1 00:00:02,706 --> 00:00:07,147 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:08,818 --> 00:00:10,454 Mmm. When I die, 3 00:00:10,522 --> 00:00:12,726 we should totally get this sandwich place 4 00:00:12,792 --> 00:00:13,828 for my memorial. 5 00:00:13,895 --> 00:00:16,934 So good. Mmm. Can't wait. 6 00:00:17,001 --> 00:00:20,440 Oh, all these people loved Mr. Chase. 7 00:00:20,508 --> 00:00:22,946 His students are taking it so hard. 8 00:00:23,013 --> 00:00:25,585 Yeah, nobody grieves like theater kids. 9 00:00:25,652 --> 00:00:27,689 (wailing) 10 00:00:29,225 --> 00:00:30,795 (Marge gasps) 11 00:00:30,862 --> 00:00:32,298 This is my show! 12 00:00:32,364 --> 00:00:35,170 Why are they singing about computers? 13 00:00:35,237 --> 00:00:37,141 - It was a musical about Y2 - K, 14 00:00:37,207 --> 00:00:39,646 which was very scary back then. 15 00:00:39,713 --> 00:00:42,051 Scarier than anything we have now. 16 00:00:42,117 --> 00:00:44,556 The whole show takes place on New Year's Eve, 17 00:00:44,623 --> 00:00:47,428 ‐1999... ‐♪ Five, four, three ♪ 18 00:00:47,494 --> 00:00:50,200 ♪ Two, zero, zero, zero ♪ 19 00:00:50,267 --> 00:00:54,643 -♪ A midnight countdown to Y2 - K ♪ 20 00:00:54,710 --> 00:00:59,418 ♪ Five, four, three, two, will I be a zero? ♪ 21 00:00:59,485 --> 00:01:04,195 ♪ When tomorrow becomes today. ♪ 22 00:01:04,261 --> 00:01:06,065 Mom, which one are you? 23 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:08,303 I was right over here. 24 00:01:08,370 --> 00:01:11,075 In the wings, calling all the shots... 25 00:01:11,142 --> 00:01:14,115 as the stage manager. 26 00:01:14,181 --> 00:01:17,956 Mrs. Chase, I'm so sorry for your loss. 27 00:01:18,023 --> 00:01:19,325 Oh, thank you, dear. 28 00:01:19,392 --> 00:01:21,797 Say, look what I found when I was cleaning out 29 00:01:21,864 --> 00:01:23,534 - Franklin's office. - (gasps) 30 00:01:23,601 --> 00:01:25,037 My prompt book. 31 00:01:25,103 --> 00:01:27,074 This binder lists all the cues 32 00:01:27,141 --> 00:01:29,478 for the entire production. 33 00:01:29,546 --> 00:01:32,686 Oh, Franklin always said you were the heart of the show‐‐ 34 00:01:32,752 --> 00:01:36,392 that your stage managing was so... zealous. 35 00:01:36,459 --> 00:01:38,798 I definitely ran a tight ship. 36 00:01:38,864 --> 00:01:41,402 But in a fun way everyone loved, obviously. 37 00:01:41,469 --> 00:01:43,440 - Oh, yeah, totally. - Super fun. 38 00:01:43,507 --> 00:01:46,547 Of course, I would have loved to have been in the show, 39 00:01:46,613 --> 00:01:48,450 except I'm not much of a singer. 40 00:01:48,517 --> 00:01:52,525 But in my imagination, I've got the voice of a Disney princess. 41 00:01:52,592 --> 00:01:53,326 Oh... 42 00:01:53,393 --> 00:01:55,297 What a special time. 43 00:01:55,363 --> 00:01:58,169 I'd give anything to feel that magic again. 44 00:01:58,236 --> 00:02:01,209 ♪ ♪ 45 00:02:02,712 --> 00:02:05,852 (Disney princess voice): ♪ Script notes and sound cues ♪ 46 00:02:05,918 --> 00:02:08,557 ♪ Take me there again ♪ 47 00:02:08,624 --> 00:02:10,995 ♪ In my blacks in the backs of the wings ♪ 48 00:02:11,062 --> 00:02:13,366 ♪ So I'm not seen ♪ 49 00:02:15,403 --> 00:02:17,474 ♪ No one knows the magic ♪ 50 00:02:17,542 --> 00:02:22,417 ♪ That hides behind the scenes ♪ 51 00:02:23,253 --> 00:02:25,056 (regular voice): It's me! 52 00:02:25,123 --> 00:02:27,294 The cast said yes! 53 00:02:27,361 --> 00:02:29,900 We're putting on a musical! 54 00:02:29,966 --> 00:02:32,171 (Disney princess voice): ♪ Places, everybody ♪ 55 00:02:32,237 --> 00:02:34,643 ♪ It's time to start the show ♪ 56 00:02:34,709 --> 00:02:36,613 ♪ That's what actors need me to say ♪ 57 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:39,185 ♪ Otherwise, they wouldn't know where to go ♪ 58 00:02:39,251 --> 00:02:41,055 ♪ Cinch up the hemlines ♪ 59 00:02:41,122 --> 00:02:43,459 ♪ Sound check all the mics ♪ 60 00:02:43,527 --> 00:02:45,497 ♪ Close the door, ring the bell ♪ 61 00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:48,469 ♪ And bring down the house lights ♪ 62 00:02:48,537 --> 00:02:53,413 ♪ It's curtains up for Marge Bouvier ♪ 63 00:02:53,479 --> 00:02:56,452 ♪ 'Cause I'm once again the star ♪ 64 00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,389 ♪ Of the backstage ♪ 65 00:02:58,456 --> 00:03:00,393 Wow, you're the director? 66 00:03:00,460 --> 00:03:03,299 (regular voice): No, more important‐‐ the stage manager. 67 00:03:03,366 --> 00:03:05,571 - Ah! - Five minutes, guys! 68 00:03:05,638 --> 00:03:07,542 - Thank you, five. - Five minutes. 69 00:03:07,609 --> 00:03:10,882 I always used to love saying that, before... 70 00:03:10,948 --> 00:03:13,286 (Disney princess voice): ♪ The endless loads of laundry 71 00:03:13,353 --> 00:03:15,490 ♪ The dishes piled high ♪ 72 00:03:15,558 --> 00:03:17,494 ♪ The whining and complaining ♪ 73 00:03:17,562 --> 00:03:18,864 ‐♪ It's mine ♪ ‐♪ It's mine ♪ 74 00:03:18,931 --> 00:03:21,068 - BOTH: ♪ It's mine ♪ - (regular voice): Enough! 75 00:03:21,135 --> 00:03:26,445 (Disney princess voice): ♪ I'm returning to my theater family 76 00:03:26,513 --> 00:03:31,556 ♪ A revival of our fondest memories ♪ 77 00:03:31,623 --> 00:03:33,092 ‐♪ Singin'... ♪ ‐♪ Do ♪ 78 00:03:33,159 --> 00:03:34,829 ‐♪ Re ♪ ‐♪ Mi ♪ 79 00:03:34,896 --> 00:03:37,835 ‐♪ This ♪ ‐♪ Show ♪ ‐♪ 80 00:03:37,902 --> 00:03:40,140 ♪ The talk of the town ♪ 81 00:03:40,206 --> 00:03:43,413 ♪ A hit, a smash, the rage ♪ 82 00:03:43,479 --> 00:03:46,385 ♪ And there's nothing Springfield needs more ♪ 83 00:03:46,452 --> 00:03:48,022 ♪ Than a play ♪ 84 00:03:48,089 --> 00:03:49,325 (regular voice): Good! 85 00:03:49,391 --> 00:03:51,964 (Disney princess voice): ♪ 'Cause I'm once again the ♪ 86 00:03:52,030 --> 00:03:54,602 ♪ Appreciated, well‐respected, never, ever disconnected ♪ 87 00:03:54,669 --> 00:03:56,305 ♪ Nothing but the most impressive ♪ 88 00:03:56,372 --> 00:03:57,775 ♪ Everybody's dearest friended ♪ 89 00:03:57,842 --> 00:04:00,581 ♪ Star ♪ 90 00:04:00,648 --> 00:04:03,754 ♪ Of the backstage... ♪ 91 00:04:03,821 --> 00:04:05,791 ♪ She's the star, see how she shines ♪ 92 00:04:05,858 --> 00:04:09,498 ♪ She answers when we call for lines ♪ 93 00:04:09,566 --> 00:04:12,805 ♪ Places, everybody! ♪ 94 00:04:14,876 --> 00:04:17,515 Wow, honey, those dorks are so excited to be 95 00:04:17,582 --> 00:04:18,817 in your show again. 96 00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:19,884 And I will do everything 97 00:04:19,919 --> 00:04:21,523 I can to support you... 98 00:04:21,590 --> 00:04:23,092 while I'm at Moe's. 99 00:04:23,159 --> 00:04:24,529 Mwah. 100 00:04:24,596 --> 00:04:27,401 Sorry, Marge, but I got to drop out of the show. 101 00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:29,238 I broke my hip while singing and dancing 102 00:04:29,304 --> 00:04:30,875 about feeling young again. 103 00:04:31,777 --> 00:04:34,181 Say, Dad, what if you filled in for Lenny 104 00:04:34,248 --> 00:04:35,651 and joined Mom's musical? 105 00:04:35,718 --> 00:04:39,893 Yeah, then you'd be the most supportive husband ever. 106 00:04:39,959 --> 00:04:41,295 Great idea, kids. 107 00:04:41,362 --> 00:04:42,565 I'm all in, babe! 108 00:04:42,632 --> 00:04:45,437 One pair of super tight dance pants, please! 109 00:04:46,238 --> 00:04:47,608 (laughing) 110 00:04:47,675 --> 00:04:50,514 From this day forward, we are enemies. 111 00:04:50,581 --> 00:04:52,384 Forever and ever. 112 00:04:52,451 --> 00:04:54,254 Forever. 113 00:04:54,321 --> 00:04:55,624 MARGE: Okay, 114 00:04:55,691 --> 00:04:59,732 back on stage‐‐ it's just like we're teenagers again. 115 00:04:59,799 --> 00:05:02,037 Now let's start the rehearsal. 116 00:05:02,104 --> 00:05:03,306 Theater! 117 00:05:03,372 --> 00:05:05,711 Wait, we can't start without Sasha Reed. 118 00:05:05,778 --> 00:05:07,356 - She was the star of the show. - Mm‐hmm. 119 00:05:07,380 --> 00:05:09,084 She got into Julliard. 120 00:05:09,151 --> 00:05:10,186 (sighs) 121 00:05:10,253 --> 00:05:11,255 Sasha. (chuckles) 122 00:05:11,322 --> 00:05:12,892 You never forget your first diva. 123 00:05:12,959 --> 00:05:15,163 I'd love to know what she's been up to. 124 00:05:15,230 --> 00:05:17,067 Well, as your dutiful stage manager, 125 00:05:17,134 --> 00:05:20,875 I did reach out repeatedly, but never heard back. 126 00:05:20,941 --> 00:05:23,312 I guess we'll never know what happened 127 00:05:23,379 --> 00:05:25,985 after Sasha left little old Springfield 128 00:05:26,051 --> 00:05:27,420 for New York City. 129 00:05:27,487 --> 00:05:28,857 WOMAN: Never say never! 130 00:05:28,924 --> 00:05:31,061 Hello, old friends! 131 00:05:31,128 --> 00:05:33,099 Ah! It's Sasha! 132 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:36,673 Let me tell you all about it. 133 00:05:36,740 --> 00:05:39,011 ♪ It was a cold and rainy morning ♪ 134 00:05:39,077 --> 00:05:41,215 ♪ When I exited the bus ♪ 135 00:05:41,282 --> 00:05:43,486 ♪ I stepped into the city ♪ 136 00:05:43,554 --> 00:05:46,158 ♪ Everyone in such a rush ♪ 137 00:05:46,225 --> 00:05:48,496 ♪ I suppose I started singing ♪ 138 00:05:48,564 --> 00:05:50,668 ♪ Just to keep the chill at bay ♪ 139 00:05:50,734 --> 00:05:53,507 ♪ I guess I sounded something like ♪ 140 00:05:53,574 --> 00:05:56,980 ♪ This ♪ 141 00:05:57,047 --> 00:06:01,756 ♪ And that's when I heard a man say ♪ 142 00:06:01,823 --> 00:06:04,194 ♪ "That tone, that pitch ♪ 143 00:06:04,261 --> 00:06:05,998 ♪ "Your voice'll make us rich ♪ 144 00:06:06,065 --> 00:06:10,406 ♪ Stick with me, and you'll be destined to impress" ♪ 145 00:06:10,473 --> 00:06:12,110 ♪ And that's how Sasha became ♪ 146 00:06:12,177 --> 00:06:14,849 ♪ A massive success ♪ 147 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:16,018 ♪ Yes, Sasha ♪ 148 00:06:16,085 --> 00:06:18,523 ♪ Is a massive success ♪ 149 00:06:19,792 --> 00:06:20,861 (exclaiming) 150 00:06:20,928 --> 00:06:23,533 ♪ Now I dine on the veranda ♪ 151 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,738 ♪ With Lin‐Manuel Miranda ♪ 152 00:06:25,804 --> 00:06:28,577 ♪ Scrape meat off the bone with Patti LuPone ♪ 153 00:06:28,644 --> 00:06:30,179 ♪ Don't mention Glenn Close ♪ 154 00:06:30,246 --> 00:06:32,017 ♪ I eat Bananas Foster ♪ 155 00:06:32,083 --> 00:06:34,087 ♪ With my good friend Sutton Foster ♪ 156 00:06:34,154 --> 00:06:37,561 ♪ Thanks to Stephen Sondheim, who's the most gracious host ♪ 157 00:06:37,628 --> 00:06:40,701 ♪ Yes, I'm everything you thought I'd be ♪ 158 00:06:40,768 --> 00:06:42,838 ♪ When I left Springfield for the big city ♪ 159 00:06:42,905 --> 00:06:46,546 ♪ I've made it, I'm a cut above the rest ♪ 160 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,453 ♪ 'Cause Sasha has returned ♪ 161 00:06:50,521 --> 00:06:52,157 ♪ A massive ♪ 162 00:06:52,223 --> 00:06:56,231 ♪ Success... ♪ 163 00:06:57,968 --> 00:06:59,071 ♪ That's right ♪ 164 00:06:59,137 --> 00:07:00,473 ♪ I'm a Broadway ♪ 165 00:07:00,541 --> 00:07:05,617 ♪ Star! ♪ 166 00:07:08,222 --> 00:07:11,295 Oh, I can't believe Sasha came back. 167 00:07:11,362 --> 00:07:13,032 What a career! 168 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,639 I know a famous person that knows what's his name, 169 00:07:16,706 --> 00:07:18,677 who is she, and never heard of him! 170 00:07:19,444 --> 00:07:21,616 Okay, okay, everybody. 171 00:07:21,683 --> 00:07:24,989 It's so exciting that Sasha is a massive success, 172 00:07:25,056 --> 00:07:27,628 but we really need to walk through our blocking. 173 00:07:27,695 --> 00:07:29,231 Let's make it precise, gang! 174 00:07:29,297 --> 00:07:31,201 Blocking, so important. 175 00:07:31,268 --> 00:07:33,072 That's what Hal always told me. 176 00:07:33,139 --> 00:07:34,408 Hal Prince. 177 00:07:34,474 --> 00:07:35,844 Boom! Named it! 178 00:07:35,911 --> 00:07:38,617 But before we get into the technical stuff, 179 00:07:38,683 --> 00:07:42,558 we need to reconnect as an ensemblé. 180 00:07:42,625 --> 00:07:45,029 Let's all go to my lake house and do trust falls. 181 00:07:45,096 --> 00:07:47,601 But we have to carve out some time to run lines. 182 00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:51,375 (chuckles) Marge Bouvier, you have not changed a bit. 183 00:07:51,442 --> 00:07:53,647 Okay, Mom, we'll run lines, 184 00:07:53,713 --> 00:07:55,249 but don't wait up for us. 185 00:07:55,316 --> 00:07:56,485 Us? What do you mean? 186 00:07:56,553 --> 00:07:59,124 This bonding session is for the cast. 187 00:07:59,191 --> 00:08:00,994 You understand, right? 188 00:08:01,061 --> 00:08:02,063 Oh. 189 00:08:02,130 --> 00:08:04,234 Sure. Of course. 190 00:08:04,301 --> 00:08:06,472 Come on, friends! (laughs) 191 00:08:06,539 --> 00:08:09,612 I was wrong. Theater kids are super cool. 192 00:08:09,679 --> 00:08:10,981 Thanks for the hookup, honey. 193 00:08:12,785 --> 00:08:14,589 ♪ ♪ 194 00:08:19,264 --> 00:08:22,370 ♪ How will I stay alive? ♪ 195 00:08:22,437 --> 00:08:24,407 ♪ When all ♪ 196 00:08:24,474 --> 00:08:26,613 ♪ The computers think I died? ♪ 197 00:08:26,679 --> 00:08:29,284 ‐♪ How will I ♪ ‐♪ How will I ♪ 198 00:08:29,351 --> 00:08:31,321 ♪ Stay alive ♪ 199 00:08:31,388 --> 00:08:34,762 ♪ When all the clocks and the computers ♪ 200 00:08:34,829 --> 00:08:37,801 ♪ Think I died? ♪ 201 00:08:42,778 --> 00:08:45,551 Okay, the curtain‐raiser went a smidge long, 202 00:08:45,617 --> 00:08:47,387 so stay on your marks next time. 203 00:08:47,453 --> 00:08:49,357 - Take five! - Thank you, five. 204 00:08:49,424 --> 00:08:53,265 Anyway, I hope you all remember the best part of rehearsal... 205 00:08:53,332 --> 00:08:54,835 brownies! 206 00:08:54,902 --> 00:08:59,010 Are those Margie's Brownies with walnuts and M&Ms? 207 00:08:59,812 --> 00:09:01,749 It's true, I do matter. 208 00:09:01,816 --> 00:09:04,254 Look what else I'm included in. 209 00:09:04,321 --> 00:09:05,891 It's all from our shows. 210 00:09:05,958 --> 00:09:08,395 We were such a tight‐knit group. 211 00:09:08,462 --> 00:09:10,366 Remember the tightness of the knitting? 212 00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:12,938 (inhales) There's my old guitar pick. 213 00:09:13,005 --> 00:09:17,080 Oh, I haven't played guitar since I lost this! 214 00:09:18,382 --> 00:09:19,619 Still works! 215 00:09:20,887 --> 00:09:23,158 Oh, man, this takes me back... 216 00:09:23,225 --> 00:09:24,327 Remember, guys? 217 00:09:25,329 --> 00:09:27,266 ♪ Bonfires at Billy's ♪ 218 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:30,874 ♪ We'd talk about our dreams ♪ 219 00:09:34,147 --> 00:09:36,619 ♪ We'd get drunk and make out, ha ♪ 220 00:09:36,686 --> 00:09:38,957 ♪ Cause a scene ♪ 221 00:09:39,024 --> 00:09:41,028 Remind me who Billy was again? 222 00:09:41,094 --> 00:09:42,631 You know‐‐ Billy. 223 00:09:43,399 --> 00:09:45,403 ♪ Late nights at the diner ♪ 224 00:09:45,469 --> 00:09:48,475 ♪ We'd laugh and we'd cry ♪ 225 00:09:48,543 --> 00:09:50,747 Right. Uh‐huh. The diner. 226 00:09:50,814 --> 00:09:53,853 ♪ Smoking clove cigarettes ♪ 227 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:57,026 ♪ Ruthie serving us cheese fries ♪ 228 00:09:57,093 --> 00:09:58,763 Is that why you guys always smelled 229 00:09:58,830 --> 00:09:59,899 like burnt cinnamon? 230 00:09:59,965 --> 00:10:02,905 ♪ Climbing the water tower ♪ 231 00:10:02,971 --> 00:10:05,042 ♪ Drunk on whiskey sours ♪ 232 00:10:05,109 --> 00:10:07,815 ♪ Stealing the Lard Lad sign ♪ 233 00:10:07,881 --> 00:10:10,352 - That was you guys? - Yeah. 234 00:10:10,419 --> 00:10:12,223 ♪ Remember the times ♪ 235 00:10:12,290 --> 00:10:14,127 ♪ The best times ♪ 236 00:10:14,194 --> 00:10:16,364 ♪ Of our lives ♪ 237 00:10:16,431 --> 00:10:20,206 ♪ We had nothing but times ♪ 238 00:10:21,308 --> 00:10:24,047 ♪ Remember the times ♪ 239 00:10:24,114 --> 00:10:27,120 Okay, I might've missed some of those specific moments, 240 00:10:27,186 --> 00:10:30,025 but I'm sure I'll remember all the other ones. 241 00:10:30,092 --> 00:10:31,896 What else? 242 00:10:33,365 --> 00:10:35,302 ♪ The kegger at Marge's ♪ 243 00:10:35,369 --> 00:10:37,473 ♪ What an epic night ♪ 244 00:10:37,541 --> 00:10:39,745 Wait, there was a party at my house? 245 00:10:39,812 --> 00:10:41,281 Where was I? 246 00:10:41,348 --> 00:10:44,420 ♪ She was at a tech run‐through ♪ 247 00:10:44,487 --> 00:10:46,626 ♪ Nowhere in sight ♪ 248 00:10:46,692 --> 00:10:49,932 Guys, that's like, pretty messed up. 249 00:10:50,834 --> 00:10:52,170 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 250 00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:55,142 ♪ I was at that super killer party, too ♪ 251 00:10:55,209 --> 00:10:56,979 You weren't even in the show. 252 00:10:57,046 --> 00:10:58,616 ♪ Yeah, but I was cool ♪ 253 00:10:58,683 --> 00:10:59,919 (grunts) 254 00:10:59,985 --> 00:11:01,354 ♪ Lenny fell off the roof ♪ 255 00:11:01,421 --> 00:11:03,693 ‐What? ‐♪ Marge's parents got sued ♪ 256 00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:06,732 ♪ And had to file for bankruptcy ♪ 257 00:11:06,799 --> 00:11:08,937 Is that why I couldn't go away to college? 258 00:11:09,003 --> 00:11:10,674 ♪ Remember the time ♪ 259 00:11:10,740 --> 00:11:13,412 ♪ When Jackie died ♪ 260 00:11:13,478 --> 00:11:15,015 Wait, I thought Jackie moved. 261 00:11:15,082 --> 00:11:17,486 - ♪ No one saw the signs ♪ - (gasps) 262 00:11:17,554 --> 00:11:19,123 ♪ Together we cried ♪ 263 00:11:19,190 --> 00:11:21,996 ♪ And then we made it about ourselves ♪ 264 00:11:22,063 --> 00:11:23,967 ♪ When the reporter came ♪ 265 00:11:24,033 --> 00:11:26,304 ‐What?! ‐♪ He worked for The Times ♪ 266 00:11:26,371 --> 00:11:27,371 Which one? 267 00:11:27,406 --> 00:11:29,678 ♪ The New York Times ♪ 268 00:11:29,745 --> 00:11:31,883 ♪ Such timey times ♪ 269 00:11:31,949 --> 00:11:33,720 How'd I miss all of this? 270 00:11:33,786 --> 00:11:37,594 ♪ We were all together. ♪ 271 00:11:37,661 --> 00:11:39,264 Except me. 272 00:11:42,671 --> 00:11:44,875 (Disney princess voice): ♪ Script notes and sound cues ♪ 273 00:11:44,942 --> 00:11:48,583 ♪ They never saw me as a friend ♪ 274 00:11:48,650 --> 00:11:51,656 ♪ In my blacks in the backs of the wings ♪ 275 00:11:51,722 --> 00:11:54,895 ♪ I was unseen ♪ 276 00:11:56,699 --> 00:11:59,571 ♪ So much for the magic ♪ 277 00:11:59,638 --> 00:12:04,815 ♪ No one wants old Marjorie. ♪ 278 00:12:07,286 --> 00:12:08,823 (sobbing) 279 00:12:08,890 --> 00:12:12,496 (regular voice): I was unpopular and never knew! 280 00:12:12,564 --> 00:12:14,467 All my best memories are ruined. 281 00:12:14,535 --> 00:12:17,473 I wish I had never done this stupid musical again. 282 00:12:17,541 --> 00:12:21,448 As soon as Sasha showed up, it was like I didn't exist. 283 00:12:21,515 --> 00:12:23,251 I never liked that Sasha Reed. 284 00:12:23,318 --> 00:12:25,890 Taking pop out of the fridge without asking... 285 00:12:25,957 --> 00:12:27,426 getting us sued... 286 00:12:28,696 --> 00:12:30,499 Of course! It's all Sasha's fault. 287 00:12:30,567 --> 00:12:33,773 Someone ought to teach that Broadway big shot a lesson. 288 00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:36,746 Mom, do you still have a computer? 289 00:12:36,812 --> 00:12:40,185 (dial‐up modem whining) 290 00:12:40,252 --> 00:12:43,960 Last night I made some very interesting discoveries, 291 00:12:44,027 --> 00:12:47,968 requiring the printing of a revised playbill. 292 00:12:48,035 --> 00:12:49,203 (clears throat) 293 00:12:49,404 --> 00:12:52,577 (Disney princess voice): ♪ I'll refer you to page three ♪ 294 00:12:52,644 --> 00:12:55,215 ♪ To an updated biography ♪ 295 00:12:55,282 --> 00:12:57,153 ♪ Of which you must see ♪ 296 00:12:57,219 --> 00:12:59,858 ♪ Certain to change your view ♪ 297 00:12:59,925 --> 00:13:04,400 ♪ Of the beloved ingenue ♪ 298 00:13:05,369 --> 00:13:06,839 ♪ Sasha! Poof ♪ 299 00:13:06,906 --> 00:13:08,241 ♪ The truth ♪ 300 00:13:09,177 --> 00:13:12,717 ♪ She's never been in a Broadway musical or play? ♪ 301 00:13:12,784 --> 00:13:17,093 ♪ She was never in Pippin, Show Boat, or Cabaret? ♪ 302 00:13:17,159 --> 00:13:20,700 ♪ She didn't sign autographs at a stage door‐a? ♪ 303 00:13:20,767 --> 00:13:25,577 ♪ She worked at the Herald Square Sephora? ♪ 304 00:13:25,643 --> 00:13:28,081 ♪ Lost hope, gave up and moved the day ♪ 305 00:13:28,148 --> 00:13:31,555 ♪ She didn't get a callback for Hairspray ♪ 306 00:13:31,622 --> 00:13:34,127 ♪ She's a fraudway baby ♪ 307 00:13:34,193 --> 00:13:35,730 ♪ A phony, a fake ♪ 308 00:13:35,797 --> 00:13:39,571 ♪ She ain't got what it takes ♪ 309 00:13:39,638 --> 00:13:41,441 ♪ She's a fraudway baby ♪ 310 00:13:41,509 --> 00:13:43,880 ♪ She doesn't know Sutton Foster ♪ 311 00:13:43,946 --> 00:13:45,449 ♪ This broad's an imposter ♪ 312 00:13:45,517 --> 00:13:48,756 ♪ She's had you wrapped around her finger ♪ 313 00:13:48,823 --> 00:13:50,459 ♪ For days ♪ 314 00:13:50,527 --> 00:13:53,064 ♪ But she's nothing but a hair‐extentioned ♪ 315 00:13:53,131 --> 00:13:55,002 ♪ Makeup‐slinging, Botox‐forehead ♪ 316 00:13:55,068 --> 00:13:56,070 ♪ Lying, cheating ♪ 317 00:13:56,137 --> 00:13:57,137 ♪ Baby fraudway... ♪ 318 00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:04,287 ♪ ♪ 319 00:14:05,557 --> 00:14:07,226 So you don't know the people 320 00:14:07,293 --> 00:14:09,998 you said you knew but who are they? 321 00:14:10,065 --> 00:14:11,869 Marge Bouvier, you're... 322 00:14:11,936 --> 00:14:13,171 mean! 323 00:14:13,238 --> 00:14:15,275 (sobbing) 324 00:14:16,612 --> 00:14:20,219 Well, I'm sure you're all as angry at Sasha as I am, 325 00:14:20,285 --> 00:14:22,356 but now we can wipe the slate clean 326 00:14:22,423 --> 00:14:25,763 and really come together as a theater family. 327 00:14:25,830 --> 00:14:28,134 Without Sasha, there's no show. 328 00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:31,909 You ruined everything, you... techie! 329 00:14:31,976 --> 00:14:34,013 But, w‐w‐wait. She made it all up. 330 00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:35,750 She's a liar! 331 00:14:35,817 --> 00:14:37,687 I think this is the kind of thing 332 00:14:37,754 --> 00:14:41,528 that makes people not want to invite you to stuff. 333 00:14:41,595 --> 00:14:43,031 (growls) 334 00:14:48,609 --> 00:14:50,947 Stupid, ungrateful cast. 335 00:14:51,014 --> 00:14:52,917 Did you sleep at all last night? 336 00:14:52,984 --> 00:14:54,888 "We don't care that Sasha's a liar." 337 00:14:54,955 --> 00:14:56,725 "We still love her more than you." 338 00:14:56,792 --> 00:14:59,263 Mo‐om! Bart replaced my Kashi cereal 339 00:14:59,330 --> 00:15:01,835 with woodchips from the hamster cage! 340 00:15:01,902 --> 00:15:04,140 So? You didn't notice till I told you. 341 00:15:04,206 --> 00:15:05,677 - (growls) - (yelps) 342 00:15:05,743 --> 00:15:07,947 - What's wrong with Mom? - Well, kids, your mother has 343 00:15:08,014 --> 00:15:10,853 severely pissed off all the theater weirdos‐‐ 344 00:15:10,920 --> 00:15:12,156 of which I am now one‐‐ 345 00:15:12,222 --> 00:15:14,628 but she can't see it's her fault. 346 00:15:14,695 --> 00:15:16,532 So... are you gonna tell her? 347 00:15:16,598 --> 00:15:21,341 Indeed I am, and there's only one way to do it. 348 00:15:21,407 --> 00:15:22,577 ♪ ♪ 349 00:15:24,246 --> 00:15:26,250 ♪ When your partner's in a tizzy ♪ 350 00:15:26,317 --> 00:15:28,188 ♪ Flossing till she's dizzy ♪ 351 00:15:28,254 --> 00:15:31,294 ♪ Clearly in the wrong, but certain she's right ♪ 352 00:15:31,361 --> 00:15:33,899 ♪ It's your responsibility ♪ 353 00:15:33,966 --> 00:15:35,536 ♪ To imply her culpability ♪ 354 00:15:35,603 --> 00:15:39,009 ♪ In a way that doesn't instigate a fight ♪ 355 00:15:39,076 --> 00:15:42,149 - (grumbles) - Whoops. 356 00:15:42,216 --> 00:15:44,755 ♪ Don't escalate the situation ♪ 357 00:15:44,821 --> 00:15:46,391 ♪ Or add further complication ♪ 358 00:15:46,457 --> 00:15:49,463 ♪ Mince your words, so as never to encroach ♪ 359 00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:52,035 ♪ Deliver your advice ♪ 360 00:15:52,102 --> 00:15:53,639 ♪ But make sure to do it nice ♪ 361 00:15:53,706 --> 00:15:57,112 ♪ For it's best to use a delicate approach ♪ 362 00:15:58,014 --> 00:15:59,785 Marge, darling... 363 00:15:59,851 --> 00:16:01,354 Leave me alone! 364 00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:03,626 Marge, listen! I'm being delicate! 365 00:16:03,692 --> 00:16:05,462 Oh, are you? 366 00:16:06,464 --> 00:16:08,745 ♪ Now, I know you may think you were just in your actions ♪ 367 00:16:08,769 --> 00:16:10,849 ♪ But it makes my heart sink to see your infractions ♪ 368 00:16:10,907 --> 00:16:12,787 ♪ Your feelings were hurt, but it's malice you blurt ♪ 369 00:16:12,811 --> 00:16:15,516 ♪ Your transaction compels a retraction ♪ 370 00:16:17,887 --> 00:16:19,591 Oh, you're right, Homie. 371 00:16:19,658 --> 00:16:21,027 It's all my fault. 372 00:16:21,093 --> 00:16:24,266 I did the one thing a stage manager must never do: 373 00:16:24,333 --> 00:16:27,372 I put myself before the show. 374 00:16:28,475 --> 00:16:29,475 You see, kids? 375 00:16:29,511 --> 00:16:32,216 ♪ It's best to use a delicate ♪ 376 00:16:32,282 --> 00:16:33,652 ♪ Approach. ♪ 377 00:16:33,719 --> 00:16:34,955 (toilet flushes) 378 00:16:35,021 --> 00:16:36,825 I have to make things right. 379 00:16:36,892 --> 00:16:38,161 You need to let me see 380 00:16:38,228 --> 00:16:41,234 the cast‐only text chain. 381 00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:42,504 Yeah, I don't know. 382 00:16:42,570 --> 00:16:44,975 It's really not cool for me to share it. 383 00:16:45,041 --> 00:16:47,514 Plus, you wouldn't get any of the jokes. 384 00:16:47,580 --> 00:16:49,250 You might want to skip over the stuff 385 00:16:49,316 --> 00:16:50,620 with your name in it. 386 00:16:50,686 --> 00:16:51,955 Sasha hasn't left town. 387 00:16:52,022 --> 00:16:53,659 There's still time. 388 00:16:54,928 --> 00:16:56,197 (sniffles) 389 00:16:56,264 --> 00:16:58,167 Why would Marge do that to me? 390 00:16:58,234 --> 00:17:00,138 I was never mean to her. 391 00:17:00,205 --> 00:17:01,675 I never even talked to her! 392 00:17:01,742 --> 00:17:04,648 Yeah, we don't care that you only sell makeup 393 00:17:04,714 --> 00:17:07,185 and that you're a huge liar. 394 00:17:07,252 --> 00:17:09,490 I miss high school. 395 00:17:09,558 --> 00:17:12,129 Remember the night of the cast party? 396 00:17:12,195 --> 00:17:15,402 You and me... in the hot tub? 397 00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:17,740 That night really happened? 398 00:17:17,807 --> 00:17:19,143 I thought I imagined it. 399 00:17:19,209 --> 00:17:20,713 It was real. 400 00:17:20,780 --> 00:17:23,251 And I've never had better. 401 00:17:23,318 --> 00:17:24,921 (grunts) Ah... 402 00:17:24,988 --> 00:17:27,594 Sasha! Sasha, I'm so sorry. 403 00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:29,496 Once my husband sang and danced to me 404 00:17:29,564 --> 00:17:32,035 about what I did, I felt terrible. 405 00:17:32,102 --> 00:17:34,774 I acted like such a crazy teenager. 406 00:17:34,841 --> 00:17:37,412 All I wanted to do was recapture my glory days, 407 00:17:37,479 --> 00:17:39,884 when I could've become anything... 408 00:17:39,951 --> 00:17:41,387 instead of what I really am, 409 00:17:41,454 --> 00:17:43,892 a floor manager at Sephora. 410 00:17:43,959 --> 00:17:45,028 (sighs) 411 00:17:45,095 --> 00:17:46,263 Sales associate. 412 00:17:46,330 --> 00:17:49,303 I guess we both wanted to be stars again. 413 00:17:50,105 --> 00:17:51,040 There she is. 414 00:17:51,107 --> 00:17:52,175 Probably called us here 415 00:17:52,242 --> 00:17:54,013 to expose the lies the rest of us put 416 00:17:54,079 --> 00:17:55,650 in our playbill bios. 417 00:17:55,716 --> 00:17:56,952 What lies? 418 00:17:57,019 --> 00:17:59,123 I am "thrilled to reprise my role 419 00:17:59,189 --> 00:18:01,628 - as Steve/ - Ensemble." 420 00:18:01,695 --> 00:18:03,766 I was supposed to manage the stage, 421 00:18:03,832 --> 00:18:07,139 but instead I just managed to screw everything up. 422 00:18:07,205 --> 00:18:09,143 But there's still time to put on the best show 423 00:18:09,209 --> 00:18:11,147 of the latter part of our lives. 424 00:18:11,213 --> 00:18:13,752 What do you say? Should we give it a try? 425 00:18:13,819 --> 00:18:15,155 Oh, why should we? 426 00:18:15,221 --> 00:18:18,394 What has trying ever gotten anyone? 427 00:18:18,461 --> 00:18:20,498 ♪ ♪ 428 00:18:21,868 --> 00:18:23,539 ♪ I could've been a crooner ♪ 429 00:18:23,605 --> 00:18:25,810 ♪ Star of stage and screen ♪ 430 00:18:25,876 --> 00:18:27,312 ♪ But I'd just as sooner ♪ 431 00:18:27,379 --> 00:18:31,020 ♪ Drink away my dream ♪ 432 00:18:31,087 --> 00:18:33,157 - ♪ Never try. ♪ - SASHA: Stop! 433 00:18:33,224 --> 00:18:35,295 That's the saddest thing I've ever heard. 434 00:18:35,361 --> 00:18:39,637 Barney, nobody needs to do this show more than you. 435 00:18:39,704 --> 00:18:43,177 ♪ Except me! ♪ 436 00:18:43,244 --> 00:18:44,581 - (cheering) - Yay! 437 00:18:44,647 --> 00:18:45,950 ♪ ♪ 438 00:18:46,016 --> 00:18:48,054 It's a full house, so... 439 00:18:48,121 --> 00:18:50,993 ♪ Places, everybody. ♪ 440 00:18:51,060 --> 00:18:53,966 Marge, when I'm onstage and it's not my turn to talk, 441 00:18:54,032 --> 00:18:56,505 - can I look at my phone? - No. 442 00:18:58,509 --> 00:19:01,380 ♪ ♪ 443 00:19:13,237 --> 00:19:14,741 It's almost midnight. 444 00:19:14,808 --> 00:19:16,377 What's going to happen? 445 00:19:20,185 --> 00:19:21,120 Oops. 446 00:19:21,187 --> 00:19:22,623 Five, four... 447 00:19:22,690 --> 00:19:25,596 Three, two, one! 448 00:19:27,399 --> 00:19:29,704 - (cheering) - So the show just ends? 449 00:19:29,771 --> 00:19:30,873 What a cop‐out! 450 00:19:30,940 --> 00:19:32,677 At least at the endof Rent you get to see 451 00:19:32,743 --> 00:19:34,246 Mimi come back to life. 452 00:19:34,313 --> 00:19:36,150 This is just lazy. 453 00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:39,289 - ♪ ♪ - (cheering) 454 00:19:41,427 --> 00:19:44,366 Marge, thanks for reminding me how good it feels 455 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:46,671 to be a big fish in a small pond. 456 00:19:46,738 --> 00:19:48,842 I guess that's why you never left. 457 00:19:48,909 --> 00:19:50,779 Actually, I think it was because my parents 458 00:19:50,846 --> 00:19:53,785 couldn't afford college after a lawsuit from a party 459 00:19:53,852 --> 00:19:56,423 you threw at my house but didn't invite me to. 460 00:19:56,490 --> 00:19:59,296 Such timey times. 461 00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,271 (sighs) 462 00:20:03,337 --> 00:20:05,441 Oh, my God, it's really her. 463 00:20:05,509 --> 00:20:07,045 It's Marge Bouvier. 464 00:20:07,112 --> 00:20:09,684 Just ask her. 465 00:20:10,686 --> 00:20:12,990 Um, would you please sign my prompt bible? 466 00:20:14,259 --> 00:20:15,395 You know me? 467 00:20:15,461 --> 00:20:17,767 You're a stage‐managing icon! 468 00:20:20,539 --> 00:20:22,242 Would you go to the diner with us? 469 00:20:22,309 --> 00:20:24,346 We'd die to hear some of your stories. 470 00:20:24,413 --> 00:20:26,584 Invited to the diner. 471 00:20:26,651 --> 00:20:28,822 I'm getting cheese fries! 472 00:20:28,889 --> 00:20:30,325 ♪ ♪ 473 00:20:30,391 --> 00:20:32,128 Cast party at Marge's house! 474 00:20:32,195 --> 00:20:33,932 - (Sasha laughs) - BARNEY: All right! 475 00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:35,736 KIRK: Theater! 476 00:20:49,096 --> 00:20:52,636 - Y2 - K CAST: ♪ Five, four, three, two, zero, zero, zero ♪ 477 00:20:52,703 --> 00:20:54,206 ♪ A new millennium ♪ 478 00:20:54,272 --> 00:20:57,112 ♪ But who will I be? ♪ 479 00:20:57,178 --> 00:20:59,082 ♪ Five, four, three, two ♪ 480 00:20:59,149 --> 00:21:01,420 ♪ Way too many zeros ♪ 481 00:21:01,487 --> 00:21:03,491 ♪ What will the computers ♪ 482 00:21:03,558 --> 00:21:05,228 ♪ Do to me? ♪ 483 00:21:05,294 --> 00:21:07,165 ♪ Will there be blackouts? ♪ 484 00:21:07,232 --> 00:21:08,502 ♪ Chaos? ♪ 485 00:21:08,568 --> 00:21:10,506 ♪ Motherboards exploding? ♪ 486 00:21:10,572 --> 00:21:12,643 ♪ Glitches and crashes? ♪ 487 00:21:12,710 --> 00:21:14,479 ♪ A run on the banks? ♪ 488 00:21:14,547 --> 00:21:16,483 ♪ Will I have a mortgage? ♪ 489 00:21:16,551 --> 00:21:19,524 ♪ A family? A boy and a girl? ♪ 490 00:21:19,590 --> 00:21:24,032 ♪ What happens to a two‐digit soul ♪ 491 00:21:24,099 --> 00:21:27,907 ♪ In a four‐digit world? ♪ 492 00:21:29,042 --> 00:21:30,979 Shh!