1 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:06,673 {\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:06,756 --> 00:00:08,925 (chalk screeches) 3 00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:11,219 (bell ringing) 4 00:00:11,302 --> 00:00:12,220 (tires screech) 5 00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:15,890 D'oh! 6 00:00:15,974 --> 00:00:18,101 -Aah! -(tires screech) 7 00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:22,147 Ugh! 8 00:00:32,991 --> 00:00:36,911 {\an8}(chattering) 9 00:00:36,995 --> 00:00:39,247 {\an8}They say the pancakes here stink. 10 00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:40,457 {\an8}Thank you, Agnes. 11 00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:41,916 {\an8}Let's begin. 12 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,293 {\an8}I'm happy to report 13 00:00:43,376 --> 00:00:45,045 {\an8}that our shares in Dynaflux Unimatics 14 00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:47,672 {\an8}are up a delicious seven and three-quarters. 15 00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:50,133 {\an8}This means our investment club portfolio 16 00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:52,635 {\an8}has nearly doubled in value. 17 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,555 {\an8}(murmuring) 18 00:00:55,638 --> 00:00:57,265 {\an8}I suggest we pump our profits 19 00:00:57,348 --> 00:00:59,517 {\an8}into some new high-risk ventures. 20 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,478 {\an8}Oh! Oh! How about Oklasoft? 21 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:03,605 {\an8}It's Oklahoma's fastest-growing software company. 22 00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:05,023 {\an8}Um, cushions? 23 00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:06,775 {\an8}Everybody likes to sit on cushions. 24 00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:09,069 {\an8}Children are so fat today. 25 00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:11,154 {\an8}Isn't there some way we could make money off that? 26 00:01:11,237 --> 00:01:13,031 {\an8}There's a franchise fair this weekend. 27 00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:15,366 {\an8}Why don't we buy a business? 28 00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:16,618 {\an8}(murmuring) 29 00:01:16,701 --> 00:01:18,203 {\an8}I never thought of that. 30 00:01:18,286 --> 00:01:20,580 {\an8}I'm not wild about these high-risk ventures. 31 00:01:20,663 --> 00:01:22,165 They sound a little risky. 32 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,043 Oh, Marge. 33 00:01:25,126 --> 00:01:26,086 You are such a wet blanket. 34 00:01:26,169 --> 00:01:27,587 If we'd listened to you, 35 00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:30,006 we wouldn't have sponsored that Mexican wrestler. 36 00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:33,009 Yet she still gets to share in all the profits. 37 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,427 {\an8}-Mm-hmm. -Is that fair? 38 00:01:34,511 --> 00:01:35,762 {\an8}I guess I'm just not comfortable 39 00:01:35,845 --> 00:01:38,848 {\an8}with the whole idea of "investing." 40 00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:40,391 {\an8}Face it. 41 00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:42,519 {\an8}You can't keep up with the go-go '90s. 42 00:01:42,602 --> 00:01:44,354 {\an8}Well, Marge... 43 00:01:44,437 --> 00:01:46,397 {\an8}You're about as popular as rug burn. (chuckles) 44 00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:48,441 {\an8}All in favor of expelling Marge 45 00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:50,026 {\an8}from the Investorettes... 46 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:51,694 {\an8}ALL: Aye! 47 00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:54,072 {\an8}All right, Helen. 48 00:01:54,155 --> 00:01:56,241 {\an8}If I'm not wanted, I'll leave. 49 00:01:56,324 --> 00:01:57,992 You'll get your pancakes in the mail. 50 00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:00,495 MARGE: And then they gave me back 51 00:02:00,578 --> 00:02:02,330 my $500 investment 52 00:02:02,413 --> 00:02:03,998 and kicked me out of the club. 53 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:05,208 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 54 00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:06,960 Back up a bit now. 55 00:02:07,043 --> 00:02:09,170 When are the pancakes coming in the mail? 56 00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:11,506 Well, maybe it's all for the best. 57 00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:13,133 What do you need to make money for anyway? 58 00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:15,260 As long as I have my earning power, 59 00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:17,303 this family's got nothing to worry about. 60 00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:19,055 Oww! 61 00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:22,058 Oh, call work and tell them I won't be in tomorrow. 62 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,893 Mom, this is no time to be conservative. 63 00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:25,520 Let's roll the dice here. 64 00:02:25,603 --> 00:02:26,938 It would be nice to beat those women 65 00:02:27,021 --> 00:02:28,648 at their own game. 66 00:02:28,731 --> 00:02:32,068 Maybe I should look into a franchise. 67 00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:41,578 Greetings, humans. I am Investo the Robot from the planet Opportuniac. 68 00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:46,124 My superior brain advises you to enter the franchise fair. 69 00:02:46,207 --> 00:02:48,376 Well, we're trying to, but you're blocking our way. 70 00:02:48,459 --> 00:02:50,253 Danger! Danger! 71 00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:52,297 Don't forget to pick up pamphlets. 72 00:02:52,380 --> 00:02:53,923 I'll handle this. 73 00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:58,511 (sizzling) 74 00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,180 (clunking, beeping) 75 00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:02,182 (whistling) 76 00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:03,892 Help, help, help. 77 00:03:03,975 --> 00:03:05,977 Security code 30. 78 00:03:06,060 --> 00:03:08,188 MAN: Well, that's the miracle of the franchise. 79 00:03:08,271 --> 00:03:10,690 You get all the equipment and know-how you need, 80 00:03:10,773 --> 00:03:12,901 plus a familiar brand name people trust. 81 00:03:12,984 --> 00:03:14,694 You'll be on a rocket ride to the moon. 82 00:03:14,777 --> 00:03:16,654 And while you're there, 83 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:19,324 would you pick up some of that nice green moon money 84 00:03:19,407 --> 00:03:21,409 for me-- Royce McCutcheon? 85 00:03:21,492 --> 00:03:22,577 No deal, McCutcheon. 86 00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:23,870 That moon money is mine. 87 00:03:23,953 --> 00:03:25,705 Now, folks, I don't want to alarm you, 88 00:03:25,788 --> 00:03:29,042 but scientists say 40% of America's pictures 89 00:03:29,125 --> 00:03:30,752 are hanging crooked. 90 00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:32,837 ALL: No! No! 91 00:03:32,921 --> 00:03:34,881 Yeah, it's true, and I hear you asking, 92 00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:37,342 "Well, who's going to straighten out all these artistic abominations?" 93 00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:39,177 Your friends? A neighbor? 94 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:40,762 Those fat cats in Washington? 95 00:03:40,845 --> 00:03:42,430 (chuckling) 96 00:03:42,513 --> 00:03:45,058 Good luck. Hey, you know, maybe no one will notice. 97 00:03:45,141 --> 00:03:48,519 Maybe the problem will just fix itself. 98 00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:50,355 Now, you're the one who's being naive. 99 00:03:50,438 --> 00:03:51,940 Okay, fair enough. 100 00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:53,399 But you sound like 101 00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:54,817 you're ready to become your own boss 102 00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:57,320 in the exciting world of frame-nudging. 103 00:03:57,403 --> 00:03:59,739 Yes, for a minimal franchise fee 104 00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:02,200 you'll receive a pair of straightening gloves, 105 00:04:02,283 --> 00:04:04,285 a canister of wall lubricant, 106 00:04:04,369 --> 00:04:06,037 and a booklet of the most commonly asked questions 107 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:07,747 you will hear, 108 00:04:07,830 --> 00:04:10,667 including "Who are you?" And "What are you doing here?" 109 00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:13,419 Hmm, I don't want to own my own business. 110 00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:16,130 I don't know why I came here in the first place. 111 00:04:17,715 --> 00:04:18,675 Hello, Helen. 112 00:04:18,758 --> 00:04:19,676 Marge. 113 00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:20,677 Edna. 114 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,262 Marge. 115 00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:24,847 Uh... 116 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,433 Oh, my name is Agnes, and you know it's Agnes. 117 00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:29,269 It means lamb-- Lamb of God. 118 00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:31,229 I'm sorry, Agnes. 119 00:04:31,312 --> 00:04:32,230 Marge. 120 00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:38,111 ♪ Do the hustle ♪ 121 00:04:38,194 --> 00:04:39,112 ♪ Do the hustle ♪ 122 00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:40,446 Did you know 123 00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:44,284 that disco record sales were up 400% 124 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:47,662 for the year ending 1976? 125 00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:50,290 If these trends continue... 126 00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:53,293 Aay! 127 00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:55,169 Uh, your fish are dead. 128 00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:56,337 Yeah, I know. 129 00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:58,589 I can't get them out of there. 130 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:05,471 Hmm, pita. 131 00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:06,681 Well, I don't know about food 132 00:05:06,764 --> 00:05:08,224 from the Middle East. 133 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:11,102 Isn't that whole area a little iffy? 134 00:05:11,185 --> 00:05:13,980 (laughs) Hey, I'm no geographer. 135 00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:17,400 You and I, why don't we call it pocket bread, huh? 136 00:05:17,483 --> 00:05:18,651 What's tahini? 137 00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:19,736 Flavor sauce. 138 00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:21,112 And falafel? 139 00:05:21,195 --> 00:05:22,405 Crunch patties. 140 00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:23,948 So, we'd be selling foreign... 141 00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:25,408 Specialty foods. 142 00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:27,702 Here, try a Ben Franklin. 143 00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,457 Mmm, that is good. 144 00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:33,875 What's in it? 145 00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:35,293 Tabbouleh and rezmi-kabob. 146 00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:38,129 Uh, that's our chef, Christopher. 147 00:05:38,212 --> 00:05:40,214 (ranting in foreign language) 148 00:05:43,801 --> 00:05:45,094 I could see eating this. 149 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,805 I really could, and I am not kidding. 150 00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:50,808 (murmuring excitedly) 151 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,226 Look at them! 152 00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:53,644 They've jumped on the one franchise 153 00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:55,355 I might possibly have considered 154 00:05:55,438 --> 00:05:58,358 thinking about becoming interested in. 155 00:05:58,441 --> 00:06:00,026 Hmm. 156 00:06:00,109 --> 00:06:01,527 I'm not cut out for the world of business. 157 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:03,821 Ooh, you sound like me. 158 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:05,448 Well, the old me, 159 00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:07,492 which was, ironically, the young me. 160 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:11,245 I was once like you were, young lady-- 161 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:12,789 like all these people-- 162 00:06:12,872 --> 00:06:14,916 lost in a sea of flashy gimmicks 163 00:06:14,999 --> 00:06:16,584 and empty promises. 164 00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:19,545 Then God tossed me a life preserver, 165 00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:22,590 a tasty golden brown life preserver. 166 00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:25,301 Here. Try a pretzel. 167 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:30,306 Mmm! 168 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,974 That's not bad. 169 00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,352 It's not only not bad; it's knot bread. 170 00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:35,353 "Knot bread"-- You get it? 171 00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:36,729 Huh? Ha-ha? You see? 172 00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:37,730 I do! 173 00:06:37,814 --> 00:06:40,024 (both laughing) 174 00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:41,109 "Knot bread." 175 00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:42,527 (bugle plays fanfare) 176 00:06:42,610 --> 00:06:44,237 Let's hear it for the newest members 177 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,406 of the Fleet-A-Pita franchise! 178 00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:48,449 ♪ I'm feeling good from my head to my shoes... ♪ 179 00:06:48,533 --> 00:06:50,368 Maude... Helen... 180 00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:52,787 Agnes... Luanne... 181 00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:54,122 Edna... Bart... 182 00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:56,165 Whoo! We're number one! 183 00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:57,250 We're number one. 184 00:06:57,333 --> 00:06:58,501 Hey, what's going on? 185 00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,753 Wait, wait. Hey. 186 00:07:00,837 --> 00:07:02,547 Your franchise... How much? 187 00:07:02,630 --> 00:07:06,175 -$500. -I'll take it! 188 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:07,427 Congratulations, 189 00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:09,387 and welcome to the dynamic world 190 00:07:09,470 --> 00:07:11,472 of mobile pretzel retailing. 191 00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:13,599 When can I start? What's my territory? 192 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:15,017 Eh, territory... 193 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:16,936 Well, let me tell you: 194 00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:18,604 Wherever a young mother is ignorant 195 00:07:18,688 --> 00:07:21,899 of what to feed her baby, you'll be there. 196 00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:24,694 Wherever nacho penetration is less than total, 197 00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:26,487 you'll be there. 198 00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:30,491 Wherever a Bavarian is not quite full, you will be there. 199 00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:31,534 Don't forget fat people. 200 00:07:31,617 --> 00:07:33,119 They can't stop eating. 201 00:07:33,202 --> 00:07:34,537 Hey! Pretzels! 202 00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:49,385 Oh. Hello. 203 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,637 I'm Frank Ormand. And if you're watching me, 204 00:07:51,721 --> 00:07:54,056 that means you've got pretzel fever, 205 00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:56,684 and not the kind that attacked my intestinal lining 206 00:07:56,767 --> 00:07:57,685 some years back. 207 00:07:57,768 --> 00:07:59,770 (laughing) 208 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:03,399 So let's get your franchise up and running. 209 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:07,862 Start by setting up an office in your basement or garage. 210 00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:12,658 An automatic garage door opener makes you feel 211 00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:16,537 like you're working in a futuristic wonderworld. 212 00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:19,373 Next: Blanket your community with flyers. 213 00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:21,209 A phony ticker-tape parade 214 00:08:21,292 --> 00:08:23,044 will help you avoid littering laws. 215 00:08:23,127 --> 00:08:26,005 (cheering) 216 00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:30,510 Welcome back, space girl. 217 00:08:30,593 --> 00:08:32,386 (sobbing) 218 00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:35,389 Now you're ready to make pretzels. 219 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:37,850 Open your bag of ingredients... 220 00:08:39,060 --> 00:08:40,561 Ugh. 221 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:43,606 Check for millipedes. 222 00:08:43,689 --> 00:08:45,066 Eww. 223 00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:51,405 Hmm... 224 00:08:51,489 --> 00:08:53,074 Hmm, hmm, hmm. 225 00:08:55,493 --> 00:08:56,369 (exclaims) 226 00:09:00,831 --> 00:09:03,125 (honking) 227 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:06,254 Hey, what's all that commotion outside? 228 00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:08,130 Why, it's one of those pretzel wagons 229 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:10,466 the movie stars are always talking about. 230 00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,927 (gasping) Here? At our plant? 231 00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:14,512 That's right, Lenny. 232 00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:16,847 Let's all give in to deliciousness 233 00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:18,766 the pretzel wagon way. 234 00:09:18,849 --> 00:09:20,017 ALL: Yay! 235 00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:21,394 -Yeah. -That's pretzeltastic. 236 00:09:21,477 --> 00:09:22,395 Let's go. Yeah. Homer's right. 237 00:09:22,478 --> 00:09:23,354 Oh, yeah. 238 00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:28,442 Wow, Mom, look at all those customers. 239 00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:29,944 Hairnets, everyone. 240 00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,575 Welcome to Pretzel Wagon. 241 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:37,076 May I take your order? 242 00:09:37,159 --> 00:09:39,537 {\an8}Uh, let's see. 243 00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:43,708 {\an8}I'll have... One-- 244 00:09:43,791 --> 00:09:44,834 Hey, hurry up. 245 00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:46,544 I want to get my pretzel. 246 00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:47,545 One pretzel. 247 00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:48,838 Thank you. 248 00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:51,340 Uh, let's see, um... 249 00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:54,510 I will have one of your, uh... 250 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,137 Come on, come on, while we're young. 251 00:09:56,220 --> 00:09:58,055 (honking) 252 00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:01,350 ♪ Don't stop thinking about tomorrow... ♪ 253 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:03,519 Wow, check out that van. 254 00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:05,438 It looks like it doesn't even need our business. 255 00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:07,064 Hey, let's go. 256 00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:08,691 ♪ It'll be better than before ♪ 257 00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:10,651 ♪ Yesterday's gone ♪ 258 00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:15,615 Excuse me. 259 00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:17,116 I had this spot first. 260 00:10:17,199 --> 00:10:19,744 Sorry, dear. Just business. Ha! 261 00:10:19,827 --> 00:10:21,662 Well, I guess Macy's and Gimbels learned 262 00:10:21,746 --> 00:10:22,997 to live side by side. 263 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,916 Gimbels is gone, Marge, long gone. 264 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,168 You're Gimbels. 265 00:10:27,251 --> 00:10:28,836 Very well. 266 00:10:28,919 --> 00:10:31,088 There must be dozens of great locations in this town. 267 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:32,757 Don't you worry about me. 268 00:10:36,010 --> 00:10:37,720 Hey, slow down. 269 00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:39,889 I wants to talk to you. 270 00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,974 Give us 300 pretzels. 271 00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:45,770 You see? A little persistence and patience paid off. 272 00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:47,730 That'll be $300. 273 00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:49,273 Hey, I don't think so. 274 00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:51,484 I got me 300 coupons. 275 00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,027 (Marge grumbles) 276 00:10:53,110 --> 00:10:56,030 I should have said, "Limit: One per customer." 277 00:10:56,113 --> 00:10:58,658 Should've, but didn't, so hand them over. 278 00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:01,994 Hey, kids, we're eating dinner tonight. 279 00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:03,329 Come on, Tiffany, 280 00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:05,748 Heather, Cody, Dylan, 281 00:11:05,831 --> 00:11:08,334 Dermot, Jordan, Taylor, 282 00:11:08,417 --> 00:11:10,878 Brittany, Wesley, Rumer, 283 00:11:10,961 --> 00:11:13,673 Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, 284 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:16,634 Chloe, Max, Hunter, Kendall 285 00:11:16,717 --> 00:11:20,012 Caitlin, Noah, Sascha, Morgan, 286 00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:22,223 Kyra, Ian, Lauren 287 00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:24,684 Q-bert, Phil. 288 00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,310 (groans) 289 00:11:30,564 --> 00:11:33,025 "Hang in there, baby." 290 00:11:33,109 --> 00:11:35,403 You said it, kitty. 291 00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:38,322 "Copyright 1968"? 292 00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:42,118 Hmm, determined or not, that cat must be long dead. 293 00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:44,578 That's kind of a downer. 294 00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:46,122 They're good pretzels, Mom, 295 00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:48,040 but you got to think big. 296 00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:51,669 Find a major public event and set up shop there. 297 00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:56,507 Here you go. 298 00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:58,676 Free Pretzel Wagon pretzels for everyone. 299 00:11:58,759 --> 00:12:01,262 One bite and you'll be hooked. 300 00:12:01,345 --> 00:12:02,972 -Thank you. -Gracias. 301 00:12:03,055 --> 00:12:05,266 That means "Thank you," Marge. 302 00:12:05,349 --> 00:12:09,186 MAN (on P.A.): Ladies and gentlemen, a winner has been chosen 303 00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,147 for today's giveaway. 304 00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:15,276 And the 1997 Pontiac Astrowagon 305 00:12:15,359 --> 00:12:16,736 goes to the fan sitting 306 00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:21,490 in seat number 0001: 307 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,493 -C. Montgomery Burns. -(gasps) 308 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:27,121 -(scattered booing) -Yay! Yay! 309 00:12:27,204 --> 00:12:30,082 MAN 2: And the fans do not like this one bit. 310 00:12:32,710 --> 00:12:36,505 MAN: And here come the pretzels. 311 00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:40,718 No. No, don't do that. 312 00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:43,137 You're supposed to be tasting them. 313 00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:45,848 MAN 2: Hall-of-famer Whitey Ford now on the field 314 00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:48,976 pleading with the crowd for some kind of sanity. 315 00:12:49,059 --> 00:12:51,729 MAN: Uh-oh, and a barrage of pretzels now 316 00:12:51,812 --> 00:12:54,064 knocking Whitey unconscious. 317 00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:55,608 Wow, this is, uh... 318 00:12:55,691 --> 00:12:57,735 This is a black day for baseball. 319 00:12:59,195 --> 00:13:00,696 Oh, cheer up, Mom. 320 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,656 You can't buy publicity like that. 321 00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:05,493 Thousands and thousands of people saw your pretzels 322 00:13:05,576 --> 00:13:07,203 injuring Whitey Ford. 323 00:13:07,286 --> 00:13:09,163 You could call them Whitey-Whackers. 324 00:13:09,246 --> 00:13:11,624 I was wrong to have a dream-- 325 00:13:11,707 --> 00:13:13,501 Wrong as usual. 326 00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:16,670 I mean, if you're nothing special, why kid yourself? 327 00:13:16,754 --> 00:13:18,589 Oh, Mom, no. 328 00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:20,216 Listen to your mother, kids. 329 00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:21,634 Aim low. 330 00:13:21,717 --> 00:13:24,804 Aim so low no one will even care if you succeed. 331 00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:26,764 Dinner's in the oven. 332 00:13:26,847 --> 00:13:29,183 If you want some butter, it's under my face. 333 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:35,731 Marge needs help, and God knows I'm not the man to provide it, 334 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:37,650 but I know who can. 335 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:46,325 Ah, it looks likes Mr. Pretzel-man 336 00:13:46,408 --> 00:13:48,452 is doing pretty well for himself. 337 00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,873 I'm here to see Mr. Ormand. 338 00:13:52,957 --> 00:13:55,835 Of course. Right this way. 339 00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:58,045 (organ playing) 340 00:13:58,128 --> 00:14:00,881 Oh, I guess I should speak to the executor of his estate. 341 00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:02,758 He's right over there. 342 00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,301 They were in the same car. 343 00:14:05,469 --> 00:14:07,263 You're my last hope. 344 00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:09,181 I've never reached out to you before, 345 00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,767 but my wife is in her hour of need. 346 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:14,979 Your help could make all the difference in the world. 347 00:14:15,062 --> 00:14:16,480 FAT TONY: Okay. 348 00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:17,731 See, boss? 349 00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:19,400 I told you that ad in the church bulletin 350 00:14:19,483 --> 00:14:20,776 would pay off. 351 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:27,658 (phone ringing) 352 00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:31,036 Hello? 353 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:34,248 No. Pretzel Wagon's no longer... 354 00:14:34,331 --> 00:14:36,667 300 pretzels? 355 00:14:36,750 --> 00:14:38,502 Wait. Wait. Let me get this down. 356 00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:40,087 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 357 00:14:40,170 --> 00:14:44,174 Meat Packer's Union Hall, Batavia, New York. 358 00:14:44,258 --> 00:14:46,385 I'll send them right out. 359 00:14:46,468 --> 00:14:47,386 Homer. 360 00:14:47,469 --> 00:14:48,679 Homie, wake up. 361 00:14:48,762 --> 00:14:50,431 Wake up, I'm back in business. 362 00:14:50,514 --> 00:14:53,684 I had a feeling things would work out for you, honey. 363 00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:57,438 Hey, what are you doing? 364 00:14:57,521 --> 00:14:59,690 This is a pretzel town, pretty boy. 365 00:14:59,773 --> 00:15:02,610 (jazz music plays) 366 00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:52,368 Are you sure the children will get enough nutrition 367 00:15:52,451 --> 00:15:53,369 from these pretzels? 368 00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:55,371 Yes, I am sure. 369 00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,706 Sure as sure can be. 370 00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,875 Oh, my God, what happened to your fingers? 371 00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,418 MAN WHISPERING: Boating accident. 372 00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:04,463 I believe it was a "boking" accident. 373 00:16:04,546 --> 00:16:07,424 I have to go now. 374 00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:10,552 I don't understand why they won't unload 375 00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:12,304 our falafel fixings. 376 00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:13,681 Ship's impounded, ma'am. 377 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:15,224 Yeah. We found a couple of barnacles 378 00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:16,392 on the hull. 379 00:16:16,475 --> 00:16:18,811 That and, uh, the deck was, uh, wet. 380 00:16:18,894 --> 00:16:20,854 That's crazy. 381 00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:23,273 And what are those men doing under my van? 382 00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:24,274 MAN: Let's get out of here! 383 00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:25,776 Look, lady, if I was you, 384 00:16:25,859 --> 00:16:27,194 I would just leap into the air 385 00:16:27,277 --> 00:16:28,195 as I'm preparing to do. 386 00:16:31,615 --> 00:16:32,533 Here you go, Homer. 387 00:16:32,616 --> 00:16:34,952 Thanks, Moe. 388 00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:37,955 Ah, Homer, you know your money's no good here. 389 00:16:38,038 --> 00:16:40,165 Hey, wait a minute. This is real money! 390 00:16:40,249 --> 00:16:42,710 Yeah. My wife is raking it in. 391 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:44,962 (bell rings) 392 00:16:45,045 --> 00:16:47,089 (whistling) 393 00:16:50,050 --> 00:16:51,719 (clears throat) 394 00:16:51,802 --> 00:16:53,012 Greetings, Homer. 395 00:16:53,095 --> 00:16:54,888 Hey, Fat Tony. 396 00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:56,473 You still with the mafia? 397 00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:59,059 Uh, yes, I am. 398 00:16:59,143 --> 00:17:00,436 Thank you for asking. 399 00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:03,355 Now, Homer, as you no doubt recall, 400 00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:05,441 you were done a favor by our-- 401 00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:08,819 how shall I say-- mafia crime syndicate. 402 00:17:08,902 --> 00:17:11,113 Oh, yeah. 403 00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:15,117 Now the time has come for you to do us a favor. 404 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,327 You mean the mob only did me a favor 405 00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:19,329 to get something in return? 406 00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:22,041 Oh, Fat Tony... 407 00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:25,002 I will say good day to you, sir. 408 00:17:25,085 --> 00:17:27,296 Okay, I will go. 409 00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:32,801 Hey, wait a minute. 410 00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:37,931 Well, here I am, 411 00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:41,518 11905 Dead Weasel Road. 412 00:17:41,602 --> 00:17:43,645 I don't see any apartment building. 413 00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:45,022 I just... 414 00:17:45,105 --> 00:17:47,399 -(tires squealing) -(Marge screams) 415 00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:50,277 Hey, what's going on? 416 00:17:56,825 --> 00:18:00,120 Is there a button or a release for these keys? 417 00:18:00,204 --> 00:18:02,664 Oh. Oh, you have to push in as you turn. 418 00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:05,084 -Ah. -Yeah, that's it. 419 00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:08,045 -Who are you? -We are your business partners, 420 00:18:08,128 --> 00:18:11,757 and as such, we are entitled to a percentage of your profits. 421 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:15,260 Something in the area of 100%. 422 00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:16,804 What are you talking about? 423 00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:18,388 We suggest you have a conversation 424 00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:19,890 with your husband. 425 00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:23,143 You have 24 hours to give us our money. 426 00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:25,854 And to show you we're serious, 427 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:27,231 you have 12 hours. 428 00:18:27,314 --> 00:18:30,234 -Huh? -See you at 6 a.m. 429 00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:35,364 Homer, did you tell the mafia 430 00:18:35,447 --> 00:18:36,907 they could eliminate my competitors 431 00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:39,243 with savage beatings and attempted murder? 432 00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:41,537 In those words? 433 00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:42,621 Yes. 434 00:18:42,704 --> 00:18:45,415 It just sickens me. 435 00:18:45,499 --> 00:18:47,417 How could you do this to someone you love? 436 00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:49,378 How could I not? 437 00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:50,963 I saw you pouring your heart and soul 438 00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:52,840 into this business and getting nowhere. 439 00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:54,258 I saw you desperately trying 440 00:18:54,341 --> 00:18:55,676 to cram one more salty treat 441 00:18:55,759 --> 00:18:57,970 into America's already bloated snack hole. 442 00:18:58,053 --> 00:19:00,013 So I did what I could. 443 00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:02,307 I did what any loving husband would do. 444 00:19:02,391 --> 00:19:04,643 I reached out to some violent mobsters. 445 00:19:04,726 --> 00:19:07,563 Oh, Homer, I know you were trying 446 00:19:07,646 --> 00:19:09,148 to shield me from failure 447 00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:11,150 but this is my business, 448 00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:14,278 and the mafia's not getting one cent of my money. 449 00:19:14,361 --> 00:19:15,779 So what are we going to do? 450 00:19:15,863 --> 00:19:17,739 We're going to do what we do every day. 451 00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:19,825 We're going to make pretzels. 452 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:30,419 There. That's the last one. 453 00:19:33,672 --> 00:19:36,133 (pretzel snaps) 454 00:19:36,216 --> 00:19:37,593 (knocking on door) 455 00:19:37,676 --> 00:19:38,552 (both gasp) 456 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,434 I had that dream again. 457 00:19:45,517 --> 00:19:48,437 Oh, thank God, it's only Grampa. 458 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:51,315 -(knocking) -Now what? 459 00:19:51,398 --> 00:19:55,485 -(both gasp) -Sorry we're late. 460 00:19:55,569 --> 00:19:57,404 Could we have the money now? 461 00:19:57,487 --> 00:19:59,489 The answer is no. 462 00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:02,159 I'm afraid I must insist. 463 00:20:02,242 --> 00:20:04,661 You see, my wife, she has been most vocal 464 00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:06,538 on the subject of the pretzel monies. 465 00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:07,915 "Where's the money? 466 00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,458 "When are you going to get the money? 467 00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:11,293 Why aren't you getting the money now?" 468 00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:12,628 And so on. 469 00:20:12,711 --> 00:20:14,880 So, please... The money. 470 00:20:14,963 --> 00:20:17,549 You heard her. She said no. 471 00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:21,887 Legs, Louie, advance on them. 472 00:20:21,970 --> 00:20:23,847 HELEN LOVEJOY: There they are. 473 00:20:27,726 --> 00:20:29,519 Well, well, if it isn't Marge Simpson 474 00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:31,021 and her gangland cronies. 475 00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:32,773 Your goon squads certainly gave you the edge 476 00:20:32,856 --> 00:20:34,441 in the mobile snack business. 477 00:20:34,524 --> 00:20:36,944 But I'm afraid we've outdone you once again. 478 00:20:37,027 --> 00:20:40,155 Hiroshi, Yukio. 479 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,658 Perhaps you've heard of the Yakuza, 480 00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:45,118 the Poison Fists of the Pacific Rim? 481 00:20:45,202 --> 00:20:47,120 The Japanese mafia. 482 00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:50,624 They'll kill you five times before you hit the ground. 483 00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:54,419 -All right. -Go! 484 00:20:57,422 --> 00:20:59,383 (grunting) 485 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:05,138 Hey! 486 00:21:06,765 --> 00:21:09,351 Take that. Take this. 487 00:21:10,644 --> 00:21:12,437 Come here, you little squirt. 488 00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:15,941 Homie, maybe we should go inside. 489 00:21:16,024 --> 00:21:17,276 But, Marge, that little guy 490 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:18,986 hasn't done anything yet. 491 00:21:19,069 --> 00:21:21,697 Look at him. He's going to do something 492 00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:23,615 and you know it's going to be good. 493 00:21:23,699 --> 00:21:26,493 (man kiais loudly) 494 00:21:26,576 --> 00:21:27,703 -(blow lands) -(body thuds) 495 00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:30,205 -Aw... -(blows landing) 496 00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:31,540 You must hate me, Marge. 497 00:21:31,623 --> 00:21:33,083 Every time I try to help, 498 00:21:33,166 --> 00:21:34,584 I just fail miserably. 499 00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:37,004 Oh, I don't hate you for failing. 500 00:21:37,087 --> 00:21:39,673 I love you for trying. 501 00:21:39,756 --> 00:21:42,342 -(yawning) -What's going on outside? 502 00:21:42,426 --> 00:21:44,303 Oh, it's just a mob war. 503 00:21:44,386 --> 00:21:45,721 Go back to sleep, honey. 504 00:21:48,682 --> 00:21:50,934 Forgiveness, please. 505 00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:01,445 ♪♪ 506 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:40,776 Shh! 507 00:22:44,154 --> 00:22:47,032 {\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.