:41,327
That's howl learned Italian
and started wetting my bed.

213
00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:45,485
Anyway, what do you say?
Can I be your <i>insegnante?</i>

214
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:47,767
Okay. If that
means "teacher."

215
00:10:47,840 --> 00:10:50,923
It means
"masculine teacher."

216
00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:57,922
Bye, ladies. You can
text message me anytime.

217
00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:00,082
We already did!
(GASPS)

218
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,571
MARGE: Ooh!

219
00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:06,762
Oh, how cute.

220
00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:09,010
(SNORING)

221
00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:11,970
He tried to stay up,
but he just couldn't make it.

222
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,241
(DOORBELL RINGS)

223
00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:19,089
<i>Buongiorno,</i> Millhouse.

224
00:11:19,160 --> 00:11:20,650
Ah, <i>perfetto.</i>

225
00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:25,448
(GIGGLES) Thank you. I've been studying.
I even made flash cards.

226
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:28,610
(GRUNTS)
(GASPS)

227
00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:30,321
My efforts!

228
00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:32,687
Oh, Lisa.
You don't learn Italian,

229
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:34,046
you live Italian!

230
00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,009
Come, we ride
to Little Italy.

231
00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:39,368
But first, Hake care of
some classroom business.

232
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:41,169
Lisa Simpson?
Present.

233
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:42,366
Let's go.

234
00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:54,522
(ALL SPEAKING ITALIAN)

235
00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:01,407
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

236
00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:06,364
One gelato for,
oh, the pretty girl.

237
00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:07,441
(CHUCKLES)

238
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,727
Ah, Mr. Milhouse,
thank goodness!

239
00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:13,407
Could you translate and help
me buy cheese for my lasagna?

240
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:16,006
But Luigi,
surely you speak Italian?

241
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:21,406
(SIGHS) No, l don’t. I only speak,
how you say, fractured English.

242
00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:23,801
That's what my parents
spoke at home.

243
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:29,924
I had a wonderful
time today.

244
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,162
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

245
00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:34,127
(GIGGLES)

246
00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:37,090
I'm the luckiest boy
in the world!

247
00:12:37,160 --> 00:12:38,924
Don't be in love,
stupid!

248
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,047
(GROANS)

249
00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:49,201
Tammy, I'd never
have the courage

250
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:51,487
to skydive if it
weren't for you girls.

251
00:12:51,560 --> 00:12:52,607
Thanks, Marge.

252
00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:55,809
And you know, when we land, we've
got a little surprise for ya.

253
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:59,681
Ooh. Well, now I really
hope my chute opens.

254
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:01,565
(WIND HOWLING)

255
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,047
Goodbye, cruel world!

256
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:07,326
Ladies.

257
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:13,086
Marge Simpson,
we hereby induct you

258
00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:16,050
as a full member
of the Cheery Red Tomatoes.

259
00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:17,526
(APPLAUSE)

260
00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:25,051
I feel a happiness
I've never felt.

261
00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:28,841
I not only have friends,
I have a hat to prove it.

262
00:13:28,920 --> 00:13:32,606
Now Marge, as a full member, you
get to share in all our secrets.

263
00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:34,648
Like our recipe
for mock apple pie.

264
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:37,121
The secret is it's got
apples in it.

265
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:40,363
And now we can tell you the
secret plans for our fundraiser.

266
00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:44,490
This year, we're gonna steal one
million dollars from Mr. Burns.

267
00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:47,803
(GASPS) You're joking!
You've gotta be joking!

268
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,090
You're not joking.

269
00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:00,364
Oh, any other surprises?

270
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:02,169
I'm not a natural redhead.

271
00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:03,891
(GROANS)

272
00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:10,966
I'm sorry. I can't steal.
Not even from Mr. Burns.

273
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:13,361
Mr. Burns promised
a million dollars

274
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,727
to the Springfield
Children's Hospital.

275
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,245
And then...

276
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:22,887
Instead of donating
this money,

277
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:25,361
I'm going to use it
to extend my own life

278
00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:27,442
another 10 minutes.

279
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:28,521
Smithers?

280
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:31,125
And the register?

281
00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:33,725
(CROWD BOOING)

282
00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:35,645
Release the hounds!

283
00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:37,080
(DOGS BARKING)
(CROWD SCREAMING)

284
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:41,929
Why would you bring attack
dogs to a charity event?

285
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,650
I was taking them
to the groomers.

286
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:44,721
(CHUCKLES)
(nos PANTING)

287
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:47,610
Who's a stinky dog?
You are.

288
00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:50,889
Michelle's going to work on you today.
Yes, she is.

289
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:55,690
There are 12 Faberge eggs in his
vault, each worth a small fortune.

290
00:14:57,560 --> 00:15:00,484
We can get them, but we
need your special skills.

291
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:04,201
When l joined, I never thought
we'd be robbing people.

292
00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:05,930
You said you wanted friends!

293
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,731
And the one thing about friends
is that they stick together!

294
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,929
Especially when they're trying to
pull off a million-dollar heist.

295
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,924
Maybe we were a little too
quick to give you that hat.

296
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:18,209
Take back the hail
She deserves bare hair!

297
00:15:18,280 --> 00:15:20,089
ALL: Bare hair! Bare hair!

298
00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:22,481
Okay, okay,
okay, I'm in!

299
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:23,891
You ladies doing
okay down there?

300
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:26,247
Sorry to wake you,
Stanley.

301
00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,681
Don't let us down,
newbie.

302
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:33,724
ANNOUNCER ON TV: <i>Welcome back to Fox
Sports West II Classic Fox Sports Fox.</i>

303
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,401
Hey, Marge,
where are you going?

304
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:38,521
Oh, heh...

305
00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:41,411
Well, I'm... (STAMMERS)
Bird watching.

306
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:45,121
Wait a minute.
If she's going bird watching,

307
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:47,601
<i>why did she leave our
Peterson's Field Guide to Birds</i>

308
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:48,886
on the kitchen counter?

309
00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:52,691
(GASPS)
Roadrunners are real!

310
00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:58,565
(SINGING) <i>Milhouse is teaching
me to speak so prettily</i>

311
00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:03,931
<i>I'll quip so wittily
when I'm in Italy</i>

312
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:05,841
(SIGHS)

313
00:16:06,880 --> 00:16:10,487
(GASPS) Milhouse,
just what is going on?

314
00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,130
Run along, Angelique.

315
00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:14,368
But not too fast, huh?

316
00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:15,681
(GROWLS)

317
00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:20,486
Lisa, Lisa,
she is the appetizer,

318
00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:22,767
but you are
the main course!

319
00:16:22,840 --> 00:16:24,410
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

320
00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:33,404
Lisa! You're speaking
perfect Italian!

321
00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:35,922
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

322
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:38,931
(LISA SHOUTING IN ITALIAN)
(MILHOUSE GROANING)

323
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:44,201
Now let's see
what Marge is up to.

324
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:47,610
(HOMER READING)

325
00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:51,521
(GASPS)

326
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:52,726
(READING)

327
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,570
That's Mr. Burns' mansion!

328
00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:04,484
Remind me, Smithers,
while we're out,

329
00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:06,050
I need to get
my eyes re-balled

330
00:17:06,120 --> 00:17:08,088
and my brain
flushed outwith vinegar.

331
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,640
Yes, sir. Oh, and your knees will
be back from the shop tomorrow.

332
00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:11,721
Excellent.

333
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:31,885
Okay, Marge. You're the only
one of us skinny enough

334
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:33,564
to squeeze through
this vent.

335
00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:35,688
That's my special skill?

336
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:38,286
Well, what'd you think?
You're a master of disguise?

337
00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:39,566
Not with that 'do.

338
00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:40,846
I thought
you liked my hair.

339
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:42,126
It's all right.

340
00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:50,851
I've gotta stop
Marge from doing

341
00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:52,684
something reckless
and irresponsible!

342
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:55,200
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

343
00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:00,286
Lou, we better go
after him.

344
00:18:00,360 --> 00:18:02,362
Eddie, you direct traffic.
You're the graceful one.

345
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:03,441
You got it, Chief.

346
00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:12,482
CLANCY: Look at him
tease that Subaru.

347
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:15,689
And that guy can't find a girlfriend.
I'll never figure it out.

348
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:19,084
I got the combination
from Burns

349
00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:21,931
after I let him feel me
up during the Depression.

350
00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:26,329
Zero to the right, zero to
the left, (DIAL CLICKING)

351
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,243
back to zero.

352
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:36,200
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)

353
00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:40,643
Marge, l wanted to save you from the cops.
But the cops followed me!

354
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:43,200
Game over, man!
Game over!

355
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:47,244
So are you gonna introduce
me to your friends?

356
00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:52,722
Don't worry, Mr. Burns. We'll
get to the bottom of this.

357
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:55,451
Excuse me, Lou.
I'm supposed to say that.

358
00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,126
Acting like the chief
doesn't make you the chief.

359
00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:01,642
If I was acting like the
chief, I'd need size 58 pants.

360
00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:02,960
Oh, here we go
with the fat jokes.

361
00:19:03,040 --> 00:19:04,849
You know, I just wish you
could hit the easy targets

362
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:06,445
on the firing range
so well.

363
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,451
Oh, Lou, why do we
hurt each other so?

364
00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:14,409
Because sometimes
it's easier to be cruel

365
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:16,448
than to say what
you really feel.

366
00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:19,005
Permission to hug, Chief?

367
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,489
Permission (SOBS) granted.

368
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:24,528
Granted, Lou!
Thank you, Chief!

369
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:25,880
Oh, enough!

370
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,364
While you morons
are canoodling,

371
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:30,249
someone's burgling
my miscellanea.

372
00:19:32,440 --> 00:19:33,441
(GUNSHOT)

373
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,531
Try to take my eggs,
will you?

374
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,967
Well, this rooster
has a beak.

375
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:42,362
A beak which calls out
death-a-doodle-doo.

376
00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:44,525
Why, you're all women.

377
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:45,965
I'm not.

378
00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:49,562
I suppose. But you're
certainly buxom and flirty.

379
00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,968
Oh, well, l try to
have a good time.

380
00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:56,005
All I wanted to do
was join a group

381
00:19:56,120 --> 00:19:58,566
of women who wore
the same outfits!

382
00:19:58,800 --> 00:19:59,926
(CRYING)

383
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:01,925
(ALL CRYING)

384
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:05,641
(SIGHS)

385
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:07,565
Oh, no jury on earth
would convict

386
00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:09,449
a bunch of
moist-eyed mothers.

387
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:11,244
I'll tell you
what, ladies.

388
00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:13,800
Give me my eggs back
and I'll let you go.

389
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:17,405
(SOBS)

390
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:20,324
And tell me I'm not fat!

391
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:21,481
(SCOFFS)

392
00:20:22,360 --> 00:20:25,170
Well, I guess our
fundraiser was a failure.

393
00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:27,483
Don't be so sure.

394
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:32,561
Ah, Marge, I love you.

395
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:33,971
But to be safe,
sweetie, I don't think

396
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,088
we can ever see
each other again.

397
00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:38,401
I'll really
miss you guys.

398
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:41,848
I'll never forget the three
activities we did together.

399
00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:43,001
(SNIFFLES)

400
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:45,481
Listen, Marge.

401
00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:47,528
No matter where you go
in this life,

402
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,210
you'll always have
one friend

403
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:51,282
who loves you,
body and soul.

404
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:57,803
And Marge,
there are certain things

405
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:01,282
I can do for you that
no other friend can.

406
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:03,044
Special things.

407
00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:04,685
(CHUCKLES)

408
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,928
Wow, this is special.

409
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,047
(THUDS)

410
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:17,686
I can't believe this
happened to me twice!
<b><font color="#0A7C32">Ripped By mstoll</font></b>

