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‫Hello and welcome back to another muddled writing lesson.

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‫So this is an updated lesson, slightly newer than some of the other model, right.

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‫Lessons.

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‫And just because you have been asking me for more of these lesson types, I do agree.

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‫I think they're really useful for your learning process during the EO.

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‫So I'm just adding more for you now.

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‫Of course, today we'll be looking at the topic of tourism and will be working through, again, a range

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‫of question types for adults writing test, too.

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‫So let's jump right in.

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‫Let's take a look at our question.

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‫OK, so tourism is encouraged in many countries.

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‫Does tourism bring more advantages or disadvantages to a country?

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‫Okay, interesting question.

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‫So first thing and this is exactly what you should be doing, identify the question type and think about

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‫the structure of your essay.

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‫So we have advantages and disadvantages.

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‫Pretty straightforward.

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‫This is an advantages and disadvantages question.

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‫No need to give an opinion.

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‫It's not asked.

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‫So this is our question sentence here.

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‫Tourism is encouraged in many countries.

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‫What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

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‫Okay, so of course, introduction paragraph always the same.

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‫We have supporting paragraph one and supporting paragraph two and I can really start hashing out my

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‫plan.

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‫One thing I do want to say again, when you're writing your plan, there is no need to write really

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‫long, grammatically accurate sentences.

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‫You can write this in note form, really short.

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‫Don't worry about the grammar.

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‫You're not assessed on your plan.

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‫OK, well, let's just write Puan.

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‫You can write Espie supporting paragraph Wempe one is the same.

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‫No problem.

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‫And I'm going to basically explore the advantages of tourism in paragraph one.

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‫So what are some of the advantages?

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‫The first thing I say is boost to economy.

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‫Economy that would go boost to economy.

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‫That's a big one.

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‫Tourism is a really great boost for many local and national economies, although sometimes it can be

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‫a disadvantage because if for some reason, example, covid tourism decreases, then some countries

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‫find themselves in problems.

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‫Maybe this could be part of paragraph to boost to economy.

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‫What other advantages can I think of?

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‫What else does tourism bring?

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‫I think it would be nice to talk about understanding different cultures, this global awareness, lovely

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‫expression.

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‫We could use that boost the economy, understanding different cultures that would probably give me about

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‫enough to explore these two big advantages if I have really described them fully, give examples further

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‫my ideas with extra structures, that would probably be OK.

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‫Pitou, let's explore the disadvantages.

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‫Tourism is encouraged in many countries.

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‫Let's say reliance can be bad, for example, for example, can be bad.

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‫And then if we put, let's say, covid here or any pandemic or any decrease in tourists arriving in

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‫a place can be really bad for the local economy.

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‫If they are too reliant on that source of income, what else is a big disadvantage to the country?

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‫I think a few things we could say is damage to environment, environment.

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‫There we go.

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‫Damage to environment.

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‫It's not always the case, but sometimes tourism can damage the environment.

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‫For example, again, another for example, for instance, if there are lots of tourists on, say,

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‫a popular beach path, they can a road, they can damage the path just by the amount of foot falls.

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‫Just an example for you there.

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‫Okay, so damage to the environment.

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‫I might just add one more in case I need to add a bit more writing.

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‫What else is a disadvantage of tourism?

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‫We could probably talk about misunderstandings as a disadvantage to damage to environment.

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‫We could also talk about plane journeys, tourism off.

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‫Uses planes flight, and this is also a big cause of damage to the environment, misunderstandings between

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‫cultures can sometimes cause arguments or heated debates, a smaller disadvantage, but definitely relevant

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‫to this question.

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‫So I would be scoring well on task achievement and no need to include my opinion here.

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‫So we can just leave with this.

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‫This is my plan.

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‫OK, so I think now's the time.

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‫I'm not going to have this when I start writing.

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‫I just need to think back.

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‫But of course, in your test, you will.

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‫I think it's time that we begin our writing now.

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‫OK, so let's begin with, of course, our introduction.

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‫So we need to paraphrase our question statements here.

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‫Our question sentence.

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‫Tourism is encouraged in many countries.

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‫I'm not going to use a synonym for tourism.

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‫I actually think I might end up repeating this word quite a lot.

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‫Tourism, tourists, travellers, we could maybe say globetrotters trying to think of other words,

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‫but sometimes there isn't many useful synonyms.

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‫So let's not worry too much about changing this word.

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‫Tourism is encouraged in many countries.

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‫Let's maybe change the structure slightly instead of starting with tourism.

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‫I'm going to start with many countries, many countries.

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‫So I'm almost flipping the the sentence here and flipping it by starting with the end of it.

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‫Another way, to paraphrase, is to change the order.

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‫Many countries around the world, around the world, a nice extra bit of detail.

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‫Many countries around the world enjoy and encourage tourism, enjoy and encourage tourism and traveling

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‫visitors, visitors.

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‫So I've really added quite a lot to this sentence.

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‫Here is probably some advanced paraphrasing.

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‫Many countries around the world enjoy and encourage tourism and travelling visitors.

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‫I do like that.

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‫I think there's a strong opening structure in this essay.

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‫In this essay, I will explore the advantages.

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‫I can almost write this with my eyes closed and disadvantages, disadvantages of this trend pretty much

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‫always can use this with the comet to open your plan sentence.

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‫So we have paraphrase pollen and then of course, outline.

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‫Now I will explore.

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‫I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.

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‫OK, firstly, I will explore.

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‫I've already used that.

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‫I will weigh up the advantages of tourism.

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‫And secondly, I will also check your spelling.

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‫Of course, I will discuss the disadvantages that tourism repeating myself.

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‫But that's OK can bring.

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‫OK, let's have a quick read through.

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‫Many countries around the world enjoy and encourage tourism and travelling visitors.

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‫In this essay I will explore the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.

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‫Firstly, I will weigh up a nice phrasal verb, the advantages of tourism, and secondly, I will discuss

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‫the disadvantages that tourism can bring.

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‫Very nice and nice opening introduction there.

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‫It's also worth me saying whilst writing, I'm sure I've probably said this a few times.

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‫It's good to read back and edit part of editing.

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‫Writing is doing this editing whilst writing, reading back, changing things, making sure your spelling

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‫is good, making sure your grammar is accurate.

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‫OK, so first up, I'm going to explore the advantages and the first thing that I said was a boost to

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‫the economy.

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‫OK, let's begin this supporting paragraph one.

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‫Let's start let's think of a nice opening phrase here.

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‫Quite clearly, one of the biggest benefits of global and local tourism is the huge boost to economies,

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‫economies that this can bring.

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‫That's my topic sentence quite clearly.

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‫Quite clearly.

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‫One of the biggest benefits of global and local tourism is the huge boost to economies that this can

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‫bring and now add more detail or let's say so we want to give it.

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‫This is kind of my extra supporting sentence here.

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‫So I want to elaborate on this a bit more.

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‫What type of money?

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‫How is it spent?

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‫Many people know that when they travel, they will quite often spend a lot of money hyphen, really

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‫nice bit of punctuation to add a small detail quite often in local shops or businesses.

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‫So this hyphen here is a really advanced piece of punctuation, a nice way to show off to the examiner,

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‫and we just use it at the end of a structure to add a bit more detail.

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‫So I've just got this quite often in local shops of businesses.

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‫Now, this doesn't work on its own.

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‫It needs this sentence here.

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‫So I have a complex sentence.

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‫Many people know that when they travel.

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‫They will often spend a lot of money, I don't think I need the comma, because this is my Lincolnwood

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‫in a sense.

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‫Many people know that when they travel, they will quite often spend a lot of money, some time, some

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‫editing here.

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‫Quite often.

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‫Let's change this.

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‫Sometimes in local shops or businesses, for example, as people visit new places they will purchase,

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‫don't want to say bye.

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‫Too often they will purchase goods.

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‫And let's say what's what's the word for tourist products, touristy products.

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‫What would that would be?

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‫I think we can probably use souvenirs.

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‫Maybe they will purchase goods and souvenirs.

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‫That's a nice word.

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‫And souvenirs of this place as well as.

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‫So let me just check this structure now.

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‫I'm adding quite a lot of commerce.

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‫Remember, often simple is better.

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‫For example, as people visit new places, they will purchase goods and souvenirs or and souvenirs of

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‫this place.

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‫And I've added place here as visit new, let's say, what can we say?

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‫Instead of place new locations, they will purchase goods and souvenirs of this place as well as using

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‫local.

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‫I want to say transport, as well as using local facilities such as transport or shop or shops, we

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‫could say, or restaurants.

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‫That would be good to mention.

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‫Just adding more detail as I write less of a quick read back.

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‫For example, as people visit new locations, they will purchase goods and souvenirs of this place,

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‫as well as using local facilities such as transport or restaurants.

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‫Lovely.

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‫So I've really given some good examples here of boosts to the economy in terms of buying goods and souvenirs,

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‫as well as using transport or restaurants, these facilities.

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‫OK, very nice.

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‫What was my second point?

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‫I just took a quick look there.

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‫It was understanding different cultures.

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‫Furthermore, a great advantage of people visiting countries or cities they have never been to can be

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‫that they develop their understanding of a new and foreign culture.

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‫So this was my second point.

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‫It was about developing more of a global understanding, a global mindset.

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‫Furthermore, a great advantage of people visiting countries or cities they have never been to can be

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‫that they develop their understanding of a new and foreign culture.

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‫This can lead to a better, a better knowledge of how people around the world live differently.

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‫Differently, for example, did I use, for example, before, for instance, less use, for instance,

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‫for instance, by understanding or let's say by knowing, because we've used understanding previously,

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‫I think understanding is OK by understanding different cultures.

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‫We can all come to respect each other much more.

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‫OK, lovely.

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‫So I've I'm just sort of sharing this different understanding.

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‫Different cultures is my main point for this second part of supporting paragraph one, the advantages.

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‫Furthermore, a great advantage of people visiting countries or cities they have never been to can be

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‫that they develop their understanding of a new and foreign culture.

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‫That's almost a little too long, but it's grammatically accurate.

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‫It still works well.

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‫This can lead to a better knowledge of how people around the world live differently.

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‫For instance, by understanding different cultures, we can all come to respect each other much more.

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‫A lovely final sentence here.

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‫OK, so that's great.

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‫Supporting paragraph one is done.

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‫I think it's time for supporting paragraph two, which is, of course, the disadvantages.

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‫So the first thing I said was quick, look, reliance can be bad.

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‫On the other hand.

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‫On the other hand, one of the biggest disadvantages of tourism can be reliance on this as a source

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‫of income.

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‫Reliance, so this is my point here.

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‫So if a country, for example, or even just an area is reliant on tourists and the tourists stop coming,

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‫it can be devastating for their local economy.

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‫On the other hand, one of the biggest disadvantages of tourism can be reliance.

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‫And this as a source of income covid.

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‫I want to discuss covid maybe I could say use of it in the example.

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‫If an area relies heavily on tourists spending money spending money there, but tourists stop visiting,

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‫I think this might need some editing if an area relies heavily on tourists spending money there, but

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‫tourists do stop visiting.

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‫Think that sounds just a little bit better that tourists visiting than this can be devastating, devastating

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‫for the local economy, economy, economy.

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‫There we go.

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‫OK, and I also want to give an example now.

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‫I've used, for example, have used for instance, I might just jump straight into this example.

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‫If an area relies heavily on tourist spending money there, but tourists do stop visiting, then this

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‫can be devastating for the local economy.

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‫Instead of, for example, I'm just going to open with covid 19 has meant that global tourism has crashed,

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‫has crashed, leaving many countries.

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‫Who rely who need tourists for income in a poor financial situation.

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‫OK, so my example sentence here, covid-19, is that global tourism has crashed, leaving many countries

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‫who need tourists for income in a poor, in a very poor, in a dire would be even better.

232
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‫That's a lovely word in a dire financial situation.

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‫OK, so my second point here is about this reliance.

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‫I've got my topic sentence to introduce.

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‫I've got my support sentence here.

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‫Just giving a bit more information, explaining in a little bit more detail and my example to further

237
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‫explain my detail, really hammering that task achievement score here using this structure.

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‫OK, and my second point.

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‫Was damage to the environment.

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‫I also said about misunderstandings between different people, but possibly won't have time to fit that

241
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‫in, as really I'm aiming for just above two hundred and fifty words.

242
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‫OK, so as well as this as well as this globe trotting, slightly strange phrase to use, but I just

243
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‫don't want to use tourism too much.

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‫Globetrotting can also mean a huge increase in environmental envie run mental issues, pollution, less

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‫pollution and problems, pollution and problems.

246
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‫Let's just read this back as well as this globetrotting can also mean a huge increase in environmental

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‫pollution and problems.

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‫Many people need to travel by plane.

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‫This is almost an example sentence here.

250
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‫I'm being specific about what type of pollution.

251
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‫So that's OK.

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‫Maybe this is really supposed to be my support sentence, but maybe I'll give two examples for this.

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‫Many people need to travel by planes.

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‫And as we know, planes are a huge contributor, contributor to CO2, to carbon emissions, which lead

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‫to global warming.

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‫Also, furthermore, in addition, might be a little bit better.

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‫In addition, in addition to this, as tourists travel to a location, they may cause pollution through

258
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‫littering or not caring for the local environment environment.

259
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‫So really, I've given two examples here of the types of environmental pollution.

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‫That's my first example is planes.

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‫My second example here is just about sort of tourists, maybe not caring so much about the environment.

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‫In addition to this is tourist travel to a location they may cause pollution through littering or not

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‫caring for the local environment as the local population might.

264
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‫Just a little extra added addition at the end.

265
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‫OK, yeah, I think that works great and here is my conclusion sentence just to finish off.

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‫In conclusion, we can clearly see that there are many advantages and disadvantages

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‫when considering the effects of tourism.

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‫Apologies for spelling mistakes as I go.

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‫It's because I'm writing speaking at the same time.

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‫Two things at once is often difficult to do.

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‫In conclusion, we can clearly see that there are many advantages and disadvantages when considering

272
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‫the effects of tourism.

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‫Really easy to write these conclusions that pretty much follow very much the same structure.

274
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‫OK, so that is this task to essay in full.

275
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‫I would maybe suggest pausing this video and reading through this maybe not one time, but two, three,

276
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‫four, five times.

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‫Try and rehearse and learn the structures that I use, the, the language that I use, the linking words

278
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‫and try and use this sort of language in your writing to this would score aband nine.

279
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‫I'm pretty confident of that.

280
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‫It's probably if I don't mind saying so myself, it really does tackle the question.

281
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‫Well, so TASC achievements good.

282
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‫It's got a good range of grammar without error and vocabulary, as far as I can tell.

283
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‫Obviously now the best thing to do would be to read through an edit if you have time.

284
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‫And I think one thing we need to check is the word count.

285
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‫So let's take a look at that.

286
00:24:39,780 --> 00:24:42,840
‫OK, so this stands at

287
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‫eight words, pretty much perfect, I wouldn't really recommend going much higher than this.

288
00:24:53,370 --> 00:24:57,210
‫And of course, remembering that we need to stick within that 40 minute period.

289
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‫OK, so I hope you enjoyed this lesson.

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‫And of course, let's move on to our next model.

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‫Right.

