1 00:00:08,475 --> 00:00:11,411 Homer, the results of your physical are very concerning. 2 00:00:11,478 --> 00:00:15,015 - You're 80 pounds overweight. - I wore my socks on the scale. 3 00:00:15,082 --> 00:00:17,084 And your cholesterol is sky‐high. 4 00:00:17,150 --> 00:00:18,452 Go big or go home. 5 00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:21,822 Oh, and your testosterone is just a little bit low. 6 00:00:21,889 --> 00:00:23,524 (gasps) Testosterone? 7 00:00:23,590 --> 00:00:25,425 That's what fuels my punching and yelling. 8 00:00:25,492 --> 00:00:27,094 And my undeserved confidence. 9 00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:28,428 Now I'll never be 10 00:00:28,495 --> 00:00:33,333 an NFL quarterback/international superspy. (moans) 11 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:37,070 Don't worry, low T is very common amongst men your age. 12 00:00:37,137 --> 00:00:39,006 It can be treated with a prescription drug 13 00:00:39,072 --> 00:00:40,674 called Vicodude. 14 00:00:40,741 --> 00:00:43,911 - Pill me up. - But before I give you the drug, 15 00:00:43,977 --> 00:00:48,181 I just need you to watch this short informational video. 16 00:00:48,248 --> 00:00:50,250 There's an ad first? 17 00:00:50,317 --> 00:00:53,420 If I had more testosterone, I'd kill you. 18 00:00:53,487 --> 00:00:57,457 A single truck can't possibly be best in its class 19 00:00:57,524 --> 00:01:00,594 in torque, towing and payload. 20 00:01:00,661 --> 00:01:04,798 - (shouts) - Think again, Professor Killjoy. 21 00:01:04,865 --> 00:01:07,367 ♪ 22 00:01:08,101 --> 00:01:10,470 Man up with the Road Monster 23 00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:12,739 Triple‐XL 550. 24 00:01:12,806 --> 00:01:17,811 The Triple‐XL 550 delivers ultimate tow, 25 00:01:17,878 --> 00:01:20,213 ultimate payload 26 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:23,183 and ultimate torque. 27 00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:26,086 The Triple‐XL 550. 28 00:01:26,153 --> 00:01:28,855 It's what a man drives. 29 00:01:31,124 --> 00:01:32,960 Dr. Hibbert, you're a genius. 30 00:01:33,026 --> 00:01:35,162 That truck is exactly what I need. 31 00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:37,764 No, what you need is medication. 32 00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:40,634 Wrong again, Professor Killjoy. 33 00:01:40,701 --> 00:01:42,436 See you next year. 34 00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:44,104 Not if this chart is right. 35 00:01:44,171 --> 00:01:46,573 (chuckles) Ooh. 36 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:49,576 Peonies are such interesting flowers. 37 00:01:49,643 --> 00:01:51,878 They need less water, but... (screams) 38 00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:55,816 Look what the doctor made me get. 39 00:01:55,882 --> 00:01:57,951 (growls) 40 00:01:58,018 --> 00:01:59,586 (chuckles) You know it, baby. 41 00:01:59,653 --> 00:02:01,788 The engine growls just like that. 42 00:02:01,855 --> 00:02:04,691 And don't worry, it has maximum torque for its class 43 00:02:04,758 --> 00:02:08,261 and the highest possible ranking from J. D. Power. 44 00:02:08,328 --> 00:02:09,963 What about his associates? 45 00:02:10,030 --> 00:02:12,666 Oh, you know they're on board. 46 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:13,867 ‐(laughs) ‐Look at me. 47 00:02:13,934 --> 00:02:16,470 I'm a payload. 48 00:02:16,536 --> 00:02:19,406 This truck is an offense to everything I hold dear, and... 49 00:02:19,473 --> 00:02:23,944 Oh, but it comes with a family subscription to Slapify, 50 00:02:24,011 --> 00:02:25,846 the music streaming service. 51 00:02:25,912 --> 00:02:29,316 I don't know what that is, but I'm great for having it. 52 00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:32,686 Whoa, and check out the picture on the back‐up cam. 53 00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:35,622 It even has infrared. 54 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,691 (thudding) 55 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:41,995 Okay, Slapify, let's see if your algorithm 56 00:02:42,062 --> 00:02:44,131 can predict my taste. 57 00:02:44,197 --> 00:02:47,167 (snickers) Good luck. 58 00:02:47,234 --> 00:02:49,970 Age: eight. Gender: female. 59 00:02:50,037 --> 00:02:53,040 How did you hear about our service: truck. 60 00:02:53,106 --> 00:02:55,609 Oh, it already has suggestions. 61 00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:58,045 (pop music playing) 62 00:02:58,111 --> 00:03:00,847 Meh. A little trendy, not for me. 63 00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:03,450 (alternative rock playing) 64 00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:06,720 Okay, but still pretty mainstream. 65 00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:08,655 (sighs) Good taste is a curse, 66 00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:12,459 but I'm sure a great song is just a click away. 67 00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:15,462 - (mouse clicking) - LISA: Mm‐mm. Hmm. Uh... 68 00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:20,367 "If you hate everything, you might like this." 69 00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:22,536 Quilloughby? Never heard of him. 70 00:03:22,602 --> 00:03:25,972 "Quilloughby and his British bandmates, the Snuffs, 71 00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:27,941 "dominated the '80s indie scene 72 00:03:28,008 --> 00:03:30,677 with their brand of literate, sardonic..." 73 00:03:30,744 --> 00:03:32,179 Ooh, sardonic. 74 00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:35,282 "...music that focused on Quilloughby's obsessions, 75 00:03:35,348 --> 00:03:39,352 especially his militant vegetarianism." 76 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:41,555 ♪ 77 00:03:41,621 --> 00:03:44,424 ♪ The flesh that you cover with cheese ♪ 78 00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:47,828 ♪ Is proof of your moral disease ♪ 79 00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:51,298 ♪ It's death for no reason ♪ 80 00:03:51,364 --> 00:03:53,033 ♪ And death for no reason ♪ 81 00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:55,602 ♪ Is hamburger homicide. ♪ 82 00:03:55,669 --> 00:03:57,838 (lowing) 83 00:04:00,107 --> 00:04:02,309 Oh! Yes. 84 00:04:03,710 --> 00:04:04,778 (school bell ringing) 85 00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:08,348 Quilloughby's music is so smart and dour and jangly 86 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:12,586 and no one has seen him in 30 years, he's a famous recluse. 87 00:04:12,652 --> 00:04:16,089 And his commitment to animal rights is so inspiring. 88 00:04:16,156 --> 00:04:20,560 (gasps) I just had the most amazing idea. 89 00:04:20,627 --> 00:04:24,331 Lisa doesn't like it when other people talk. 90 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,235 Attention, Elementarians. 91 00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:30,937 Inspired by my new favorite musician, 92 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,939 whom I'm sure you've never heard of, 93 00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:35,542 today is the first Mushroom Monday. 94 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:40,046 So dig in to these all‐vegan mushroom tacos. 95 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:43,583 Mushrooms? Those are chairs for toads. 96 00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:47,087 Don't you see? The flesh that you cover with cheese 97 00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:49,890 is proof of your moral disease. 98 00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:51,057 Gah? 99 00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:54,127 Just give them a chance. 100 00:04:54,194 --> 00:04:55,295 So delicious. 101 00:04:55,362 --> 00:04:59,032 Three kinds of ground mushrooms: portobello, shiitake... 102 00:04:59,099 --> 00:05:02,803 Don't forget the yummy little pieces of bacon. 103 00:05:02,869 --> 00:05:05,105 (shouting, coughing) 104 00:05:05,172 --> 00:05:06,573 Ew, ew, ew. 105 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,275 You said these were vegan. 106 00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:11,845 But they are. Vegetables plus bacon. 107 00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:14,281 "Vegon." Am I wrong? 108 00:05:14,347 --> 00:05:17,350 (gasps) I ate meat. 109 00:05:17,417 --> 00:05:20,620 Haw‐haw! This taco had a mom. 110 00:05:20,687 --> 00:05:23,089 ALL: Mmm... 111 00:05:26,359 --> 00:05:28,495 (crying) 112 00:05:28,562 --> 00:05:30,564 (laughter) 113 00:05:32,966 --> 00:05:35,836 Everyone at my school is a jerk. 114 00:05:35,902 --> 00:05:38,004 Why are they so mean? Why? 115 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,206 Is the problem me? 116 00:05:39,272 --> 00:05:41,675 QUILLOUGHBY: The problem is never you. 117 00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:44,377 It's those sour‐breathed know‐nothing sheep 118 00:05:44,444 --> 00:05:48,248 who graze the blighted meadows of your so‐called school. 119 00:05:48,315 --> 00:05:50,150 Gah? 120 00:05:50,217 --> 00:05:53,386 Okay, it was probably just a bacon hallucination. 121 00:05:53,453 --> 00:05:55,956 Quilloughby isn't actually in my room. 122 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,425 I'm traumatized by eating meat. 123 00:05:58,491 --> 00:05:59,960 You must stop talking to yourself. 124 00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:01,461 People will think you've gone mad. 125 00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:03,430 - (screams) - ♪ 126 00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:10,613 You're not real the real Quilloughby. You're imaginary. 127 00:06:10,637 --> 00:06:11,972 I've gone crazy. 128 00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:13,740 ♪ Master of the obvious ♪ 129 00:06:13,807 --> 00:06:17,277 ♪ Ensconced in her dreadful red frock. ♪ 130 00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:20,046 I don't want to be crazy. Not this kind of crazy. 131 00:06:20,113 --> 00:06:21,448 Just get out of here. 132 00:06:21,514 --> 00:06:23,884 Hey, Lis, what you pointing at? 133 00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:26,052 Some bacon you want to eat? 134 00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:28,388 I've got a pig nose. Want to eat me? 135 00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:29,556 (snorting) 136 00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:31,091 (snorting, laughs) 137 00:06:31,157 --> 00:06:32,759 (all snorting) 138 00:06:32,826 --> 00:06:35,095 (crying) 139 00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:39,499 ‐(whispers indistinctly) ‐Oh. 140 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:41,201 Mm‐hmm. 141 00:06:41,268 --> 00:06:44,504 Bart, slowly, almost imperceptibly, 142 00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:47,207 your friends are growing tired of you. 143 00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:51,177 What‐‐ what? I'm the drumstick of this chicken bucket. 144 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,613 (laughs) They're not getting tired of me. 145 00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:56,783 Of course we're not, Bart. 146 00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:58,418 Wait, what was that look? 147 00:06:58,485 --> 00:07:00,186 What look? 148 00:07:00,954 --> 00:07:02,022 (Lisa chuckles) 149 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,957 You guys are not getting tired of me. 150 00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:05,859 (yawns) 151 00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:07,627 No, no, I was just yawning 152 00:07:07,694 --> 00:07:10,964 because I stayed up late, thinking about your pranks. 153 00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:12,666 Still so fresh. 154 00:07:12,732 --> 00:07:14,768 (both chuckle) 155 00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:20,040 Quilloughby, you completely ruined my brother 156 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,042 with just one sentence. 157 00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:23,376 Thank you. 158 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:27,180 Oh, there's nothing more tiresome than gratitude. 159 00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:29,616 I think I'm gonna like hallucinating you. 160 00:07:29,683 --> 00:07:32,919 Here's a gift. Put this on your faded Army jacket. 161 00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:34,321 (gasps) Oh, my God. 162 00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:37,524 You think I'm cool enough to wear a faded Army jacket. 163 00:07:37,590 --> 00:07:39,659 Hmm. Keep in mind, I'm merely a product 164 00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:41,795 of your fractured psyche. 165 00:07:41,861 --> 00:07:43,596 Oh, shut up, don't ruin it. 166 00:07:43,663 --> 00:07:45,131 (laughs) 167 00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:47,667 (Homer humming) 168 00:07:49,402 --> 00:07:51,171 Hey, Homer, ever so slowly, 169 00:07:51,237 --> 00:07:53,740 your friends are growing tired of you. 170 00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:55,675 With this much testosterone? 171 00:07:55,742 --> 00:07:57,177 No way, baby. 172 00:07:57,243 --> 00:07:59,779 Aw. Take me for a ride in your truck. 173 00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:01,247 Trucks aren't for driving. 174 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,516 They're for doing kick‐ass truck stuff. 175 00:08:03,583 --> 00:08:06,286 Have you actually done any truck stuff? 176 00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:07,787 Put it on. 177 00:08:07,854 --> 00:08:09,823 ♪ 178 00:08:09,889 --> 00:08:12,525 (grunting, shouting) 179 00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:16,896 But I don't want this. 180 00:08:16,963 --> 00:08:18,298 You're welcome! 181 00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:21,101 ♪ 182 00:08:36,549 --> 00:08:39,552 For an imaginary friend, you were really keen 183 00:08:39,619 --> 00:08:40,487 to get out of the house. 184 00:08:40,553 --> 00:08:43,123 Ugh, that small woman was such a bore. 185 00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:45,992 Oh. Maggie's a baby, and she was sleeping. 186 00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:47,494 Even she knows it. 187 00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:50,096 This place reminds me of my own hometown. 188 00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:52,665 It's dismal and nothing good will ever come from it. 189 00:08:52,732 --> 00:08:54,401 Well, almost nothing. 190 00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:56,669 (chuckles) Get out your tickers and tape, 191 00:08:56,736 --> 00:08:58,738 here comes the prat parade. 192 00:08:58,805 --> 00:09:02,342 Facial hair is not a substitute for personality. 193 00:09:02,409 --> 00:09:05,011 Two times zero is still zero. 194 00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:08,214 (sniffs) Bit early for the apricot brandy, 195 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:10,417 - is it not, Vicar? - (laughs) 196 00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:13,353 Quilloughby, is there anyone you do like? 197 00:09:13,420 --> 00:09:15,955 Yeah, well, let me tell you something, Lisa. 198 00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,290 ♪ 199 00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:19,826 ♪ Every day I try to smile ♪ 200 00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:23,263 ♪ But can't help but frown ♪ 201 00:09:24,164 --> 00:09:27,100 ♪ Every day I draw my bath ♪ 202 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:30,236 ♪ And pray I will drown ♪ 203 00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:34,974 ♪ I step out my door and I take a deep breath ♪ 204 00:09:35,041 --> 00:09:38,912 ♪ Turn back inside and pray for my death ♪ 205 00:09:38,978 --> 00:09:40,780 ♪ 'Cause everyone is horrid ♪ 206 00:09:40,847 --> 00:09:43,583 ♪ Except me and possibly you ♪ 207 00:09:43,650 --> 00:09:45,385 ♪ Possibly me ♪ 208 00:09:45,452 --> 00:09:47,353 ♪ Oh, everyone is horrid ♪ 209 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:52,358 ♪ And my dear, I fear you are, too ♪ 210 00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:54,427 ♪ Oh. ♪ 211 00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:04,370 ♪ 212 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:06,306 ‐(plays note) ‐Lisa Simpson. 213 00:10:06,372 --> 00:10:09,676 Those measures were supposed to be pianissimo, 214 00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:14,280 but instead they were sforzando and scherzando. 215 00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:17,050 (chuckles, whispering indistinctly) 216 00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:20,286 (both laugh) 217 00:10:20,353 --> 00:10:22,198 Well, would you care to share your private tee‐hees 218 00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:23,590 with the class? 219 00:10:23,656 --> 00:10:26,426 I was just thinking, every day you wave that wand, 220 00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:29,963 and yet nothing magical ever happens. 221 00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:31,464 (laughter) 222 00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:34,434 You're a smart‐mouthed little sass pants. 223 00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:38,905 And you're a sad little man whose best days never happened. 224 00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,039 (all gasping) 225 00:10:40,106 --> 00:10:41,141 (gasps) 226 00:10:41,207 --> 00:10:42,675 I'm not sad, I'm happy. 227 00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:45,345 And 5'8" is a very nice height for a fella. 228 00:10:45,411 --> 00:10:47,814 (crying): Very nice. 229 00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:51,217 Lisa, I enjoyed that. 230 00:10:51,284 --> 00:10:53,386 And I enjoy nothing. 231 00:10:55,255 --> 00:10:56,866 Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, I called you in here 232 00:10:56,890 --> 00:10:57,423 because Lisa's behavior has become wry, sardonic, and yes, 233 00:10:57,490 --> 00:11:02,662 poetically world‐weary. 234 00:11:02,729 --> 00:11:03,997 I know what's going on. 235 00:11:04,063 --> 00:11:06,132 Lisa's become infatuated 236 00:11:06,199 --> 00:11:08,701 with this snobby, judgy, British crooner 237 00:11:08,768 --> 00:11:10,336 - from the '80s. - Hmm. 238 00:11:10,403 --> 00:11:11,538 Hmm... 239 00:11:12,405 --> 00:11:13,540 Oh... 240 00:11:13,606 --> 00:11:14,807 You're right to worry. 241 00:11:14,874 --> 00:11:17,076 With the popularity of the Slapify streaming service, 242 00:11:17,143 --> 00:11:19,112 I'm seeing more children becoming lost 243 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:20,747 in the music of the past. 244 00:11:20,813 --> 00:11:23,283 ♪ Oh, here she comes ♪ 245 00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:25,952 ♪ Watch out, boy, she'll chew you up ♪ 246 00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:28,188 ♪ Oh, here she comes ♪ 247 00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:31,090 ♪ She's a man‐eater! ♪ 248 00:11:31,157 --> 00:11:33,393 Well, we take this very seriously. 249 00:11:33,459 --> 00:11:35,295 My husband and I are going to have 250 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,597 a heart‐to‐heart with our daughter tonight. 251 00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:38,798 Isn't that right, Homer? 252 00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:40,567 Oh. 253 00:11:42,001 --> 00:11:45,505 You don't tow me! I tow you! 254 00:11:45,572 --> 00:11:47,073 Stop resisting! 255 00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:49,375 Surrender to my mighty torque! 256 00:11:49,442 --> 00:11:52,278 - Never! - (both grunting) 257 00:11:53,079 --> 00:11:54,581 (seatbelt clicks, engine starts) 258 00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,585 (grunting) 259 00:12:02,188 --> 00:12:04,190 What has gotten into you? 260 00:12:04,257 --> 00:12:06,593 You used to be such a happy little girl. 261 00:12:06,659 --> 00:12:08,127 When? 262 00:12:08,194 --> 00:12:10,330 Okay, but never like this‐‐ 263 00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:11,864 with the sour attitude, 264 00:12:11,931 --> 00:12:13,333 and the black booties. 265 00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:16,069 You've become a crab‐‐ no, a pill! 266 00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:19,672 Lisa, darling, please silence the din. 267 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,174 ♪ 268 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:23,209 (grunts) That's it! 269 00:12:23,276 --> 00:12:25,878 I'm cancelling your music subscription. 270 00:12:25,945 --> 00:12:29,015 Jiggly... and bloop. 271 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:30,016 (both gasp) 272 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:31,751 Shocking. 273 00:12:31,818 --> 00:12:33,186 (Lisa straining) 274 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,320 (Quilloughby moans) 275 00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:36,289 How can Mom take away the only place 276 00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:38,157 I can hear your music? 277 00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:40,426 Maybe not the only place. 278 00:12:40,493 --> 00:12:42,762 Apparently, this is happening. 279 00:12:42,829 --> 00:12:44,197 Hmm. 280 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:46,199 (gasps) Oh, my God. 281 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:49,302 I can see you. I mean, the real you. 282 00:12:49,369 --> 00:12:51,137 Well, you're in for a treat, my dear. 283 00:12:51,204 --> 00:12:53,172 My live shows are, quote, 284 00:12:53,239 --> 00:12:55,775 "like a three‐hour dance party in a freshly‐dug grave." 285 00:12:55,842 --> 00:12:58,578 David Fricke, Rolling Stone magazine, 1987. 286 00:12:58,645 --> 00:13:01,314 Oh, but Marge will never let me go. 287 00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:03,983 And even if she would, I don't have enough money. 288 00:13:04,050 --> 00:13:06,919 Those tickets cost, like, five Lego sets. 289 00:13:06,986 --> 00:13:08,588 Look in your pocket, Lisa. 290 00:13:08,655 --> 00:13:10,523 (gasps) 291 00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:12,325 My dad's credit card. 292 00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:15,128 Did you steal this? Did I? 293 00:13:15,194 --> 00:13:17,096 A little of both. It's complicated. 294 00:13:17,163 --> 00:13:19,065 Sometimes I identify as imaginary, 295 00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:20,800 but sometimes I can do this. 296 00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:22,935 (grunts, laughs) 297 00:13:23,002 --> 00:13:25,738 Ow, the zipper! 298 00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:27,774 (both grunting, laughing) 299 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:29,676 Ow! Oh! 300 00:13:29,742 --> 00:13:31,778 (grunting) 301 00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:35,448 What? I'm a little stressed out. 302 00:13:35,515 --> 00:13:37,850 Making sandwiches calms my nerves. 303 00:13:39,585 --> 00:13:41,688 Ooh, sandwiches! 304 00:13:43,523 --> 00:13:46,225 Lisa is sullen, dressing weird, 305 00:13:46,292 --> 00:13:48,928 obsessed with English music... 306 00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:52,031 (gasps) Our eight‐year‐old has turned into a teenager. 307 00:13:52,098 --> 00:13:55,835 Well, from now on, I'm going to pay very close attention to her. 308 00:13:55,902 --> 00:14:00,206 Marge, little girls are a lot like all‐wheel anti‐lock brakes: 309 00:14:00,273 --> 00:14:02,475 when road conditions are unpredictable... 310 00:14:02,542 --> 00:14:05,511 We're talking about your daughter, not a vehicle. 311 00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:09,515 Well, both do have maximum torque for their class. 312 00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:12,085 Will you shut up about the damn truck? 313 00:14:12,151 --> 00:14:14,053 (whimpers) But the truck is who I am. 314 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,390 It's a perfect fit for my manly, off‐road lifestyle. 315 00:14:17,457 --> 00:14:18,758 Oh, really? 316 00:14:18,825 --> 00:14:20,226 You hate the outdoors. 317 00:14:20,293 --> 00:14:21,627 You've never been camping. 318 00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:23,496 You've never hauled or towed anything, 319 00:14:23,563 --> 00:14:26,232 or shown any interest in hauling or towing. 320 00:14:26,299 --> 00:14:29,335 And please, tell me the meaning of the word "torque." 321 00:14:29,402 --> 00:14:33,339 The smoke hole where the truck's farts come out? 322 00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:35,108 Torque is the tendency of a force 323 00:14:35,174 --> 00:14:38,311 to rotate the body to which it is applied. Like this! 324 00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,279 (grunts) Homer J. Simpson, 325 00:14:40,346 --> 00:14:42,749 you are not a truck guy! 326 00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:46,519 (sobbing) 327 00:14:46,586 --> 00:14:49,422 Now, I'm going to deal with an actual problem: 328 00:14:49,489 --> 00:14:52,692 our daughter's pre‐pre‐teen rebellion. 329 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:56,562 (screams) Lisa's gone! 330 00:14:57,697 --> 00:15:01,601 I'm going to my first music festival with my best friend! 331 00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:04,337 Uh, best imaginary friend. 332 00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:06,706 Right. I guess I didn't need to buy 333 00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:08,708 two VIP passes, then. 334 00:15:08,775 --> 00:15:09,976 Sorry, Dad! 335 00:15:10,042 --> 00:15:12,044 (both laugh) 336 00:15:12,111 --> 00:15:14,614 Oh, the pain of laughter... 337 00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:16,716 (laughing) 338 00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:22,889 Our daughter is by herself 339 00:15:22,955 --> 00:15:24,524 at an outdoor music whoop‐de‐doo! 340 00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,527 And she's using my stolen credit card. 341 00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:28,628 ‐(chimes) ‐What? 342 00:15:28,694 --> 00:15:29,695 ‐(chimes) ‐Huh? 343 00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:30,863 ‐(chimes) ‐Hey... 344 00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,131 No... 345 00:15:33,466 --> 00:15:36,402 Ugh, this combines my two least favorite things‐‐ 346 00:15:36,469 --> 00:15:38,838 other people's music, and other people. 347 00:15:38,905 --> 00:15:41,774 Yeah, but we're going to see the real you perform. 348 00:15:41,841 --> 00:15:43,276 Ooh, do you think you'll play 349 00:15:43,342 --> 00:15:45,344 "Labour Action at the Biscuit Factory" 350 00:15:45,411 --> 00:15:47,180 or "Simon Has a Birthmark"? 351 00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:49,048 How dreadfully predictable... 352 00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:51,083 but the nippers must suckle. 353 00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:52,785 (playing rock music) 354 00:15:52,852 --> 00:15:54,387 oh, these bands are all rubbish, 355 00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,656 and this sun is too... sunny. 356 00:15:56,722 --> 00:15:59,325 Quilloughby, this festival is our dream. 357 00:15:59,392 --> 00:16:02,395 Stop being such a, such a... 358 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:03,830 Such a pill? 359 00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:05,465 Oh. Sorry, Marge. 360 00:16:05,531 --> 00:16:08,100 Hey, I'm just trying to have a fun day. 361 00:16:08,167 --> 00:16:10,102 Oh, a "fun day." 362 00:16:10,169 --> 00:16:12,672 Why don't we all just have fizzy drinks 363 00:16:12,738 --> 00:16:14,707 and rainbow lollipops? 364 00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:16,943 Oh, la‐di‐da‐di‐da. 365 00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:18,511 (singsongy): Happy, happy, happy. 366 00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:22,181 Vacuous animals waiting for the slaughter. 367 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:27,429 Well, it's a good thing Dad got this truck. 368 00:16:27,453 --> 00:16:28,921 - Oh, my God. - You see, Marge? 369 00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:30,399 - I never want to hear another word... - Bart gets it. 370 00:16:30,423 --> 00:16:31,500 - ...about this truck. - The truck is awesome. 371 00:16:31,524 --> 00:16:33,084 - It makes me so mad! - You don't get it 372 00:16:33,125 --> 00:16:34,369 - and you never will! - Truck this, truck that. 373 00:16:34,393 --> 00:16:36,805 - Truck, truck, truck, truck... - I wish I was married to Bart! 374 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,631 (cackling) 375 00:16:38,698 --> 00:16:40,700 Ugh! You never stop whining! 376 00:16:40,766 --> 00:16:42,368 The term is "whinging." 377 00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:45,004 - Conspicuous eye roll. - (groans) 378 00:16:45,071 --> 00:16:47,173 I used to think you just hated bad art 379 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:48,508 and cruelty to animals 380 00:16:48,574 --> 00:16:50,576 and people who wear baseball hats, 381 00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:53,880 but it turns out you hate everything! 382 00:16:53,946 --> 00:16:57,250 But, Lisa, I thought that was our bond. 383 00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:59,018 ANNOUNCER: Coming now to the main stage... 384 00:16:59,085 --> 00:17:00,629 - (cheering) - performing for the first time 385 00:17:00,653 --> 00:17:02,021 in over 30 years... 386 00:17:02,088 --> 00:17:04,156 Quilloughby and the Snuffs. 387 00:17:04,223 --> 00:17:05,825 (gasps) This is it‐‐ 388 00:17:05,892 --> 00:17:06,926 the real you! 389 00:17:06,993 --> 00:17:08,394 (giggles) 390 00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:12,231 Oh, dear God, no! 391 00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:14,467 I look like bloody Churchill! 392 00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:16,969 (audience cheering) 393 00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:20,907 Shut your gobs, you wankers! 394 00:17:20,973 --> 00:17:22,141 (gasping) 395 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:25,177 Woo‐hoo! Wankers! 396 00:17:25,244 --> 00:17:28,214 Can't you see this show is just a cash grab? 397 00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:29,982 I'm only here because I lost my fortune 398 00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,184 suing people for saying things about me 399 00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:34,453 that were completely true. 400 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:36,856 (booing) 401 00:17:36,923 --> 00:17:38,624 Is this what I turned into? 402 00:17:38,691 --> 00:17:40,192 I'm greedy, I'm hateful, 403 00:17:40,259 --> 00:17:43,095 and my face looks like a syphilitic moon. 404 00:17:43,162 --> 00:17:45,131 Well, it's not your fault you got old. 405 00:17:45,197 --> 00:17:46,566 Sting is old. 406 00:17:46,632 --> 00:17:49,735 Old Sting's bloody gorgeous, and he knows it. 407 00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:52,471 (booing) 408 00:17:52,538 --> 00:17:53,806 Oh, boo‐hoo! 409 00:17:53,873 --> 00:17:58,077 You can jeer while I enjoy this pastrami on rye. 410 00:17:58,144 --> 00:17:59,745 (horrified gasps) 411 00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:01,347 But you're vegan! 412 00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:02,582 I was, 413 00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:05,484 until I found out veganism was invented by foreigners, 414 00:18:05,551 --> 00:18:08,487 of whom there are far too many on this planet! 415 00:18:08,554 --> 00:18:09,855 (gasping) 416 00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:12,458 That's right, I hate the foreign! 417 00:18:12,525 --> 00:18:15,261 Coming to this country and taking our jobs! 418 00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:17,730 Sleeping with our men! 419 00:18:17,797 --> 00:18:19,231 But you're a foreigner! 420 00:18:19,298 --> 00:18:22,535 And you took the job of sad, washed‐up rock star. 421 00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:26,072 No! You turned your back on veganism. 422 00:18:26,138 --> 00:18:29,208 And you're also a huge racist. 423 00:18:30,242 --> 00:18:33,713 ♪ Because everything is horrid except meat ♪ 424 00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:36,616 ♪ So slag off to you! ♪ 425 00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:39,352 (angry shouting) 426 00:18:39,418 --> 00:18:42,154 Lisa, dear, don't let him happen to you. 427 00:18:42,221 --> 00:18:44,290 Try not to sneer at everything. 428 00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:46,759 And listen to others, at least a bit. 429 00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,494 Perhaps one out of five times, 430 00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:50,763 but I can't tell you which times. 431 00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:52,298 Thanks, Quilloughby. 432 00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:54,033 You're the best imaginary friend 433 00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:56,836 a complicated eight‐year‐old could ever ask for. 434 00:18:56,902 --> 00:18:58,204 (sighs) 435 00:18:58,270 --> 00:19:00,406 But I think we both know it's time for you to go. 436 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,641 (sniffles) 437 00:19:01,707 --> 00:19:04,076 I'm going to miss you, 438 00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:06,278 you bloody wanker. 439 00:19:11,884 --> 00:19:13,185 Okay, okay, okay, 440 00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:15,821 I'm going to play a few songs off my new album. 441 00:19:15,888 --> 00:19:19,725 It's entitled Refugees? Again? 442 00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:22,762 (angry shouting) 443 00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:30,903 (horns honking) 444 00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:33,305 Stupid millennial traffic. 445 00:19:33,372 --> 00:19:34,940 RADIO ANNOUNCER: This just in: 446 00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,809 a full‐scale riot has broken out 447 00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:38,277 at the Bummershoot Festival. 448 00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,680 (gasps) But Lisa's in there! 449 00:19:40,746 --> 00:19:42,248 Who will save her? 450 00:19:42,314 --> 00:19:46,052 Did someone call for a truck guy? 451 00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:50,656 ♪ 452 00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,833 (chanting): 453 00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:02,868 Misplaced anger! 454 00:20:02,935 --> 00:20:05,171 Somebody save me! 455 00:20:13,612 --> 00:20:15,347 (engine revving) 456 00:20:15,414 --> 00:20:17,349 Torque, don't fail me now. 457 00:20:17,416 --> 00:20:19,685 ALL: Truck, truck, hooray! 458 00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:21,954 Truck, truck, hooray... 459 00:20:22,021 --> 00:20:23,355 (chuckles) 460 00:20:23,422 --> 00:20:26,158 Homer. Homer. Homer, wake up. 461 00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:28,094 He fell asleep while driving? 462 00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:31,597 No, we got stuck in traffic and ran out of gas, 463 00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:33,132 so Dad ate a garbage bag 464 00:20:33,199 --> 00:20:35,201 full of Mom's PB&Js and passed out. 465 00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:37,436 Thanks for walking over and getting me. 466 00:20:37,503 --> 00:20:40,206 Me and Trucky saved the day. 467 00:20:40,272 --> 00:20:42,374 Sure you did, Homer. 468 00:20:43,709 --> 00:20:46,212 Testosterone... 469 00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:49,982 I don't know what came over me, Mom. 470 00:20:50,049 --> 00:20:51,550 I was sullen, moody, 471 00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:54,086 thought everybody except me was an idiot... 472 00:20:54,453 --> 00:20:57,223 Wait, is that what being a teenager is like? 473 00:20:57,289 --> 00:20:59,125 Well, sometimes, sweetie. 474 00:20:59,191 --> 00:21:01,327 Were you ever like that? 475 00:21:01,393 --> 00:21:05,731 Blue mascara is who I am, Mom! 476 00:21:05,798 --> 00:21:09,869 You're just jealous because you can't pull off hot pants. 477 00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:11,670 For your information, I was going 478 00:21:11,737 --> 00:21:13,005 to break up with Homer. 479 00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:15,407 But if you hate him, he must be great. 480 00:21:15,474 --> 00:21:18,744 Honey, whatever phases you go through, 481 00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:20,846 I'll always be waiting for you 482 00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:23,415 on the other side of the slammed door. 483 00:21:23,482 --> 00:21:24,950 - Mm. - Mm. 484 00:21:25,317 --> 00:21:27,295 Captioning sponsored by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 485 00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:29,255 FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 486 00:21:29,321 --> 00:21:31,257 And FORD. We go further, so you can. 487 00:21:31,323 --> 00:21:33,526 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org