1
00:00:04,072 --> 00:00:06,640
Stick close by, kids,
and I'll explain everything

2
00:00:06,674 --> 00:00:08,676
you need to know
about the briny deep.

3
00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:11,212
I want to see a giant squid
attack a sperm whale

4
00:00:11,245 --> 00:00:12,680
and battle to the death.

5
00:00:12,713 --> 00:00:14,548
I want to swim free
with the fishes.

6
00:00:14,582 --> 00:00:16,550
I brought
my lucky red swim trunks.

7
00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:18,686
All right, can the chatter
and listen up.

8
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:21,089
Here we have
the hideous moray eel.

9
00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:25,159
And over here, we have the tasty
but repulsive sea bass.

10
00:00:25,193 --> 00:00:27,728
Yuck! What the hell is that?

11
00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:29,397
-Bart!
-(gurgling): Come on in.

12
00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:31,065
The water's fine.

13
00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:34,902
Boy, you come out of that tank
right now!

14
00:00:34,935 --> 00:00:36,537
Do some tricks, Bart.

15
00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:38,539
-Oh!
-Stop that.

16
00:00:38,572 --> 00:00:40,741
It only encourages him.

17
00:00:40,774 --> 00:00:43,043
Ah!

18
00:00:43,077 --> 00:00:45,045
Dad, you got to see this!

19
00:00:45,079 --> 00:00:46,914
(Homer screams)

20
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:52,420
* The Simpsons *

21
00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:54,054
(audio rewinds)

22
00:00:54,088 --> 00:00:56,457
* The Simpso... *

23
00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:58,058
(audio rewinds)

24
00:00:58,092 --> 00:01:00,928
* The Simpsons *

25
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,000
(exclaims)

26
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:21,081
(school bell rings)

27
00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:23,951
(burps)

28
00:01:23,984 --> 00:01:25,919
(whistle blows)

29
00:01:25,953 --> 00:01:27,788
LENNY:
Oh, not again!

30
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:33,427
(beeps)

31
00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:38,799
*

32
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:40,801
(playing lively jazz music)

33
00:01:43,871 --> 00:01:45,473
(Largo grunts)

34
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,281
(chuckles)
I nailed it.

35
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:55,783
I have tears in my eyes,

36
00:01:55,816 --> 00:01:59,019
like when I saw David
Attenborough's Blue Planet.

37
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:00,854
Did you really watch them all?

38
00:02:00,888 --> 00:02:02,923
Well, most of the first one.

39
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:05,326
-LARGO: Lisa?
-Yes, Mr. Largo?

40
00:02:05,359 --> 00:02:08,529
-I just want to say...
-And I just want to listen.

41
00:02:08,562 --> 00:02:10,164
RALPH:
I'm a tuna!

42
00:02:10,198 --> 00:02:11,999
You really should give up
the saxophone.

43
00:02:12,032 --> 00:02:13,301
What?!

44
00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:15,035
Oh, I know. I know.
You're fabulous.

45
00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:16,837
Well, then I shouldn't
give it up.

46
00:02:16,870 --> 00:02:18,972
I mean, what would you say
if I said

47
00:02:19,006 --> 00:02:20,508
you had to give up
teaching music?

48
00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:21,942
I'd say, "Hallelujah!"

49
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:25,078
I could go back to my first
love: not teaching music.

50
00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:29,850
We can't do the couch gag.
When is Lisa gonna get here?

51
00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:31,552
Worry about yourself.

52
00:02:35,323 --> 00:02:38,392
Why would you ask me
to give up the saxophone?

53
00:02:38,426 --> 00:02:39,860
Lisa, sweetie, I'm afraid

54
00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:41,729
this world is filled
with Lisa Simpsons.

55
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:43,864
-Huh?
-Bright, talented

56
00:02:43,897 --> 00:02:46,133
and doomed to disappointment.

57
00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,369
What you're saying is horrible.

58
00:02:48,402 --> 00:02:51,405
It's horrible. (crying)

59
00:02:51,439 --> 00:02:53,641
Mr. Largo,
what is going on here?

60
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:55,376
I'm trying
to encourage a student

61
00:02:55,409 --> 00:02:57,077
to give up on her dreams!

62
00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:59,079
You're crushing it
as always, Dewey.

63
00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:02,049
-(Lisa cries)
-I'll take it from here.

64
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:04,051
Now, Lisa,
this is for your own good.

65
00:03:04,084 --> 00:03:07,221
For every Yo-Yo Ma,
there's a million Ma-Ma Yos.

66
00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:08,822
And for every Shaun White,

67
00:03:08,856 --> 00:03:10,758
there are a million
White Shauns.

68
00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:12,526
And for every Albert Einstein,

69
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,028
there are a million
Herman Schmidbergs.

70
00:03:15,062 --> 00:03:17,265
Okay, so maybe
I'll never be great,

71
00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:19,233
but shouldn't I try?

72
00:03:19,267 --> 00:03:20,768
(chuckles) No.

73
00:03:20,801 --> 00:03:23,604
(crying)

74
00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:25,939
(kids chattering playfully)

75
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:34,448
(laughter)

76
00:03:34,482 --> 00:03:37,017
Sleeping people are my canvas.

77
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,419
(whimpers)

78
00:03:38,452 --> 00:03:41,555
That's some cutting satire,
Simpson.

79
00:03:41,589 --> 00:03:44,224
Yeah. Check out Bill Maher
over here.

80
00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:45,759
(whimpers)

81
00:03:45,793 --> 00:03:47,227
Ay, caramba!

82
00:03:47,261 --> 00:03:49,297
Let's see. Little Bo Peep?

83
00:03:49,330 --> 00:03:51,299
That'll traumatize him good.

84
00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:54,134
Oh, I got it, the perfect one.

85
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:56,370
No, not that.
Anything but that!

86
00:03:56,404 --> 00:03:58,138
Oh, thanks for your input.

87
00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:00,173
I'll try to come up
with an alternative.

88
00:04:01,675 --> 00:04:03,243
Put it on.

89
00:04:03,277 --> 00:04:04,578
-(door opens)
-JIMBO: Get in there.

90
00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:05,579
(kids gasp)

91
00:04:05,613 --> 00:04:09,149
(laughter)

92
00:04:09,182 --> 00:04:11,251
Sing like we rehearsed!

93
00:04:11,285 --> 00:04:14,588
* The sun'll come out
tomorrow... *

94
00:04:14,622 --> 00:04:15,989
More pep!

95
00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:19,159
* Bet your bottom dollar
that tomorrow *

96
00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:21,161
* There'll be sun! *

97
00:04:21,194 --> 00:04:24,131
Sing until food fills
your mouth!

98
00:04:24,164 --> 00:04:26,667
* Tomorrow, tomorrow *

99
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:29,503
(gagging):
* I love ya tomorrow! *

100
00:04:29,537 --> 00:04:33,240
(muffled):
* You're always a day away. *

101
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,275
Now get the Wite-Out.

102
00:04:38,446 --> 00:04:40,481
Leapin' lizards!

103
00:04:40,514 --> 00:04:42,182
He's right.

104
00:04:42,215 --> 00:04:44,352
I know it's true. I always have.

105
00:04:44,385 --> 00:04:46,354
Honey, ignore everyone,

106
00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:49,790
and listen to someone objective:
your mother.

107
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:51,425
You're great!

108
00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:53,961
It's too late.
I'm quitting music.

109
00:04:53,994 --> 00:04:55,696
There's a microscope
in there, too.

110
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:57,197
You can sell it.

111
00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:58,999
Don't give up your dream.

112
00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:02,603
When I was little, I dreamed
about marrying a dashing prince,

113
00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:04,772
and it actually happened!

114
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:06,674
You were married before Dad?

115
00:05:06,707 --> 00:05:08,709
No! I mean your father.

116
00:05:08,742 --> 00:05:11,812
My father.
So that's Homer, or...

117
00:05:11,845 --> 00:05:13,847
There's no "or"!

118
00:05:13,881 --> 00:05:16,950
You can't let someone else's
opinion tear you down.

119
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:19,052
I want to hear your sweet music,

120
00:05:19,086 --> 00:05:23,323
so suck it in
and get downstairs right now!

121
00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:25,626
You're the best.
You're the best.

122
00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:27,361
Herman Schmidberg!

123
00:05:27,395 --> 00:05:30,197
-For the love of jazz?
-(gasps)

124
00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:32,332
(dramatic musical sting)

125
00:05:32,366 --> 00:05:34,735
(playing off-key)

126
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,904
I can't play! I just can't!

127
00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:39,740
It's in my head,
but my hands won't do it!

128
00:05:41,609 --> 00:05:43,143
What's with her?

129
00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:45,546
(dramatic musical sting)

130
00:05:45,579 --> 00:05:47,314
Woo-hoo! Whoa!

131
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,249
I'm suffering from beer-tigo!

132
00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:51,552
Whoa! (giggles)

133
00:05:51,585 --> 00:05:54,087
You don't have to worry
about what's wrong with you.

134
00:05:54,121 --> 00:05:57,090
Just find out whatever it is,
and you can fix it.

135
00:05:57,124 --> 00:05:59,727
ADHD? No, that's Bart.

136
00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:02,095
OCD? No, that's Mom.

137
00:06:02,129 --> 00:06:04,498
This one's Dad.
This one's Dad.

138
00:06:04,532 --> 00:06:07,200
This one's Dad. This one's Dad.

139
00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:09,403
What is the name
when you can't perform something

140
00:06:09,437 --> 00:06:13,240
that you've practiced four times
a week since you were three?!

141
00:06:13,273 --> 00:06:16,076
MAN (over video): The yips,
named for Dr. Augustus Yip.

142
00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:17,911
A mysterious
psychological condition

143
00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:21,582
where well-rehearsed skills
suddenly become impossible.

144
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:26,053
Like all mental disorders,
the yips are likely incurable.

145
00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,588
Oh, for God's sake.

146
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,994
The yips. I have the yips!

147
00:06:35,328 --> 00:06:38,098
Bart, what happened
to your pupils?

148
00:06:38,131 --> 00:06:40,468
They're Annie'd, okay?

149
00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:43,036
MARGE: Lisa, you want
to play some more?

150
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:44,672
No!

151
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,776
(sighs)

152
00:06:48,809 --> 00:06:50,878
(Lisa crying)

153
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,280
Lisa, honey, are you okay?

154
00:06:53,313 --> 00:06:56,149
You barely touched
your green disgustos.

155
00:06:56,183 --> 00:06:58,418
Some nights, there's isn't
enough kale in the world

156
00:06:58,452 --> 00:07:00,387
to brighten a girl's mood.

157
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:03,323
(laughs)
Oh, that's a good one!

158
00:07:03,356 --> 00:07:05,459
-Don't you dare.
-Okay.

159
00:07:05,493 --> 00:07:06,994
I have some news.

160
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:09,329
My great half step-aunt
Eunice Bouvier

161
00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:13,934
is turning 100 years old,
and she wants us there.

162
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:15,969
Is this the aunt
who lives in Florida?

163
00:07:16,003 --> 00:07:19,507
It's not just Florida.
It's Gainesville!

164
00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:21,241
I only have two weeks vacation,

165
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,243
and I have to spend 'em
in Dullsville?

166
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,278
Gainesville.
If we have time,

167
00:07:25,312 --> 00:07:27,414
we'll take a day trip
to Dullsville.

168
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:28,916
HOMER, LISA and BART:
Oh!

169
00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:30,984
It's my turn
to pick the vacation!

170
00:07:31,018 --> 00:07:32,953
Also, she loves music,

171
00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:35,623
so I'm sure she'd like
Lisa to play for her.

172
00:07:35,656 --> 00:07:37,024
Stop it!

173
00:07:37,057 --> 00:07:40,027
Fine.
The Simpsons are going to...

174
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:41,795
Oh, I can't say it.

175
00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:43,597
Gainesville.

176
00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:47,835
* I was born
in Gainesville, Florida *

177
00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:51,004
* And my father *

178
00:07:51,038 --> 00:07:54,141
* Was a tailor *

179
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:57,177
* And my mother *

180
00:07:57,210 --> 00:08:00,714
* Ran a cafe *

181
00:08:00,748 --> 00:08:05,252
* Near the university. *

182
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:09,022
MALE PILOT (over P.A.):
Uh, takeoff is

183
00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:10,624
the most perilous phase
of air travel.

184
00:08:10,658 --> 00:08:12,726
If you're gonna crash,
that's when it happens.

185
00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:14,227
Wait. Am I on mic?

186
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:15,963
FEMALE PILOT:
Yes, Frank.

187
00:08:15,996 --> 00:08:17,831
Uh, folks,
you were just listening

188
00:08:17,865 --> 00:08:20,534
to a new play I wrote--
Death at 600 Feet.

189
00:08:20,568 --> 00:08:21,869
Yeah.

190
00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:23,737
I don't think
that's making it better.

191
00:08:23,771 --> 00:08:26,006
Well, thank you for the note,
Scott Rudin.

192
00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:29,009
I'm sorry to announce
that all our TVs are out.

193
00:08:29,042 --> 00:08:30,410
PASSENGERS (groaning):
Oh!

194
00:08:30,443 --> 00:08:33,013
But you're welcome to read
our in-flight magazine,

195
00:08:33,046 --> 00:08:36,984
featuring an interview
with our CEO, Hanuki Atanawa.

196
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,719
PASSENGERS (louder):
Oh!

197
00:08:38,752 --> 00:08:40,721
Maybe we'll have
one of those passenger riots

198
00:08:40,754 --> 00:08:43,591
that seem to occur every
other day on U.S. airlines.

199
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,593
(woman grunting, panting)

200
00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:48,729
-Could I get another seat?
-No, absolutely not!

201
00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:50,764
You chose
an economy modest ticket.

202
00:08:50,798 --> 00:08:53,200
Please! They're both farting!

203
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,937
All it would take
is a single spark

204
00:08:56,970 --> 00:08:58,939
to set this powder keg off.

205
00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:00,674
(passengers grunting)

206
00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:02,576
-(clamoring)
-(bottles clinking)

207
00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:06,179
PASSENGERS (chanting):
Hey, hey, TWA!

208
00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:08,215
How many flights
did you cancel today?!

209
00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:09,950
Hey, hey, TWA!

210
00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:12,285
MALE PILOT (over P.A.): Folks,
I'm afraid due to turbulence

211
00:09:12,319 --> 00:09:15,088
among the passengers, we are
gonna have to land immediately.

212
00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:17,625
Looks like we will not
be going to Gainesville.

213
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:20,628
(passengers cheering)

214
00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:22,796
MALE PILOT: (chuckles)
It is pretty great, isn't it?

215
00:09:22,830 --> 00:09:25,532
Our new destination is,
uh... let's see.

216
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:28,401
-New Orleans!
-(passengers cheering)

217
00:09:28,435 --> 00:09:31,471
It's a miracle! Everyone wins!

218
00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:33,874
(clock ticking)

219
00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:37,477
* Happy birthday to me *

220
00:09:37,510 --> 00:09:41,148
* Happy birthday
to me. *

221
00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:48,188
(band playing lively jazz music)

222
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:53,293
Look, Lisa! Isn't that nice?

223
00:09:53,326 --> 00:09:56,096
The sign's telling you
to celebrate!

224
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,098
What are you celebrating?

225
00:09:58,131 --> 00:10:00,300
Humidity at a 98%.

226
00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:03,804
Don't they sound great?

227
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:06,173
Yep. More musicians
better than me.

228
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:07,507
Oh, boy.

229
00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:10,410
You're good at cheering her up.
I'll take Bart.

230
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,679
Whoop-de-do.

231
00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:13,480
HOMER:
Hmm. (chuckles)

232
00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:15,248
Well, I appreciate
you choosing me, Dad,

233
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:17,250
but I don't know
how much fun I'll be.

234
00:10:17,284 --> 00:10:19,286
I think I can
cheer my princess up.

235
00:10:19,319 --> 00:10:21,588
-I don't think you can.
-Oh, I think I can.

236
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,023
I'm a pretty tough nut.

237
00:10:23,056 --> 00:10:25,458
Well, if you're a nut,
I will crack you up.

238
00:10:25,492 --> 00:10:27,027
Not with puns, I'm afraid.

239
00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:28,161
-Yes, I can.
-No, really.

240
00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:29,362
-You like puns.
-No, I don't.

241
00:10:29,396 --> 00:10:30,664
I said cheer up!

242
00:10:30,698 --> 00:10:32,199
That kind of scares me.

243
00:10:32,232 --> 00:10:34,534
-Scary "eek" or scary "ha ha"?
-Why would you say that?

244
00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:35,803
There is no scary "ha ha."

245
00:10:35,836 --> 00:10:37,170
-Yes, there is.
-No, there isn't.

246
00:10:37,204 --> 00:10:40,307
-What about scary clowns?
-Nobody likes scary clowns!

247
00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:42,475
-Go to your room!
-I'm in New Orleans!

248
00:10:42,509 --> 00:10:44,244
That's your answer
to everything!

249
00:10:48,716 --> 00:10:51,885
HOMER: Did you know that a man
can fall in love with a city?

250
00:10:51,919 --> 00:10:53,954
It happens slowly at first.

251
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:55,555
Then when you develop a crush,

252
00:10:55,588 --> 00:10:58,692
you find your love
just grows and grows.

253
00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:01,228
If you like, you can take
that drink on the street.

254
00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:03,430
(gasps) Even Bourbon Street?

255
00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:05,632
(lively jazz music playing)

256
00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:07,167
(gasps)

257
00:11:11,438 --> 00:11:14,241
Oh, I'm out.

258
00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:16,576
Enjoy.

259
00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:19,479
HOMER: And then you discover
a thousand little things

260
00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,648
you love about the city.

261
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:23,616
*

262
00:11:26,619 --> 00:11:27,855
Cajun crawfish.

263
00:11:27,888 --> 00:11:29,022
Lamb tagine.

264
00:11:29,056 --> 00:11:30,590
Grilled lamb sausage.

265
00:11:30,623 --> 00:11:31,658
Zucchini bisque.

266
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:32,993
Crabmeat po'boy.

267
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:33,994
Duck po'boy.

268
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,662
Chicken sausage po'boy.

269
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:37,430
Crawfish sausage po'boy.

270
00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:39,099
Cochon de lait po'boy.

271
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:41,268
Turkey giardiniera po'boy.

272
00:11:41,301 --> 00:11:42,602
Roast beef po'boy.

273
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:44,171
Alligator po'boy.

274
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:45,572
Catfish amandine.

275
00:11:45,605 --> 00:11:46,907
Crawfish amandine.

276
00:11:46,940 --> 00:11:48,508
Crawfish étouffée.

277
00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:49,709
Boiled crawfish.

278
00:11:49,743 --> 00:11:51,011
Cajun crawfish.

279
00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,679
Cajun shrimp and duck pasta.

280
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:53,847
Fried crab cake.

281
00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:55,048
Pecan catfish.

282
00:11:55,082 --> 00:11:56,216
Blackened redfish.

283
00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:58,385
Seafood mirliton casserole.

284
00:11:58,418 --> 00:11:59,386
Fried chicken.

285
00:11:59,419 --> 00:12:00,888
Fried green tomatoes.

286
00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:02,622
Stuffed shrimp. Muffuletta.

287
00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,357
Barbecue brisket sandwich.

288
00:12:04,391 --> 00:12:05,926
Barbecue chicken sandwich.

289
00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:07,427
Smoky bacon greens.

290
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:08,962
Seafood au gratin.

291
00:12:08,996 --> 00:12:11,198
Seafood gumbo. Frogs' legs.

292
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:14,201
There's also a lot
of historical sites.

293
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:15,235
HOMER:
Chicken gumbo.

294
00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:16,236
Jambalaya.

295
00:12:16,269 --> 00:12:17,370
Spinach artichoke.

296
00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:19,539
Creole sweet potato pone.

297
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,441
Red beans and rice
with sausage.

298
00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:23,210
Veggie red beans and rice.

299
00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:24,644
Pralines in cookies.

300
00:12:24,677 --> 00:12:25,813
Oyster pralines.

301
00:12:25,846 --> 00:12:26,814
Oyster shots.

302
00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:27,881
Oyster patties.

303
00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:29,116
Bananas Foster.

304
00:12:29,149 --> 00:12:30,918
King cake. Dixie cake.

305
00:12:30,951 --> 00:12:31,952
Pecan pie.

306
00:12:31,985 --> 00:12:33,086
Cajun boudin.

307
00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:34,087
Boudin balls.

308
00:12:34,121 --> 00:12:35,322
Crawfish rémoulade.

309
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:37,490
Shrimp and lump crabmeat
ravigote.

310
00:12:37,524 --> 00:12:39,993
Au croissant crawfish po'boy.

311
00:12:40,027 --> 00:12:41,328
And yaka mein.

312
00:12:41,361 --> 00:12:44,097
(sighs loudly) Yeah.

313
00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:46,466
Okay, sweetie, Daddy's in love.

314
00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:48,936
So now we'll deal
with your sadness.

315
00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:51,771
Okay. It's good
to see you happy, Dad.

316
00:12:51,805 --> 00:12:53,673
(retches)
Hold that thought.

317
00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:56,176
Uh, my good boy,
is there a vomitorium?

318
00:12:56,209 --> 00:12:59,112
This town is famous
for five vomitoria:

319
00:12:59,146 --> 00:13:01,181
the elegant Creole Vomitorium,

320
00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:02,782
the Blues Vomitorium,

321
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:05,018
the traditional
Heritage Vomitorium,

322
00:13:05,052 --> 00:13:07,020
the Upchuck Mangione Museum,

323
00:13:07,054 --> 00:13:09,489
and the bucket over
at Chartres Street.

324
00:13:09,522 --> 00:13:11,859
Alert them all.

325
00:13:11,892 --> 00:13:13,793
Would you like to look
at historic homes

326
00:13:13,827 --> 00:13:15,362
in the Garden District?

327
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:17,030
"Historic"? "Homes"?

328
00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:19,299
"Garden"? "District"?

329
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:22,035
Which of those words
do you think appeals to me?

330
00:13:22,069 --> 00:13:25,472
Okay. We could talk
about your hat.

331
00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,707
It has a lot of history, too.

332
00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:30,677
-Did you know that it...
-(groans)

333
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:33,680
All right, wise guy.
Here's something you'll like.

334
00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:35,715
Cool. I always read better

335
00:13:35,748 --> 00:13:37,684
when the letters
are dripping like blood.

336
00:13:37,717 --> 00:13:40,553
Bart, you go in there,
and I'll pray for you in here.

337
00:13:44,391 --> 00:13:46,659
Please, Lord, please.

338
00:13:46,693 --> 00:13:48,728
I need to finish this, okay?

339
00:13:48,761 --> 00:13:50,763
All day, you had.

340
00:13:52,599 --> 00:13:55,502
Please, Lord.
We're a family on a budget.

341
00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:59,739
We just need a little relief
from our demons, please.

342
00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:03,543
Hmm.

343
00:14:03,576 --> 00:14:05,045
Where are we?

344
00:14:05,078 --> 00:14:06,413
I smell Pringles.

345
00:14:06,446 --> 00:14:08,882
(groans) You'll pay.

346
00:14:08,916 --> 00:14:10,250
You'll all pay!

347
00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:12,852
-Mom, will you pay for this?
-(groans): Oh.

348
00:14:12,886 --> 00:14:15,722
Now, sweetie,
let's find a restaurant for you.

349
00:14:15,755 --> 00:14:18,025
I don't think
my problem can be solved

350
00:14:18,058 --> 00:14:20,227
by crawfish and jambalaya.

351
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:24,097
I wonder, do they have jazz
in New Orleans?

352
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:29,669
Okay, Lisa,
look at your hero for an hour.

353
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:32,272
I'm gonna take a whiz
in the cemetery next door.

354
00:14:32,305 --> 00:14:33,606
(hums a tune)

355
00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:37,177
Okay, who to choose?
Who to choose?

356
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:40,613
Ooh, Etienne de Boré.

357
00:14:40,647 --> 00:14:42,382
I wish you could talk.

358
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:45,385
(grunts excitedly)

359
00:14:45,418 --> 00:14:48,421
Man, I have been waiting
for someone to make that wish.

360
00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:50,057
What's on your mind?

361
00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:51,624
My music teacher says

362
00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:54,061
there'll always be
someone better than me.

363
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:56,196
(chuckles):
Well, that's not the only way

364
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:58,231
to be part of jazz.

365
00:14:58,265 --> 00:15:01,969
Well, I could be a jazz critic
or a music executive.

366
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:04,371
Jazz critic? Music executive?

367
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:07,107
They're nothing
but glorified grave robbers.

368
00:15:07,140 --> 00:15:09,442
Look what I found
in one of the graves.

369
00:15:09,476 --> 00:15:11,979
-Put that back!
-(Homer groans)

370
00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:14,081
Lisa, darling,
you just keep searching.

371
00:15:14,114 --> 00:15:16,984
You can find anything you want
in New Orleans.

372
00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:20,753
Except, apparently,
statue polish and pigeon poison.

373
00:15:20,787 --> 00:15:25,092
Thank you. And may I ask you,
how are things in heaven?

374
00:15:25,125 --> 00:15:27,760
You know that thing
we used to call reefer

375
00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:29,829
and you people
now call medicine?

376
00:15:29,862 --> 00:15:31,164
I do.

377
00:15:31,198 --> 00:15:34,734
Well, they have it up in heaven,
and it is mighty fine.

378
00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:36,469
Mighty fine!

379
00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:38,338
(laughs)

380
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:40,107
So, any last advice?

381
00:15:40,140 --> 00:15:42,309
Your father knows best.

382
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:43,810
Let's go to a bar.

383
00:15:43,843 --> 00:15:45,145
-But...
-Daddy's right.

384
00:15:45,178 --> 00:15:46,579
Can I sing you out?

385
00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:49,416
Anything but
"What a Wonderful World" please.

386
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:51,318
Can you sing
"What a Wonderful World"?

387
00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:53,353
What a horrible world.

388
00:15:59,026 --> 00:16:01,028
("When the Saints
Go Marching In" playing)

389
00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:13,773
HOMER: Okay, I moved her
from crying to glum.

390
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,375
Now to shoot for happy.

391
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:17,844
I just pray they don't
see through her fake ID.

392
00:16:17,877 --> 00:16:19,846
MAN:
Hmm.

393
00:16:19,879 --> 00:16:21,381
Well, it's better than his.

394
00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:23,250
Uh-huh.

395
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:25,985
(Bart laughs)

396
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,792
Milhouse, anything yet?

397
00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:34,227
No effect.

398
00:16:34,261 --> 00:16:37,030
But how's Lisa dealing
with her depression?

399
00:16:37,064 --> 00:16:39,532
Oh, give up on Lisa.
Wait for Maggie.

400
00:16:39,566 --> 00:16:40,967
Oh, I don't...

401
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,070
Wait! Maggie likes me?

402
00:16:44,437 --> 00:16:46,673
Still not working.

403
00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:48,341
What's not working?

404
00:16:48,375 --> 00:16:51,411
Uh, Bart's got voodoo dolls
of all you guys.

405
00:16:51,444 --> 00:16:53,813
(scoffs) There's no voodoo
in Gainesville.

406
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,015
Their flight got diverted
to New Orleans.

407
00:16:56,049 --> 00:16:57,584
(all whimper)

408
00:16:57,617 --> 00:17:01,088
(grunts)
You hackeyed the wrong sack!

409
00:17:01,121 --> 00:17:03,090
(all grunting)

410
00:17:03,123 --> 00:17:04,757
It's working!

411
00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:07,194
So, has Maggie said
anything about me?

412
00:17:07,227 --> 00:17:10,697
We have a lot in common.
Same bedtime.

413
00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:13,200
We both like clapping.

414
00:17:15,068 --> 00:17:16,536
Ow! Ow! Ow!

415
00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,571
Come on, we've got to go
meet your father.

416
00:17:18,605 --> 00:17:20,107
Let's go.

417
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:22,909
Well, there's no miracle
for me here.

418
00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:25,245
(cries) Why?

419
00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:28,081
Don't worry, sweetie.
No one can see you.

420
00:17:28,115 --> 00:17:31,050
You're alone in the dark,
anonymous.

421
00:17:31,084 --> 00:17:33,086
-Spotlight?!
-What?!

422
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:36,956
Lisa, would you do us the honor
of joining us onstage?

423
00:17:36,989 --> 00:17:39,959
How do you know me?

424
00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:43,730
That man is my uncle.

425
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:46,032
(gasps)
Bleeding Gums Murphy?

426
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,935
-We called him Oscar.
-Oscar! Oh.

427
00:17:48,968 --> 00:17:50,403
Oscar Gums Murphy.

428
00:17:50,437 --> 00:17:52,372
You still play bari sax?

429
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:55,108
I wish I could play for you,
Bleeding Gums' nephew,

430
00:17:55,142 --> 00:17:56,943
but I have the yips.

431
00:17:56,976 --> 00:17:58,545
Oh, that's too bad.

432
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:01,314
Well, could you hold this
while I play clarinet?

433
00:18:01,348 --> 00:18:04,050
Now, could you give
the mouthpiece a little kiss?

434
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,486
I think I see through
your simple plan.

435
00:18:06,519 --> 00:18:09,622
My uncle said you were the most
promising young musician

436
00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:11,924
-he'd ever met.
-He did?

437
00:18:11,958 --> 00:18:13,993
(scoffs) It was kind of
an insult to me,

438
00:18:14,026 --> 00:18:15,895
but he was
pretty passive-aggressive.

439
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:17,497
So, are you gonna play?

440
00:18:19,031 --> 00:18:20,833
Yes! I want to jam!

441
00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:22,935
I want to scat! I want to riff!

442
00:18:22,969 --> 00:18:25,272
I want to get down! Oh!

443
00:18:25,305 --> 00:18:27,974
(playing lively jazz music)

444
00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:37,083
(crowd cheering)

445
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:40,353
She's playing.
You did it, Homie!

446
00:18:40,387 --> 00:18:42,855
Marge, I just realized,
we've helped everyone else,

447
00:18:42,889 --> 00:18:45,458
but we haven't done
anything for you.

448
00:18:45,492 --> 00:18:47,527
A mother's happy as long as

449
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,896
all her children are happy.

450
00:18:51,664 --> 00:18:53,633
Another one, sir?

451
00:18:53,666 --> 00:18:55,802
No, that's not my... Uh, yeah.

452
00:18:55,835 --> 00:18:57,837
Uh, this one straight up.

453
00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:04,143
Aw.

454
00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:11,718
(saxophone playing jazz music)

455
00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:14,221
HOMER:
Lisa, knock off that racket!

456
00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:16,423
LISA:
Oh, how I've missed this.

457
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:20,727
(gasps)
Mr. Armstrong!

458
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:24,063
-Why does a ghost sweat?
-I don't know.

459
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:27,133
But I would give anything
for a new shirt.

460
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,469
(both laugh)

461
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:32,739
I'd also really like
to be alive again.

462
00:19:32,772 --> 00:19:34,674
(laughs)

463
00:19:34,707 --> 00:19:36,709
(sighs)

464
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:46,052
The beignet eliminates
the only flaw of the donut:

465
00:19:46,085 --> 00:19:48,488
there is no hole.

466
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:49,789
*

467
00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:55,228
(fireworks whistling, popping)

468
00:19:57,964 --> 00:19:59,866
(fireworks whistling, popping)

469
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:01,868
(sighs)
Well, we did it, kids.

470
00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:03,370
And the best thing is,

471
00:20:03,403 --> 00:20:06,205
the next episode
will beat Gunsmoke.

472
00:20:06,239 --> 00:20:09,376
What about all the episodes
they made on radio?

473
00:20:09,409 --> 00:20:10,843
-Have a beignet.
-(grunts)

474
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:13,646
(fireworks whistling, popping)

475
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,093
Shh!

476
00:21:03,996 --> 00:21:05,965
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH