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{\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪
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(bell rings)
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(tires screech)
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D'oh!
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-Aah!
-(tires screech)
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{\an8}Oh, my God.
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{\an8}The Mad Magazine
Special Edition!
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{\an8}They only put out 17
of these a year!
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{\an8}Boy, they're really
socking it
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{\an8}to that Spiro Agnew
guy again.
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{\an8}He must work there
or something.
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{\an8}Let's do the fold-in.
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{\an8}Okay.
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{\an8}"What higher power
do TV evangelists worship?"
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{\an8}I'll say God.
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{\an8}I'll say Jesus.
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{\an8}BOTH:
The all mighty dollar?
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{\an8}You fold it, you bought it.
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{\an8}Ooh! Snappy answers
to stupid questions.
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{\an8}I'm great at these.
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{\an8}Ask me if something
smells funny in here, boy.
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{\an8}Does something smell
funny in here?
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{\an8}I don't think so...
stupid!
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{\an8}(laughs)
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{\an8}Homey, you want pork chops?
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{\an8}No, I want roast beef,
you clod!
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{\an8}(laughs)
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{\an8}Look at this special insert--
"Iron-on Madness!"
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{\an8}(laughing)
"Ban the bath."
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{\an8}"Don't trust anyone over ten."
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{\an8}"Sock it to me!"
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{\an8}(worried groan)
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{\an8}Those magazines create
a dangerous amount of laughter.
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{\an8}"The all ighty
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ollar?"
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(laughs)
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I get it.
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Gee, business
stinks tonight.
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Where's Barney, Lenny,
and Carl?
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Ah, they never come
around anymore
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now that they got
their mistresses.
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Ah, might as well
close the dump.
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I am going to drink
you under the table.
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No, I am going to
drink you under the...
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-Aw.
-Aw.
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(yawning)
Well, you're closing.
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It's getting late.
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My kids are probably wondering
where their daddy is.
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There's got to be
some other place we can go.
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Think, Moe, think!
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(voice cracking)
Sorry. It's league night.
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I couldn't give a lane
to my own mother.
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I have no son.
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Man, you go through life,
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you try to be nice to people,
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you struggle
to resist the urge
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to punch 'em in the face
and for what?
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For some pimply little puke
to treat you like dirt
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unless you're on a team!
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Well, I'm better than dirt!
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Well, most kinds of dirt.
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Not that fancy
store-bought dirt.
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That stuff's loaded
with nutrients.
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I can't compete
with that stuff.
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That I cannot bowl wreaks havoc
with my self-esteem as well.
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But who am I
to complain?
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I'm tired of being
a wannabe league bowler.
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I wanna be a league bowler.
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(bell dings)
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Hey...
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We can be a team.
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Excuse me, but my team
is ready to bowl!
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You're short one person.
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Uh... that
long-haired freak's
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bowled with us
for years.
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Oh I don't care
if it takes me all night.
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I'm going to get me
that lobster harmonica.
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Come on, lobstie!
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Oh!
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Oh, okay.
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Then I just need
your $500 registration fee.
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$500?
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No problem.
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Would you take
an out-of-state
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two-party bad check?
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No, I will not pay you
$500 for sex!
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Aw, come on, Marge!
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You're getting something
in return
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and I'm getting a bowling team.
It's win-win!
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It's sick! And I don't have that
kind of money to spend on sex.
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Maybe you could get
someone with money
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to sponsor your team...
like Mr. Burns.
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Burns never gives money
to anybody.
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Just last week,
I asked him for $1,500.
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For what?
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Aw, I gotta get the
third degree from you too?!
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Tonight's homework
assignment is...
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Oh, man.
Is it hot in here!
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I better take off my sweater!
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"Down...
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"with...
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...homework?"
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(class laughs)
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Don't look at it, children.
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The shirt makes
a good point.
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I'm with the shirt.
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Homework rots.
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(chanting)
Down with homework!
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Down with homework!
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(coughing)
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As I was saying,
my yearly evaluation
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couldn't have come
at a better time.
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Well, Seymour, I must say,
for once I am impressed.
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In fact, I am going
to give this school
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a perfect 10.
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I'll just write
the zero first.
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Now a vertical line
to indicate the one...
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STUDENTS:
Down with homework!
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Skinner!
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Why are there children
walking on my head?!
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(gasps)
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So... we meet again
"Mad Magazine."
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How do you know
it's from Mad?
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The year was 1968.
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We were on recon
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in a steaming Mekong delta.
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An overheated private
removed his flak jacket
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revealing a t-shirt
with an iron-on
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sporting the Mad slogan,
"Up with mini-skirts."
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Well, we all had a good laugh
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even though I didn't
quite understand it.
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But our momentary lapse
of concentration
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allowed Charlie
to get the drop on us.
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00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:05,263
I spent the next three years
in a P.O.W. camp
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forced to subsist
on a thin stew
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made of fish, vegetables,
prawns, coconut milk,
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and four kinds of rice.
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I came close to madness
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trying to find it here
in the states
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but they just can't get
the spices right.
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Uh, my punishment?
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Hmm? Oh. I'm going to have
to think about that.
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Meanwhile,
wear this home.
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No!
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I need some more ether.
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I can still feel the movement
of the emery board.
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We're fresh out, sir.
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I'll get some more.
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Leave the rag.
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(sniffs)
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Mmm!
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Uh, excuse me. Mr. Burns?
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Poppin' Fresh!
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You glutinous
little doughboy!
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Oh, there's something I've
wanted to do to you for years!
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(giggles)
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(giggling)
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Ow!
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Mr. Burns...
I, uh, was wondering
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00:06:00,568 --> 00:06:04,781
if you'd like to sponsor
my bowling team for $500.
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Oh, why certainly,
Poppin' Fresh.
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I owe my robust physique
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to your tubes
of triple-bleached goo.
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Whoo-hoo!
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Hey, everybody!
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If you want to ask Burns
for a favor, now's the time!
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He's doped up or dying
or something!
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Uh, excuse me.
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I'd like
to request $17
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for a push-broom
rebristling.
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Why, it's that delightful
TV leprechaun!
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I'm going to get
your Lucky Charms!
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(drill grinding)
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MOLEMAN:
Oh, no. My brains.
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Hey, nice, quote
"uniforms", end quote.
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This just in-- a new addition
to our "Worst-Dressed list":
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Those guys!
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Forget this.
I am far too fragile
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to withstand an evening
of barbs like that.
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Aw, come on.
If we quit now
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00:07:08,886 --> 00:07:10,388
we'll never know how badly
they're going to beat us.
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Yeah, you're right.
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That's the kind of thing
that would haunt you.
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Si!
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(laughing)
Buenas noches, señoritas.
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What did he say?
What did he say?
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Was that about me?
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Okay, Otto. Pressure's on.
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Don't choke, don't choke,
don't choke, don't...
190
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choke!
191
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Oh, man!
I knew I was going to choke.
192
00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,289
Well, that's
a funny-looking strike.
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Come on, guys, let's be the team
that supports each other.
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(cheering) You can do it, Otto!
You can do it, Otto!
195
00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:45,298
"Help each other out"
That'll be our motto.
196
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You can do it, Otto!
You can do it, Otto!
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00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:50,636
Make this spare,
I give you free Gelato.
198
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:53,306
Then back to my place,
where I will get you blotto.
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00:07:53,389 --> 00:07:56,309
Domo aregatto,
Mr. Roboto.
200
00:07:56,392 --> 00:07:59,228
You can do it, Otto!
You can do it...
201
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:02,148
Guys, I Made the spare. We won.
202
00:08:02,231 --> 00:08:03,649
All right!
Way to go!
203
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:04,650
We did it!
204
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:10,823
Those beers are
five dollars apiece.
205
00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:20,791
-Let me set the scene for you, Marge.
-All right.
206
00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:23,878
It's a 7-10 split,
the hardest shot in bowling.
207
00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:25,046
It was all up to me.
208
00:08:25,129 --> 00:08:26,255
Oh!
209
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:29,133
So I got up all my
courage right away.
210
00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:31,135
My lips started to move
211
00:08:31,219 --> 00:08:34,514
and I came up with the chant
that won the match!
212
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:35,848
Who knocked down
the pins?
213
00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:38,100
I don't know...
You know, some guy, uh...
214
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:40,019
Otto, I guess.
215
00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:41,771
Good for him!
216
00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:44,565
Yes, but Marge, you're not--
You're missing the point!
217
00:08:44,649 --> 00:08:47,318
The individual
doesn't matter.
218
00:08:47,401 --> 00:08:48,903
It was a team effort
219
00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:50,363
and I was the one
220
00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:52,073
who came up with
the whole "team" idea!
221
00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:53,658
Me!
222
00:08:53,741 --> 00:08:56,661
I can't believe Otto
picked up a 7-10 split.
223
00:08:56,744 --> 00:08:57,662
He's phenomenal!
224
00:08:57,745 --> 00:08:59,747
-But, but--
-Wow!
225
00:08:59,830 --> 00:09:01,707
Several days ago,
a violent riot erupted
226
00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:04,293
incited by an
inflammatory t-shirt slogan.
227
00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:07,547
No, no, now, don't try to
remember what that slogan was.
228
00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:09,840
To ensure that this frenzied
dance of destruction
229
00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:13,511
is never repeated,
I have decided, starting Monday
230
00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:16,347
all students will be required
to wear uniforms.
231
00:09:16,430 --> 00:09:18,307
ALL:
Uniforms?!!
232
00:09:22,436 --> 00:09:24,355
(Herb Alpert & Tijuana Brass'
"Spanish Flea" playing)
233
00:09:24,438 --> 00:09:26,566
Say hello to our
little genius Martin
234
00:09:26,649 --> 00:09:28,234
who looks even smarter
235
00:09:28,317 --> 00:09:30,361
in this vest
and short pant combination
236
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from Mr. Boy
of Main Street.
237
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,867
Or how about
little Lisa Simpson?
238
00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:39,203
She'll have no reason
to play the blues
239
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,163
in this snappy ensemble
240
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:43,332
topped off with
a saucy French beret
241
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:46,669
that seems to
scream, "silence."
242
00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:55,803
All right, pick your size:
"extra-small" or "extra-large."
243
00:09:55,886 --> 00:09:57,096
We've got both.
244
00:09:57,179 --> 00:09:58,931
No pushing now, I-- What?
245
00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:01,767
Oh, I've just been informed
we've run out of "extra-large."
246
00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:04,145
Go, Moe! Go, Moe!
247
00:10:04,228 --> 00:10:05,730
Don't make Homer
shout out "D'oh!"
248
00:10:07,523 --> 00:10:08,691
(cheering)
249
00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:11,152
Woo-hoo!
250
00:10:16,073 --> 00:10:18,451
-(pins clatter)
-(cheering)
251
00:10:18,534 --> 00:10:20,494
All right, Snake,
make us proud.
252
00:10:25,249 --> 00:10:27,209
One, two, three...
253
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:30,796
(rapidly) four, five, six, seven,
eight, nine, ten. Bye!
254
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:33,090
Uh... we forfeit.
255
00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:34,133
(cheering)
256
00:10:40,139 --> 00:10:43,643
There it is, boys:
the Championship Trophy.
257
00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:45,645
We will never possess it.
258
00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:48,731
The Holy Rollers have won it
five years in a row.
259
00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:51,233
MOE: They think they're
so high and mighty
260
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,736
just 'cause they never got caught
driving without pants.
261
00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,449
(ridiculing laughter)
262
00:10:58,532 --> 00:11:00,409
God-boy couldn't get a strike!
263
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:03,245
(laughing)
264
00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:05,414
It's me-- Ned.
265
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:06,707
(laughing)
266
00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:08,417
(screaming)
267
00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:12,254
Mom! My slingshot doesn't
fit in these pockets!
268
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:14,382
And these shorts leave
nothing to the imagination.
269
00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:16,300
These uniforms suck.
270
00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,552
Bart, where do you pick up
words like that?
271
00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:20,304
Yeah, Moe, that team
sure did suck last night.
272
00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:21,389
They just plain sucked!
273
00:11:21,472 --> 00:11:23,099
I've seen teams suck before
274
00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:25,101
but they were the suckiest
bunch of sucks
275
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:26,102
that ever sucked.
276
00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:27,687
Homer! Watch your mouth!
277
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,605
Got to go. My damn wiener
kids are listening.
278
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:31,315
We are not wieners!
279
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:32,692
Then what are you
dressed like that for?
280
00:11:32,775 --> 00:11:34,110
BOTH:
They made us.
281
00:11:34,193 --> 00:11:36,529
"Oh, they made us."
That's loser talk.
282
00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:38,823
You got to start acting
more like me and my team--
283
00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:41,033
the future league champions
of the world.
284
00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:43,369
Nothing's going to stop us now.
285
00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:44,954
Stop everything.
286
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:46,706
I don't remember
writing a check for bowling.
287
00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:48,999
Sir, that's a check
for your "boweling."
288
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:51,252
Oh, yes.
That's very important.
289
00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:52,712
Yes, sir. Remember that
month you didn't do it?
290
00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:55,297
Yes. That was unpleasant
for all concerned.
291
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,341
Anyway, back to the checks...
292
00:11:57,425 --> 00:11:58,759
Stop everything!
293
00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:01,262
I don't remember
writing a check for bowling!
294
00:12:01,345 --> 00:12:04,640
Hmm... the memo says
"To my pal, Poppin' Fresh."
295
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,685
Oh, yes... that greedy,
grasping glob of chemicals.
296
00:12:07,768 --> 00:12:09,729
Probably one of your ether-induced
hallucinations, sir.
297
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:11,272
I'll check
the employee files
298
00:12:11,355 --> 00:12:12,481
to see who
could pull off
299
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,567
such an impersonation.
300
00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:17,111
Hmm, it was either
Pops Freshenmeyer...
301
00:12:20,239 --> 00:12:21,323
or Homer Simpson.
302
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,370
Simpson, eh?
303
00:12:26,454 --> 00:12:29,415
Let's shut down this
bowling scam right now.
304
00:12:34,336 --> 00:12:36,130
Come on, Homer.
Come on, Homer.
305
00:12:36,213 --> 00:12:38,215
Pretend this is baseball
and hit us a Homer!
306
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,386
-Way to go!
-Yeah! Yeah!
307
00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:45,681
-Way to roll it.
-Yes, sir! Oh, yes.
308
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,725
By the way, rhyming "Homer"
with "Homer"--
309
00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:49,393
(making Italian kissing sound)
310
00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:52,563
Look at them, Smithers,
enjoying their embezzlement.
311
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,356
I have a much uglier word
for it, sir:
312
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,942
"misappropriation."
313
00:12:57,026 --> 00:12:57,902
Simpson!
314
00:12:59,111 --> 00:13:00,029
(gasps, man screams)
315
00:13:00,112 --> 00:13:01,906
Listen here...
316
00:13:01,989 --> 00:13:03,407
I want to join
your team.
317
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:04,533
You want to
join my what?
318
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:05,868
You wanna "what"
his team?
319
00:13:05,951 --> 00:13:06,869
I've had one of
my unpredictable
320
00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:08,245
changes of heart.
321
00:13:08,329 --> 00:13:09,872
Seeing these
fine young athletes
322
00:13:09,955 --> 00:13:12,708
reveling in the humiliation
of a vanquished foe...
323
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:16,295
I haven't felt this energized
since my last...
324
00:13:16,378 --> 00:13:17,797
boweling.
325
00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:19,548
Oh, man, he'll blow
our winning streak.
326
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:23,552
Yeah... call this an unfair
generalization if you must
327
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,013
but old people are
no good at everything.
328
00:13:26,096 --> 00:13:28,349
Look, guys, it's not
that simple-- he's my boss.
329
00:13:28,432 --> 00:13:29,391
I'll tell you what.
330
00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:30,893
I'll give him a shot
331
00:13:30,976 --> 00:13:34,230
and if he stinks
it'll be easier to tell him no.
332
00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:35,606
(grunting and groaning)
333
00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:42,571
(panting)
334
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,781
(muttering)
335
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:50,996
Welcome aboard.
336
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,206
(softly)
It wasn't any easier.
337
00:13:59,213 --> 00:14:01,507
Ah, these uniforms
are a godsend.
338
00:14:01,590 --> 00:14:03,217
Horseplay
is down 40%.
339
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:05,010
Youthful exuberance
has been cut in half,
340
00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:07,596
and high spirits
are at an all-time low.
341
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,974
They've even begun
blinking in unison.
342
00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:13,018
I love that sound.
343
00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,020
Now, children
344
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:17,231
while you're having quiet time
I'm going to make sure my desk
345
00:14:17,314 --> 00:14:19,358
is exactly parallel
to the rear wall.
346
00:14:24,154 --> 00:14:27,908
Oh, there's something
I used to do
347
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:29,952
in this situation.
348
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:33,664
But... can't... remember.
349
00:14:33,747 --> 00:14:35,791
Ha ho?
350
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,334
Whoa, I can't believe
351
00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:39,295
I got booted off the team
for Mr. Businessman.
352
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:40,421
(snorts)
353
00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:41,505
I bet I'll get
a little respect
354
00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:43,257
once I get that
Harvard diploma.
355
00:14:54,602 --> 00:14:55,811
Look at that!
356
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,105
All the way to the end
with only one push.
357
00:14:58,188 --> 00:15:00,691
Ah, that's the third game
in a row he cost us, Homer.
358
00:15:01,817 --> 00:15:02,735
Mama mia!
359
00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:03,736
Hoot mon!
360
00:15:03,819 --> 00:15:05,654
Yee haw!
361
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,114
Arr, me maties.
362
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:08,532
Arr!
363
00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:10,701
Whoo! They begged me
to join their team.
364
00:15:10,784 --> 00:15:11,660
Begged me.
365
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:15,706
Well, we certainly
got walloped tonight
366
00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:16,999
eh, fellas?
367
00:15:17,082 --> 00:15:18,000
(laughs)
368
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:19,126
Ow!
369
00:15:19,209 --> 00:15:20,127
Well... ow!
370
00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:21,837
Uh, Mr. Burns, next week
371
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:23,672
is the big
championship game...
372
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:26,759
Ah, yes, that silly
championship...
373
00:15:26,842 --> 00:15:29,762
The only "ship" worth a damn
is friendship.
374
00:15:29,845 --> 00:15:32,097
Look, here comes
the friend ship
375
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,933
sailing your way.
376
00:15:34,016 --> 00:15:35,142
Ooh, here.
377
00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:36,101
Let me get that,
friend.
378
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:39,271
Oops, lost a nail.
379
00:15:39,355 --> 00:15:40,856
Well, that's leprosy
for you.
380
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:55,204
You're "it."
381
00:15:56,413 --> 00:15:57,581
Now you are the one
who is "it."
382
00:15:57,665 --> 00:15:59,124
Understood.
383
00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:00,542
Well, I've got to hand it
to you, Seymour.
384
00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:02,670
These drab student coverings
385
00:16:02,753 --> 00:16:05,756
have created the perfect
distraction-free environment
386
00:16:05,839 --> 00:16:08,300
thus preparing the children
for permanent positions
387
00:16:08,384 --> 00:16:11,387
in tomorrow's mills
and processing facilities.
388
00:16:11,470 --> 00:16:14,098
Best of all, with less than
a minute to go before I leave
389
00:16:14,181 --> 00:16:16,892
absolutely nothing
has gone wrong.
390
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,102
(thunder rumbling)
391
00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:21,522
Well, it is
starting to rain
392
00:16:21,605 --> 00:16:23,941
but I can hardly be blamed
for that, can I?
393
00:16:24,024 --> 00:16:26,819
(both laughing)
394
00:16:26,902 --> 00:16:28,570
Yes, very good.
395
00:16:37,871 --> 00:16:40,541
Wow, look at all
the colors, man!
396
00:16:40,624 --> 00:16:42,334
Red, green,
yellow, orange.
397
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:43,836
I remember all of these.
398
00:16:43,919 --> 00:16:46,588
I'm freakin' out!
399
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:49,717
Hey, something's
coming back to me.
400
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:51,969
Down with homework.
401
00:16:52,052 --> 00:16:53,637
And down with uniforms.
402
00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:55,097
(cheering)
403
00:17:00,477 --> 00:17:02,062
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
404
00:17:02,146 --> 00:17:03,522
Skinner!
405
00:17:03,605 --> 00:17:06,025
Why aren't these
uniforms colorfast?
406
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,776
I don't understand it.
407
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,737
I got them at the same place
I buy mother's dresses.
408
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:12,823
Good Lord, Mother's in the park.
409
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:14,658
Now this, I gotta see.
410
00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:18,120
Aw, Marge, we were so close
to winning the championship.
411
00:17:18,203 --> 00:17:20,622
Now, thanks to Burns,
it's never going to happen.
412
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:24,126
And I spent so much time
building that trophy case.
413
00:17:27,671 --> 00:17:29,882
Homer, maybe Mr. Burns
will bowl a great game
414
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:32,051
and you will win
your championship.
415
00:17:32,134 --> 00:17:35,179
So you're saying
we're definitely going to win?
416
00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:36,430
Whoo-hoo!
417
00:17:36,513 --> 00:17:38,682
I won't need this
any more!
418
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:42,311
(toilet flushing repeatedly)
419
00:17:44,688 --> 00:17:47,524
Marge, someone
broke the toilet.
420
00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:57,034
Don't worry
about nothing, Homer.
421
00:17:57,117 --> 00:17:59,369
I have a feeling
that Mr. Burns
422
00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:01,830
is going to have
a little accident
423
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:02,831
that might keep him
424
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,833
from bowling
with us tonight.
425
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:05,876
Heh, heh, heh.
426
00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:10,881
Smithers, I'm afraid
427
00:18:10,964 --> 00:18:12,716
I won't be able
to play tonight.
428
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:15,677
My old gimpy knee
has gone akimbo again.
429
00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:16,887
Take that!
430
00:18:16,970 --> 00:18:19,848
Ooh... Smithers.
431
00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:22,017
That precision assault
popped it back into place.
432
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:23,769
Thank you, masked stranger.
433
00:18:23,852 --> 00:18:25,270
D'oh, he's gonna
ruin everything.
434
00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:26,313
All right, that's it, Homer.
435
00:18:26,396 --> 00:18:28,524
Either Burns goes or Moe goes.
436
00:18:28,607 --> 00:18:30,234
Yes, I am afraid that I am
going to have to make
437
00:18:30,317 --> 00:18:31,652
a similar threat
438
00:18:31,735 --> 00:18:33,237
with my name
in place of Moe's name.
439
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:34,822
So, who's ready
to kick
440
00:18:34,905 --> 00:18:36,115
some Christian
keister?
441
00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:39,952
Oh, uh, Mr. Burns,
as team captain
442
00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:42,412
it's my duty
to inform you that...
443
00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:43,831
Oh, I almost forgot.
444
00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:45,457
I brought you all
a little something.
445
00:18:47,209 --> 00:18:49,211
Aw, would you look at that?
446
00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,088
"The Pin Pals."
447
00:18:51,171 --> 00:18:52,589
(gasps)
448
00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:54,216
At last, I finally
have a garment
449
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:55,884
fine enough to be married in.
450
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,719
I've always been wealthy
451
00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:01,140
but this is the first time
I ever felt rich.
452
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:02,891
Aww!
453
00:19:02,975 --> 00:19:04,893
Now Homer, you were about
to say something to me?
454
00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:06,937
You're off
the team.
455
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:07,980
What?
456
00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:09,648
(nervous laughter)
457
00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:10,774
Homer!
458
00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,359
He's just ribbing you, Monty.
459
00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:15,988
-Yes!
-Oh-oh-oh, you guys.
460
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:21,118
(grunt)
461
00:19:23,203 --> 00:19:24,913
Hey-hey-hey!
462
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,465
Hallelujah!
463
00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:37,968
-Hey!
-Hallelujah!
464
00:19:39,094 --> 00:19:39,970
-Oh!
-Oh!
465
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:46,935
Nice one, Homer.
466
00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:47,895
Thanks.
467
00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:53,567
Okay, the Holy Rollers are ahead
by one pin.
468
00:19:53,650 --> 00:19:56,904
And we only have
one bowler left: Mr. Burns.
469
00:20:07,122 --> 00:20:08,707
(grunts)
470
00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:13,837
Next time, a few steps more
toward center, don't you think?
471
00:20:13,921 --> 00:20:15,797
Goodbye,
trophy.
472
00:20:25,515 --> 00:20:28,685
Whoa! Whatever I got
a hold of, it's big.
473
00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:39,821
(grunting)
474
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:45,244
Yes!
475
00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:46,203
Excellent!
476
00:20:48,038 --> 00:20:49,998
Yes!
477
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,583
(plays harmonica note)
478
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:53,919
Whoo-hoo! We won! We won!
479
00:21:00,133 --> 00:21:01,218
You mean I won.
480
00:21:01,301 --> 00:21:03,011
But we were
a team, sir.
481
00:21:03,095 --> 00:21:04,346
Oh, I'm afraid I've had one
482
00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:05,973
of my trademark
changes of heart.
483
00:21:06,056 --> 00:21:08,183
You see teamwork
will only take you so far
484
00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:09,810
then the truly evolved person
485
00:21:09,893 --> 00:21:12,688
makes that extra grab
for personal glory. Now...
486
00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:14,398
I must discard
my teammates
487
00:21:14,481 --> 00:21:15,649
much like the boxer
488
00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:17,067
must shed roll
after roll
489
00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:18,485
of sweaty, useless,
disgusting flab
490
00:21:18,568 --> 00:21:21,113
before he can win
the title. Ta!
491
00:21:21,196 --> 00:21:23,865
I guess some people
never change.
492
00:21:23,949 --> 00:21:27,703
Or they quickly change
and then quickly change back.
493
00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:29,037
You know what?
494
00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:30,914
We don't need him
or his trophy.
495
00:21:30,998 --> 00:21:33,041
We got each other,
huh?
496
00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:35,919
Yeah, that's right, Moe.
497
00:21:36,003 --> 00:21:37,713
♪ Go, Homer, you're our man ♪
498
00:21:37,796 --> 00:21:39,881
♪ If you can't do it,
no one can! ♪
499
00:21:39,965 --> 00:21:40,841
(burglar alarm blaring)
500
00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:51,018
(screams)
501
00:21:52,477 --> 00:21:53,645
Well, I guess
no one can.
502
00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:55,230
Run, before they're
through feeding!
503
00:21:56,857 --> 00:22:00,819
-(snarling)
-(shouting)
504
00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:05,240
♪♪
505
00:22:43,236 --> 00:22:44,404
Shh.
506
00:22:47,282 --> 00:22:50,494
{\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.