1 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:04,963 CHOIR: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:05,046 --> 00:00:06,506 (tires screech) 3 00:00:06,589 --> 00:00:08,341 (theme music playing) 4 00:00:08,425 --> 00:00:09,843 D'oh! 5 00:00:09,926 --> 00:00:12,178 -(tires screech) -(grunts) 6 00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:16,057 {\an8}(Homer grunts) 7 00:00:25,608 --> 00:00:27,277 {\an8}(snoring) 8 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,279 {\an8}(groans) 9 00:00:29,362 --> 00:00:31,197 {\an8}(humming) 10 00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:33,533 {\an8}(humming) 11 00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:37,704 {\an8}Well, if ain't my next-door neighbor, 12 00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:39,831 {\an8}-King Toot. -Moe. 13 00:00:39,914 --> 00:00:43,293 {\an8}How many times I got to tell you not to throw your trash in my dumpster? 14 00:00:43,376 --> 00:00:45,211 {\an8}Oh, come on, Szyslak. 15 00:00:45,295 --> 00:00:48,048 {\an8}I got to make space in the store for my new side business-- 16 00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:51,384 {\an8}a tanning salon that secretly has cameras in the beds, 17 00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:56,556 {\an8}which feeds into my website, www.tancams.com. 18 00:00:56,639 --> 00:00:58,892 {\an8}-That is registered. -Yeah, sounds great. 19 00:00:58,975 --> 00:01:01,186 {\an8}Maybe then you could afford to rent your own dumpster. 20 00:01:01,269 --> 00:01:04,981 {\an8}I like my current deal-- free... of... charge. 21 00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,775 {\an8}(clanging) 22 00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:08,193 {\an8}(grunting) 23 00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:10,820 {\an8}I'll eat your hair! 24 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:13,490 {\an8}-You call that a testicle kick? -(tires screech) 25 00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:15,492 {\an8}All right, you two, break it up. 26 00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:17,243 {\an8}Drive on, asphalt cowboy, 27 00:01:17,327 --> 00:01:19,829 {\an8}or I'll squeeze his brain out like an edamame. 28 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:21,247 {\an8}Eh, uh, a what? 29 00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:23,750 {\an8}Those beans you eat before your sushi comes. 30 00:01:23,833 --> 00:01:25,752 {\an8}Oh, salt peas. 31 00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,921 {\an8}I call them salt peas. 32 00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:31,007 {\an8}Look, Officer, after 20 years of being neighbors, 33 00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,717 {\an8}tempers sometimes flare up. 34 00:01:32,801 --> 00:01:34,177 {\an8}Moe's a good guy. 35 00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:37,388 {\an8}No, no, now, it's my fault. I'm a hothead. 36 00:01:37,472 --> 00:01:39,891 {\an8}I ain't got no beef with you, Toot. 37 00:01:39,974 --> 00:01:42,018 {\an8}(whispering) You better stay out of my dumpster. 38 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:46,022 {\an8}I've also been stealing the catalogs out of your mailbox. 39 00:01:46,106 --> 00:01:47,857 -(punching thudding) -(instruments clattering) 40 00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,943 (grunting) 41 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:54,030 (screaming) 42 00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,032 It's my dumpster! 43 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,118 (screaming continues) 44 00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:06,501 (both growl) 45 00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:11,172 And that's the terrifying tale of how the Quebec Nordiques became... 46 00:02:11,256 --> 00:02:14,008 the Colorado Avalanche. 47 00:02:14,717 --> 00:02:17,345 Oh, no! King Toot's is closed! 48 00:02:17,428 --> 00:02:20,098 Dad, you're going to have to take me to... 49 00:02:20,181 --> 00:02:22,433 the big box music store. 50 00:02:22,517 --> 00:02:24,811 Look at all these monstrosities. 51 00:02:24,894 --> 00:02:27,355 HOMER: Lisa, how many times have I told you 52 00:02:27,438 --> 00:02:29,858 to bow down to our corporate overlords? 53 00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:31,609 (Lisa groans) 54 00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:33,444 (doorbell dings) 55 00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:34,988 BOTH: Hmm. 56 00:02:35,071 --> 00:02:37,073 HOMER: It's like some kind of guitar central. 57 00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:41,077 Hmm. (groans) 58 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,746 Hmm. Hmm. 59 00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:46,124 Midlife crisis at 12 o'clock. 60 00:02:46,207 --> 00:02:47,584 Mm-hmm. 61 00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:49,586 Okay, let me guess, dude. 62 00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:52,005 You're an axman-- you're looking to score a new blade. 63 00:02:52,088 --> 00:02:53,798 "Stig." (chuckles) 64 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:56,092 You've got a name that's not a name. 65 00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:58,928 So what's your poison, bro? Les Paul? Straight up Gibson? 66 00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:00,930 No, no, no, classic Strat, am I right? 67 00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:03,224 Oh, I don't have what it takes to play guitar. 68 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:06,436 I mean, I'm no Joe Walsh in the brains department. 69 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:08,605 (chuckles) Who is? 70 00:03:08,688 --> 00:03:12,567 Look, you don't have the weak, womanly fingers of a guitar princess. 71 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:16,613 You, my friend, have the muscular stumps of a bass man. 72 00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:18,531 Try this on. 73 00:03:18,615 --> 00:03:20,450 (note plays loudly) 74 00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:24,287 What the rock? 75 00:03:24,370 --> 00:03:26,331 Now that was a lick. 76 00:03:26,414 --> 00:03:27,540 I did a lick? 77 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:28,791 Keep them coming. 78 00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,501 (notes repeating) 79 00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,295 Yes, now bob your head. 80 00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:35,006 Bob it, bob it, bob it. 81 00:03:35,089 --> 00:03:38,968 Dude, usually it takes years to learn such neck confidence. 82 00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,678 Now check this out. 83 00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:42,513 ♪ ♪ 84 00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:46,601 Oh, my God. 85 00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:48,519 I'm amazing. 86 00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,940 Dude, you're already one of the greatest bass players of all time. 87 00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:54,567 Okay. Now... 88 00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:56,527 Oh, how are you set for stage lights? 89 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:58,029 I'm not set at all. 90 00:03:58,112 --> 00:04:00,865 Ooh, what about gels? 91 00:04:00,949 --> 00:04:03,159 This is embarrassing to admit, Stig, 92 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,703 but I haven't even thought about gels. 93 00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:07,038 (Marge humming) 94 00:04:07,997 --> 00:04:11,125 -(bass playing loudly) -(gasps) 95 00:04:14,963 --> 00:04:16,130 (screams) 96 00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:19,550 What is that racket?! 97 00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:20,927 Music! 98 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:23,179 Beautiful music! 99 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,806 What?! 100 00:04:24,889 --> 00:04:26,557 Beautiful music, baby. 101 00:04:26,641 --> 00:04:28,226 The bass guitar? 102 00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:30,687 This doesn't really seem like you. 103 00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:31,896 Sure it is. 104 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:34,399 You know I've always loved laying things down. 105 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:37,026 -Grooves are just the latest. -(groans) 106 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,987 I feel a powerful connection 107 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:41,155 to the history of famous bass players. 108 00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:43,157 Like what's-his-name from The Who. 109 00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:45,118 Or that guy from Led Zeppelin 110 00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:47,203 who wasn't Page, Plant, or Bonham. 111 00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:49,914 Those are the only two I know for sure. 112 00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:52,750 It's so cool to have another musician in the family! 113 00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:55,670 Oh, yeah, and you know what the great thing is about music? 114 00:04:55,753 --> 00:04:58,006 It's so easy. 115 00:04:58,089 --> 00:05:00,383 Uh, well, to truly master an instrument 116 00:05:00,466 --> 00:05:03,261 -you'll need years of... -So easy. 117 00:05:04,053 --> 00:05:06,514 -(bass playing) -(gasping) 118 00:05:10,935 --> 00:05:13,438 -(siren wailing) -(gasps) 119 00:05:15,189 --> 00:05:16,691 (groans) 120 00:05:20,028 --> 00:05:22,113 (gasps) Oh! 121 00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:29,287 Ooh! 122 00:05:30,079 --> 00:05:31,956 (groaning) 123 00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:35,877 MARGE: I can't take it. 124 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,880 All Homer does is play that stupid bass. 125 00:05:38,963 --> 00:05:42,383 Doink, doink, doink, doink, doink, doink, doink. 126 00:05:42,467 --> 00:05:44,135 You're not alone, Marge. 127 00:05:44,218 --> 00:05:47,180 A man gets older, has a career, a few kids, 128 00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:49,474 and suddenly there's a hole in his life 129 00:05:49,557 --> 00:05:53,144 that can only be filled by jamming. 130 00:05:53,227 --> 00:05:55,438 For my Julius, it was the drums. 131 00:05:55,521 --> 00:05:57,523 Timothy has that awful guitar. 132 00:05:57,607 --> 00:05:59,817 Kirk just loves his keyboards. 133 00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:03,988 I never knew so many women suffered from extramarital jamming. 134 00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:06,657 Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. 135 00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:10,495 What if all the dads jammed together 136 00:06:10,578 --> 00:06:12,080 in a dad band?! 137 00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:14,374 That way they would play their horrible music 138 00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:16,501 in one garage at a time. 139 00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:18,586 Marge, you're a genius! 140 00:06:18,669 --> 00:06:20,463 This menu was right-- 141 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:23,841 good things do happen at 'Zerz. 142 00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:25,927 {\an8}♪ 'Zerz! ♪ 143 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,138 (cymbals clattering) 144 00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:30,807 I don't know, guys. 145 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,642 I'm not sure I'm feeling this. 146 00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:36,396 The bass is kind of known for being a solo instrument. 147 00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:38,356 What were our wives thinking? 148 00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:40,983 We probably don't even like the same tunes. 149 00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:44,362 On the count of three, everyone say their favorite kind of music. 150 00:06:44,445 --> 00:06:46,239 One, two, three... 151 00:06:46,322 --> 00:06:47,740 ALL: Hard-driving rock! 152 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:50,576 -(gasping) -Dads, let's jam! 153 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:55,331 (rock song playing) 154 00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,291 Garage bands rule! 155 00:07:00,670 --> 00:07:01,754 (gasps) 156 00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:04,590 I almost forgot the most important thing. 157 00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:21,524 (rock song playing) 158 00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:23,860 (song ends) 159 00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:25,695 Great practice, guys. 160 00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:27,864 What do you say we give it another six hours, 161 00:07:27,947 --> 00:07:29,615 then call it a day? 162 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:34,203 Excuse me, but my wife told me about your get-out-of-the-house band. 163 00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:36,622 And, uh, perhaps you need a singer? 164 00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:39,083 Oh, yeah, Apu, 165 00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:41,335 I'm sure you're a great singer. 166 00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:44,589 But the balance of the band is really delicate right now, 167 00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:48,342 and we're not really looking for a world music vibe. 168 00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:50,219 No disrespect to world music. 169 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:52,138 I love world music. 170 00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:55,808 No, no, I will sing the classic power ballad "Hopin' for a Dream" 171 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:59,729 by my favorite band from the 1980s, Sungazer. 172 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:03,566 (clears throat) Okay, here we go. 173 00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:06,777 ♪ When I close my eyes ♪ 174 00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:10,698 ♪ I wish that I could fantasize ♪ 175 00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:14,702 ♪ Pull a dream right out of the air ♪ 176 00:08:14,785 --> 00:08:18,331 ♪ Take a chance, turn it into a prayer ♪ 177 00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:22,710 That sounds nothing like terrible, terrible world music. 178 00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:25,630 Why is your voice different when you sing? 179 00:08:25,713 --> 00:08:28,799 It is because of all the years I spent at the Kwik-E-Mart... 180 00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:30,218 (rock song playing) 181 00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:32,220 ...where classic rock anthems were piped in 182 00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:33,763 on a never-ending loop. 183 00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:37,308 The endless repetition drove many clerks to madness. 184 00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:40,728 The only way to maintain my sanity 185 00:08:40,811 --> 00:08:44,482 was to sing along until it seemed like our voices were one. 186 00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:48,277 ♪ Hopin' for a dream ♪ 187 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:51,864 -♪ Hopin' ♪ -♪ Focus like a laser beam ♪ 188 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:55,618 ♪ I'll keep fighting till I want something great ♪ 189 00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:58,538 ♪ Hopin' for a dream ♪ 190 00:08:58,621 --> 00:08:59,997 (song ends) 191 00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:03,000 Guys, are you feeling this? Are you feeling this? 192 00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,545 -I'm feeling it. -I'm definitely feeling it. 193 00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:08,548 I felt something earlier, but I was afraid to bring it up. 194 00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:10,508 I think we all felt something. 195 00:09:10,591 --> 00:09:12,385 We are more than just a garage band 196 00:09:12,468 --> 00:09:15,012 desperate to do anything other than hang out with our families. 197 00:09:15,096 --> 00:09:17,515 We are now a cover band. 198 00:09:17,598 --> 00:09:20,393 And we shall be called... Covercraft. 199 00:09:20,476 --> 00:09:24,021 Because we play covers and this is our craft. 200 00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:27,275 -And it sounds like Hovercraft. -That was not my intent. 201 00:09:27,358 --> 00:09:29,527 Okay, Covercraft, hands in. 202 00:09:29,610 --> 00:09:32,029 -Cover... -ALL: Craft! 203 00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:41,163 R-O-K-C. 204 00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:43,791 (carnival music playing) 205 00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:52,300 (instruments tuning) 206 00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:57,096 Okay, this crowd is about to experience 207 00:09:57,179 --> 00:09:59,223 the special magic of the cover band, 208 00:09:59,307 --> 00:10:01,142 the thrill of live music 209 00:10:01,225 --> 00:10:03,853 without the fear of hearing anything new. 210 00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:05,730 -Hmm? -(sighs) 211 00:10:05,813 --> 00:10:07,607 Apu, what's wrong? 212 00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,483 What if-- What if I am no good? 213 00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:11,652 This is the Cabbage Festival, man. 214 00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,988 I-I don't know if I can face that crowd! 215 00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:15,323 (groans) 216 00:10:15,406 --> 00:10:17,491 Buddy, buddy. Think of it this way-- 217 00:10:17,575 --> 00:10:19,827 you're not singing in front of all those people, 218 00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:23,164 you're alone at the Kwik-E-Mart in the middle of the night. 219 00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:27,126 You just wear this onstage, and everything will be fine. 220 00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:28,919 (gasps) My uniform! 221 00:10:33,758 --> 00:10:36,510 All alone at the Kwik-E-Mart. 222 00:10:39,430 --> 00:10:40,973 ♪ ♪ 223 00:10:41,057 --> 00:10:44,018 ♪ When I close my eyes ♪ 224 00:10:44,101 --> 00:10:48,022 ♪ I wish that I could fantasize ♪ 225 00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:52,109 ♪ Pull a dream right out of the air ♪ 226 00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:55,905 ♪ Take a chance, turn it into a prayer ♪ 227 00:10:55,988 --> 00:11:00,159 ♪ Girl, you know I want to be the guy ♪ 228 00:11:00,242 --> 00:11:03,788 ♪ With a hunger burning deep inside ♪ 229 00:11:03,871 --> 00:11:07,792 ♪ Tonight I wish upon a falling star ♪ 230 00:11:07,875 --> 00:11:11,962 ♪ To discover what my yearnings are... ♪ 231 00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:16,759 Everyone loves you, Dad. 232 00:11:16,842 --> 00:11:18,719 You could become a famous rock star! 233 00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:21,305 Well, son, I do have the talent. 234 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:23,140 My mind is full of ideas 235 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:25,267 for great songs I could write... 236 00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:27,812 down the names of and then cover. 237 00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:29,522 But then I remember-- 238 00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:32,149 I'm just a regular guy, jamming with my buds. 239 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:33,526 Oh, sweetie. 240 00:11:33,609 --> 00:11:36,112 This band has brought out the best in you. 241 00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:39,323 Yeah, you really get that it's all about the music. 242 00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:41,784 Yep. t's all about the music. 243 00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:46,080 And it would take a pretty unforeseen development to change that. 244 00:11:46,163 --> 00:11:49,291 Pretty unforeseen... 245 00:11:52,128 --> 00:11:55,798 Gentlemen, I think we've found what we're looking for. 246 00:11:59,343 --> 00:12:01,595 HOMER: Guys, I really need your honesty here. 247 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:03,556 At the Squidport Senior Jamboree... 248 00:12:03,639 --> 00:12:06,100 was I too in the pocket? 249 00:12:06,183 --> 00:12:07,768 (Covercraft members gasp) 250 00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:09,895 KIRK: Freddy Freeman, Shredder Stevens, 251 00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:12,773 Nick Delacourt, and Peter D'Abbruzio-- 252 00:12:12,857 --> 00:12:16,193 you're four of the five guys from Sungazer! 253 00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:19,363 But where's your lead singer, Grant LeDavid? 254 00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:20,948 Uh, he passed away. 255 00:12:21,031 --> 00:12:23,367 -How? -(whispers) 256 00:12:23,451 --> 00:12:25,745 What kind of erotic asphyxiation? 257 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:27,955 -(whispers) -Oh... 258 00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:31,333 Apu, you're the only man on the entire Internet 259 00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:34,044 who's got the pure Sungazer sound. 260 00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:37,631 Will you be our new lead singer and join us on our stadium tour? 261 00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:39,383 ALL: Ooh! 262 00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:41,260 I think I can answer for Apu. 263 00:12:41,343 --> 00:12:44,305 He's flattered, but the small-time success of Covercraft 264 00:12:44,388 --> 00:12:46,390 is all that any of us have ever wanted. 265 00:12:46,474 --> 00:12:47,850 Uh, actually, I... 266 00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:50,811 Apu has a rich life here in Springfield-- 267 00:12:50,895 --> 00:12:52,688 a store full of great products, 268 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:54,565 a lovely him-type wife, 269 00:12:54,648 --> 00:12:56,317 and eight super kids-- 270 00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:59,570 Anoop, Sandeep, Nabendu, Gheet, 271 00:12:59,653 --> 00:13:02,907 Pria, Uma, Poonam, Sashi... 272 00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:04,950 Shut your mouth. I want to do it! I want to do it! 273 00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:07,661 I want to be a singer for a real rock band! 274 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,914 -SHREDDER STEVENS: Sun... -ALL: ...gazer! 275 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:17,004 Gotta say, I'm kind of jealous of Apu getting a break like that. 276 00:13:17,087 --> 00:13:18,214 Not me. 277 00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:19,757 I'm nothing but happy 278 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,426 that our friend is headed for fame and fortune. 279 00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:24,929 APU: Tonight we play Las Vegas-- 280 00:13:25,012 --> 00:13:28,474 and the theme of the casino is circus! 281 00:13:28,557 --> 00:13:31,185 Circus! Ha! 282 00:13:31,268 --> 00:13:34,688 (whimpers) I want his fame and fortune so much! 283 00:13:34,772 --> 00:13:38,192 Why must the Lords of Rock be so cruel?! 284 00:13:38,275 --> 00:13:40,861 (laughing) 285 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:43,614 Sammy Hagar? You're not dead. 286 00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:48,702 Damn it! I told you those jalapeño poppers had too much breading! 287 00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,246 Sorry, Señor Hagar. 288 00:13:50,329 --> 00:13:51,914 Nah, nah, nah, it's cool, man. 289 00:13:51,997 --> 00:13:53,374 I went to rock star heaven. 290 00:13:53,457 --> 00:13:57,586 And there was this great back patio with this sweet fire pit. 291 00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:00,381 If you had the right wristband-- which I did. 292 00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:01,966 (laughs) 293 00:14:05,052 --> 00:14:07,137 News story in aisle three? 294 00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:10,307 Local clerk, Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, 295 00:14:10,391 --> 00:14:12,893 is a dead ringer for a dead singer. 296 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,104 He's living the rock star dream 297 00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:17,898 as front man for '80s chart-toppers Sungazer 298 00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:20,901 on their Last Final Hell Re-Freezes Over 299 00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:23,320 Ultimate Good-bye For Serious This Time 300 00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:26,198 Never Again Part Two of Question Mark Tour. 301 00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:28,576 Apu and the band appeared on Saturday Night Live 302 00:14:28,659 --> 00:14:30,369 as the punch line in a game show sketch. 303 00:14:30,452 --> 00:14:33,497 -What's a game show? -Something you make sketches about. 304 00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:35,165 KENT BROCKMAN: It looks like Apu won't be playing 305 00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:38,168 the Cabbage Festival ever again. 306 00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:43,132 Dad, you shouldn't be jealous of Apu. 307 00:14:43,215 --> 00:14:45,384 Remember, it's all about the music. 308 00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:47,761 I'm not jealous. I'm envious. 309 00:14:47,845 --> 00:14:50,472 Jealousy is when you worry someone will take what you have. 310 00:14:50,556 --> 00:14:52,600 Envy is wanting what someone else has. 311 00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:54,894 What I feel is envy. 312 00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:56,270 Hmm. 313 00:14:56,353 --> 00:14:58,689 -Wow, he's right. -You know what? 314 00:14:58,772 --> 00:15:01,817 Apu leaving is the best thing that ever happened to this band. 315 00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:05,654 We're gonna be like Genesis after Peter Gabriel left. 316 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,948 You mean more popular but not as good? 317 00:15:08,032 --> 00:15:10,576 Phil Collins-era Genesis is not as good, huh? 318 00:15:10,659 --> 00:15:12,912 "No Reply at All," "Land of Confusion," 319 00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:15,080 "Throwing it All Away," "Illegal Alien," 320 00:15:15,164 --> 00:15:18,667 "I Can't Dance," and I'm sure I don't need to mention... 321 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,045 "Invisible Touch"! 322 00:15:21,128 --> 00:15:22,254 Hmph! 323 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:26,258 (Covercraft playing) 324 00:15:30,387 --> 00:15:32,264 (grunts) 325 00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:35,935 You know, we really could use a new lead singer. 326 00:15:36,018 --> 00:15:38,270 You know, I've been known to sing a little. 327 00:15:38,354 --> 00:15:41,023 What? So you can also get famous and bail on us? 328 00:15:41,106 --> 00:15:42,191 You're out of the band! 329 00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:44,318 Well, you can't just kick him out. 330 00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:47,571 Oh, so you're sticking up for Yoko here? 331 00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:50,366 Looks like I've got another Yoko on my hands. 332 00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:52,034 How can there be two Yokos? 333 00:15:52,117 --> 00:15:55,204 Yoko! Yoko! Yoko! Yoko! Yoko! 334 00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:57,706 All you Yokos are out of the band! 335 00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,750 (grumbling) 336 00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:08,550 -Are you okay? -Do I sound okay? 337 00:16:08,634 --> 00:16:10,094 You sound great! 338 00:16:10,177 --> 00:16:13,222 Your licks are really... juicy. 339 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:15,307 They're not juicy. My licks are dry. 340 00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:17,226 Dry and scratchy like a cat's tongue. 341 00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:21,146 You didn't join a band to become famous like in Almost Famous. 342 00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,148 You loved playing music with your friends. 343 00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:24,900 That was enough to make you happy. 344 00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,819 Well, it's not enough anymore. 345 00:16:26,902 --> 00:16:28,988 When something great happens to one person, 346 00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:31,115 everyone else's life gets a little worse. 347 00:16:31,198 --> 00:16:33,075 Look it up, it's called physics. 348 00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:34,743 Apu is a good man. 349 00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,997 He sent over front row tickets and backstage passes 350 00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:40,416 to his show at the Costington Center. 351 00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:42,751 Oh, you mean he generously invited us 352 00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:44,670 to come watch him be a rock star? 353 00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:46,964 Stop feeling sorry for yourself. 354 00:16:47,047 --> 00:16:49,174 Your friend had a wonderful thing happen to him, 355 00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:52,428 and you are coming with us to share in his talent. 356 00:16:52,511 --> 00:16:54,388 I'll never have a per diem. 357 00:16:54,471 --> 00:16:56,306 You don't know what a per diem is. 358 00:16:56,390 --> 00:16:57,599 Still want one. 359 00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:01,145 Hmph. 360 00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:12,197 Hmph. 361 00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:15,367 Hmph. 362 00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:19,371 Apu wouldn't be able to sing a note 363 00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:21,623 if I didn't help him get over his stage fright 364 00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:23,500 with his Kwik-E-Mart shirt. 365 00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:26,086 (gasps) Backstage pass, 366 00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:29,590 you just became a payback rage pass. 367 00:17:39,808 --> 00:17:42,186 Look at all this rock star dressing room stuff. 368 00:17:42,269 --> 00:17:43,604 What a sellout. 369 00:17:43,687 --> 00:17:44,855 Cheese plate... 370 00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:47,274 Oh, sorry, cubed cheese plate. 371 00:17:47,357 --> 00:17:51,111 Lemon tea, probably for his throat. 372 00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:52,613 Mm-hmm! 373 00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:56,492 Let's see how he performs in front of all those people 374 00:17:56,575 --> 00:17:59,536 without his magic-people- performing-in-front-of shirt. 375 00:18:00,454 --> 00:18:02,206 -(door opens) -(gasps) 376 00:18:02,289 --> 00:18:04,416 But, Mr. Shredder, you promised me 377 00:18:04,500 --> 00:18:07,044 after we played my hometown I could have a day off. 378 00:18:07,127 --> 00:18:09,004 I also promised I'd kick heroin. 379 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,214 Hmm? 380 00:18:10,297 --> 00:18:12,549 But the tour is so hard on my family. 381 00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:15,719 My octuplets are being raised by roadies and bodyguards. 382 00:18:15,803 --> 00:18:17,888 This is not proper. 383 00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:21,141 Look, Apu, for 25 years we wasted money 384 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:22,810 on women, drugs, 385 00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:25,145 and guitars with live fish inside. 386 00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:27,356 And now we want to keep it going. 387 00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:29,691 You signed a contract for a three-year, 388 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:32,402 57-country tour at union scale-- 389 00:18:32,486 --> 00:18:34,071 no per diem. 390 00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:36,740 -(gasps softly) -You're in �oq��i9�s��w�4�[zb�!�S��De2�l �036��8{#;C��KR갃��%�E�C��,�7��oyJ[p��nt.�t��۩��/ Lm㎛66��~��u� ��N�e8��Srkz�f:1h8�DBsh��'��-7_�hN�T�-��d�uG�3�(z;�z�:n��Q<�v��L\뤨��w� �96+yы��*�іo�.��:��Hz��(g͖��&��l��N�Bv��_�FҐ�ŗ��s��"��Z��J!0��^u�v��;��x��ࠊT�4�wsq��[�k � f��{ڼԔ?�m��S*�_ -ƪ�*w�y/02��<�C�� >��3�3�.��yiQP-� Ǣ�E �h��-Ũ��mv蹕(O}��_K� %�(�T�q�� @�9��'��M˝��#v�q0C~�j�.�4��GE䳗��xWqd*ig��`9�&,��-�K��0�]�m��RR-Āg� �6�ںj�:�a��R�A�(�;/�>.�f%�p��1��ԣ�:�)i��ɯNx:�fZ j0^H7�[�c��~��O�h��Q&Ruh-Z�se6�_�I�l�p[FJ)Ēd�DMxb�mD>|�S��9��EpO��<��:�)nw��u�f�p�|v뻗Y�B!�� -��E�C�LZ��&�Ҷǳ|6 R7�贽��d�� k��?��1.ˮH�^*L��g�>@.K�QH�=��L�S��h�>�{&ڪ��#�*WE3� �T�,�0=A��D�W�z�/i.��Y��i�m��|y�dʢ�EPƞ�{�uK݄o�.�"��f��xb�+��L_��J�`B�+ *DeQq�]�N19�鉛� �#}>@�h�T3V��$�e��JV��?��m�XZ_g��=��mm+�^��WP��SXqSh;W��/VF��i&eX��$�aD{�3�a_��r�Q��\�B��Č�P�O��#J3Е?p�!�ׇ�ݙ[:Ađ�� Ȋ�x��fyRz�56T��5��$4.u�X��㥙�0K�H�C��-�G�$��1&��Xh��g&��o�.��K��y �*"d��&�I�`,o�[H�v��qa�}�'�j�<��* F)�n;^!�F:��c��ُ?��=om1��U<�H̜+��3`L�ʭT��X�0uB��{Axs� ��?Sj��@��M*7��Q@��i\S?�\��hѶuɹ�|�@h6o��o�g��n/ֻ{��ŧc�d��&_1�۬�� 7Uݧ,� Ky��_��HY+�\�@NYp��̋��=�� e�B�`Zh�āA��z�P�d�ʇ`L��,�qY�V#{#z�{x- ��l�x�1�� 8L�� 8��H��R-M�`$M��̵a�W��+-XK�^�@8ײ�k��r~�{l�ݐ��`v��+��HQ�.X#\��W.�K�T��fK��Έ��0b�8��)]�r��gm+��G��{K��_�Q�� K=a��L�Z4��{��&>@d��$/ݔ��(U��g�4��u��W`1�G��Y�� (��W�f��]��-E!C6�Kp`� E��q� ժ*p��[�j�"��i�:��]�D��7�N� ��);�F`_٠ C[��5��(f>>��7��6�aE��_�4��JJ�B ӗ5c�q��N@.#�M��=3�:܎J^w�"��G�c.��^��٤��-�7h��f� �ǗhQ��r.U�`��S�o.��i�H�]P��1ސ1w��ׅ[\�'�)�my{F�)vb�L~b�0x��P:�;�e��u��$��j��;l��J-�q��6�b��wT��$�?��{�N)cUB��r��%�Z�*�(/��?�{FވIg��O��|��x�r~�R1�H*{'edQ�� D��KG�-d>�)�k�� O�A��-��!榭�c0j{ŭ$��Fb��u��Q�K��,��l��ͧE��e;��QH�Yw��y�֡ܲ��w;&��D��:��y�v��T��sEs=ng�i1B��^�ѱ��k�h�ʦ�`�@7��s�U'��`��LfݑK�8ɪ�?�I9��8��Kٮ 1��I�h��s�oϖ ��NDM�:��'m�yh��ǟ��yո [��jợ��"PN>��x�Uy��Շt�@hrNIc�$��z ��_<�V?��>㦑��Ĵ��A��+huI+C�JRN�A��0�ʐ��xc�j�j�U��'5�e �T[��e�� J��]�8Lem�c��~b�|�L�[��GT��+� A� �_�KZi&��!��RQ��=�l��j�0K4P��2I��횝*_XrT��{�4~+x��&"��zfŚ��8�P��(`��5N�wp�֩�� ~28�P�\�#1 �EL��"��i ��fz��Մ�C�q�y��T��*I��6QI��a��Y�*� M�Q_�Zv��È�'f��/�:ϥqg�5�|�2::��a�C�<'tѻw�s$"�X��X�SA�]��m�k]�z\�<-�� W!��z��r�5H]{NG�r�G|J��}��K��$��g�3�KF0C�b�F��'E~[ ��L��z�%ܦE![Z#�c�V=�"��Tz��oa��|��0*q]�'k�k�Fa�zÊGS�$�]��5��e�p��8�v��N]e��]��.Օ۹��΃"9��? 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