1 00:00:03,378 --> 00:00:06,548 {\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:06,631 --> 00:00:07,716 (tires screech) 3 00:00:09,509 --> 00:00:10,760 D'oh! 4 00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:12,971 -Ahh! -(tires screech) 5 00:00:15,223 --> 00:00:16,182 D'oh! 6 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,945 {\an8}(snoring) 7 00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:34,784 {\an8}(sucking) 8 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:38,163 {\an8}(distressed moaning) 9 00:00:38,246 --> 00:00:40,290 {\an8}(muttering): I want lemonade. 10 00:00:45,086 --> 00:00:48,089 Hmm, pressure dropping, humidity rising 11 00:00:48,173 --> 00:00:50,800 over 80%, increasing wind? 12 00:00:52,677 --> 00:00:55,180 {\an8}Here we are, chapter two: 13 00:00:55,263 --> 00:00:57,557 "So Your Pressure Is Dropping?" 14 00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:58,516 (gasps) 15 00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:02,562 Dad, wake up! 16 00:01:02,645 --> 00:01:05,231 {\an8}What is it? Wha..? 17 00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:07,150 I think a hurricane is coming! 18 00:01:07,233 --> 00:01:08,860 Oh, Lisa. 19 00:01:08,943 --> 00:01:11,571 There's no record of a hurricane ever hitting Springfield. 20 00:01:11,654 --> 00:01:14,449 {\an8}Yes, but the records only go back to 1978 21 00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:17,452 {\an8}when the Hall of Records was mysteriously blown away. 22 00:01:17,535 --> 00:01:20,580 {\an8}(whining) 23 00:01:20,663 --> 00:01:21,581 {\an8}What is it, boy? 24 00:01:21,664 --> 00:01:23,458 {\an8}Fire? Earthquake? Hippies? 25 00:01:23,541 --> 00:01:26,002 {\an8}-(yelps) -Hurricane! 26 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:29,255 {\an8}Somehow the animals are always the first to know. 27 00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,508 {\an8}KENT BROCKMAN: And the weather service has warned us to brace ourselves 28 00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:34,177 for the onslaught of Hurricane Barbara. 29 00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:36,429 And if you think naming a destructive storm 30 00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,806 after a woman is sexist, 31 00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:40,308 you obviously have never seen the gals 32 00:01:40,391 --> 00:01:42,477 grabbing for items at a clearance sale. 33 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:45,939 {\an8}Hmm. That's true, but he shouldn't say it. 34 00:01:46,022 --> 00:01:48,149 {\an8}We better pick up some supplies. 35 00:01:50,318 --> 00:01:53,113 {\an8}Stand behind the flaming garbage cans. 36 00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:55,198 {\an8}We'll be letting you into the store 37 00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:56,908 {\an8}70 people at a time. 38 00:01:56,991 --> 00:01:59,744 {\an8}Oh let's just beat him up and take his stuff! 39 00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:01,871 {\an8}No, no, no! Do not listen to that man. 40 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,665 {\an8}Remain calm. 41 00:02:03,748 --> 00:02:05,708 {\an8}You will all have a chance to be gouged. 42 00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:07,961 -(appreciative murmurs) -MARGE: Thank goodness. 43 00:02:09,921 --> 00:02:13,258 -(clamoring) -Whoa. 44 00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:24,477 Oh, there's so little left. 45 00:02:29,732 --> 00:02:32,527 Mom, let's just grab what we can and get out of here. 46 00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:35,155 This storm is making people crazy. 47 00:02:36,739 --> 00:02:40,034 The last pineapple... And plenty ripe too! 48 00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:41,619 But I'm not fruit! 49 00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:42,745 I'm a kid! 50 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:44,455 That's what the pumpkin said. 51 00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:45,707 Hi, Lisa. 52 00:02:45,790 --> 00:02:48,042 We're going to be in a pie! 53 00:02:50,211 --> 00:02:51,171 Sir, for your own safety, 54 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:52,839 we do advise you to evacuate. 55 00:02:52,922 --> 00:02:54,132 I ain't leaving! 56 00:02:54,215 --> 00:02:56,092 I was born in this nursing home, 57 00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:58,720 and I'll die in this nursing home! 58 00:02:58,803 --> 00:03:00,555 Is there any chance of you changing your mind? 59 00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:01,806 Sure. Let's go. 60 00:03:11,816 --> 00:03:13,568 Well, need some help there? 61 00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:14,944 You know, maybe you folks should come over 62 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,321 and hunker in our bunker. 63 00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:18,198 Oh, it'll be fun. 64 00:03:18,281 --> 00:03:20,575 We're going to go through our old canceled checks and receipts 65 00:03:20,658 --> 00:03:22,410 and give ourselves an audit-- 66 00:03:22,493 --> 00:03:23,786 Make sure we don't owe anything extra. 67 00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:25,538 Oh, I'm sure I'd be a third wheel. 68 00:03:25,622 --> 00:03:26,998 (chuckles) 69 00:03:27,081 --> 00:03:29,209 No, siree. We'd be happy as hens to have you-- 70 00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:32,921 I would make it my business to be a third wheel. 71 00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:34,714 Okely-dokely. 72 00:03:34,797 --> 00:03:36,591 Ooh, I better go take down the manger scene. 73 00:03:36,674 --> 00:03:37,884 If baby Jesus got loose 74 00:03:37,967 --> 00:03:39,636 he could really do some damage. 75 00:03:45,808 --> 00:03:47,894 Okay, it's the standard Grampa drill. 76 00:03:47,977 --> 00:03:50,480 Everybody into the cellar! 77 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:57,654 ♪ The Hurricane ♪ 78 00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:08,623 Awesome! 79 00:04:08,706 --> 00:04:10,833 So long, suckers! 80 00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:12,627 ALL: Aww! 81 00:04:12,710 --> 00:04:13,670 (crackling) 82 00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:15,672 ALL: Yay! 83 00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:18,800 (wind howling) 84 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,011 Why don't we do something 85 00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:24,097 to take our minds off the storm? 86 00:04:25,723 --> 00:04:28,643 Ooh, a Rubik's cube! 87 00:04:28,726 --> 00:04:30,311 Let's all work it together. 88 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,230 Okay, start with diagonal colors... 89 00:04:32,313 --> 00:04:34,023 HOMER: Use your main finger on the yellow side 90 00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:35,483 and your other finger on the orange side 91 00:04:35,566 --> 00:04:36,567 and turn it. 92 00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:38,278 My main finger? 93 00:04:38,361 --> 00:04:40,405 -Orange to orange! -You've got to start backwards! 94 00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:43,574 (all yelling) 95 00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:45,451 One at a time! 96 00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:48,162 Spin the middle side top-wise. 97 00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:50,540 -Top-wise! -Now I remember why I put this down here 98 00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:51,916 -in the first place! -(clatters) 99 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,836 (electricity crackling) 100 00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:56,587 (thunder rumbling) 101 00:04:56,671 --> 00:05:00,508 (harmonicas playing) 102 00:05:05,763 --> 00:05:07,515 It's dying down! 103 00:05:07,598 --> 00:05:10,018 -All clear, everyone. -Dad, no! 104 00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:12,437 This may just be the eye of the hurricane. 105 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:17,025 Relax. Can't you see how eerily calm it is? 106 00:05:17,108 --> 00:05:19,986 See? I told you it was over. 107 00:05:20,069 --> 00:05:23,656 Hmm... I don't remember a bowling alley being there-- 108 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:24,657 (screams) 109 00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:37,920 Dear God, this is Marge Simpson. 110 00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:41,299 If you stop this hurricane and save our family, 111 00:05:41,382 --> 00:05:43,426 we will be forever grateful 112 00:05:43,509 --> 00:05:45,845 and recommend you to all our friends. 113 00:05:45,928 --> 00:05:48,514 So if you could find it in your infinite wisdom to-- 114 00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:49,640 Wait. 115 00:05:49,724 --> 00:05:50,892 Listen, everybody. 116 00:05:50,975 --> 00:05:53,478 (birds chirping) 117 00:05:53,561 --> 00:05:54,896 The hurricane's over. 118 00:05:54,979 --> 00:05:56,147 He fell for it! 119 00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:57,440 Way to go, Marge! 120 00:05:59,275 --> 00:06:00,735 Remarkable! 121 00:06:00,818 --> 00:06:03,404 There doesn't seem to be any damage at all. 122 00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:05,365 It just goes to show you 123 00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,783 that everything will work out 124 00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:09,285 if you have faith. 125 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:12,914 -(wood clatters) -(sighing) 126 00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:14,248 It's all gone. 127 00:06:14,332 --> 00:06:16,876 Everything... 128 00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:18,669 Gone-diddily-on. 129 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:25,218 Maude? 130 00:06:25,301 --> 00:06:26,427 Rod? 131 00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:27,428 Todd? 132 00:06:27,512 --> 00:06:29,305 I'm right here, Daddy. 133 00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:31,140 Oh, Neddy, it was terrifying. 134 00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:32,433 I thought I was headed 135 00:06:32,517 --> 00:06:34,560 for the eternal bliss of paradise. 136 00:06:34,644 --> 00:06:35,686 Oh, my gosh! 137 00:06:35,770 --> 00:06:37,271 Look at Rod! 138 00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:39,649 I have a headache. 139 00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:44,278 Well, sir, everyone's alive. 140 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:46,072 Guess that's something to be thankful for. 141 00:06:46,155 --> 00:06:47,448 Now, that kind of attitude's 142 00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:49,117 not going to get your house back. 143 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,411 I'm sure your insurance will cover the house. 144 00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:53,287 Uh, well, no. 145 00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:55,415 Neddy doesn't believe in insurance. 146 00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:57,208 He considers it a form of gambling. 147 00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:58,584 You know, it's kind of funny. 148 00:06:58,668 --> 00:07:00,044 The only thing that survived the storm 149 00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:02,004 were the family tombstones. 150 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,798 They're all we have left. 151 00:07:03,881 --> 00:07:06,008 Well, call us if you need anything. 152 00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:14,016 We got new clothes from the donation bin! 153 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,643 I'm a surfer! 154 00:07:15,726 --> 00:07:17,311 Look, Daddy, Todd is stupid 155 00:07:17,395 --> 00:07:19,063 and I'm with him. 156 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:21,399 And now Mommy's stupid. (laughs) 157 00:07:21,482 --> 00:07:23,443 Looking good, Rod. 158 00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:25,570 Looking good. 159 00:07:25,653 --> 00:07:27,029 (sighs) 160 00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:30,825 Neddy, I know this has been a terrible day 161 00:07:30,908 --> 00:07:33,327 but, by golly, first thing tomorrow, 162 00:07:33,411 --> 00:07:35,455 we're going to open up The Leftorium, 163 00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:38,124 and before you know it, we'll be back on our feet. 164 00:07:38,207 --> 00:07:39,792 Down here at Springfield mall 165 00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:43,337 a storm-addled crowd appears to have turned its rage 166 00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:44,338 on The Leftorium. 167 00:07:44,422 --> 00:07:46,507 (glass smashing) 168 00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:48,551 Surprisingly, people are grabbing things with both hands, 169 00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:51,846 suggesting it's not just southpaws in this rampaging mob. 170 00:07:51,929 --> 00:07:53,764 (moaning) 171 00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:55,683 Try looking in the back. 172 00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:58,060 Meantime, Springfield bowlers will be happy to hear 173 00:07:58,144 --> 00:07:59,854 that the Bowl-a-Rama is back in business at its new location 174 00:07:59,937 --> 00:08:01,522 teetering over the Carter-Dixon tunnel. 175 00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:04,275 (bowling balls striking) 176 00:08:04,358 --> 00:08:05,818 (people cheering) 177 00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:08,070 Reverend Lovejoy? 178 00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:11,324 With all that's happened to us today, uh... 179 00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:13,409 I kind of feel like Job. 180 00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,203 Well... 181 00:08:15,286 --> 00:08:18,498 Aren't you being a tad melodramatic, Ned? 182 00:08:18,581 --> 00:08:21,459 Also, I believe Job was right-handed. 183 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:22,793 But, Reverend, I need to know. 184 00:08:22,877 --> 00:08:25,254 Is God punishing me? 185 00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:28,424 Ooh... Short answer: "Yes" with an "If." 186 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:31,385 Long answer: "No" with a "But." 187 00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:33,804 Uh, if you need additional solace, by the way, 188 00:08:33,888 --> 00:08:35,389 I've got a copy of something or other 189 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:36,766 by Art Linkletter in my office. 190 00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:50,821 Even in my darkest hour, 191 00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:53,533 I can turn to the good book for... 192 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:55,576 Son of a gun-diddily-un! 193 00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:57,703 Those gilded edges smart. 194 00:09:00,289 --> 00:09:01,582 Why me, Lord? 195 00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:03,084 Where have I gone wrong? 196 00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:04,919 I've always been nice to people. 197 00:09:05,002 --> 00:09:06,629 I don't drink or dance or swear. 198 00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:09,048 I've even kept kosher just to be on the safe side. 199 00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:11,467 I've done everything the Bible says-- 200 00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,678 Even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff. 201 00:09:13,761 --> 00:09:15,388 What more could I do? 202 00:09:15,471 --> 00:09:18,558 I--I feel like I'm coming apart here. 203 00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:20,434 I want to yell out, but I--I just can't 204 00:09:20,518 --> 00:09:23,604 dang-diddily-do-dang-do-don- diddily-darn do it. 205 00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:24,981 I--I--I... 206 00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:26,357 (sighs) 207 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:31,612 Ned! Maude! 208 00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:33,364 You've got to go back to your house! 209 00:09:33,447 --> 00:09:35,491 Something incredible has happened! 210 00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:36,617 Oh, what happened now? 211 00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:37,827 Did the rubble burn down? 212 00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:39,579 No! Come on! 213 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,627 CROWD: Yay! 214 00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:48,045 (gasps) 215 00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:49,630 Oh, they rebuilt our house. 216 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:52,133 Oh! It's a miracle. 217 00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:55,469 I started making some calls last night, and before I knew it, 218 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:57,805 practically all of Springfield was offering to help. 219 00:09:57,888 --> 00:10:01,058 -Mm-hmm. My pleasure. -Happy to help. 220 00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:02,935 -Fabulous experience. -Sure! 221 00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:04,437 Hope you like it, neighbor. 222 00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:05,688 We didn't have the best tools 223 00:10:05,771 --> 00:10:07,440 or all the know-how, 224 00:10:07,523 --> 00:10:10,484 but we did have a wheelbarrow full of love. 225 00:10:10,568 --> 00:10:12,486 And a cement mixer full of hope 226 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:13,613 and some cement. 227 00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:15,448 Oh, it's wonderful. 228 00:10:15,531 --> 00:10:19,035 I--I--I... I don't know how I can possibly repay you 229 00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:20,578 but if any of you ever need a favor 230 00:10:20,661 --> 00:10:24,582 just look for the happiest man in Springfield. 231 00:10:24,665 --> 00:10:26,334 No, no, not me, friends. 232 00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:29,045 He's talking about himself, but thanks for looking. 233 00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,345 (cheering) 234 00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:39,513 The living room and dining rooms 235 00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:41,849 with a lovely flow for entertaining... 236 00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:43,059 -Uh-huh. -(shirt rips) 237 00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:45,311 And-- Oh! Looks like a loose nail. 238 00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:47,438 Eh, one out of 25 ain't bad. 239 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:51,108 Your beautiful kitchen, Ned. 240 00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:52,985 Just as you remember it. 241 00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,905 Was that, uh... 242 00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:58,115 Was that toilet always next to the refrigerator? 243 00:10:58,199 --> 00:10:59,659 Uh, Ned, 244 00:10:59,742 --> 00:11:02,078 you ever try lugging a toilet up a flight of stairs? 245 00:11:02,161 --> 00:11:04,080 Lisa and I built your room. 246 00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:06,040 But I don't like this clown. 247 00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:07,500 Uh, I wouldn't take it down 248 00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:08,626 if I were you. 249 00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:09,710 It's a load-bearing poster. 250 00:11:09,794 --> 00:11:11,003 (ceiling cracking) 251 00:11:13,798 --> 00:11:16,592 (electricity buzzing) 252 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:18,886 Now, this is a room with electricity 253 00:11:18,969 --> 00:11:21,180 but it has too much electricity. 254 00:11:21,263 --> 00:11:22,348 So I don't know. 255 00:11:22,431 --> 00:11:23,516 You might want to wear a hat. 256 00:11:23,599 --> 00:11:24,892 Uh-huh. 257 00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:27,687 The floor feels a little gritty here. 258 00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,522 Yeah. We ran out of floorboards there 259 00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:30,856 so we painted the dirt. 260 00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:32,525 Pretty clever! 261 00:11:34,610 --> 00:11:37,446 Oh! Something is definitely wrong with this hallway! 262 00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:39,699 Come on in! 263 00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:42,493 It's your master bedroom! 264 00:11:42,576 --> 00:11:43,619 Ow! My nose! 265 00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:45,746 Well, I've seen about enough. 266 00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,581 So, Flanders, 267 00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:50,543 what do you think of the house that love built? 268 00:11:54,672 --> 00:11:56,257 Aw, shoot! 269 00:11:56,340 --> 00:11:58,509 (sighs) 270 00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:02,555 (huffing) 271 00:12:02,638 --> 00:12:03,556 (lens cracks) 272 00:12:03,639 --> 00:12:05,433 Aww... 273 00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:08,769 Now calm down, Neddily-diddily- diddily-diddily-diddily. 274 00:12:08,853 --> 00:12:11,731 They did their best, shoddily-iddily-iddily-diddily. 275 00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:14,608 Got to be nice-- Hostility-ilitity-bility-dility. 276 00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:16,944 Aw, hell, diddily-ding-dong crap! 277 00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:19,447 Can't your morons do anything right?! 278 00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:22,158 -(crowd gasping) -Hey! 279 00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:24,660 Ned, we meant well, 280 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,370 and everyone here tried their best. 281 00:12:26,454 --> 00:12:27,788 Well, my family and I 282 00:12:27,872 --> 00:12:30,249 can't live in good intentions, Marge! 283 00:12:30,332 --> 00:12:32,168 Oh, your family is out of control 284 00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:33,586 but we can't blame you 285 00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:36,756 because you have good intentions. 286 00:12:36,839 --> 00:12:37,798 Hey, back off, man! 287 00:12:37,882 --> 00:12:40,634 Oh, okay, dude. 288 00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:42,970 I wouldn't want you to have a cow, man. 289 00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:44,346 Here's a catchphrase 290 00:12:44,430 --> 00:12:45,890 you better learn for your adult years. 291 00:12:45,973 --> 00:12:47,516 Hey, buddy, got a quarter? 292 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,769 (all gasping and murmuring) 293 00:12:49,852 --> 00:12:51,270 I am shocked and appalled. 294 00:12:51,353 --> 00:12:53,439 Mr. Flanders, with all due respect 295 00:12:53,522 --> 00:12:55,065 Bart didn't do anything. 296 00:12:55,149 --> 00:12:57,109 (gasps) Do I hear the sound of butting in? 297 00:12:57,193 --> 00:12:59,069 It's got to be little Lisa Simpson, 298 00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:01,697 Springfield's answer to a question no one asked! 299 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,783 -(goofy laughing) -What do we have here? 300 00:13:03,866 --> 00:13:05,785 The long, flabby arm of the law? 301 00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:07,661 The last case you got to the bottom of 302 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,789 was a case of Mallomars! 303 00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:12,374 Mallomars. Oh, that's going in the act. 304 00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,835 Oh, yeah, the clown, 305 00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,045 the only one of you buffoons 306 00:13:16,128 --> 00:13:17,588 who doesn't make me laugh. 307 00:13:17,671 --> 00:13:19,048 And as for you, I don't know you, 308 00:13:19,131 --> 00:13:20,674 but I'm sure you're a jerk! 309 00:13:20,758 --> 00:13:22,051 Hey, I've only been here a few minutes. 310 00:13:22,134 --> 00:13:23,093 What's going on? 311 00:13:23,177 --> 00:13:25,679 You ugly, hate-filled man. 312 00:13:25,763 --> 00:13:30,226 Hey, hey, I may be ugly and hate-filled, but I, um... 313 00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:31,727 What was the third thing you said? 314 00:13:33,103 --> 00:13:35,481 Homer... 315 00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:37,525 you are the worst human being 316 00:13:37,608 --> 00:13:40,611 I have ever met. 317 00:13:40,694 --> 00:13:42,196 Hey, I got off pretty easy. 318 00:13:42,279 --> 00:13:43,989 (crowd murmuring) 319 00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:46,367 Neddy? Uh, wait. 320 00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:47,827 Where you going? 321 00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:49,578 (tires squealing) 322 00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:57,044 ♪ Aloha oe... ♪ 323 00:13:57,127 --> 00:14:03,217 ♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo ♪ 324 00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:08,681 ♪ Mamboo-looboo-boom-boo ♪ 325 00:14:08,764 --> 00:14:14,687 ♪ Nee-dee-dee... dee ♪ 326 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:20,734 {\an8}I just attacked all my friends and neighbors 327 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,319 just for trying to help me. 328 00:14:22,403 --> 00:14:23,988 I'd like to commit myself. 329 00:14:24,071 --> 00:14:25,030 Very well. 330 00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:26,407 Shall I show you to your room, 331 00:14:26,490 --> 00:14:27,616 or would you prefer to be dragged off 332 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,118 kicking and screaming? 333 00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:31,203 Ooh, kicking and screaming, please. 334 00:14:31,287 --> 00:14:33,914 As you wish. 335 00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:40,004 (screaming) 336 00:14:45,217 --> 00:14:46,468 Flanders? 337 00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:47,636 Ned Flanders? 338 00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:52,141 I'd better call Dr. Foster. 339 00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:54,143 (ringing) 340 00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:56,395 Yes, Dr. Foster here. 341 00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:57,730 Ned Flanders? 342 00:14:57,813 --> 00:14:59,440 You're sure? 343 00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:01,567 No, no, no, I'll come right over. 344 00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:05,404 And may God have mercy on us all. 345 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:07,197 Darling, there's an emergency at the hospital. 346 00:15:07,281 --> 00:15:08,365 Where are my shoes? 347 00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:10,367 Oh, I think they're in the den. 348 00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:11,869 In the den? 349 00:15:11,952 --> 00:15:14,538 May God have mercy on us all. 350 00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:19,251 Well, how are you feeling this evening? 351 00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:20,586 Uh... 352 00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:21,962 actually, I'm a little chilly. 353 00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:23,047 Can I have another straitjacket? 354 00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:24,465 Of course. 355 00:15:25,633 --> 00:15:27,051 Thank you. 356 00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:28,552 Dr. Foster! 357 00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:32,932 Hmm... Well, at least your memory is not crazy. 358 00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:34,433 Now, Ned, you may remember 359 00:15:34,516 --> 00:15:37,186 we spent some time together 30 years ago. 360 00:15:37,269 --> 00:15:39,605 Do you recall what you were like back then? 361 00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:42,816 -Oh, sure. I was a good little boy. -Were you? 362 00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:51,784 Whee! I'm Dick Tracy! 363 00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:54,078 Bam! Take that, Prune-Face! 364 00:15:54,161 --> 00:15:55,454 Now I'm Prune-Face. 365 00:15:55,537 --> 00:15:56,580 Take that, Dick Tracy! 366 00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:58,165 Now I'm Prune Tracy. 367 00:15:58,248 --> 00:15:59,208 Take that, Dick... 368 00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:00,584 Ned, stop it at once! 369 00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:03,629 -Stop it! -(film flapping) 370 00:16:03,712 --> 00:16:06,298 I can't believe I was such a terror. 371 00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:08,008 Well, neither could your parents. 372 00:16:08,092 --> 00:16:09,843 That's why they brought you to me. 373 00:16:12,054 --> 00:16:15,140 Well, I'm afraid young Ned is unusually aggressive 374 00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:17,518 but I can't seem to find a cause for it. 375 00:16:17,601 --> 00:16:18,686 Hey, hey! 376 00:16:18,769 --> 00:16:20,604 Get down from that bookshelf, please. 377 00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:22,481 Most of those books haven't been discredited yet. 378 00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:24,441 Would you please tell your son to stop? 379 00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:26,193 We can't do it, man. 380 00:16:26,276 --> 00:16:27,486 That's discipline. 381 00:16:27,569 --> 00:16:29,238 That's like telling Gene Krupa 382 00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,824 not to go boom, boom, bap-bap-bap, boom, boom! 383 00:16:31,907 --> 00:16:33,993 (imitating drumming) 384 00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:35,494 Boom! Boom! Tiss! 385 00:16:35,577 --> 00:16:37,496 Hmm... Lack of discipline. 386 00:16:37,579 --> 00:16:39,123 I'm beginning to see the problem. 387 00:16:39,206 --> 00:16:40,833 We don't believe in rules. 388 00:16:40,916 --> 00:16:42,918 Like, we gave them up 389 00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,879 when we starting living like freaky beatniks. 390 00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:48,966 You don't believe in rules, yet you want to control Ned's anger. 391 00:16:49,049 --> 00:16:51,218 Yeah. You've got to help us, doc. 392 00:16:51,301 --> 00:16:54,304 We've tried nothing, and we're all out of ideas. 393 00:16:54,388 --> 00:16:56,724 Hmm... There is an experimental therapy 394 00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:59,685 that might help Ned contain his anger. 395 00:16:59,768 --> 00:17:01,854 It was known as the "University of Minnesota 396 00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,981 Spankalogical Protocol." 397 00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:14,450 And that's just about eight months... 398 00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:16,035 Hmm... Now. 399 00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:19,580 Well, Ned, how do you feel? 400 00:17:19,663 --> 00:17:21,665 I feel... 401 00:17:21,749 --> 00:17:22,916 Fine. 402 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,668 You don't feel... 403 00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:25,669 Angry? 404 00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:28,380 Abso-tively not-arino. 405 00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:30,299 How do you feel about me? 406 00:17:30,382 --> 00:17:32,551 Pretty darn diddily-doodly... 407 00:17:32,634 --> 00:17:35,345 good. 408 00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:36,889 The only problem with the treatment 409 00:17:36,972 --> 00:17:38,599 was that it worked too well. 410 00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:41,685 You became unable to express any anger at all. 411 00:17:41,769 --> 00:17:44,480 From that point on, any time you felt angry 412 00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,065 you could only respond 413 00:17:46,148 --> 00:17:48,484 with a string of nonsensical jabbering. 414 00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:50,402 Well, I'll be darn-diddily-arned. 415 00:17:50,486 --> 00:17:51,653 Yeah, that's the stuff. 416 00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:53,697 You suppressed your rage for so long 417 00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:58,077 it finally erupted as a massive public explosion. 418 00:17:58,160 --> 00:17:59,745 It sure did-diddily-id. 419 00:17:59,828 --> 00:18:01,997 All right, all right, just watch it there. 420 00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:03,582 I'm here to help, you know. 421 00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:05,709 Now, I'd like to try something. 422 00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:07,169 Is there any person 423 00:18:07,252 --> 00:18:10,422 who makes you particularly angry? 424 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:11,632 (phone rings) 425 00:18:11,715 --> 00:18:12,758 Yello? 426 00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:14,551 Yes? 427 00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:17,346 Mental hospital?! 428 00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:18,764 I don't know any Ned Flanders. 429 00:18:18,847 --> 00:18:20,057 The man who lived next door 430 00:18:20,140 --> 00:18:21,600 until his house blew down. 431 00:18:21,683 --> 00:18:23,102 Oh, him. 432 00:18:26,855 --> 00:18:28,732 Mr. Simpson? Dr. Foster. 433 00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:29,983 Please come with me. 434 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:31,819 You folks are free to roam the grounds. 435 00:18:31,902 --> 00:18:32,945 Just remember: 436 00:18:33,028 --> 00:18:35,114 One of our patients is a cannibal. 437 00:18:35,197 --> 00:18:36,740 Try to guess which one. 438 00:18:36,824 --> 00:18:38,867 I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. 439 00:18:41,495 --> 00:18:43,789 MAN: Everyone outside of this room is against me! 440 00:18:43,872 --> 00:18:44,790 I can hear you walking by-- 441 00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:47,626 It stinks! It stinks! 442 00:18:47,709 --> 00:18:48,961 It stinks! 443 00:18:49,044 --> 00:18:51,839 Yes, Mr. Sherman, everything stinks. 444 00:18:54,258 --> 00:18:55,676 We want to teach Ned 445 00:18:55,759 --> 00:18:57,970 to release his anger in healthy doses. 446 00:18:58,053 --> 00:19:00,472 We need someone so irritating 447 00:19:00,556 --> 00:19:04,476 that Ned simply will not be able to repress his rage. 448 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,521 Homer, can you be that annoying? 449 00:19:07,604 --> 00:19:09,898 (grunts) What? 450 00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:11,150 Get in the booth. 451 00:19:18,699 --> 00:19:21,827 "Ned Flanders, I mock your value system. 452 00:19:21,910 --> 00:19:25,497 You also appear foolish in the eyes of others." 453 00:19:25,581 --> 00:19:27,291 (chuckles) Well, howdy, Homer. 454 00:19:27,374 --> 00:19:29,376 Ooh, thanks for dropping by. 455 00:19:29,459 --> 00:19:31,295 Mm, he's not responding. 456 00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:33,547 Proceed to level two antagonism. 457 00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:38,552 "Past instances in which I professed to like you 458 00:19:38,635 --> 00:19:40,053 were fraudulent." 459 00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:42,681 Oh, well, I'll just have to try harder. 460 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:44,433 (chuckles) Ooh! Thanks for dropping by. 461 00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:46,476 Ah, he's still repressing. 462 00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:48,187 Maximum hostility factor. 463 00:19:49,771 --> 00:19:51,607 "I engaged in intercourse 464 00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:53,859 with your spouse or significant other." 465 00:19:53,942 --> 00:19:56,111 Now, that's psychiatry. 466 00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,529 Huh? Huh? 467 00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:58,864 (forced laugh) 468 00:19:58,947 --> 00:20:01,158 Very funny, wise guy. 469 00:20:01,241 --> 00:20:02,659 Aw, that's it. 470 00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:03,702 You just can't insult this guy. 471 00:20:03,785 --> 00:20:05,329 You call him a moron 472 00:20:05,412 --> 00:20:06,455 and he just sits there grinning moron-ally. 473 00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:07,873 Hi, neighbor. 474 00:20:07,956 --> 00:20:09,499 You know what your problem is, Flanders? 475 00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:11,210 You're afraid to be human. 476 00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:13,670 (chuckles) No. Now, why would I be afraid of that? 477 00:20:13,754 --> 00:20:15,714 Because humans are obnoxious sometimes. 478 00:20:15,797 --> 00:20:17,299 Humans hate things. 479 00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:19,218 Well, maybe a few of them do... 480 00:20:19,301 --> 00:20:20,719 Back east. 481 00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:22,679 I can't find what Homer's saying. 482 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:23,680 Did you write that? 483 00:20:23,764 --> 00:20:25,724 Um... Did you like it? 484 00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:27,267 Come on, Flanders. 485 00:20:27,351 --> 00:20:28,477 There's got to be something you hate. 486 00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:29,895 What about mosquito bites? 487 00:20:29,978 --> 00:20:32,648 Mmm-mmm. Sure are fun to scratch. 488 00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:34,191 Mmm, satisfying. 489 00:20:34,274 --> 00:20:36,735 What about, uh... 490 00:20:36,818 --> 00:20:38,403 fluorescent lights? 491 00:20:38,487 --> 00:20:40,572 Oh, they hum like angels. 492 00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:43,283 You're never lonely if you've got a fluorescent light. 493 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:45,285 See? You like everything. 494 00:20:45,369 --> 00:20:47,204 No, that's not true. 495 00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:50,082 I--I--I... I don't like the service at the post office. 496 00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:54,461 You know, it's all rush, rush, get you in, get you out. 497 00:20:54,544 --> 00:20:56,088 Then they've got those machines in the lobby-- 498 00:20:56,171 --> 00:20:57,756 They're even faster. No help there. 499 00:20:57,839 --> 00:20:59,174 You might even say... 500 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:01,927 I hate the post office. 501 00:21:02,010 --> 00:21:03,971 That and my parents. 502 00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:05,222 Lousy beatniks. 503 00:21:06,848 --> 00:21:08,976 Hey, that felt good. 504 00:21:09,059 --> 00:21:10,978 He just said he hates his parents. 505 00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:12,688 Do you know what that means? 506 00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:14,481 Uh, what do you think? 507 00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:15,857 It means he's cured. 508 00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:17,192 That's what I said. 509 00:21:19,111 --> 00:21:21,196 (cheering) 510 00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:24,908 Thanks, everyone. 511 00:21:24,992 --> 00:21:26,576 I'm all better now. 512 00:21:26,660 --> 00:21:29,663 No more storing up the anger till I explode. 513 00:21:29,746 --> 00:21:31,748 If any of you does something I don't like, 514 00:21:31,832 --> 00:21:33,583 you are going to hear about it. 515 00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:36,837 (cheering and applauding and whistling) 516 00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:39,715 Yes, that's very healthy, Ned. 517 00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:41,425 And if you really tick me off, 518 00:21:41,508 --> 00:21:43,343 I'm going to run you down with my car. 519 00:21:43,427 --> 00:21:45,971 -Ha! -Yeah... Um... 520 00:21:46,054 --> 00:21:48,015 (scattered applause) 521 00:21:48,098 --> 00:21:49,725 (chuckles) 522 00:21:49,808 --> 00:21:52,144 Ned, you so crazy. 523 00:21:58,900 --> 00:22:01,278 {\an8}♪♪ 524 00:22:39,441 --> 00:22:40,525 Shh! 525 00:22:43,737 --> 00:22:46,990 {\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.