1
00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:10,944
( bell ringing )

2
00:00:14,415 --> 00:00:15,849
D-OHH!

3
00:00:15,883 --> 00:00:16,884
( screams )

4
00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:36,904
( jazzy scales )

5
00:00:36,937 --> 00:00:39,006
LISA, WILL YOU
KEEP IT DOWN?

6
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:41,209
I'M MAKING A CRANK PHONE CALL
TO PRINCIPAL SKINNER.

7
00:00:41,242 --> 00:00:43,844
Well, as a matter of fact,
my refrigerator wasn't running.

8
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:45,746
You've spared me
quite a bit of spoilage.

9
00:00:45,779 --> 00:00:46,714
Thank you, anonymous young man.

10
00:00:46,747 --> 00:00:47,881
D-OHH!

11
00:00:47,915 --> 00:00:49,617
IT'S MY ROOM
AND I CAN DO WHAT I WANT.

12
00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:50,718
OH, YEAH?

13
00:00:50,751 --> 00:00:53,321
WELL, I CAN DO WHAT I WANT
IN MY ROOM.

14
00:00:54,755 --> 00:00:55,789
( jazzy scales )

15
00:00:55,823 --> 00:00:57,057
( thumping )

16
00:00:57,091 --> 00:00:58,126
BART, QUIT IT!

17
00:00:59,793 --> 00:01:02,062
I CAN KEEP THIS UP ALL DAY.

18
00:01:06,100 --> 00:01:07,935
( sighs )

19
00:01:10,804 --> 00:01:11,905
( saxophone playing )

20
00:01:11,939 --> 00:01:13,241
LISA, STOP THE RACKET.

21
00:01:13,274 --> 00:01:15,075
I'M TRYING TO FIX
YOUR MOTHER'S CAMERA.

22
00:01:15,109 --> 00:01:18,146
EASY, EASY...

23
00:01:19,347 --> 00:01:20,381
HMM...

24
00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:22,082
I'M GOING TO NEED
A BIGGER DRILL.

25
00:01:27,255 --> 00:01:28,156
( sighs )

26
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:34,995
MY, THESE SEAS ARE
CERTAINLY HEAVING.

27
00:01:35,028 --> 00:01:39,233
WELL, NO MORE THAN YOUR
BOUNTIFUL BOSOM, MILADY.

28
00:01:39,267 --> 00:01:40,901
( giggling )

29
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:43,171
DOES THAT EARRING
MEAN YOU'RE A PIRATE?

30
00:01:43,204 --> 00:01:44,572
KIND OF.

31
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:47,441
AH... THE SEAS HAVE QUIETED.

32
00:01:47,475 --> 00:01:50,511
AND ONLY IN THE SWEET
EMBRACE OF QUIETUDE

33
00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:52,680
CAN TWO LOVERS TRULY BE...

34
00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:54,114
( saxophone playing )

35
00:01:54,148 --> 00:01:55,082
OOH, SUCH NOISE.

36
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:57,185
WELL, I'M DONE
FOR THE EVENING.

37
00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:01,789
LISA, STOP
BLOWING MY SEX...

38
00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:02,923
I MEAN, STOP
BLOWING YOUR SAX.

39
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,425
YOUR SAX, STOP IT.

40
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:07,528
MOM,
I'M AUDITIONING FOR FIRST CHAIR
IN THE SCHOOL BAND.

41
00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:09,129
AND I'VE GOT TO PRACTICE.

42
00:02:09,163 --> 00:02:11,699
I'M SORRY, BUT I SACRIFICED
A VERY EXPENSIVE CAMERA

43
00:02:11,732 --> 00:02:13,367
JUST TO GET SOME QUIET TIME.

44
00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:19,173
FINE.
I'LL PLAY OUTSIDE.

45
00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:24,645
HEY, WHY THAT SOUNDS
LIKE GABRIEL'S TRUMPET.

46
00:02:24,678 --> 00:02:26,180
YOU KNOW THAT MEANS, KIDS.

47
00:02:26,214 --> 00:02:29,183
YAY! JUDGMENT DAY!

48
00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:33,387
45 SECONDS TILL PENCILS DOWN.

49
00:02:33,421 --> 00:02:36,324
LISA, WHAT'S THE ANSWER
TO NUMBER SEVEN?

50
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:37,225
SORRY, RALPH.

51
00:02:37,258 --> 00:02:38,326
THAT WOULD DEFEAT
THE PURPOSE OF TESTING

52
00:02:38,359 --> 00:02:41,529
AS A MEANS
OF STUDENT EVALUATION.

53
00:02:41,562 --> 00:02:43,231
MY CAT'S NAME
IS MITTENS.

54
00:02:43,264 --> 00:02:46,467
THREE, TWO, ONE, AND
THAT'S PENCILS DOWN.

55
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,901
( all moaning )

56
00:02:47,935 --> 00:02:50,971
NOW, HERE'S AN ORAL
EXTRA CREDIT QUESTION.

57
00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:52,172
WHAT WAS
CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS

58
00:02:52,206 --> 00:02:55,075
ACTUALLY LOOKING FOR
WHEN HE DISCOVERED AMERICA?

59
00:02:55,108 --> 00:02:56,377
OOH, OOH!

60
00:02:56,410 --> 00:02:58,512
ANYONE BESIDES
LISA FOR A CHANGE?

61
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,383
RALPH, THIS BETTER
NOT BE ABOUT YOUR CAT.

62
00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:04,051
OH, ALL RIGHT,
LISA...

63
00:03:04,084 --> 00:03:05,052
COLUMBUS WAS LOOKING

64
00:03:05,085 --> 00:03:06,487
FOR A PASSAGE TO INDIA.

65
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,256
OH, CORRECT, ALLISON.

66
00:03:08,289 --> 00:03:10,224
AND ON YOUR VERY
FIRST DAY IN OUR CLASS.

67
00:03:10,258 --> 00:03:12,059
AND DURING A SUBSEQUENT VOYAGE

68
00:03:12,092 --> 00:03:14,695
COLUMBUS FOUND WHAT IS NOW
THE CONTINENT OF SOUTH AMERICA.

69
00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:16,264
YOWEE.

70
00:03:16,297 --> 00:03:18,366
I NEVER MADE
MISS HOOVER "YOWEE."

71
00:03:20,768 --> 00:03:23,003
HI, ALLISON.
I'M LISA SIMPSON.

72
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,905
OH, IT'S GREAT
TO FINALLY MEET SOMEONE

73
00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:27,575
WHO CONVERSES ABOVE
THE NORMAL EIGHT-YEAR-OLD LEVEL.

74
00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,042
ACTUALLY, I'M SEVEN.

75
00:03:29,076 --> 00:03:30,444
I WAS JUST SKIPPED AHEAD

76
00:03:30,478 --> 00:03:32,346
BECAUSE I WAS GETTING BORED
WITH THE FIRST GRADE.

77
00:03:32,380 --> 00:03:34,147
YOU'RE YOUNGER THAN ME TOO?

78
00:03:39,587 --> 00:03:40,788
ARE YOU HYPERVENTILATING?

79
00:03:40,821 --> 00:03:44,224
NO. I JUST LIKE
TO SMELL MY LUNCH.

80
00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:46,927
GEE, I NEVER MET ANYONE
WHO SKIPPED A GRADE BEFORE.

81
00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,262
I'M SURPRISED YOU
HAVEN'T BEEN SKIPPED.

82
00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:49,730
YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY
SMART ENOUGH.

83
00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:52,065
WELL, I'M SURE I COULD HAVE

84
00:03:52,099 --> 00:03:55,469
BUT I'D HATE TO LEAVE BEHIND
ALL MY WONDERFUL FRIENDS.

85
00:03:55,503 --> 00:03:57,237
OUT OF THE WAY,
BRAIN QUEEN.

86
00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:58,406
AH!

87
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:01,074
HEY, SARAH.

88
00:04:01,108 --> 00:04:02,410
WELL, I GOT TO GO.

89
00:04:02,443 --> 00:04:04,912
I HAVE TO PRACTICE
FOR BAND AUDITIONS.

90
00:04:04,945 --> 00:04:06,980
ME TOO. HEY, WHAT INSTRUMENT DO
YOU PLAY?

91
00:04:07,014 --> 00:04:07,815
THE SAX.

92
00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:08,916
ME TOO.

93
00:04:08,949 --> 00:04:10,551
I'M GOING FOR
FIRST CHAIR THIS YEAR.

94
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:11,485
ME TOO.

95
00:04:11,519 --> 00:04:13,287
WOW, WITH SO MUCH
IN COMMON

96
00:04:13,321 --> 00:04:15,456
I'M SURE WE'LL BE
THE BEST OF FRIENDS.

97
00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:16,424
ME TOO.

98
00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:17,525
( half-heartedly )
ME TOO.

99
00:04:21,529 --> 00:04:22,996
HURRY UP AND FINISH EATING.

100
00:04:23,030 --> 00:04:24,565
YOU'RE STEERING FINE, BOY.

101
00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:25,799
HARD TO THE RIGHT.

102
00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:26,800
HARD TO THE LEFT.

103
00:04:26,834 --> 00:04:28,769
CAT! DEER! OLD MAN!

104
00:04:28,802 --> 00:04:30,003
( screaming )

105
00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:32,239
JACKKNIFED SUGAR TRUCK.

106
00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:33,206
SUGAR?

107
00:04:37,311 --> 00:04:39,447
DON'T WORRY, BUDDY.
HERE'S A QUARTER.

108
00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:40,348
CALL FOR HELP
AT THE NEAREST PHONE.

109
00:04:40,381 --> 00:04:41,615
I'LL KEEP AN EYE
ON THINGS HERE.

110
00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:45,285
IF ONLY THIS SUGAR WERE
AS SWEET AS YOU, SIR.

111
00:04:45,319 --> 00:04:47,187
HOMER, THAT WAS
DOWNRIGHT DECENT OF YOU.

112
00:04:47,220 --> 00:04:49,256
WE HIT THE JACKPOT HERE!

113
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:52,493
WHITE GOLD, TEXAS TEA...

114
00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:53,361
SWEETENER.

115
00:04:54,495 --> 00:04:57,130
( grunting )

116
00:04:57,164 --> 00:04:58,766
DAD, ISN'T THIS STEALING?

117
00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,468
READ YOUR TOWN CHARTER, BOY.

118
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:02,436
"IF FOODSTUFF
SHOULD TOUCH THE GROUND

119
00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:03,504
"SAID FOODSTUFF

120
00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:05,873
SHALL BE TURNED
OVER TO THE VILLAGE IDIOT."

121
00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:08,308
SINCE I DON'T SEE HIM AROUND,
START SHOVELING.

122
00:05:09,477 --> 00:05:10,478
( stifled breathing )

123
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:13,481
( sighs )

124
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:14,314
MOM?

125
00:05:14,348 --> 00:05:15,649
WHAT? WHAT?

126
00:05:15,683 --> 00:05:17,885
WHY AM I STILL ROTTING AWAY
IN THE SECOND GRADE

127
00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:19,387
INSTEAD OF BEING SKIPPED AHEAD?

128
00:05:19,420 --> 00:05:20,721
I DON'T KNOW, HONEY.

129
00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:22,556
I GUESS THAT'S THE SCHOOL'S
DECISION TO MAKE.

130
00:05:22,590 --> 00:05:24,492
WELL, DID YOU EVER TALK
TO ANYONE AT THE SCHOOL?

131
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,293
MAKE A FEW CALLS
ON MY BEHALF?

132
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,562
MAYBE YOU COULD
HAVE BEEN "NICER"
TO PRINCIPAL SKINNER

133
00:05:28,596 --> 00:05:29,797
IF YOU KNOW
WHAT I MEAN.

134
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:33,000
LISA... I AM NICE.

135
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,704
HOMER, I REALLY APPRECIATE
YOU MAKING DINNER

136
00:05:36,737 --> 00:05:39,306
BUT THIS FOOD TASTES
A LITTLE STRANGE.

137
00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:40,408
IT HURTS MY TEETH.

138
00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:43,210
THAT'S BECAUSE
I'VE LOADED IT WITH SUGAR!

139
00:05:44,445 --> 00:05:46,680
MARGE, OUR SHIP HAS COME IN.

140
00:05:46,714 --> 00:05:49,850
I FOUND 500 POUNDS OF SUGAR--
IN THE FOREST--

141
00:05:49,883 --> 00:05:52,319
THAT I'M GOING TO SELL DIRECTLY
TO THE CONSUMER

142
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,855
AND ALL FOR A LOW, LOW PRICE
OF ONE DOLLAR PER POUND.

143
00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:57,858
BUT THE GROCERY STORE SELLS
SUGAR FOR 35 CENTS A POUND.

144
00:05:57,891 --> 00:05:59,993
AND IT DOESN'T HAVE NAILS
AND BROKEN GLASS IN IT.

145
00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,429
THOSE ARE PRIZES.

146
00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:05,866
OOH, A BLASTING CAP.

147
00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:09,369
( horn playing )

148
00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:12,239
IT'S YOUR TURN, JIMBO.

149
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,275
OOH!

150
00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:17,411
SOMEONE'S BEEN PRACTICING
OVER THE SUMMER.

151
00:06:17,445 --> 00:06:18,378
WELCOME ABOARD.

152
00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:20,047
YES!

153
00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:21,248
OOH!

154
00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:22,382
OW! MY LUTE!

155
00:06:22,416 --> 00:06:23,417
MM-HMM.

156
00:06:23,451 --> 00:06:27,455
LISA SIMPSON TRYING
FOR FIRST CHAIR SAXOPHONE.

157
00:06:27,488 --> 00:06:30,090
( playing jazz )

158
00:06:34,495 --> 00:06:35,429
VERY NICE.

159
00:06:35,463 --> 00:06:36,396
NOW ALLISON TAYLOR

160
00:06:36,430 --> 00:06:38,398
ALSO TRYING FOR
FIRST CHAIR SAXOPHONE.

161
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:42,503
( playing jazz )

162
00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:50,444
THIS IS A VERY
TOUGH DECISION, GIRLS.

163
00:06:50,478 --> 00:06:51,545
YOU'RE BOTH VERY GOOD.

164
00:06:51,579 --> 00:06:53,514
( improvises solo )

165
00:07:00,353 --> 00:07:01,922
( applause )

166
00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:03,724
WELL, I GUESS THAT
CLINCHES THAT...

167
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:05,759
( improvises solo )

168
00:07:12,466 --> 00:07:14,267
( applause )

169
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:17,004
( playing in harmony )

170
00:07:26,980 --> 00:07:27,881
( group gasps )

171
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:33,120
THAT WAS
A CLOSE ONE, LISA

172
00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:34,321
BUT YOU MADE IT.

173
00:07:34,354 --> 00:07:36,089
I WON FIRST CHAIR?

174
00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:37,424
NO, YOU REGAINED
CONSCIOUSNESS.

175
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:38,692
ALLISON GOT FIRST CHAIR.

176
00:07:38,726 --> 00:07:40,894
AHH!

177
00:07:45,365 --> 00:07:47,635
OH, IT WAS JUST A DREAM.

178
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:49,503
OH, THAT WAS
A CLOSE ONE, LISA

179
00:07:49,537 --> 00:07:50,938
BUT YOU MADE IT.

180
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:52,472
I WON FIRST CHAIR?

181
00:07:52,506 --> 00:07:54,041
NO, YOU REGAINED
CONSCIOUSNESS.

182
00:07:54,074 --> 00:07:55,275
ALLISON GOT FIRST CHAIR.

183
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:57,477
AND BELIEVE ME,
THIS IS NOT A DREAM!

184
00:07:57,511 --> 00:07:58,979
AHH!

185
00:08:05,252 --> 00:08:07,387
I NEED HELP, MOM.
THERE'S ANOTHER GIRL AT SCHOOL

186
00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:10,290
WHO'S SMARTER, YOUNGER,
AND A BETTER SAX PLAYER THAN ME.

187
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,859
I FEEL SO AVERAGE.

188
00:08:11,892 --> 00:08:14,662
WELL, YOU'LL ALWAYS BE
NUMBER ONE TO ME.

189
00:08:14,695 --> 00:08:18,498
HELLO. FIRSTBORN
WITHIN EARSHOT.

190
00:08:18,532 --> 00:08:20,400
I MEANT MY NUMBER ONE GIRL.

191
00:08:22,402 --> 00:08:23,571
OH, FOR CRYING...

192
00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:26,807
HONEY, IF YOU GET
TOO COMPETITIVE,

193
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,241
YOU'LL NEVER BE HAPPY.

194
00:08:28,275 --> 00:08:29,543
NO MATTER HOW GOOD YOU ARE

195
00:08:29,577 --> 00:08:31,311
THERE'S ALWAYS GOING TO BE
SOMEONE BETTER THAN YOU.

196
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,313
I ALWAYS THOUGHT I HAD
THE TALLEST HAIR.

197
00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:36,349
BUT THAT TRIP TO GRACELAND
REALLY OPENED MY EYES.

198
00:08:36,383 --> 00:08:37,417
BUT SHE'S BETTER THAN ME

199
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,553
AT EVERYTHING
THAT MAKES ME SPECIAL.

200
00:08:39,587 --> 00:08:40,487
BELIEVE ME, HONEY

201
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,323
SHE'S MORE SCARED OF YOU
THAN YOU ARE OF HER.

202
00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,058
YOU'RE THINKING OF BEARS, MOM.

203
00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:47,394
( doorbell ringing )

204
00:08:47,427 --> 00:08:48,929
SUGAR MAN.

205
00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:52,566
DOOR-TO-DOOR SUGAR?

206
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:54,602
WELL, MARVELOUS IDEA.

207
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:55,502
( distant shouting )

208
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,436
WHAT'S THAT, MOTHER?

209
00:08:56,469 --> 00:08:57,504
( distant shouting )

210
00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:58,906
I'M JUST TALKING
TO THE SUGAR MAN.

211
00:08:58,939 --> 00:09:00,007
( distant shouting )

212
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,208
MOTHER, I'M A BIG BOY.

213
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:03,577
I CAN DO AS I WISH.
EXCUSE ME.

214
00:09:05,646 --> 00:09:07,114
THANKS A LOT, SIMPSON.
NOW I'M GROUNDED.

215
00:09:09,717 --> 00:09:11,952
HEY, ALLISON, WHAT'S THE ANSWER
TO NUMBER NINE?

216
00:09:11,985 --> 00:09:13,621
I CAN'T TELL
YOU, RALPH.

217
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:15,789
I CAN'T TELL YOU
EITHER, RALPH.

218
00:09:15,823 --> 00:09:17,625
LEAVE ME ALONE.

219
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:19,259
BRAINIAC!

220
00:09:19,292 --> 00:09:20,093
NERD!

221
00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:21,228
YOU GEEKAZOID!

222
00:09:21,261 --> 00:09:22,295
LEAVE ME ALONE!

223
00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:23,163
( grunts )

224
00:09:25,165 --> 00:09:28,301
AH, THAT USED TO BE
MY FACE IN THE MUD.

225
00:09:28,335 --> 00:09:31,238
I CAN'T STAND TO SEE YOU
SO MISERABLE, LIS...

226
00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:33,707
UNLESS IT'S FROM A RUBBER SPIDER
DOWN YOUR DRESS.

227
00:09:33,741 --> 00:09:35,075
OOH, THAT GIVES ME AN IDEA.

228
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:36,209
NOTE FOR LATER:

229
00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:38,612
PUT RUBBER SPIDER
DOWN LISA'S DRESS.

230
00:09:38,646 --> 00:09:39,813
( chuckling )

231
00:09:42,983 --> 00:09:45,252
( chuckling )

232
00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:49,623
HEY, I KNOW.
HOW ABOUT IF I DIG UP

233
00:09:49,657 --> 00:09:51,324
SOME DIRT ON ALLISON?

234
00:09:51,358 --> 00:09:53,794
REMEMBER HOW I GOT
MILHOUSE'S PICTURE
ON AMERICA'S MOST WANTED?

235
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:56,830
THERE HE IS,
ON THE MONKEY BARS.

236
00:09:56,864 --> 00:09:58,766
TRY TO TAKE HIM ALIVE.

237
00:09:58,799 --> 00:09:59,599
( screaming )

238
00:09:59,633 --> 00:10:01,334
OH, NO! NOT AGAIN!

239
00:10:04,271 --> 00:10:06,006
I APPRECIATE THE OFFER,
BUT IT GOES AGAINST

240
00:10:06,039 --> 00:10:07,474
EVERY MORAL FIBER
IN MY BODY.

241
00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:08,475
SUIT YOURSELF.

242
00:10:08,508 --> 00:10:10,510
IF YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND,
HERE IS MY CARD.

243
00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:11,611
I DON'T NEED A CARD.

244
00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:12,980
YOU LIVE IN THE
ROOM NEXT TO ME.

245
00:10:13,013 --> 00:10:16,016
NOTE: NEXT YEAR,
ORDER FEWER CARDS.

246
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:18,085
AND YOU DIDN'T THINK
I'D MAKE ANY MONEY.

247
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:21,121
I FOUND A DOLLAR
WHILE I WAS WAITING FOR THE BUS.

248
00:10:21,154 --> 00:10:23,323
WHILE YOU WERE OUT
"EARNING" THAT DOLLAR

249
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,859
YOU LOST $40 BY
NOT GOING TO WORK.

250
00:10:25,893 --> 00:10:28,161
THE PLANT CALLED
AND SAID IF YOU DON'T
COME IN TOMORROW

251
00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:29,663
DON'T BOTHER
COMING IN MONDAY.

252
00:10:29,697 --> 00:10:31,564
WOO-HOO!
A FOUR-DAY WEEKEND!

253
00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:35,669
( groans )

254
00:10:38,005 --> 00:10:39,873
HEY! I AM ABOVE AVERAGE.

255
00:10:39,907 --> 00:10:41,508
SO WHAT IF ALLISON'S
AHEAD OF ME.

256
00:10:41,541 --> 00:10:44,812
THERE'S NO SHAME
IN BEING SECOND.

257
00:10:44,845 --> 00:10:47,614
Man:
AND NOW, AVIS RENT-A-CAR
IS PROUD TO PRESENT

258
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:50,450
THE SECOND BEST BAND IN AMERICA.

259
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:53,854
WILL YOU WELCOME GARFUNKEL,
MESSINA, OATES AND LISA

260
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:58,125
SINGING THEIR NUMBER TWO HIT
"BORN TO RUNNER-UP."

261
00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:01,161
( incoherent rock music )

262
00:11:01,194 --> 00:11:04,331
( booing )

263
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:06,666
WHY WOULD THEY COME
TO OUR CONCERT JUST TO BOO US?

264
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,702
LIS, I DID SOME CHECKING
ON THIS ALLISON CHARACTER.

265
00:11:08,736 --> 00:11:11,204
AND I KNOW IT'S AGAINST
ALL YOUR MORAL FIBERS...

266
00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:12,405
GIVE IT TO ME.

267
00:11:12,439 --> 00:11:13,707
( chuckles )

268
00:11:13,741 --> 00:11:15,575
HEY, WAIT,
THERE'S NOTHING BAD HERE.

269
00:11:15,608 --> 00:11:17,677
YEP. SHE'S CLEAN AS A BEAN

270
00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:20,881
BUT I DID TIP OFF THE FEDS
AS TO THE WHEREABOUTS

271
00:11:20,914 --> 00:11:23,817
OF OUR GOOD FRIEND MILHOUSE.

272
00:11:23,851 --> 00:11:26,319
I'M TELLING YOU,
I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.

273
00:11:26,353 --> 00:11:27,254
I DON'T CARE.

274
00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:34,762
( yelling )

275
00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:36,930
OUCH! MY GLASSES!

276
00:11:39,299 --> 00:11:42,736
OH, I'VE GOT TO STOP
BEING SO PETTY.

277
00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:45,538
I SHOULD BE ALLISON'S FRIEND,
NOT HER COMPETITOR.

278
00:11:45,572 --> 00:11:47,374
I MEAN...

279
00:11:47,407 --> 00:11:50,443
SHE IS A WONDERFUL PERSON.

280
00:11:50,477 --> 00:11:51,711
WAY TO GO, LIS.

281
00:11:51,745 --> 00:11:53,580
I MEAN, WHY COMPETE
WITH SOMEONE

282
00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,248
WHO'S JUST GOING TO KICK
YOUR BUTT ANYWAY?

283
00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:57,584
I PREFER MY PHRASING.

284
00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:01,755
IT'S GREAT OF YOU
TO COME OVER, LISA.

285
00:12:01,789 --> 00:12:03,623
I REALLY WANT US
TO BE FRIENDS.

286
00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:05,725
YOU'RE A WONDERFUL PERSON.

287
00:12:05,759 --> 00:12:08,295
HI, LISA,
I'M ALLISON'S FATHER,
PROFESSOR TAYLOR.

288
00:12:08,328 --> 00:12:09,930
I'VE HEARD GREAT THINGS
ABOUT YOU.

289
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:11,799
OH, REALLY? I...

290
00:12:11,832 --> 00:12:13,901
DON'T BE MODEST,
I'M GLAD WE HAVE SOMEONE

291
00:12:13,934 --> 00:12:15,735
WHO CAN JOIN US
IN OUR ANAGRAM GAMES.

292
00:12:15,769 --> 00:12:17,704
WE TAKE PROPER NAMES
AND REARRANGE THE LETTERS

293
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:19,773
TO FORM A DESCRIPTION
OF THAT PERSON.

294
00:12:19,807 --> 00:12:22,209
LIKE, OH, I DON'T KNOW.

295
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,244
ALEC GUINESS.

296
00:12:24,277 --> 00:12:25,578
GENUINE CLASS.

297
00:12:25,612 --> 00:12:27,247
HO-HO, VERY GOOD.

298
00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:30,117
ALL RIGHT, LISA. UM...

299
00:12:30,150 --> 00:12:31,751
JEREMY IRONS.

300
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:36,489
JEREMY'S IRON.

301
00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:38,558
MM-HMM.

302
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:42,462
WELL, THAT'S VERY GOOD
FOR A FIRST TRY.

303
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,097
YOU KNOW WHAT?

304
00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:45,899
I HAVE A BALL.

305
00:12:45,933 --> 00:12:47,367
PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE
TO BOUNCE IT.

306
00:12:55,542 --> 00:12:56,743
WHAT'S THIS?

307
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,745
OH, IT'S FOR THE SCHOOL
DIORAMA COMPETITION.

308
00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:00,180
YOU'RE FINISHED ALREADY?

309
00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:02,015
BUT THE COMPETITION
ISN'T FOR WEEKS.

310
00:13:02,049 --> 00:13:04,284
LISA, WE'RE TALKING DIORAMAS.

311
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:05,518
WHO COULD WAIT?

312
00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:07,754
I CHOSE "THE TELL-TALE HEART,"
BY EDGAR ALLAN POE.

313
00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:10,824
SEE, THIS IS THE BEDROOM
WHERE THE OLD MAN WAS MURDERED

314
00:13:10,858 --> 00:13:14,161
AND HE'S BURIED HERE
UNDER THE FLOORBOARDS.

315
00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:16,196
OH, AND LOOK, I USED
AN OLD METRONOME

316
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:20,533
TO SIMULATE THE HEARTBEAT
THAT DROVE THE KILLER INSANE.

317
00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:23,003
( beating )

318
00:13:23,036 --> 00:13:24,304
IT'S NEAT, HUH?

319
00:13:24,337 --> 00:13:26,606
IT'S GREAT.

320
00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,541
IT'S REALLY GREAT.

321
00:13:33,847 --> 00:13:35,983
OH, GOT AWAY FROM YOU, HUH?

322
00:13:36,016 --> 00:13:37,550
WELL, YOU KEEP AT IT.

323
00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:51,531
MUST... PROTECT... SUGAR.

324
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:53,366
THIEVES EVERYWHERE...

325
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,969
THE STRONG
MUST PROTECT THE SWEET.

326
00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:58,338
THE SWEET...

327
00:13:58,371 --> 00:13:59,739
( snoring )

328
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:01,341
HOMER?

329
00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:05,645
( Latin accent ):
IN AMERICA,
FIRST YOU GET THE SUGAR

330
00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:11,318
THEN YOU GET THE POWER,
THEN YOU GET THE WOMEN.

331
00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:12,920
HOMER!

332
00:14:12,953 --> 00:14:13,853
HOMER!

333
00:14:13,887 --> 00:14:14,687
WHA-WHAT?

334
00:14:14,721 --> 00:14:16,189
I WANT YOU TO FORGET
ABOUT GUARDING

335
00:14:16,223 --> 00:14:17,190
THE STUPID SUGAR.

336
00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:19,259
YOU'RE BEING
COMPLETELY PARANOID.

337
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,593
OH, AM I?

338
00:14:20,627 --> 00:14:22,329
AM I REALLY?

339
00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:23,163
AHA!

340
00:14:23,196 --> 00:14:24,031
HELLO.

341
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,099
ALL RIGHT, PAL.

342
00:14:26,133 --> 00:14:27,367
WHERE'D YOU GET
THE SUGAR FOR THAT TEA?

343
00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:29,502
I NICKED IT
WHEN YOU LET YOUR GUARD DOWN

344
00:14:29,536 --> 00:14:31,338
FOR THAT SPLIT SECOND.

345
00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:34,007
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN.

346
00:14:34,041 --> 00:14:35,108
GOOD-BYE.

347
00:14:35,142 --> 00:14:36,876
YOU SEE, MARGE?
YOU SEE?

348
00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:38,045
HOMER, WHEN ARE YOU
GOING TO GIVE UP

349
00:14:38,078 --> 00:14:39,546
THIS CRAZY SUGAR SCHEME?

350
00:14:39,579 --> 00:14:40,747
NEVER!

351
00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:42,015
NEVER, MARGE.

352
00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:44,784
I CAN'T LIVE
THE BUTTON-DOWN LIFE LIKE YOU.

353
00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:46,086
I WANT IT ALL.

354
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,354
THE TERRIFYING LOWS

355
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,788
THE DIZZYING HIGHS

356
00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:50,190
THE CREAMY MIDDLES.

357
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:53,760
SURE, I MIGHT OFFEND
A FEW OF THE BLUENOSES

358
00:14:53,793 --> 00:14:56,063
WITH MY COCKY STRIDE
AND MUSKY ODORS

359
00:14:56,096 --> 00:15:00,467
OH, I'LL NEVER BE THE DARLING
OF THE SO-CALLED CITY FATHERS

360
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:03,203
WHO CLUCK THEIR TONGUES,
STROKE THEIR BEARDS

361
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:06,873
AND TALK ABOUT, "WHAT'S TO BE
DONE WITH THIS HOMER SIMPSON?"

362
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:10,310
LOOK, JUST GET RID
OF THE SUGAR, OKAY?

363
00:15:10,343 --> 00:15:11,544
NO!

364
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:13,280
( buzzing )

365
00:15:16,616 --> 00:15:17,784
( screams )

366
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:19,619
HEY! GET OFF MY SUGAR!

367
00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:21,254
BAD BEES! BAD!

368
00:15:21,288 --> 00:15:22,455
OW!

369
00:15:22,489 --> 00:15:23,923
OW!!

370
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:26,093
THEY'RE DEFENDING
THEMSELVES SOMEHOW.

371
00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:28,761
LOOK, BART.

372
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:30,430
IT ALMOST KILLED ME.

373
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:33,000
BUT I HANDCRAFTED
ALL 75 CHARACTERS

374
00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:34,467
FROM OLIVER TWIST.

375
00:15:34,501 --> 00:15:37,170
AND NOW-- THE COUP DE GRACE

376
00:15:37,204 --> 00:15:39,806
A BITTER SNOWSTORM.

377
00:15:42,142 --> 00:15:44,011
COOL.

378
00:15:44,044 --> 00:15:45,078
UH-OH.

379
00:15:45,112 --> 00:15:46,513
( crashing )

380
00:15:46,546 --> 00:15:48,015
IS IT OKAY?

381
00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:52,519
WELL, THE IMPORTANT THING
IS THAT WE SURVIVED.

382
00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:54,454
AH! WHO AM I KIDDING?

383
00:15:54,487 --> 00:15:57,157
THERE'S NO WAY I'M EVER GOING
TO BEAT ALLISON.

384
00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:59,492
OH, SURE THERE IS.

385
00:15:59,526 --> 00:16:03,163
BUT IT INVOLVES BEING
A BIT UNDERHANDED,

386
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:06,833
A BIT DEVIOUS, A BIT,
AS THE FRENCH SAY

387
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:08,335
BARTESQUE.

388
00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:09,969
I'LL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES.

389
00:16:10,003 --> 00:16:13,506
THEN WELCOME TO THE
NETHER REGIONS OF THE SOUL.

390
00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:17,977
NOW, HERE'S WHAT WE DO.

391
00:16:18,011 --> 00:16:20,113
TOMORROW MORNING, WHEN ALLISON
COMES OUT OF HER HOUSE

392
00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:22,349
WE SPRAY HER WITH THE HOSE

393
00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:26,119
SOAKING HER FROM HEAD TO TOE,
LEAVING US RELATIVELY DRY.

394
00:16:26,153 --> 00:16:27,187
RELATIVELY?

395
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:29,056
WELL, THERE'S BOUND TO BE
SOME SPLASH-BACK.

396
00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:32,125
BART, HER BEING WET WON'T
HELP ME WIN THE COMPETITION.

397
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:35,462
WELL. WE COULD JUST
SABOTAGE HER DIORAMA

398
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:37,230
HUMILIATING HER IN FRONT
OF THE STUDENTS AND FACULTY.

399
00:16:37,264 --> 00:16:38,465
PERFECT!

400
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:40,500
LEAVING HER PRIMED
FOR THE MOST TRAUMATIC

401
00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:42,001
HOSE-SOAKING OF HER LIFE.

402
00:16:42,035 --> 00:16:44,071
ENOUGH WITH THE HOSE!

403
00:16:46,606 --> 00:16:49,342
IT SURE IS QUIET
IN HERE TODAY.

404
00:16:49,376 --> 00:16:53,080
YES! A LITTLE TOO QUIET
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

405
00:16:53,113 --> 00:16:54,547
I'M AFRAID I DON'T.

406
00:16:54,581 --> 00:16:57,984
YOU SEE, BEES USUALLY MAKE
A LOT OF NOISE.

407
00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,186
( loudly ):
NO NOISE...

408
00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:01,054
SUGGESTS NO BEES.

409
00:17:01,088 --> 00:17:03,423
OH, I UNDERSTAND NOW.

410
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:04,657
OH, LOOK.
THERE GOES ONE.

411
00:17:04,691 --> 00:17:05,658
TO THE BEEMOBILE!

412
00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:07,394
YOU MEAN YOUR CHEVY?

413
00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:08,295
YES.

414
00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:11,064
WELL, VERY CLEVER, SIMPSON.

415
00:17:11,098 --> 00:17:12,832
LURING OUR BEES
TO YOUR SUGAR PILE

416
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:15,001
AND THEN SELLING THEM BACK
TO US AT AN INFLATED PRICE.

417
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,103
BEES ARE ON THE WHAT NOW?

418
00:17:16,136 --> 00:17:19,239
SIMPSON, YOU DIABOLICAL...

419
00:17:19,272 --> 00:17:22,842
WE'RE WILLING TO PAY YOU
$2,000 FOR THIS SWARM.

420
00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:24,377
DEAL!

421
00:17:26,613 --> 00:17:28,014
OH, WAIT A MINUTE.

422
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:29,048
THE BEES ARE LEAVING.

423
00:17:30,283 --> 00:17:31,584
NO!

424
00:17:31,618 --> 00:17:34,087
MY SUGAR IS MELTING.

425
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:36,989
MELTING... OH, WHAT A WORLD.

426
00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:42,629
( sobbing ):
MY SUGAR'S GONE.

427
00:17:42,662 --> 00:17:44,364
I'M SORRY, HOMEY.

428
00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:45,565
IT'S OKAY, MARGE.

429
00:17:45,598 --> 00:17:47,066
I'VE LEARNED MY LESSON.

430
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:50,703
A MOUNTAIN OF SUGAR
IS TOO MUCH FOR ONE MAN.

431
00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:52,239
IT'S CLEAR NOW WHY GOD

432
00:17:52,272 --> 00:17:54,941
PORTIONS IT OUT
IN THOSE TINY PACKETS

433
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:58,077
AND WHY HE LIVES ON A PLANTATION
IN HAWAII.

434
00:17:58,111 --> 00:18:02,815
AH, "DIORAMA-RAMA,"
MY FAVORITE SCHOOL EVENT

435
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,551
NEXT TO "HEARING TEST THURSDAY."

436
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:05,918
"THE GRAPES OF WRATH?"

437
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:06,819
I DON'T GET IT.

438
00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:08,288
HERE'S THE GRAPES.

439
00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:11,090
AND HERE'S THE WRATH.

440
00:18:11,124 --> 00:18:12,259
All:
EW!

441
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,293
HA-HA!

442
00:18:13,326 --> 00:18:14,961
YES, VERY GOOD WRATH.

443
00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:17,964
AH, LET'S SEE OUR
FOREIGN EXCHANGE STUDENT, UTER

444
00:18:17,997 --> 00:18:21,268
HAS CHOSEN CHARLIE
AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY.

445
00:18:23,170 --> 00:18:24,971
BUT THIS IS JUST AN EMPTY BOX.

446
00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,475
I BEGGED YOU
TO LOOK AT MINE FIRST.

447
00:18:28,508 --> 00:18:29,609
I BEGGED YOU.

448
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:31,778
LISA.

449
00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:33,146
HERE IS,
AS THE FRENCH SAY

450
00:18:33,180 --> 00:18:35,348
LE FAKE DIORAMA.

451
00:18:35,382 --> 00:18:38,117
I'LL CREATE A DIVERSION,
AND YOU MAKE THE SWITCH.

452
00:18:39,152 --> 00:18:40,187
HEY, EVERYBODY!

453
00:18:40,220 --> 00:18:41,254
WHOA! LOOK AT ME.

454
00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:42,489
I'M OVER HERE.

455
00:18:42,522 --> 00:18:44,757
TURN THIS WAY RIGHT NOW!

456
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:46,259
HEY, IT'S BART.

457
00:18:46,293 --> 00:18:48,161
AND HE'S DOING STUFF.

458
00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:49,696
( talking and shouting )

459
00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:55,001
Skinner:
BART, STOP CREATING

460
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:57,103
A DIVERSION
AND GET OUT OF HERE

461
00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:58,171
( crowing )

462
00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:03,843
OKAY, OUR NEXT ENTRY IS
"THE TELL-TALE HEART"

463
00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:05,512
FROM ALLISON TAYLOR.

464
00:19:05,545 --> 00:19:06,879
I CAN'T WAIT
TO SEE THIS.

465
00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:07,747
BE READY WITH THE RIBBON.

466
00:19:09,249 --> 00:19:10,617
All:
EWW...

467
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:12,219
WHAT IS IT?

468
00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,287
( disguised voice ):
IT'S A COW'S HEART.

469
00:19:14,321 --> 00:19:17,190
THEY'RE TRYING TO MAKE
A MONKEY OUT OF YOU.

470
00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:21,361
ALLISON, IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE
SOME KIND OF JOKE?

471
00:19:22,929 --> 00:19:24,564
I DIDN'T DO THAT.

472
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:26,199
I MADE A DIFFERENT ONE.

473
00:19:26,233 --> 00:19:27,367
OH, IS THAT SO, YOUNG LADY?

474
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,669
WELL, WHERE IS
THIS PHANTOM DIORAMA?

475
00:19:29,702 --> 00:19:32,339
I-I DON'T KNOW.

476
00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:36,108
( heart beating )

477
00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:41,180
AT LEAST HAVE THE GUTS
TO TAKE THE BLAME, GIRL.

478
00:19:41,214 --> 00:19:43,516
YOU'RE COMPOUNDING
YOUR FOLLY BY LYING ABOUT IT.

479
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:44,351
RIGHT ON.

480
00:19:44,384 --> 00:19:45,518
YOUNG LADY, COW HEARTS

481
00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:47,220
BELONG IN A BUTCHER'S WINDOW

482
00:19:47,254 --> 00:19:49,222
NOT THE CLASSROOM.

483
00:19:49,256 --> 00:19:51,558
WELL, MAYBE IN
AN OLDER STUDENT'S
BIOLOGY CLASSROOM

484
00:19:51,591 --> 00:19:52,725
BUT THAT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS.

485
00:19:52,759 --> 00:19:54,827
ELEMENTARY SCHOOL
IS WHERE I WOUND UP

486
00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:58,064
AND IT'S TOO LATE
TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT THAT.

487
00:19:58,097 --> 00:20:00,767
FRANKLY, I'M STARTING TO
REGRET SKIPPING YOU AHEAD.

488
00:20:03,135 --> 00:20:05,705
( heart beating )

489
00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:14,514
AH!

490
00:20:14,547 --> 00:20:17,417
IT'S THE BEATING
OF THAT HIDEOUS HEART!

491
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:21,254
I MEAN, I THINK
I HEAR SOMETHING.

492
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:24,357
WHY,

493
00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:26,259
HERE'S ALLISON'S REAL DIORAMA.

494
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:29,396
IT GOT MISPLACED,
OR SO IT WOULD SEEM.

495
00:20:29,429 --> 00:20:31,197
OH, WELL, THAT CHANGES
EVERYTHING.

496
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,365
LET'S HAVE A LOOK.

497
00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:33,800
GET THE RIBBON READY.

498
00:20:33,833 --> 00:20:34,767
( ticking )

499
00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:40,273
OH... A LITTLE STERILE,
NO REAL INSIGHT.

500
00:20:40,307 --> 00:20:41,408
WHAT DO YOU THINK,
MISS HOOVER?

501
00:20:41,441 --> 00:20:42,275
AH...

502
00:20:44,444 --> 00:20:46,413
THIS HAS BEEN
A VERY DISAPPOINTING DAY.

503
00:20:46,446 --> 00:20:48,214
ALL RIGHT,
ON TO LISA SIMPSON.

504
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:50,116
YOU'RE A SHOO-IN
NOW, LIS.

505
00:20:50,149 --> 00:20:52,319
AFTER THE WAY I'VE BEHAVED,
I DON'T DESERVE TO WIN.

506
00:20:53,486 --> 00:20:54,387
WELL, THIS DOESN'T
DESERVE TO WIN.

507
00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:55,422
WHAT?

508
00:20:55,455 --> 00:20:57,223
OOH, NOW WE'RE
INTO THE DREGS.

509
00:20:57,256 --> 00:20:59,326
HERE'S RALPH WIGGUM'S
ENTRY.

510
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,895
PREPACKAGED STAR WARS
CHARACTERS STILL IN THEIR
DISPLAY BOX?

511
00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:04,831
ARE THOSE THE LIMITED EDITION
ACTION FIGURES?

512
00:21:04,864 --> 00:21:06,333
WHAT'S A DIORAMA?

513
00:21:06,366 --> 00:21:09,669
WHY, IT'S LUKE AND OBI-WAN
AND MY FAVORITE, CHEWIE.

514
00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:11,504
THEY'RE ALL HERE!

515
00:21:11,538 --> 00:21:12,439
WHAT DO YOU THINK?

516
00:21:12,472 --> 00:21:13,440
I THINK IT'S LUNCHTIME.

517
00:21:13,473 --> 00:21:15,442
WE HAVE A WINNER.

518
00:21:15,475 --> 00:21:19,245
( cheering )

519
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:20,980
( bell ringing )

520
00:21:21,013 --> 00:21:24,183
I'M REALLY SORRY
ABOUT WHAT I DID, ALLISON.

521
00:21:24,216 --> 00:21:26,753
IT'S NO SHAME
BEING SECOND TO YOU.

522
00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,254
THANK YOU, LISA.

523
00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:30,823
YOU KNOW, I'M ACTUALLY
KIND OF GLAD I LOST.

524
00:21:30,857 --> 00:21:34,361
NOW I KNOW LOSING ISN'T
THE END OF THE WORLD.

525
00:21:34,394 --> 00:21:36,429
HEY, YOU STILL THINK
WE CAN BE FRIENDS?

526
00:21:36,463 --> 00:21:38,465
ONLY IF WE'RE THE BEST.

527
00:21:38,498 --> 00:21:42,935
( Ralph chanting ):
I BEAT THE SMART KIDS.
I BEAT THE SMART KIDS.

528
00:21:42,969 --> 00:21:45,004
I BENT MY WOOKIE.

529
00:21:45,037 --> 00:21:46,939
HEY, RALPH, WANT TO COME
WITH ME AND ALLISON

530
00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:48,307
TO PLAY ANAGRAMS?

531
00:21:48,341 --> 00:21:50,343
WE TAKE PROPER NAMES
AND REARRANGE THE LETTERS

532
00:21:50,377 --> 00:21:52,311
TO FORM A DESCRIPTION
OF THAT PERSON.

533
00:21:52,345 --> 00:21:54,547
MY CAT'S BREATH
SMELLS LIKE CAT FOOD.

534
00:22:50,236 --> 00:22:51,438
SHH.