‫Hello, everyone, here we have another modelled writing lesson for a task to question again, it's
‫in a more of a live environment, so there'll be less editing and you'll be watching me going through
‫the whole writing process.
‫So before we move on to take a look at our task to question, let's quickly remind ourselves what features
‫we need to include in our essay.
‫So I need to include a three sentence introduction.
‫I'm going to need to support paragraphs and a conclusion in the conclusion there may or may not be an
‫opinion sentence.
‫There needs to be some clear ordering and structure in my writing.
‫So that's really thinking about my organization.
‫I need to include some examples too.
‫And then for vocabulary and grammar, some topic specific vocabulary, sentence openers make them interesting
‫and a mix of sentence types that simple compound complex sentences which we covered in the earlier grammar
‫lesson in this section of the course.
‫OK, so I've just gone over my features checklist just to refresh my memory about what I need to include
‫in my writing.
‫So let's move ahead and take a look at the question.
‫So here is our question, let's have a read through and think about what type of question this is.
‫Many students now work whilst they are studying in college or university.
‫This often results in them having less time to concentrate on their studies as well as feeling under
‫pressure.
‫What are some of the causes of this?
‫What solutions could you suggest?
‫OK, so we've had a read through the question.
‫Before we move on to writing the plan, let's think about what kind of question this is so you can see
‫the last two sentences I've actually highlighted in italics.
‫What are some of the causes of this?
‫What solutions could you suggest?
‫So just from these two sentences, I can tell that this is a problem solution question.
‫I need to identify what problems that are featured in the question, and I need to suggest some ways
‫to fix or find solutions for this problem.
‫So that's quite straightforward.
‫I'm going to move on to writing my plan now, which is simply going to be a quick outlay, a quick outline
‫of what I will be doing in each body paragraph.
‫Let's just look back to the question so many students are working while studying for a college or university,
‫and it results in less time for concentrating on studies, as well as making them feel under pressure
‫or stressed.
‫So why are students doing this?
‫What kind of solutions can I suggest?
‫So why are students working when they should be studying?
‫I think the obvious answer to that is quite simply, for money.
‫So if we say financial reasons for working, so we could say loans, accommodation, and here I need
‫to suggest a solution.
‫So what can I say for the solution?
‫You could say free grants, free government grants.
‫So the government giving students money whilst they are studying for a government grant.
‫So we could say so free government grants.
‫We could also say subsidized, subsidized, subsidized accommodation, accommodation, changed it to
‫the Americans for help.
‫But that's OK.
‫Subsidized accommodation, OK, a free government grant subsidized accommodation.
‫So in my first paragraph, I'm going to talk about the financial reasons for student wanting to earn
‫money while studying, which is probably the main reason, I'm sure.
‫And my solution is for government to give free grants or to subsidize accommodation subsidized means
‫to provide something for a very small price.
‫So it may be that the government supply student accommodation for 20 percent of the normal price.
‫This is what I'll talk about in this paragraph.
‫And the other idea that comes to mind for my second body paragraph is to talk about our work experience,
‫so it may be that students are trying to get work experience before finishing their studies, which
‫will make it easier for students to find employment.
‫So let's say for work experience and a solution for this problem of sort of working while studying could
‫be to offer work experience in courses.
‫And here I'll say sandwich course.
‫So this is a bit of topic specific vocabulary.
‫A sandwich course is generally considered academic and work experience.
‫For example, a four year sandwich course, maybe three years studying and one year work experience.
‫These kind of courses generally take away some of the problems of students working while studying.
‫OK, so let's have a read three paragraph one financial reasons for working, maybe that paying off
‫loans or accommodation and how can I solve this problem of students needed money and working while studying,
‫I've suggested that government could give grants or subsidize accommodation to help them financially.
‫And for my second paragraph, I'm suggesting that a cause for students needing to work while studying
‫is for work experience.
‫And I suggested my solution is to offer work experience in courses.
‫So try and push this idea of more sandwich courses to try and help students concentrate more on their
‫studies.
‫OK, so that is my plan complete.
‫I feel quite confident now that I understand the question and I know what I will be writing.
‫Now, you may remember that in our support or body paragraphs for a problem solution question, the
‫sentence types that we need to use are slightly different.
‫And we covered this a few lessons ago in this section of the course.
‫So I think it would be wise to go over that now.
‫Let's take a look just to refresh our memory, so supporting paragraphs for a problem, solution type
‫question, we still have topic, sentence, support sentence.
‫But if you remember, we also need to include a solution sentence and a result sentence.
‫This was obviously covid a few lessons ago.
‫If you need, please go back and refresh your memory more.
‫But effectively, each supporting paragraph can be four sentences long.
‫Or you might want to add a little bit more detail to these sentences to make sure you're hitting the
‫word count.
‫But so when I write my essay now for this student working question, I'm going to write four sentences
‫for each supporting paragraph.
‫So topic, sentence, support, sentence, solution, sentence and result sentence.
‫So let me move on to writing this report.
‫OK, so let's begin with our three sentence introduction.
‫So the first sentence in the introduction wants to be a paraphrase of the question.
‫Many students now work whilst they are studying in college or university.
‫This often results in them having less time to concentrate on their studies as well as feeling under
‫pressure.
‫So I need to get that into one sentence and paraphrase as best as I can to introduce the problem and
‫the essay.
‫I might begin with increasingly, increasingly, students are having to work while studying to studying,
‫meaning they are unable to concentrate.
‫What synonym can I think of here focus?
‫Meaning they are unable to focus fully on their studies, on their learning, let's say, on their learning.
‫OK, so that's pretty much the problem.
‫Increasingly, students are having to work while studying, meaning they are unable to focus fully on
‫their learning.
‫And we've got an interesting sentence here.
‫It seems to be a complex sentence.
‫OK, so we now need to write our plan.
‫So we can start this, as always, in this essay, I will discuss this rising problem and suggest solutions
‫and you could, in fact use this in every single problem solution essay.
‫You can copy this pretty much straight into any problem solution essay.
‫And now I need to say exactly what I will be doing in this essay.
‫So we begin an outline with firstly, I will explore instead of discuss why students, I will explore
‫the financial implications, reasons, implications for students needing to find employment whilst working
‫now instead of just saying for students needing to work, I wanted to train very and make my language
‫more interesting.
‫So instead of just students needing to find work, I decided employment, some using a mix of language
‫in my essay.
‫Firstly, I will explore the financial implications for students needing to find employment whilst working.
‫And secondly, secondly, and secondly.
‫And secondly, sorry.
‫And secondly, I will discuss how work experience may influence their decision to work.
‫OK, so let's have a quick read.
‫Three Increasingly students are having to work while studying, meaning they are unable to focus fully
‫on their learning.
‫In this essay, I will discuss this rising problem and suggest solutions.
‫Firstly, I will explore the financial implications for students needing to find employment whilst working.
‫And I've realised, I've said whilst working.
‫So whilst studying that highlights, it's quite important to try and quickly read back your writing,
‫which I would definitely recommend you do.
‫And secondly, I will discuss how work experience may influence their decision to work.
‫So I think that's a very strong three sentence introduction so I can now move on to my support paragraph.
‫So from the plan we were starting off to discuss in the first paragraph about the financial reasons
‫for students needing to work.
‫It is true that education can be very expensive for students needing further education.
‫That's my topic sentence, I'm talking about the expense, the financial implications, and I need a
‫support sentence here.
‫Let's say as a result, as a result of needing money for student finance, I'm using some topic specific
‫vocabulary.
‫This is a collocation student finance and living expenses.
‫As a result of needing money for student finance and living expenses, many and I need a synonym now
‫for student as I feel like I'm repeating student too often, let his undergraduates undergraduates.
‫That's more specifically for universities.
‫But again, topic specific vocabulary.
‫As a result of needing money for student finance and living expenses, many undergraduates are needing
‫to find new revenue.
‫Let's not say new revenue.
‫That sounds strange and needing to find work.
‫Let's just say find work.
‫OK, now I need my solution sentence so I can suggest what solutions can be created to solve this problem.
‫Let's begin with one solution.
‫One solution to this problem could be local governments funding students with free grants and subsidized
‫subsidized accommodation.
‫And then I need to say what the result is.
‫So it's my result sentence as a result.
‫Of this added support, students would feel less stressed and worried about needing to finance their
‫learning journey or learning their learning and studying.
‫And studying, which may also lead to higher scores in their studies.
‫OK, so quickly read this, but it is true that education can be very expensive for students needing
‫further education.
‫I feel like I'm repeating myself a little bit there.
‫So I'm going to say for students needing further studies as a result of needing money for student finance
‫and living expenses, many undergraduates are needing to find work.
‫One solution to this problem could be local government funding students with free grants and subsidized
‫accommodation as a result of this added support.
‫Students would feel less stressed and worried about needing to finance their learning and studying,
‫which may also lead to higher scores in their studies.
‫OK, so that's my first paragraph complete.
‫I now will move on to speaking about work experience so students wanting to work to gain real life experience,
‫which will obviously help them when they finish their studies.
‫Let me begin say another cause for students working whilst attending, let's say academic institutions,
‫institutions is to gain real life work experience to help find employment post studies.
‫OK, that's my topic sentence.
‫So one of the causes is work experience.
‫So let's add my support sentence.
‫We can say and our can let's get an interesting opener.
‫Consequently, many students are concentrating on finding desired work experience and not focusing their
‫energies on studies and learning.
‫Consequently, many students are concentrating on finding desired work experience and not focusing their
‫energies on studies and learning.
‫OK.
‫And I now need a solution for this.
‫And you remember from my plan, I was suggesting some which courses one suggested solution to this issue
‫could be to offer more sandwich courses, which include an amount of in-house, which means at an office
‫or workplace, an amount of in-house working
‫working experience and will now move on to our result sentence.
‫So let's begin with this would have a beneficial.
‫Beneficial impact on student attainment.
‫So that is a great piece of topic specific vocabulary for education attainment means how well you score
‫in your learning.
‫For example, student attainment was high.
‫It meant that many students were passing.
‫So this would have a beneficial impact on student attainment as as my connective as learners could focus
‫on their courses
‫at all times.
‫OK, so let's read this back.
‫Another cause for students working whilst attending academic institutions is to gain real life work
‫experience to help find employment post studies after studies.
‫Consequently, many students are concentrating on finding desired work experience and not focusing their
‫energies on studies and learning.
‫One suggested solution to this issue could be to offer more sandwich courses, which include an amount
‫of in-house working experience.
‫This would have a beneficial impact, a great collocation there on student attainment, some really
‫good topic, specific vocabulary as learners could focus on their courses at all times.
‫OK, my support paragraphs are complete, so it's now time to go to my conclusion, which is not going
‫to include my opinion.
‫So I just need to paraphrase this issue and everything that I've discussed in one sentence here.
‫Let's begin with, in conclusion, a great way to start your conclusion paragraph.
‫In conclusion, we can see that this is a difficult issue for people wanting to study as the need to
‫work is obviously high with many different reasons for needing employment.
‫That kind of just sums up the whole issue in one sentence.
‫In conclusion, we can see that this is a difficult issue for people wanting to study as the need to
‫work is obviously high with many different reasons for needing employment.
‫So that's my conclusion in one sentence, and that's the report in full.
‫That's my sorry essay.
‫My task to essay in full.
‫Let's quickly go through the features checklist, say three sentence introduction is there to support
‫paragraphs.
‫Yes, we have them conclusion.
‫Definitely a clear ordering.
‫Now, I made the plan which made me concentrate on one problem and solution for each paragraph.
‫So that's definitely well structured, thanks to my plan examples.
‫Yes, I give lots of examples about who could solve problems and how the solutions would help students.
‫So I'm giving lots of examples.
‫Topic specific vocabulary.
‫Yes, we said that we've included some really good topic, specific vocabulary, sentence openers.
‫In conclusion, another cause it is true increasingly.
‫Definitely we have this and a mix of sentence types.
‫Definitely.
‫I have some simple sentences, I think somewhere and lots of compound and complex sentences.
‫So I know that I've included the sort of core features in my essay.
‫And yes, that brings us to the end of this muddled writing lesson.
‫I hope that you found it useful.
‫See you in the next lesson.