1 00:00:02,877 --> 00:00:06,256 CHOIR: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:06,339 --> 00:00:09,467 {\an8}MARGE: And here's a marble for Lisa for cleaning her room, 3 00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:12,554 {\an8}and a marble for Bart for not trashing Lisa's room. 4 00:00:12,637 --> 00:00:14,097 {\an8}The jars are full, 5 00:00:14,180 --> 00:00:17,475 {\an8}so you've earned your Saturday Surprise Dad Day! 6 00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:18,727 {\an8}BOTH: Yay! 7 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:22,188 {\an8}This Saturday, from the dad who brought you cemetery paintball 8 00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:24,232 {\an8}and go-karts on real roads, 9 00:00:24,315 --> 00:00:26,568 {\an8}comes the greatest activity yet... 10 00:00:27,944 --> 00:00:30,572 {\an8}BOTH: Video game convention! 11 00:00:30,655 --> 00:00:32,824 {\an8}-(cameras clicking) -(murmuring) 12 00:00:34,909 --> 00:00:37,162 {\an8}(crowd gasps) 13 00:00:37,245 --> 00:00:38,955 {\an8}(crowd cheering) 14 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,457 {\an8}And check these out. 15 00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:42,333 {\an8}BOTH: VIP passes! 16 00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:44,753 {\an8}Is there any better feeling than cutting in line 17 00:00:44,836 --> 00:00:47,839 {\an8}because a plastic badge says you're special? 18 00:00:47,922 --> 00:00:49,507 {\an8}(drools) 19 00:00:49,591 --> 00:00:52,719 {\an8}(Bart and Lisa drool) 20 00:00:52,802 --> 00:00:54,554 {\an8}(all gasp) 21 00:00:54,637 --> 00:00:57,307 {\an8}-BART: GTS! -HOMER: So many games. 22 00:00:57,390 --> 00:00:59,017 -LISA: Ah. -HOMER: Wow. 23 00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:00,727 BART: Whoa. 24 00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:02,771 (gasps) W.O.K.?! 25 00:01:02,854 --> 00:01:04,898 HOMER: Ooh, the Flying Tomato. 26 00:01:04,981 --> 00:01:06,941 BART: Ah! TMTOLO! 27 00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:08,568 DL2L-to-D! 28 00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:11,571 Oh! ACSOL! HC1?! 29 00:01:11,654 --> 00:01:12,739 Whoa! 30 00:01:12,822 --> 00:01:15,492 Guts of War Two: Entrails of Intestinox! 31 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,038 {\an8}Colon slash! 32 00:01:20,121 --> 00:01:21,414 {\an8}Rectum kill! 33 00:01:21,498 --> 00:01:23,917 {\an8}We've made a game that'll reward the hardcore gamer 34 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,086 {\an8}with hundreds and hundreds of hours of-- 35 00:01:26,169 --> 00:01:28,004 {\an8}-Finished it. -Huh? 36 00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:30,423 {\an8}(fanfare plays) 37 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,759 {\an8}But working on this game cost me my marriage. 38 00:01:32,842 --> 00:01:34,803 {\an8}I-I have twins I've never met! 39 00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:38,264 {\an8}Well, when you meet them, tell them your game's too easy. 40 00:01:40,433 --> 00:01:43,895 {\an8}This game has all the best college marching bands. 41 00:01:43,978 --> 00:01:46,356 {\an8}From the precision footwork of Ohio State 42 00:01:46,439 --> 00:01:49,526 {\an8}to the lame, dead-on-arrival humor of Stanford. 43 00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:52,112 {\an8}-(crowd cheering on game) -("Stars and Stripes Forever" playing) 44 00:01:52,195 --> 00:01:54,489 {\an8}Uh-oh, I'm losing the crowd! 45 00:01:54,572 --> 00:01:56,032 {\an8}(grunting) 46 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,408 {\an8}GAME ANNOUNCER: Level cleared. 47 00:01:57,492 --> 00:01:59,661 Next level: study for chemistry test 48 00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:01,746 on 12-hour bus ride home. 49 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:02,956 (giggles) 50 00:02:03,039 --> 00:02:05,542 This is the funnest game ever! 51 00:02:06,417 --> 00:02:09,504 {\an8}Man, how many quarters does this game take? 52 00:02:09,587 --> 00:02:13,216 {\an8}Dad! Funtendo is unveiling their new system in three minutes, 53 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:14,676 {\an8}in Hall G! 54 00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:16,386 {\an8}And we're in Hall D. 55 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:19,139 {\an8}Three halls, three minutes. 56 00:02:20,431 --> 00:02:22,308 {\an8}No problem. 57 00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:28,982 {\an8}-HOMER: Out of my way! Move it! -(people screaming) 58 00:02:29,065 --> 00:02:31,568 {\an8}Geeks must yield to normals! 59 00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:32,777 {\an8}(grunts) 60 00:02:32,861 --> 00:02:34,737 {\an8}(panting heavily) 61 00:02:37,949 --> 00:02:39,534 {\an8}(cash register dings) 62 00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:41,578 {\an8}-(chewing) -(ascending beeps) 63 00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:44,164 {\an8}-Room's full. -HOMER: Hmm. 64 00:02:44,247 --> 00:02:45,915 {\an8}Aha! 65 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,208 {\an8}(laughs) 66 00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:48,960 {\an8}BOTH: Yay! 67 00:02:49,043 --> 00:02:50,670 {\an8}(fanfare plays) 68 00:02:50,753 --> 00:02:51,754 {\an8}Whoo-hoo! 69 00:02:53,089 --> 00:02:54,883 {\an8}-(humming) -(tires screech) 70 00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:56,342 {\an8}Conventions rock! 71 00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:57,635 {\an8}Fun Dad rocks! 72 00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:59,095 {\an8}I need a nap! 73 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:00,680 {\an8}(Bart and Lisa laugh) 74 00:03:00,763 --> 00:03:02,724 {\an8}You kids have had a big day. 75 00:03:02,807 --> 00:03:05,310 {\an8}Head up to the tub while I deflate your toys. 76 00:03:05,393 --> 00:03:07,520 {\an8}Save us, Fun Dad! 77 00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:08,813 {\an8}(laughter) 78 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:10,815 {\an8}(Rod and Todd grunt happily) 79 00:03:14,652 --> 00:03:17,447 {\an8}The kids sure had a good time with you. 80 00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:20,241 {\an8}Yeah, I was on today. 81 00:03:20,325 --> 00:03:22,410 {\an8}Scary on. 82 00:03:22,493 --> 00:03:24,829 {\an8}How come they never call me Fun Mom? 83 00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:27,373 {\an8}Look, honey, a family's like a team. 84 00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:30,919 {\an8}And on every team, you have the slam-dunking megastar 85 00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:33,004 {\an8}and the referee. 86 00:03:33,087 --> 00:03:34,255 {\an8}It's not fair. 87 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:38,843 {\an8}Moms want to be fun, but we're stuck with all the mom stuff. 88 00:03:38,927 --> 00:03:41,512 {\an8}Okay, okay, how about this-- 89 00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:45,642 {\an8}next week, you take the kids on a Saturday Surprise Dad Day. 90 00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:47,310 {\an8}What if... 91 00:03:47,393 --> 00:03:50,939 {\an8}we roll pennies and go to the dollar store? 92 00:03:51,022 --> 00:03:52,273 {\an8}That's good, Marge! 93 00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:54,859 {\an8}Get all the terrible ideas out of your system. 94 00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:56,361 {\an8}Oh. 95 00:03:57,403 --> 00:03:58,863 I've got it! 96 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:03,117 Your Saturday Surprise Mom Day is the X-Games! 97 00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:05,411 BOTH: Yay! X-Games! X-Games! 98 00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:07,455 All right! 99 00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:09,958 That isn't an "X," Mom. 100 00:04:10,041 --> 00:04:12,377 Welcome to the Cross Games, Simpsons. 101 00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:14,379 {\an8}A Christian fellowship expo! 102 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:16,047 {\an8}Are there at least games here? 103 00:04:16,130 --> 00:04:17,590 {\an8}Oh, no, "games" stands for 104 00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:20,927 {\an8}Gathering of American Messengers for Evangelical Sports. 105 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:22,387 {\an8}-Sports? -(chuckles) 106 00:04:22,470 --> 00:04:26,015 {\an8}"Sports" stands for Strict Parental Oversight Rather Than Sports. 107 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:28,268 {\an8}(both groan) 108 00:04:28,977 --> 00:04:32,021 Come on, kids, fun comes from inside. 109 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,148 It isn't about what we actually do. 110 00:04:34,232 --> 00:04:36,484 Yes, it is! That's all it is! 111 00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:38,820 You're right, you're right, you're right. Let's go. 112 00:04:38,903 --> 00:04:40,280 Thank the Lord! 113 00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:45,243 Two children to play debtors in the Parable of the Unjust Steward. 114 00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:48,204 All the other kids are at something called the X-Games. 115 00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:50,957 (Bart and Lisa groan) 116 00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,962 {\an8}I'm sorry, gang. I blew it. 117 00:04:56,045 --> 00:04:58,631 {\an8}(groans) I hate it when grown-ups call kids "gang." 118 00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:00,133 {\an8}Don't worry about it, Mom. 119 00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:02,969 {\an8}Dad will take us on a great outing next weekend. 120 00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:04,846 {\an8}(sighs) 121 00:05:04,929 --> 00:05:06,556 {\an8}(engine clanks, rattles) 122 00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:10,977 {\an8}Why do old squirrels always crawl into my engine to die? 123 00:05:11,060 --> 00:05:12,645 {\an8}(groans) 124 00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:15,815 {\an8}Guess we'll be making an unscheduled pit stop, gang. 125 00:05:15,898 --> 00:05:17,734 We're not a gang! Gangs are cool! 126 00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,360 (tires screech) 127 00:05:20,945 --> 00:05:23,823 -Uh, Mom, where are we? -Nowhere scary. 128 00:05:25,908 --> 00:05:27,702 (engine hissing) 129 00:05:27,785 --> 00:05:29,370 Everything's fine. 130 00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:31,789 We'll just wait here for the tow truck. 131 00:05:34,208 --> 00:05:36,377 That newborn has earrings! 132 00:05:40,715 --> 00:05:44,093 -Mom, we're hungry. -(groans) 133 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:48,222 I guess we could make a sprint for one of these local establishments. 134 00:05:50,099 --> 00:05:53,311 (Marge groaning) 135 00:05:55,980 --> 00:05:58,775 They're using pancakes as spoons. 136 00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:01,027 Ooh, let's see what else they do wrong. 137 00:06:05,573 --> 00:06:07,241 (groaning) 138 00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:09,577 Ew! Ugh! 139 00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:13,247 They're selling CDs in the restaurant! 140 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:16,042 -Back to the car! -What can I get you? 141 00:06:16,125 --> 00:06:18,669 Oh, I'll just have a side salad. 142 00:06:18,753 --> 00:06:20,797 We have no side salad. 143 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,882 -Back to the car! -Relax, Mom. 144 00:06:22,965 --> 00:06:25,301 -Be adventurous. -Yeah, just have fun. 145 00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:26,969 Dad would. 146 00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,639 (sighs) 147 00:06:29,722 --> 00:06:31,599 What's the craziest thing on the menu? 148 00:06:31,682 --> 00:06:33,893 (chuckles) She means the most authentic. 149 00:06:33,976 --> 00:06:36,062 Well, that would be 150 00:06:36,145 --> 00:06:37,897 {\an8}the Zelzel Minchet Aletcha Wat. 151 00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:41,484 -Then I'll have that! -(all gasp) 152 00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:47,698 Okay, Marge, you test-drove a convertible once, you can do this. 153 00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:55,081 (lively Ethiopian music playing) 154 00:06:55,164 --> 00:06:57,417 (taste buds gasping, murmuring excitedly) 155 00:07:00,878 --> 00:07:03,172 Holy casserole-y! 156 00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,715 That's good gloop! 157 00:07:05,633 --> 00:07:06,884 Mmm. Mmm. 158 00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:08,636 I wish I lived in Ethiopia! 159 00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:12,682 Exotic, vegetarian, 160 00:07:12,765 --> 00:07:14,809 I can mention it in a college essay. 161 00:07:14,892 --> 00:07:17,019 Mom, this is amazing! 162 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,188 (all chewing noisily) 163 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:21,190 Wait, wait, wait, what is she eating? 164 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:22,817 They've never served me that dish, 165 00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:24,986 and I wear indigenous beaded headgear. 166 00:07:25,069 --> 00:07:26,237 Oh, this? 167 00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:28,906 It's just a little Zelzel Minchet Aletcha Wat. 168 00:07:28,990 --> 00:07:30,241 It's all I ever eat here. 169 00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:33,536 (gasps) They have prepared her a dish 170 00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:37,248 -from the non-translated page! -(gasps) 171 00:07:37,331 --> 00:07:39,417 So grab a pancake and slurp some slop! 172 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:41,836 Foodies, heed my call! 173 00:07:41,919 --> 00:07:44,255 {\an8}Commence ripping and dipping! 174 00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:47,842 (all chewing noisily) 175 00:07:47,925 --> 00:07:50,344 So, did all of your cars break down? 176 00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:53,764 Mom, they're here on purpose. They're foodies. 177 00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:57,435 Indeed. Our passion is to seek out interesting foods, 178 00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,937 savor their exotic flavors, then blog about them. 179 00:08:00,021 --> 00:08:01,606 Yes. 180 00:08:01,689 --> 00:08:04,025 We discovered Korean barbecue in this town. 181 00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:06,444 Uh, before the Koreans? 182 00:08:06,527 --> 00:08:08,946 Oh, sure they cook it, but they don't get it. 183 00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:13,242 "When you stick a pancake into a friend's mouth, it's a goorsha." 184 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,203 Everybody goorsha! 185 00:08:15,286 --> 00:08:16,913 ALL: Goorsha! 186 00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:18,331 BART and LISA: Goorsha! Goorsha! Goorsha! Goorsha! 187 00:08:18,414 --> 00:08:20,041 -Goorsha! Goorsha! -Goorsha! Goorsha! 188 00:08:20,124 --> 00:08:22,835 -Goorsha! -Marge, the kids are acting ethnic! 189 00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:24,462 Relax, Homie. 190 00:08:24,545 --> 00:08:27,507 Have some leftover Galalalalalalalalah. 191 00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:28,883 (grunting) 192 00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:32,011 Oh, no. 193 00:08:32,094 --> 00:08:35,264 I don't eat anything new unless I've eaten it before. 194 00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,266 Aw, come on, Dad, be a foodie. 195 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,101 You're already a fatty and a drunkie. 196 00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:42,104 I don't want to think about food, I want to like it. 197 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:43,898 Why drive across town 198 00:08:43,981 --> 00:08:46,776 to savor a bowl of mystery mush 199 00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,778 when there's four different Krusty Burgers 200 00:08:48,861 --> 00:08:50,488 we can see from our house? 201 00:08:50,571 --> 00:08:53,574 Oh, and here's my favorite restaurant-- 202 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,034 La Fridge. 203 00:08:55,117 --> 00:08:58,621 It's open 24 hours a day and there's no dress code. 204 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,252 What kind of American man 205 00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:06,504 doesn't want to explore global food culture? 206 00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:08,297 And then brag about it on the Internet. 207 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,800 We should start our own food blog. 208 00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:14,762 (gasps) The Three Mouthketeers. 209 00:09:14,845 --> 00:09:16,264 Three? 210 00:09:16,347 --> 00:09:19,183 You mean, one, two... me? 211 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:23,479 (gasps, grunts) 212 00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:31,571 ♪ We're blogging a food blog ♪ 213 00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:34,407 ♪ Marge and Bart and Lisa ♪ 214 00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:36,492 ♪ As one now ♪ 215 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:39,287 ♪ We're having fun now ♪ 216 00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:41,998 ♪ Throwing down mad foodie game ♪ 217 00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:43,499 ♪ Knowing all the chefs' names ♪ 218 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:46,085 ♪ Rolling into K-town, bibimbap and bulgogi ♪ 219 00:09:46,168 --> 00:09:48,921 ♪ The hotties that I chill with sriracha and kimchi ♪ 220 00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:51,757 ♪ Give me house-made terrines, my duck is always confit ♪ 221 00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:54,260 ♪ I braise with a billion more BTUs than I need ♪ 222 00:09:54,343 --> 00:09:56,929 ♪ Cook Thanksgiving turkey in a trash bag, sous-vide ♪ 223 00:09:57,013 --> 00:10:00,016 ♪ A fumatore in Brindisi FedEx me salami ♪ 224 00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:02,768 ♪ Don't scoop gelato unless it's got umami ♪ 225 00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:05,521 ♪ I'll be frank like Bruni, ruthless like Reichl ♪ 226 00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:08,316 ♪ Wiley like Dufresne when I take the mic out ♪ 227 00:10:08,399 --> 00:10:09,692 ♪ Rhyme about radicchio ♪ 228 00:10:09,775 --> 00:10:10,943 ♪ Criticize Colicchio ♪ 229 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:12,570 ♪ Every pub is gastro ♪ 230 00:10:12,653 --> 00:10:14,071 ♪ All my beef carpaccio ♪ 231 00:10:14,155 --> 00:10:15,239 ♪ Throw it in the pho, yo ♪ 232 00:10:15,323 --> 00:10:16,991 ♪ And don't you call that pho pho ♪ 233 00:10:17,074 --> 00:10:18,909 ♪ Talk about broth-squirting dumplings ♪ 234 00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:20,411 ♪ Dumplings, dumplings, dumplings ♪ 235 00:10:20,494 --> 00:10:24,874 ♪ We're blogging a food blog ♪ 236 00:10:24,957 --> 00:10:28,711 ♪ Uploading pics with our Fun Mom ♪ 237 00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:31,839 ♪ Fun Mom, Fun Mom ♪ 238 00:10:35,134 --> 00:10:36,636 People are loving our list 239 00:10:36,719 --> 00:10:39,555 of Springfield's top 99 Afghan restaurants. 240 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:42,266 I feel bad for all those places that didn't make the cut. 241 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:45,269 All right, food nerds, reality check. 242 00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:48,689 All the food in those pictures is poop by now. 243 00:10:48,773 --> 00:10:51,651 Minds blown, you're welcome. 244 00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:53,235 Oh. 245 00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:55,905 I'll remind you kids what real fun is. 246 00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:58,616 Hey, hey, kids! (laughs) 247 00:10:58,699 --> 00:11:00,409 Krustyland has a new ride. 248 00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:01,994 The Eyeballs of Death. 249 00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:04,789 It only passed the safety panel by a three-to-two vote. 250 00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:06,999 And that third vote didn't come cheap. 251 00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:08,668 (laughs) 252 00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:12,088 And I've got tickets for the grand opening Saturday night. 253 00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:14,507 -Whoa! -(gasps) Cool. 254 00:11:14,590 --> 00:11:18,594 Uh, kids, don't forget about our special plans Saturday night. 255 00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,429 Oh, sorry, Dad. 256 00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:22,682 Our blog is so popular, we got an invitation 257 00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:25,351 to the most exclusive restaurant in town. 258 00:11:25,434 --> 00:11:27,269 Kent Brockman himself 259 00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:30,690 could only get a reservation at 5:30 or 9:30. 260 00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,234 (giggles) It's called El Chemistri, 261 00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:35,695 and they use science to make the food. 262 00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:40,783 Behold... pine needle sorbet. 263 00:11:40,866 --> 00:11:43,619 (moaning) 264 00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:46,122 Pine needle... sorbet? 265 00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:48,541 Pine needle sorbet? 266 00:11:48,624 --> 00:11:52,169 My kids do not eat sorbet-- they eat sherbet. 267 00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:53,713 And they pronounce it "sherbert," 268 00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:55,548 and they wish it was ice cream. 269 00:11:55,631 --> 00:11:58,134 Sorry, Dad, this is our thing now. 270 00:11:58,217 --> 00:12:00,010 Fine, blow off Fun Dad 271 00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:03,639 and go eat your walrus mustaches and deep-fried pixie wangs. 272 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:08,227 Don't be so jealous, Homie, 273 00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:11,731 just because the kids are finally having fun doing something with me. 274 00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:14,316 Aah! Jealous? Me? 275 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:15,693 (chortles) 276 00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:17,987 That is to laugh. 277 00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:19,697 The very idea. 278 00:12:19,780 --> 00:12:23,701 If anything... (laughs) 279 00:12:23,784 --> 00:12:26,328 -you're the one who's jealous. -Of what? 280 00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:29,331 Of how much fun I am to be around! 281 00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:31,709 (sobs) 282 00:12:31,792 --> 00:12:33,836 It's always a party 283 00:12:33,919 --> 00:12:36,130 with Fun Dad! 284 00:12:36,213 --> 00:12:38,174 (sobbing) 285 00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:43,888 Too sad to walk. 286 00:12:43,971 --> 00:12:47,933 Too sad and fun to walk. 287 00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:56,734 -What are you doing? -When I'm sad, 288 00:12:56,817 --> 00:12:58,944 I make baseball bats. 289 00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:02,615 Homie, I don't want you to feel excluded. 290 00:13:02,698 --> 00:13:05,785 Would you like to come with us to dinner at El Chemistri? 291 00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:09,497 Really? You'd let me in on your thing? 292 00:13:09,580 --> 00:13:12,082 Even though I think it's stupid? 293 00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:13,626 Of course. 294 00:13:13,709 --> 00:13:15,878 -Hand me that saw, Marge. -Why? 295 00:13:15,961 --> 00:13:18,422 When I'm happy, I make birdhouses. 296 00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:21,509 Kids, guess what. Mom invited me to your fancy dinner. 297 00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:22,927 -Cool. -Awesome! 298 00:13:23,010 --> 00:13:25,554 I guess Fun Dad is a foodie now. 299 00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:28,224 BOTH: Food Dad! Food Dad! Food Dad! 300 00:13:28,307 --> 00:13:29,809 (groans) 301 00:13:31,143 --> 00:13:33,145 (groaning) 302 00:13:34,688 --> 00:13:36,482 I'm food bad boy Tony Bourdain. 303 00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:38,984 There's nowhere I won't go and nothing I won't eat, 304 00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:40,611 as long as I'm paid in emeralds 305 00:13:40,694 --> 00:13:43,531 and my hotel room has a bidet that shoots warm champagne. 306 00:13:43,614 --> 00:13:45,491 I'm here at a Singapore street-food market 307 00:13:45,574 --> 00:13:48,410 with famous blogging family, the Three Mouthketeers. 308 00:13:48,494 --> 00:13:51,956 Marge, you've got to try some of this hang hir kuay chap. 309 00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:54,917 Ooh, triple spicy barbecued stingray 310 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,086 stuffed with pig organs. 311 00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:59,213 Fun Dad is a foodie now! 312 00:13:59,296 --> 00:14:01,131 (munching loudly) 313 00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:02,299 (swallows) 314 00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:05,302 This is my thing and always will be. 315 00:14:05,386 --> 00:14:07,930 (munching loudly) 316 00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:11,350 Food Dad! Food Dad! Food Dad! 317 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,398 Everything's more fun with Homer. 318 00:14:17,481 --> 00:14:19,859 (speaking faux Swedish) 319 00:14:28,367 --> 00:14:30,536 But this was all I had. 320 00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:33,289 BRITISH MAN: Stop your bloody whinging, Marge. 321 00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:35,124 Aah! Gordon Ramsay! 322 00:14:35,207 --> 00:14:37,334 You (bleep) it up, big blue, didn't you? 323 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:40,379 Why did you invite Homer? He stole your bloody thunder. 324 00:14:40,462 --> 00:14:43,632 You're not as (bleep) fun as him, and you never will be. 325 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:45,384 (crying) 326 00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:48,137 Darling, darling, crying's not fun. Homer's fun. 327 00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:51,056 -Now, get out of my dream. -It's my dream. 328 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,559 Not anymore it's not. Ramsay, awake. 329 00:14:54,351 --> 00:14:56,228 What in the hell was that? 330 00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:59,106 (gasps, sighs) 331 00:14:59,189 --> 00:15:02,484 Fun me. Fun me. Fun me. 332 00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:05,237 Kids, I was thinking, was it really such a great idea 333 00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:07,072 to invite your father to that dinner? 334 00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:09,950 Relax. Dad will be the life of the party. 335 00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:11,744 He'll be the fourth Mouthketeer. 336 00:15:11,827 --> 00:15:14,330 But there weren't four Musketeers. 337 00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:18,167 Yeah-huh. Athos, Porthos, Aramis, and d'Artagnan. 338 00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:20,836 D'Artagnan wasn't a Musketeer. 339 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:24,673 He only had a letter of introduction to the captain of the guards-- 340 00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:26,592 which he lost! 341 00:15:27,676 --> 00:15:30,012 You know, I'm pretty excited about this far-out dinner. 342 00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,264 -Maybe I'll like it. -Oh, I doubt it. 343 00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:35,017 You sit at communal tables full of hipsters. 344 00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,810 Well, actually, I've come around on hipsters. 345 00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:39,188 Takes a lot of guts to all wear the same hat. 346 00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,565 And the food will all be weird foams-- 347 00:15:41,649 --> 00:15:44,193 cooked with chemicals or served in a test tube. 348 00:15:44,276 --> 00:15:45,861 It's too crazy for you. 349 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,614 So it's weird. Don't worry, I'll make it fun. 350 00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:50,950 Yeah, you always do. 351 00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:53,035 Well, here's where to meet us. 352 00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:56,080 1501 W... 353 00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:58,290 East Oak Street. 354 00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:00,376 East Oak Street. Is that it? 355 00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:02,086 Uh... yes. 356 00:16:02,169 --> 00:16:03,754 Yes, East Oak Street. 357 00:16:03,837 --> 00:16:06,507 That's where you should go. See you there. 358 00:16:07,257 --> 00:16:09,176 Don't you judge me. 359 00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:12,054 Ah, save it for the sitter. 360 00:16:14,139 --> 00:16:15,641 Welcome to El Chemistri. 361 00:16:15,724 --> 00:16:17,935 Pease place these mints in your mouth, 362 00:16:18,018 --> 00:16:20,729 and when your table is ready, they will vibrate. 363 00:16:22,106 --> 00:16:23,816 Ooh. 364 00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:28,654 {\an8}(dog howling) 365 00:16:28,737 --> 00:16:31,031 Here it is-- 1501 East Oak. 366 00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:33,826 No name on the door-- very trendy. 367 00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:36,787 What do you want? 368 00:16:36,870 --> 00:16:39,623 Is this the chemical kitchen place where you do the crazy cooking? 369 00:16:39,707 --> 00:16:41,125 Quiet, man. 370 00:16:41,208 --> 00:16:43,377 The experience begins. 371 00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:46,213 Where's Dad? 372 00:16:46,296 --> 00:16:48,424 Uh... I don't know. 373 00:16:48,507 --> 00:16:50,259 Probably changed his mind 374 00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:51,969 and stopped off for doughnuts. 375 00:16:52,052 --> 00:16:53,721 (chuckles) 376 00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:58,809 Before you is a deconstructed Caesar salad-- 377 00:16:58,892 --> 00:17:01,395 romaine lettuce gel, egg yolk ice, 378 00:17:01,478 --> 00:17:03,939 crouton foam, and anchovy air. 379 00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,399 You eat it like this-- 380 00:17:05,482 --> 00:17:08,485 gel, ice, foam, air, foam, ice, gel, foam, air. 381 00:17:11,530 --> 00:17:14,700 Just like Marge said-- chemicals and test tubes. 382 00:17:14,783 --> 00:17:16,535 The open kitchen is a nice touch. 383 00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:19,079 I guess I'll get started before my family gets here. 384 00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:21,874 How much for a taste? You know, just to get me going. 385 00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:23,667 -50 bucks. -Ouch. 386 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,794 This place is fancy. 387 00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:27,963 The next course is Regret. 388 00:17:33,427 --> 00:17:35,012 (delighted moans) 389 00:17:36,138 --> 00:17:37,890 (moaning) 390 00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:40,017 (chuckling) Hipsters. 391 00:17:40,100 --> 00:17:41,977 Too cool for school. 392 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:44,313 You don't look like the kind of guy who does this. 393 00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:46,690 Well, my wife thinks it's too crazy for me, 394 00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:48,734 but I'm going to prove her wrong. 395 00:17:48,817 --> 00:17:51,987 (chuckles) I'm doing this for my family. 396 00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:02,998 All right, Breaking Baddies, drop the meth. 397 00:18:04,666 --> 00:18:06,335 Pick up the meth! Pick up the meth! 398 00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:09,505 (gasps) This better be dinner theater! 399 00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:12,716 And now, pork chops 100 ways. 400 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,927 (diners oohing) 401 00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:18,639 100 pork chops! 402 00:18:18,722 --> 00:18:20,849 I can't believe Dad is missing this. 403 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:24,144 Sure, your dad's great, but I'm fun, too. 404 00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:25,854 Look at me eat, huh? 405 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,190 (munching loudly) D'oh. D'oh. D'oh. 406 00:18:29,858 --> 00:18:32,694 Who am I kidding? I'm not enjoying this. 407 00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:35,072 Even the foam tastes like nothing. 408 00:18:35,155 --> 00:18:36,865 (sighs) I'm calling Homer. 409 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:38,325 (cell phone chimes) 410 00:18:38,408 --> 00:18:40,702 HOMER (on phone): Marge! This isn't a food restaurant! 411 00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,746 -It's a meth restaurant! -(gunshots) 412 00:18:42,830 --> 00:18:45,290 A meth-taurant! Aah! 413 00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:47,709 (gasps) Foodies, help me! 414 00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,128 My husband's in danger! 415 00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:52,256 -Oh, we can't leave now. -We haven't had the root vegetables 416 00:18:52,339 --> 00:18:54,716 cooked in the perfect vacuum of outer space. 417 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,344 They say you can't even understand parsnips 418 00:18:57,427 --> 00:18:59,471 until you had zero-g parsnips. 419 00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:01,390 (groans) 420 00:19:01,473 --> 00:19:03,600 How dare you walk out on me! 421 00:19:03,684 --> 00:19:05,853 Your dessert is in this doggie bag 422 00:19:05,936 --> 00:19:09,231 woven from the silk of a blueberry-fed spider. 423 00:19:09,314 --> 00:19:11,316 Take it and go! 424 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,277 -(sirens whooping) -(police radio chatter) 425 00:19:13,360 --> 00:19:14,695 Ah, shucks. 426 00:19:14,778 --> 00:19:17,823 We get the family dressed up to go to our favorite meth lab, 427 00:19:17,906 --> 00:19:19,741 and it's all raided out. 428 00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:22,077 -(children groan) -Oh, honey, 429 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:25,164 I always liked your home-cooked better anyways. 430 00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:26,540 Aw. 431 00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:28,876 Uh, where do you think you're going? 432 00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:32,045 A wife needs to tell her husband she was wrong. 433 00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:33,964 And in you go. 434 00:19:34,047 --> 00:19:35,841 (whimpering) 435 00:19:35,924 --> 00:19:37,467 Sorry. 436 00:19:37,551 --> 00:19:40,220 Everything you've done here has created problems. 437 00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:44,474 (grunts) 438 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:46,101 (gasps) I've got to save him. 439 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:48,979 (gasps) Ooh. My dessert. 440 00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:52,816 Eat deconstructed apple pie! 441 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:54,067 (grunts) 442 00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:55,777 (swallows) 443 00:19:55,861 --> 00:19:57,404 (sighs) 444 00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:05,454 {\an8}Merci, Maman, pour la tarte tatin à la mode. 445 00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:11,543 (sighs) 446 00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:16,798 Oh, Marge, 447 00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:19,760 you saved me from the danger you put me in. 448 00:20:19,843 --> 00:20:22,638 I am so happy and angry. 449 00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,223 I'm sorry. 450 00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:26,433 I guess I just wanted the kids to look at me 451 00:20:26,516 --> 00:20:28,894 -the way they look at you. -Aw. 452 00:20:28,977 --> 00:20:31,521 Wow, Mom! That was awesome. 453 00:20:31,605 --> 00:20:33,273 We ate mad-scientist food 454 00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:35,901 and broke up a meth lab in the same day. 455 00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:38,737 Fun Mom! Fun Mom! Fun Mom! 456 00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,535 Now, that's my kind of foam. 457 00:20:45,619 --> 00:20:47,120 This is nice. 458 00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,248 A family fun day. 459 00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:50,624 Here's 50 bucks. 460 00:20:50,707 --> 00:20:53,502 For the next two hours, I don't want to know you exist. 461 00:20:53,585 --> 00:20:55,003 (laughing) 462 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,130 Family fun day. 463 00:21:00,425 --> 00:21:03,595 {\an8}(lively Ethiopian music playing) 464 00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:15,691 {\an8}♪ We're bloggin' a food blog ♪ 465 00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:20,028 {\an8}♪ Settin' up accounts for our users ♪ 466 00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:22,698 {\an8}♪ Usin' computers ♪ 467 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,658 {\an8}♪ Post tweets every day ♪ 468 00:21:24,741 --> 00:21:27,327 {\an8}♪ Yo, yo, tweets every day, y'all ♪ 469 00:21:27,411 --> 00:21:28,912 {\an8}♪ Never give it four stars ♪ 470 00:21:28,996 --> 00:21:31,164 {\an8}♪ Ain't never give it four stars ♪ 471 00:21:31,248 --> 00:21:33,375 {\an8}♪ Maybe two, maybe three ♪ 472 00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:38,255 {\an8}♪ Moderatin' the comments ♪ 473 00:21:38,338 --> 00:21:42,718 {\an8}♪ Checkin' the page views, page views, page views ♪ 474 00:21:42,801 --> 00:21:44,594 {\an8}♪ Duck fat ♪ 475 00:21:44,678 --> 00:21:46,847 {\an8}♪ Truffle oil, yo, yo, yo ♪ 476 00:21:46,930 --> 00:21:49,349 {\an8}♪ My food is art, my food is art ♪ 477 00:21:49,433 --> 00:21:51,643 {\an8}♪ It comes right from the heart ♪ 478 00:21:51,727 --> 00:21:53,770 -(crowd murmuring) -Shh! 479 00:21:56,648 --> 00:21:59,985 {\an8}Subtitled by A. Vandelay